never understood these two pieces of advice people give to foreveraloners...

[LaDonnaMF]

go away if you will not be receptive to suggestions/advice from non-foreveralone virgins. Ugly people get laid too.

[b0yer2]

When you focus on yourself you put yourself in a better position. When you do the things you love and find happiness and validation through yourself, then you will be confident and get girls. You cannot have a successful relationship unless you are happy with yourself and are happy on your own.

You should focus on yourself and improve the things you can control which is how hard you work with school/work/bodybuilding/etc. You cannot control what girls thing of you or if they want to be with you, you can only be happy and confident in who you are. Once you get that girls will follow.

If you do not focus on girls or focus on getting validation through women, then they will come to you. It sounds weird, but its true.

[jayohthatman]

go away if you will not be receptive to suggestions/advice from non-foreveralone virgins. Ugly people get laid too.

well yea its not like this place gives good advice,but its the only place I know. the suggestions/advice i often get on here isnt compatible with what happens IRL, so why should I be receptive to it

[jayohthatman]

When you focus on yourself you put yourself in a better position. When you do the things you love and find happiness and validation through yourself, then you will be confident and get girls. You cannot have a successful relationship unless you are happy with yourself and are happy on your own.

You should focus on yourself and improve the things you can control which is how hard you work with school/work/bodybuilding/etc. You cannot control what girls thing of you or if they want to be with you, you can only be happy and confident in who you are. Once you get that girls will follow.

If you do not focus on girls or focus on getting validation through women, then they will come to you. It sounds weird, but its true.

but this isnt working. thats what I did for 20 yrs and now im 21+ forveralone. girls didnt come,. I feel like if I continue with the " do me" attitude it will never happen.

I was so caught up in my own sh*it that I only realized i was foreveralone last fall. according to your theory, some chick should have come out of the wood work when I was doing my own thing. never happened. the thing is, I feel like you are right for most people, so the only reason I can think of that it didnt work for me is aesthetics. girls wont start mirin if theres not some basic physical attraction. I just dont know how to overcome that

[Snax56]

but this isnt working. thats what I did for 20 yrs and now im 21+ forveralone. girls didnt come,. I feel like if I continue with the " do me" attitude it will never happen.

I was so caught up in my own sh*it that I only realized i was foreveralone last fall. according to your theory, some chick should have come out of the wood work when I was doing my own thing. never happened. the thing is, I feel like you are right for most people, so the only reason I can think of that it didnt work for me is aesthetics. girls wont start mirin if theres not some basic physical attraction. I just dont know how to overcome that

Girls probably are mirin, you just don't notice. Believe me, I was like this too. Girls would look at me and I would dart my eyes to the floor. Then I would look back and they would be like, what the hell is he looking at (probably) and I would never go and talk to them. If a girl smacked me in the face with a ton of bricks in HS I would have probably been like, oh hey sorry my face got in the way and kept on walking. I just assumed I was uggz, which isn't the case, I was probably the most aesthetic in HS.

Lettuce be cereal, you need to assume every girl is mirin, and talk to them. Unless you get SUPER lucky, no girl in daily life is gonna come up to you and be like PLEASE FUK ME, especially if she knows you as a FA already. You need to have the balls to go up to HER and slowly build attraction. When you can tell there's mutual attaction there, smash time.

[jayohthatman]

Girls probably are mirin, you just don't notice. Believe me, I was like this too. Girls would look at me and I would dart my eyes to the floor. Then I would look back and they would be like, what the hell is he looking at (probably) and I would never go and talk to them. If a girl smacked me in the face with a ton of bricks in HS I would have probably been like, oh hey sorry my face got in the way and kept on walking. I just assumed I was uggz, which isn't the case, I was probably the most aesthetic in HS.

Lettuce be cereal, you need to assume every girl is mirin, and talk to them. Unless you get SUPER lucky, no girl in daily life is gonna come up to you and be like PLEASE FUK ME, especially if she knows you as a FA already. You need to have the balls to go up to HER and slowly build attraction. When you can tell there's mutual attaction there, smash time.

