Is it best to rely on it? Usually, in the past, I have and it's never led me wrong. Here's the story, I'll try to use cliffs but explain as best I can.
-been with boyfriend for 2 years
-everything has been awesome thus far, barely ever fight, awesome sex, etc.
-got in big, blow out fight Saturday
-he basically told me I annoy him/get on his nerves
-overheard him tell his single friend "it must be nice to be free" (meaning to be single again)
-really hurt my feelings. I would never say something like that because it's not how I feel
-since then, things have been real cold between us. Not feeling affectionate at all, not wanting to make a fool of myself
-he has always had a screen lock on his phone but told me what it was...he changed it since the fight
Question: is this shady behavior? He has always had random girls trying to hit on him/talk to him. He is very outgoing but he always tells me he only wants me, etc. Why would he change the lock on his phone at this point when it's always been the same & he knows I've always known it. Help me out here please. Serious responses appreciated... I love this guy. He's the best thing to happen to me. Hard working, talented, smart, generous/kind to everyone, treats me awesome except the very rare fight we have. Thanks!
05-24-2012, 06:21 AM #1
When you have a gut feeling something isn't right...
05-24-2012, 06:22 AM #2
05-24-2012, 06:25 AM #3
05-24-2012, 06:38 AM #4
05-24-2012, 08:55 AM #5
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05-24-2012, 09:04 AM #6
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I think it is time for a talk.
What did you fight about? I think, in general but some people are different, guys don't really think hard about how they feel so the fight may have made him think a bit that he's not totally happy in the relationship. It seems like, as another poster said, he's partially checked out since the fight.
You need to talk to him.. he could be thinking everything is fine while you feel like things have become cold and unaffectionate. In terms of the phone lock thing... have you always been checking to see if he changed the password or just since the fight? I would say it is rather shady that he changed it and pushes me further into thinking he may want out but doesn't mean he is cheating or talking to girls on his phone. Could also be a way for him to increase his independence
Talk it out. If he is hesitant to even have the talk with you I would say it's close to being over... no ideas for what you can do to make him change his mind...
05-24-2012, 09:14 AM #7
i don't understand the phone lock? prior to this argument, he let you look through his phone? if so...why?
is this something you asked to have access to, or ...?
not understanding that piece of it. could u explain a bit more?The greatest challenge in life, is discovering who you are…the second biggest one, is being happy with what you find. - unknown
05-24-2012, 09:54 AM #8
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05-24-2012, 10:02 AM #9b0yer- Monster By May Log- http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=159121171&p=1183014941#post1183014941
05-24-2012, 10:54 AM #10
I say trust your gut, too.
I repped you as well, OP.
At the end of the day, we get what we accept. No one is perfect...I'm sure there's things you might do that bug him, and he, to you. But, you talk things out if you care about the person. Second, I think he likes the attention from other women...so, the whole thing just says to me, he wants to be single. It happens, sometimes. Don't let it consume you.The greatest challenge in life, is discovering who you are…the second biggest one, is being happy with what you find. - unknown
05-24-2012, 11:03 AM #11
I think one of the most valuable things I learned on this forum is pay attention to what people are doing. This is a million times better than what they're saying. You will feel worse if or when this guy bails on you when you had a gut feeling. Even if he hangs around, why are you willing to put yourself through the torment of feeling unimportant in his eyes and wondering all the time?
Its ok that this hurts, its normal. but don't hurt yourself on top of this by stringing this along. His actions are simple and clear. sorry your'e going through this
05-24-2012, 12:54 PM #12
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05-24-2012, 01:21 PM #13
Candy is dandy but I like liquor way better
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05-29-2012, 07:46 AM #14
Thanks so much for all the solid answers guys. I talked to him about it. I told him if he's lost interest to just man up and tell me, that I'd rather get it over with now than later. He still insists that he didn't mean what he said, that he was just frustrated and had a bad day. We went away this weekend with friends and everything felt back to normal. No arguing, fighting, nothing. Besides this rough patch, he honestly treats me like a queen, calls me Mrs. __his last name__, etc. Oh and about the lock on his phone, it was never about me looking through his phone (texts and what not). He told me what the pass code was so I could access his phone to play music on road trips, etc, and he told me what the new pass code is (he changed it because his co-worker used his phone and he didn't want him to know the old pass code). So I feel ok about that now. I feel like if he wanted out, he would have and should have taken the opportunity to do it when I told him to man up and tell me. Thanks again guys.
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