I don't know what I'm doing wrong. I never really had many friends as a kid, used to be teased a lot in both grade and middle school too, and now I'm 3 months shy of turning 25 but still have more acquaintances than actual friends to hang out.
Seldomly do go to parties when invited and drink a lot but then afterwards it's the same lifestyle. Nothing but studying (I changed my major) and only had 1 failed relationship, someone that never really saw any potential future with me but wish he would have told me in my face instead of wasting my time.
I already posted pictures, one from last year taken in April (my main profile picture) and another one from late 2010. If I'm just plain or ugly just say it. I don't think it's that either. It's something that tends to get others bored. I got told in high school several times ''Oh you're weird'', even my science teacher once made me read a short story. When I finished it, he told if I understood it. I said yes ''Yes the kid in the story is different from everyone '', in which he replied ''Exactly my point, he is you in a way''. It must be for a reason but I don't know what I'm doing wrong.
Thread: Why do people get bored with me?
01-10-2012, 02:53 PM #1
Why do people get bored with me?
01-10-2012, 02:55 PM #2
01-10-2012, 02:57 PM #3
I had a previous account here but I never came back with it again. I was doing good and someone all of the sudden didn't like my opinion and it's like I was the worst of worst all of the sudden. So I disappeared and started just going to other forums.
01-10-2012, 03:00 PM #4
01-10-2012, 03:05 PM #5
Actually two guys did once hit on me (one after my graduation and the other about 3 yrs ago) but both were losers. I must be doing something wrong. It's either I don't get hit on or I do but it's the wrong guys.
01-10-2012, 03:11 PM #6
Well, therein lies your problem. A guy [in general] doesn't want to see a girl that reminds him of himself. Girls pretty up themselves for guys, and Guys "try" to do the same for girls. It's just, how society works. First off, I would suggest fixing the face: Smile. A little upbeat/cheer goes a long way. Second, switch it up. Guys and Gals [in general] like a change rather than the same old Vanilla...and usually when there isn't enough change, one party in the relationship decides to cheat. Third, think about what you like, and find others who like that. Fourth, do what you like.
01-10-2012, 03:27 PM #7
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01-10-2012, 03:28 PM #8
01-10-2012, 03:32 PM #9
Ok thanks for making it clear.
01-10-2012, 03:59 PM #10
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Looked at picture. You look average.
If you want more acquaintances go make more acquaintances. It's that easy. Join clubs, take up classes, find hobbies, hang out with other people.
If you want more real friends though I can't help you because finding a real friend is hard as ****. Start with acquaintances.~ Never Having Kids So Can Save Up For a 4K TV and a PLP Computer Setup Crew ~
01-10-2012, 04:07 PM #11
The only friend I could think of (even though I don't consider her best friend but is a good friend) is my childhood friend Gretchen who I always gotten along with. The other few friends I got are only ocassional friends and then the other are just acquaintances, nothing else.
Besides finishing my carreer and optaining a degree, I want a childless marriage (no kids, just a husband).
01-10-2012, 07:24 PM #12
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01-10-2012, 07:30 PM #13
Somewhere either on another site or elsewhere, I heard we (in general) have long developed perfect conversation skills from an early age. I guess I must be on the end of the gene pool. I can't imagine what was my ex thinking those times where it got silent and he restarted the conversation again. I get the feeling he wanted to break up at some point because when I broke it off, he said something like ''I waited for you to break it off, I love you but.... blah,blah...and more bs''. That's worst.... someone not letting you go out of pity. I didn't needed that. I preferred someone to be straight-forward, not a coward.
If there was a program to develop more social skills (not sure if there are in my country... right now I'm in Peru) and depending on the price, I would assist in every single class. I'm not shy nor afraid of what to say (not anymore) but just at times can't keep up the conversation and don't really know what else to say. Not even getting drunk helps out, that only makes me even more quiet.
Last edited by VanillaSky87; 01-10-2012 at 08:05 PM.
