Would you fight an adult chimpanzee armed with nothing but a knife for a billion?

[shadowwalker021]

Conditions:

- If you agree to it in this thread then you are magically transported to a cage (30'^3) which contains an enraged adult chimpanzee (150 lbs).

- You are given a 6 inch sharpened hunting knife.

- At any point you can back out of the match, but if you do then you will owe the organizer $100,000. If you back out of the match at a point where you've sustained serious injury then medical care will be free.

- If you manage to kill the chimpanzee then you will receive $1,000,000,000 & prompt medical care.

- If the chimpanzee renders you unconscious or is about to strike a death blow or you are about to die from blood loss then the match will be stopped immediately and you'll be given free medical care so that you won't die; but you'll have to live on afterwards with whatever mutilation/disfigurement/dismemberment that you suffered without any compensation.

Would you accept?

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Keep in mind that chimps are dirty fighters who will pull and bite off genitals, eyes, ears, noses, fingers. If you fail then it's basically a given that you'll be tortured beyond comprehension and your body and face will be mutilated and rearranged.

Pic of a chimp since the misc likes pics:

[FixFox]

definitely. if you put a pitbull that would be a different story

[Skinnygeorge]

yes, i would just keep kicking it, probably win without a scratch

do i get to wear shoes?

[shadowwalker021]

definitely. if you put a pitbull that would be a different story

well that goes without saying

[VeniVidiVici92]

I don't think any of you realise how strong a chimp is.

[IronDeadlifter]

Would tear that little fukr apart

1 B pls

[idontdeadlift]

yes, i would just keep kicking it, probably win without a scratch

[bigshooter28]

With knife of course. Without knife...no thanks, I quite like my face, limbs etc.

[notamysoginist]

everyone should be aware of this http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showth...hp?t=146108803 before voting

[Boombaux]

id rather fight a bull to be honest
-go to stab chimp
-chimp is fast as phuck and grabs your wrist
-rips your arm out of its socket and rips your nose off

[lemonic]

nope. even if you "win" you will be so massively mutilated no amount of cash on this planet is gonna make your miserable life remotely enjoyable.

[IronLionZion420]

Would have mad sex with the little chimp afterwards smoke a blunt. Then pow knive in the eye.

[iMarteenez]

If this knife is sharp enough to sever a limb, wait till the chimp llunges and take it apart limb by limb.

[Laudrup]

I wouldn't fight it, the chimp would tear you to pieces if you missed with the first stab or slash. They are freakishly powerful.

[shadowwalker021]

strong poll results so far. 90% would accept this match. good luck on your balloon face, sightless, no fingers or balls goals of 2012 misc.

[TeutonKnight]

Id do it for free, lol at u *******s being afraid of a stupid animal

[TeutonKnight]

how big is a chimp anyway?

[SamF]

Go to stick the chimp and he tears the hand holding the knife off. Game over. I've been pretty close to a 190lb male chimp, I would never want to fight it. Hands were massive.

[IronDeadlifter]

Lol at everyone saying chimps are "so strong"

It's because you fuking pussies don't know how to utilize the maximum amount of strength you have

In Human Society we are literally taught to kind of hold back, a lot of you underestimate how strong you can be.

What do these guys do? Well Gorillas are just animals, brb deadlifting 6,000lbs but Chimpanzees? They just know how to fukin fight and survive, they use their strength as much as they can

With that being said: A Human Male benching tree fiddy and squatting and deadlifting 500 would tear apart a 150lb chimpanzee.

[autrefois]

if i can outreach it i can slash it's throat, eyes etc

[jayohthatman]

so suffer permanent physical damage to an unknown degree for a billion? no thanks money cant replace brain damage, blindness, neck/back injury etc

[Skinnygeorge]

a bjj black belt could easily make a chimp tap out

[asianmanlet]

"Bauman took his study on the road, attempting tests at the Philadelphia Zoo and making inquiries as far afield as Chicago and Cincinnati. In 1926, he returned to the Bronx Zoo, successfully testing the largest chimpanzee then in captivity. That animal, named Boma, pulled 847 pounds one-handed."

"The apes were less-than-willing participants in the study. They were more apt to tear apart the shiny dynamometer than pull on it, and, unless the ape had a "distinctly vicious disposition," she was unlikely to approach the experimental task with much vigor. Bauman managed to rig his device outside the cage, feeding in a rope for the apes to work on. Then, amazingly, one of the Bronx chimpanzees—a former circus ape named Suzette—managed to pull 1,260 pounds."

brb average untrained chimps can deadlift 1260 with two hands and 847 one handed

[shadowwalker021]

Lol at everyone saying chimps are "so strong"

It's because you fuking pussies don't know how to utilize the maximum amount of strength you have

In Human Society we are literally taught to kind of hold back, a lot of you underestimate how strong you can be.

What do these guys do? Well Gorillas are just animals, brb deadlifting 6,000lbs but Chimpanzees? They just know how to fukin fight and survive, they use their strength as much as they can

With that being said: A Human Male benching tree fiddy and squatting and deadlifting 500 would tear apart a 150lb chimpanzee.

delusional 17 year old/10

[E90335i]

A billion could buy me a sports team. Yes, of course I would chance it.

[Zen18]

id risk my life for a billion.

[Skinnygeorge]

Ben Cochrum 1922

Manitoba. North of Fisher river on Lake Winnipeg. The victim's bones were found among the remains of 11 wolves. Seven had been shot and four had been clubbed to death. Only after his rifle stock was smashed did the trapper apparently cease to fight and succumb to the wolf pack.

humans > apes

[Kaya5]

Lol at everyone saying chimps are "so strong"

It's because you fuking pussies don't know how to utilize the maximum amount of strength you have

In Human Society we are literally taught to kind of hold back, a lot of you underestimate how strong you can be.

What do these guys do? Well Gorillas are just animals, brb deadlifting 6,000lbs but Chimpanzees? They just know how to fukin fight and survive, they use their strength as much as they can

With that being said: A Human Male benching tree fiddy and squatting and deadlifting 500 would tear apart a 150lb chimpanzee.

[iMarteenez]

I think agility would be the greatest factor of this.

[GhettoHustler69]

**** no. Anyone that thinks they can even take a Chimp is a dumbass.