I highly doubt it man. sounds like you used to get eye fuked and never even noticed. I would definitely notice if it was happening to me. Thats why I have a hard time buying into the theory, at least for myself. you said it yourself you were the most aesthetic in HS, no kidding girls will mire you from afar. im FAR from aesthetic let alone one the most, dont think it will work for me. if I act like I dont care girls barely even look at me.

[Fairfax]

"stop focusing on girls and do things that you love and for yourself"

I think this is basically good advice because it seems to me the underlying issue with most posters wanting advice about getting girls in general or one girl in particular is a lack of self-knowledge and self-understanding, a lack of awareness and understanding of other people, and an as yet under-developed ability to express oneself and communicate fluently, things which can only come with time. It's about maturing as an individual and developing as a person, hence the advice OP is referring to.

All the posts advising people to use this or that bit of 'game', this or that technique or strategy or tactic, opening this way, escalating that way, closing another way, etc etc - whilst well-intentioned and maybe even helpful for some - are IMO beside the point. By focusing on whatever helps you grow and evolve, you'll eventually find that when you meet people you fancy, you won't have any questions, you'll know what to do, and whatever will be, will be. I didn't have much of a clue when I was 19 or 20 either, which isn't really surprising - I might've been alive for 20 years but I'd only actually been an adult for a year or two, a mere matter of months. Not sure I'm an adult yet lol. So, desperately frustrating as it may seem - and believe me, I know that feel - I think that to focus on yourself, and give it time, is about the best advice you're gonna get from strangers on the internet.

[b0yer2]

but this isnt working. thats what I did for 20 yrs and now im 21+ forveralone. girls didnt come,. I feel like if I continue with the " do me" attitude it will never happen.

I was so caught up in my own sh*it that I only realized i was foreveralone last fall. according to your theory, some chick should have come out of the wood work when I was doing my own thing. never happened. the thing is, I feel like you are right for most people, so the only reason I can think of that it didnt work for me is aesthetics. girls wont start mirin if theres not some basic physical attraction. I just dont know how to overcome that

Then what is your problem? If you have your **** together and are happy with who you are, when you go out to bars and clubs with your buddies nad their mutual friends you will meet girls. When you do just be a nice, funny, and a bit cocky guy and you will get girls no problem.

And don't tell me "i did that and it didn't work" because we have all been in your situation and we manned up and got out of it. Sitting at home feeling sorry for yourself will get you nowhere in life. Calling yourself a foreveralone will get you no friends or no girls. So shut up with this foreveralone bull****. Being a social person is not rocket science. Go out and have fun and treat people the way you want to be treated and things will fall into place.

You also need to learn to relax. Just because you don't have a girl doesn't mean you are forever alone. You have your family and friends and that is all you need. It's not a big deal that you have been single for however long its been. Even the most socially awkward guys find girls and girlfriends if they apply themselves. So sack up and get out there, but makes sure you have your **** together and don;t worry if you don't get a girl.

EDIT- Saw you are 21. Dude go out to bars with your boys. Girls will check you out and when they do smile. Have fun with your boys. If you do not get a girl its not a big deal, just have fun with your buddies. The goal of the night is not to get a girl, but to have fun with your boys. When you are having fun and not worrying about girls, that is when they will come.

[endofdays89]

but this isnt working. thats what I did for 20 yrs and now im 21+ forveralone. girls didnt come,. I feel like if I continue with the " do me" attitude it will never happen.

I was so caught up in my own sh*it that I only realized i was foreveralone last fall. according to your theory, some chick should have come out of the wood work when I was doing my own thing. never happened. the thing is, I feel like you are right for most people, so the only reason I can think of that it didnt work for me is aesthetics. girls wont start mirin if theres not some basic physical attraction. I just dont know how to overcome that

haha same here, brb always enjoying being by myself, did not give a **** to talk to anyone, working on my car and lifting. Then all of a sudden about a year ago it hit me i am a huge loser incapable of making friends and non existent to my town. This feeling grows deeper every day i don't care about anything anymore other than having some kind of a social life

[Guardian]

"once you are happy with yourself, girls will be attracted to you"

srsly? If someone can clear this up that would be great but personally it seems like broscience to me. In fact, I would go as far as to say, no girl cares about your accomplishments or what is happening in your life since everyone is to busy worrying about themselves.

