Work and food intolerances

[Babyghanoosh]

My job has a lot of get togethers, parties, lunches, etc. How does people who have food intolerances or just not want to eat all of the food served at these get-togethers deal with the negative comments? One woman made a comment to my co-worker that they could thread me through a needle and I'm not even too skinny; I'm 5'3.5 and 128lbs. She has a candy bowl on her desk and I have stood there many times eating chocolate from the bowl.

I don't like to talk about my food intolerances but it always seems to come up because of all of the parties we have and I am so sick of having to explain why I am not eating or why I am bringing my own food. Sometimes I refrain from attending but I want to be a team player and my boss wants me to attend.

I am sure there are many others here who deal with this on a daily basis. What do you do in these situations? Maybe I'm just being too self-conscious and whining?? : )

[freebirdmac]

The way I deal with it is I don't go. I don't go out to lunch even if it's for some big deal. When we have our yearly cookout and Christmas potluck, I stay away. It's just not worth answering the same questions over and over. They know I have food issues and that is why I am not there. I'm happy, they're understanding, so it all works. My supervisor understands. There's other non-food related ways to build team work. Plus, the aroma of some of the food is also poisonous to me.

[thepowerwithin]

The way I deal with it is I don't go. I don't go out to lunch even if it's for some big deal. When we have our yearly cookout and Christmas potluck, I stay away. It's just not worth answering the same questions over and over. They know I have food issues and that is why I am not there. I'm happy, they're understanding, so it all works. My supervisor understands. There's other non-food related ways to build team work. Plus, the aroma of some of the food is also poisonous to me.

About 6 years ago, I was transferred to my home office from my office office. Best thing that ever happened for my diet!! Those people celebrate every. little. thing. with ice cream and/or cake or both.

I live about 5 min from my office office, but often decline offers to attend not-essential-to-my-job functions/celebrations. I don't have food allergies, but for cripes sake I don't want to eat cake and ice cream 3 times a week and I don't want to get labeled an alien because I don't, lol.

[NatK]

This is how I deal too. Except I am at a new job, people don't really know me, but they know that I eat healthy. I say no to their treats, I don't do potluck, I avoid staff meals. It works for me, although they probably think that I am not wanting to be part if the team, but who cares?

The way I deal with it is I don't go. I don't go out to lunch even if it's for some big deal. When we have our yearly cookout and Christmas potluck, I stay away. It's just not worth answering the same questions over and over. They know I have food issues and that is why I am not there. I'm happy, they're understanding, so it all works. My supervisor understands. There's other non-food related ways to build team work. Plus, the aroma of some of the food is also poisonous to me.

[Babyghanoosh]

The way I deal with it is I don't go. I don't go out to lunch even if it's for some big deal. When we have our yearly cookout and Christmas potluck, I stay away. It's just not worth answering the same questions over and over. They know I have food issues and that is why I am not there. I'm happy, they're understanding, so it all works. My supervisor understands. There's other non-food related ways to build team work. Plus, the aroma of some of the food is also poisonous to me.

I think this is probably the best way to deal with it but it's hard because you are looked at negatively if you are not a team player and this includes EVERYTHING! We have a lot of events and it is usually a dinner and sometimes you are chosen to work the event without a choice. I try to eat beforehand but sometimes I can't because the event starts at 4pm and the dinner starts at 7pm and you have to stay. So, I am not always able to bow out of everything.

When I was just gluten intolerant, I told the event planner and she made it a point to get me a gluten-free meal. Now that I am also intolerant to eggs and dairy, it's a little harder.

Today, someone brought in candy and offered me some which I politely declined. He says sure you can and I again say no thanks and he asks why. Before I could even answer, my coworker says, "Don't ask" and makes a face. ugh...

[freebirdmac]

I think this is probably the best way to deal with it but it's hard because you are looked at negatively if you are not a team player and this includes EVERYTHING! We have a lot of events and it is usually a dinner and sometimes you are chosen to work the event without a choice. I try to eat beforehand but sometimes I can't because the event starts at 4pm and the dinner starts at 7pm and you have to stay. So, I am not always able to bow out of everything.

When I was just gluten intolerant, I told the event planner and she made it a point to get me a gluten-free meal. Now that I am also intolerant to eggs and dairy, it's a little harder.

Today, someone brought in candy and offered me some which I politely declined. He says sure you can and I again say no thanks and he asks why. Before I could even answer, my coworker says, "Don't ask" and makes a face. ugh...