This is where you are wrong and likely a big part of your issues.

Maybe girls you are right, but WOMEN care alot about accomplisments and your life, its what gives you value, at least for relationships.

The reason people give the advice you stated is that if you seek happiness in others than the nature of the relationship is you using them as a source of your happiness. If on the other hand you are happy yourself, the nature of all relationships is you expressing your own happiness, and people will want to be near you.

Remember
Peace comes from within. Do not seek it without.
Buddha

[SumblimeStyle]

"stop focusing on girls and do things that you love and for yourself"

How exactly will disregarding girls help foreveraloners? I have been given this advice plenty of times along with many other foreveralones, and someone like me who is turning 21 this year and never even come close to kissing a girl before how exactly will this mindset change anything? Add to the fact I follow a good diet, and workout consistently my test levels are higher than the average person so of course I am going to have girls on my mind constantly, you can't avoid it. Also add to the fact that majority of people who give this advice to foreveraloners are naturals with girls and can get them whenever they want, so I highly doubt if they were incapable of having success with girls they would have the same mindset.

I honestly feel the only thing missing in my life at this point is a girl who is interested in me, I am happy with my bodybuilding accomplishments, I am happy with my part-time job, I am happy with my current education. Basically i feel everything else is there and yet shockingly I do not see myself ever having a girl in my life, which is something else I do not understand and brings me to the second piece of advice people give foreveralones..

A good example: I love staying active and I love sports, I remember playing recreationaly hockey and baseball in my high school days along with cross country did that help me get anywere with girls? No. However, I was very happy to be involved in team sports and doing something apart from just simply playing video games. It still got pretty annoying since I could not relate to my teammates since they were talking about girls often and of course me being foreveralone.jpg I just had to be quiet most of the time. Bodybuilding also, guys respect me both at work and at the gym, do girls give a fuk? Hell no.


"once you are happy with yourself, girls will be attracted to you"

srsly? If someone can clear this up that would be great but personally it seems like broscience to me. In fact, I would go as far as to say, no girl cares about your accomplishments or what is happening in your life since everyone is to busy worrying about themselves. I remember in my first year of uni I was confident (a bit more back then than I am know) and it kind of repelled girls away from me if anything. It just feels no matter what I say or do to reference a sports term: "I am always the benchwarmer". Meaning me and many foreveralones, it just feels girls will not give me the time of day and pick any other guys before me. Perfect example: Was taking a summer class and tried hitting on this cute girl sitting next to me, she kind of seemed nice and wanted to play along in the convo, but as soon as another guy joined in she would not even look at me anymore and just felt disgusted when I kept talking to her.

Me personally, I always have confident body language at school or at work, yet even my part-time job all the girl cashiers don't even want to talk to me even if i initiate convos with them, yet I see them chasing after 140 lb *******s at my work and constantly talking to them when they are on their breaks. Yes, I know I come of as a negative ******* on here but that is only because I let my problems out on this forum I do not act like this IRL..

post a face pic and i'll tell you what your problem is.

Edit: If you have admitted yourself that you're a 1/10 facially, you should lower your standards. Don't expect to be banging 7s, realistically shoot for 4s.

[foreverascone]

our biological purpose is to reproduce you can't just disregard girls that easily unless ur sex drive is really low..

Go pay a prostitute and f*ck the sh*t out of her. "Biological purpose" fulfilled, *******.

[adoniscomplex]

So are some of you guys still virgins because you aren't good looking enough to bang 7's but not willing to 4's ?

[Snax56]

I highly doubt it man. sounds like you used to get eye fuked and never even noticed. I would definitely notice if it was happening to me. Thats why I have a hard time buying into the theory, at least for myself. you said it yourself you were the most aesthetic in HS, no kidding girls will mire you from afar. im FAR from aesthetic let alone one the most, dont think it will work for me. if I act like I dont care girls barely even look at me.

Ever hear of a self fulfilling prophecy? If you believe you're far from aesthetic then you probably will be seen that way. And if you truly aren't then hit the gym. I used to be well over 300lbs but I manned up, put down the McDonald's and got on the treadmill on myself and it really does work for confidence, 100% cereal. Maybe you think your height is the problem? Hit on the little girls, I envy you for that, little girls are scared off by how much bigger I am then them.

haha same here, brb always enjoying being by myself, did not give a **** to talk to anyone, working on my car and lifting. Then all of a sudden about a year ago it hit me i am a huge loser incapable of making friends and non existent to my town. This feeling grows deeper every day i don't care about anything anymore other than having some kind of a social life

So then move to a different town? I recognized when it was time to either wallow in my own self loathing or move on and make something more of my life. I did the latter and now I'm quite happy I did. YOLO, make the most of it. Way easier to start fresh than to white out the entire page and start scribbling again, nomsayin?

[adoniscomplex]

A bit of advice on how you should
Be disregarding girls. When you see a girl who sparks you're interest flirt her up but when you go home don't make yourself unbearable pining over her or girls in general. Don't act like she's all you have going on that will only push her away

[jayohthatman]

Ever hear of a self fulfilling prophecy? If you believe you're far from aesthetic then you probably will be seen that way. And if you truly aren't then hit the gym. I used to be well over 300lbs but I manned up, put down the McDonald's and got on the treadmill on myself and it really does work for confidence, 100% cereal. Maybe you think your height is the problem? Hit on the little girls, I envy you for that, little girls are scared off by how much bigger I am then them.

lol great job getting yourself in shape, but im not fat. I lift and am pretty athletic, I play soccer. And yes I think my height is the problem and my lack of facial aesthetics doesnt help.

the thing is, at my school there arent actually many smaller girls srs. The few that there are automatically think im some desperate fuk when I talk to them cause they know I dont meet the height requirement for most other girls. hell i dont even meet the requirement for some of the shorter girls either, they really care about height/looks.

its just frustrating, cause I feel like most miscers dont truly know what its like to be unattractive. Most of you are in shape average looking white guys, which is much better than what I'm working with. and no, its not a self-fulfilling prophecy, because I only started to think I might be ugly AFTER I realized im a total failure with women despite being an overall normal person like my most of my friends who do fine with girls

[SeeOtter]

I still play Pokemon and I get girls. What the hell are you doing to repel them?

[Snax56]

lol great job getting yourself in shape, but im not fat. I lift and am pretty athletic, I play soccer. And yes I think my height is the problem and my lack of facial aesthetics doesnt help.

the thing is, at my school there arent actually many smaller girls srs. The few that there are automatically think im some desperate fuk when I talk to them cause they know I dont meet the height requirement for most other girls. hell i dont even meet the requirement for some of the shorter girls either, they really care about height/looks.

its just frustrating, cause I feel like most miscers dont truly know what its like to be unattractive. Most of you are in shape average looking white guys, which is much better than what I'm working with. and no, its not a self-fulfilling prophecy, because I only started to think I might be ugly AFTER I realized im a total failure with women despite being an overall normal person like my most of my friends who do fine with girls

If it's a small school, I know that feel bro. To make things worse there were wayyyy less girls than guys where I went so 6s thought they were 8s and 4s were fully convinced they were 7s and acted accordingly. So in college, I really only had one girlfriend (long tem) and that was it. I had real high social status too, but low confidence. I lucked into one girl, thats all, and I'm tall and fairly aesthetic (much more so now, but still). I know what you mean by frustrating, and word gets around so quickly in a small school. If it's a big school, I can't even fathom the possibilities/know nothing about that except from what I've heard, and that that you can walk around never seeing the same person twice.

Only thing I can say is once you get older (I've only been out one year, I still see it), all that superficial bullsht becomes less important and girls look way more at how together you life is. That's also the reason I go for women who are older than me, way more mature, I'm done with little girls.