You can't avoid in all lines of work. Which is easiest. If you can't avoid then you have to put a smile on your face and don't let anything bother you. To put people at ease I always tell them that it doesn't bother me to have others eat what I can't in front of me. That's part of their discomfort. They feel bad. By putting them at ease it makes everything easier. Even if others make faces or says ugh, keep smiling. Truthfully, I have a lot of people at work wishing they had my problem as it pretty much guarantees never being fat

[Madi-J]

you are looked at negatively if you are not a team player

Totally know this feel... I play roller derby, and if any of you know derby players, you know that A LOT of them are pretty heavy drinkers (at least 90% of the ones I know are...). I quit drinking back in January, and thus don't go to any more events than I am required to, and usually skip the random get-togethers because they're all at bars and everyone is drinking and eating bad food the whole time. Lately, I'm being accused more and more of not being a part of my team, even though I always make my practice and event requirements.... Apparently, not being a partier anymore means that I'm a bad teammate. It sucks.

[itsagoodday]

When I was just gluten intolerant, I told the event planner and she made it a point to get me a gluten-free meal. Now that I am also intolerant to eggs and dairy, it's a little harder.

That's a LOT harder, actually I'm celiac, so no gluten for me, and also cannot have eggs and dairy. I'm very sensitive to cross-contamination, so eating out or at special events is hard to the point of being impossible. I know some of these have already been mentioned, but I always look at these as my range of options for any event:

- Don't attend
- Eat before & after
- Bring your own food and eat it with the others (requires explanations)
- Bring your own food, excuse yourself or quietly disappear, and eat in the car (feels stupid, but requires no explanations)

And if anyone says anything to you about not eating or bringing your own food... what's worked best for me is to laugh it off. Smile and say something like 'oh my goodness, it would really ruin the party if we had to call an ambulance for me, hahaha!' People don't understand the difference between allergies and intolerances. Technically, most of the possible reactions I'd get are not immediate, but sometimes it pays to play it up a little more like an immediate type of allergic reaction. Anything to shut people up and get on with life, really.

[Adore]

I feel ya.

My girlfriend's mom loves cooking and i'm invited over all the time. It's hard to not indulge in some of the plates she makes. Like other have said before me, I try to eat before going- this allows me to be 'full' without having to search for an alternative. Usually I nibble on a few of her creations, which I see fine since I usually hit all my protein/calories/carbs throughout the day.

Keep sticking it out and eat clean! It's worth the lifestyle that we aim for (:

[Babyghanoosh]

You can't avoid in all lines of work. Which is easiest. If you can't avoid then you have to put a smile on your face and don't let anything bother you. To put people at ease I always tell them that it doesn't bother me to have others eat what I can't in front of me. That's part of their discomfort. They feel bad. By putting them at ease it makes everything easier. Even if others make faces or says ugh, keep smiling. Truthfully, I have a lot of people at work wishing they had my problem as it pretty much guarantees never being fat

Thanks Freebirdmac. I think you are right about people feeling bad. I really like a lot of people I work with and I can tell it makes them feel uncomfortable when they see me not eating at the get-togethers. I am going to refrain from attending when it seems okay to do so and when I do have to go, I will just smile and not let it bother me. In the long run, I need to worry about myself and my health and not what other people think.

Thanks everyone else for their suggestions too! I appreciate it.

Today at lunch time, they are having a big Cinco de Mayo party and I am just not going to attend this one.

[Wolfmother22]

Thanks Freebirdmac. I think you are right about people feeling bad. I really like a lot of people I work with and I can tell it makes them feel uncomfortable when they see me not eating at the get-togethers. I am going to refrain from attending when it seems okay to do so and when I do have to go, I will just smile and not let it bother me. In the long run, I need to worry about myself and my health and not what other people think.

Thanks everyone else for their suggestions too! I appreciate it.

Today at lunch time, they are having a big Cinco de Mayo party and I am just not going to attend this one.

Don't let it get you down or make you feel left out!! I have celiac and can't even have a speck of gluten (dr's orders) so eating the food at social gatherings is definitely not an option. It sucks big time, as you know firsthand. What I do is make something special for myself to bring and eat it there while everyone else eats. I think what makes others uncomfortable is our own visible discomfort, so if I'm happy hanging out with friends/coworkers eating something delicious, everyone has a good time. Plus, these events are supposed to be more about the people than the food, which I always try to remind myself.

Make yourself some yummy chicken and bean burritos with corn tortillas and dairy free cheese to bring, with a delicious fruit salad for dessert! :-)