[jayohthatman]

If it's a small school, I know that feel bro. To make things worse there were wayyyy less girls than guys where I went so 6s thought they were 8s and 4s were fully convinced they were 7s and acted accordingly. So in college, I really only had one girlfriend (long tem) and that was it. I had real high social status too, but low confidence. I lucked into one girl, thats all, and I'm tall and fairly aesthetic (much more so now, but still). I know what you mean by frustrating, and word gets around so quickly in a small school. If it's a big school, I can't even fathom the possibilities/know nothing about that except from what I've heard, and that that you can walk around never seeing the same person twice.

Only thing I can say is once you get older (I've only been out one year, I still see it), all that superficial bullsht becomes less important and girls look way more at how together you life is. That's also the reason I go for women who are older than me, way more mature, I'm done with little girls.

thats exactly it brah. every girl here has an inflated view of their own attractiveness, I think its because its a school full of high achievers/ esteemers(ivy). 5's are as selective as 8's would be IRL. I hope you are right that things change when you get older...............I just hope I dont grow so bitter as to push away or miss the one chick that will probably come along at some point. I already kind of resent/hate women lol.

[hai2dehfolks]

here's some advice, OP, that I hope you disregard:


DON'T go curl into a ball and disappear into nothing.













nomsayin?

[revolutionbrah]

When you focus on yourself you put yourself in a better position. When you do the things you love and find happiness and validation through yourself, then you will be confident and get girls. You cannot have a successful relationship unless you are happy with yourself and are happy on your own.

You should focus on yourself and improve the things you can control which is how hard you work with school/work/bodybuilding/etc. You cannot control what girls thing of you or if they want to be with you, you can only be happy and confident in who you are. Once you get that girls will follow.

If you do not focus on girls or focus on getting validation through women, then they will come to you. It sounds weird, but its true.

the op pretty much disproves this point.. I am HAPPPY WITH MY SCHOOL/WORK/BODYBUILDING but the girls are not following, strongbroscience/10. I have not started focusing on girls until recently but I never got them before so that statement is also wrong. The happiness stuff is full of ****, I have a cousin who was suicidal and depressed and yet, he still had a girlfriend during that time. How do u explain that?

[revolutionbrah]

go away if you will not be receptive to suggestions/advice from non-foreveralone virgins. Ugly people get laid too.

I never made this thread seeking suggestions, because I already know their is no hoppe for me. It was mainly ust venting about some points which people advise foreveraloners which do not work.

[revolutionbrah]

Ever hear of a self fulfilling prophecy? If you believe you're far from aesthetic then you probably will be seen that way. And if you truly aren't then hit the gym. I used to be well over 300lbs but I manned up, put down the McDonald's and got on the treadmill on myself and it really does work for confidence, 100% cereal. Maybe you think your height is the problem? Hit on the little girls, I envy you for that, little girls are scared off by how much bigger I am then them.

ah more broscience lol,

I am 220lbs with visible abs but no girls care, before when i was a skinny ******* i got more attention from girls than I do know.

[revolutionbrah]

post a face pic and i'll tell you what your problem is.

Edit: If you have admitted yourself that you're a 1/10 facially, you should lower your standards. Don't expect to be banging 7s, realistically shoot for 4s.

uglyasfukgenetics/10 cuz

lulz 4/10? In my dreams..

[foreverascone]

uglyasfukgenetics/10 cuz

lulz 4/10? In my dreams..

You look like you just cried. Most people are ugly as f*ck when they cry. I'd like to see a happier picture of you.

[HeBrewHammah]

self esteem is the problem. great, youre happy with work/gym/class...thats the only thing missing form this equation.

So, honestly how is it? when you look in the mirror what do you see? Do you mire yourself and be like "damn i'm a sexy azz betch" lol. I do. haha.

But in all honesty here REVBRAH, if you feel good about yourself and are comfortable in your body...ppl will take notice, i dont know one single person who likes someone who feels bad or misfortunate for what they have been given. you can't change things too drastically now, there is no choice but be grateful for what you do have, your health and family and friends dude. srs.

women pick up on when your faking the funk. They're not all dumb. it can only hold you over temporarily.


also, on your response to LaDonna...chit does work. Again, if you're truly happy with yourself like you claim...it would all make sense.

[guvanata2]

[IMG]http://i42.tinypic.com/20a4arb.jpg[/IG]

uglyasfukgenetics/10 cuz

lulz 4/10? In my dreams..

Shave the hair. You don't look good with the wings/curly hair. Do something about the acne -> use acne facial wash. Try not to look so defeated. Harden your resolve my friend. Once you do those things you would be a 4-5/10. You won't be banging 7-9/10s just like I won't be, but you would have a very good chance with 5-6/10 girls. Also you are 5'9" at least you have height. You don't know what its like being an Asian manlet with weird facial aesthetics like mine. I'm not even looking to hook up with chicks anymore. I'm saving my money for some high quality STD free escorts that are porn-star level of attractiveness. It costs less money and time and energy overall to go the escort route vs. chasing after stuck up bitches.

Also be grateful for your health and that you don't have chronic allergic rhinitis/sinusitis and chronic rhinitis like me. It even destroyed my dreams of doing AFROTC and going in as an officer. Seriously be graeful for your health.

[endofdays89]

uglyasfukgenetics/10 cuz

lulz 4/10? In my dreams..

Strong ass bulk man you look totally different than you did a few months ago.

[Legend1617]

go away if you will not be receptive to suggestions/advice from non-foreveralone virgins. Ugly people get laid too.

not if they lack confidence due to there lack of aesthetics or they are scared to death of relationships & sex in general..just saying that's only a few probs you should see how they react when they find out you can't drive..some say awww bless your heart,some say d*mn that sucks brah & some just say eww creep gtf away from me..I am sure many forveraloners have tried about everything other than what Jamestown say's (just approach them start feeling them up & see if they are DTF if not disregard,troll them for the lolz & move onto the next or what some say just whip your cawk out & see what happens..Idk if it's different over seas but here in the USA you can get charged for that sh*t.Jamestown gives some pretty good advice imo but sometimes takes it to far & it only works if you have aesthetics & if you have the mindset to phuck random girls instead of trying to get into a relationship

[TallDH]

I'm not going to argue with your post as it has quite a bit of truth to it. I've personally had flings in the past few months with an 8/10 and 10/10 who thought I was hot....never lasted, but generated initial attraction. Simply based on my experiences, there is more to it. Besides, its more pathetic to lower standards to something you aren't happy with. I'd bet most of the guys who are banging all of these girls are taking easy, std infested slooty bishes, not my cup of tea.

I won't lie, I've bagged three fatties in my lifetime. I'd rather just masturbate as thinking back on those experiences makes me literally gag. I'm not talking ginormous whales but chicks that were 5'5" and roughly 180lbs. Testosterone does f*cked up things to a man's brain. I've also paid two or three times. Don't see the big deal, you're paying her to leave.

All the rest have been clean and decent to hot and no STDs here. What's wrong with slutty bitches? It is better than masturbating. Sex is sex, quit making a big deal about it.

One thing you guys have to realize is that women are a helluva lot more insecure than any man can begin to think about. They can also pick up on your insecurities. Even more so when you've got a f*ck my life attitude towards everything. I've had a lot of girls with banging bods not want to f*ck with the lights on because of some little blemish on the underside of their right butt cheek.

Quit being bitches about it, use your f*cking logical brain, and quit acting like a woman with your emotions. Be a man, grab your balls, and rub them on some chicks face just because you can.

Live for yourself, live for the moment, and seize the day, everyday. Take it from me, being so depressed that you get to the point of sticking a gun in your mouth is NOT the way to be.

Anyway, both the OP and short stuff have gotten great information in this thread and in past threads. Use it or don't. If you don't that means two fewer guys in the competition pool and more women for me.

EDIT: Oh yeah, one more thing. I had to move back in with my mother and father. I still pull women. I just go over to their place. I don't act like it's a big deal.