01-10-2012, 08:14 PM #14
01-10-2012, 08:17 PM #15
The pity came from your silence. Due to him keeping on insisting/trying conversations, I envy him. Pity of your silence? Maybe. I think he just wanted to open you up, and finally decided it was hopeless for him. You may want him to be straight-forward, but how can he do so if you're so withdrawn? When someone is withdrawn, people view them as fragile. So, him not being straight-forward was due to your miscommunication of feelings.
We're just men, not mind-readers."There is no 1-Way-Answers-All. There is no easy route. There is no guaranteed method. There are only tips to be given, and lessons to be learned. That is how you progress: via failure. Fail now to succeed later."
01-10-2012, 08:35 PM #16
I guess it's true... even if we move on, something is still there that somehow refuses to be forgotten.
Last edited by VanillaSky87; 01-10-2012 at 08:41 PM.
01-10-2012, 08:43 PM #17
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01-10-2012, 08:49 PM #18
01-10-2012, 08:54 PM #19
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01-10-2012, 09:34 PM #20
Last edited by VanillaSky87; 01-10-2012 at 09:42 PM.
01-10-2012, 09:36 PM #21
You sound very needy which is a very huge turn off. Its like, if you got so much going on, why would you need a man? You got a vagina so, just on that fact alone, your going to have options. You could focus on yourself and the things that really matter in life. Date when you feel it is right. Also, get out as much as possible, and you will meet people. Its not the 1950s. You can ask guys out or extend invites too.
01-10-2012, 09:50 PM #22
01-10-2012, 10:03 PM #23
If I am honest, I may have been distant, and that pushes unity away. Then again, she brought up marriage, having a family, and kids. Sharing similar beliefs, politics, and other common interests. Still, it was too much. Well, having your vagina stretched out of shape, and squeezing out a child is probably not what most women are thrilled to do. For many men, no heir is a deal breaker, and yet, some are okay with no kids.
The **** you mean you don't like rejection? Cause men do? Despite looks, I don't get every girl I hit on, and notasingle****isgiven.jpg. Its funny cause, girls are getting the chance to work, to have a career, and be promiscuous. Burn your brahs and **** like a champ but,
are had at these women when they come @ me with wanting marriage or kids. You happen to be the opposite of these types of girls and women. Still, wanting to be in a relationship, and really needy is a huge turn off. More so if you are a man but, it can come off as being desperate, and not having things going for yourself. Like, you are more then capable of doing your own thing, living your own life, and not needing a man to support you. Its fine you want this but, some men may get the impression you will jump at anything that comes your way, and even though they may or may have liked you, may hit the brakes just cause.
You will have a bf eventually but, you should enjoy being single, and like myself, when you least expect it, you will meet someone awesome. Leave the past in the past, give guys a fair chance despite previous guys you have dated or chose, and just learn to not take it personal. Soak up the lessons from the experiences and avoid repeating the past. Good luck!
01-10-2012, 10:06 PM #24
01-10-2012, 10:18 PM #25
OP out of curiosity, what is your background? The relevance to this sort of goes back to the girl i was seeing. She was not born in America, came over very young, and yet, she is now a very Americanized woman. Promiscuity is built into our country here in America, women emulate Kim Kardashian and Snooky off Jersey Shore. They see movies like the slut from the note book that runs off and ****s a ex cheating on her fiance or some phaggot who is content with his gf cheating multiple times with different men. In her country, had she been caught of promiscuity, she would have been put in a white sheet, put in the ground, and stoned publically for her behavior. In a sense, we are all a product of our environment, and responsible for our decision making. Obviously, stoning is barbaric, and inhuman but, American women are out of control, and very few are worthy of marriage and children. Not all are whores just most of them just are not able to handle it or are deserving.
Women from a young age are taught that, this is what they want, and learn quickly after they get it, they are still unhappy, and want out. In America, there out yields alimony, money that is not theirs, and any intelligent male would know, its not the smartest business proposal, and as a young man, neither is a committed relationship. I have met lots of girls in my life, hooked up, and been quite barbaric myself. Very select few were worthy of a relationship, of something more, and while this may come off as hypocrtical only if we did not live under a feminine legal system. A miscer by user name NVRSTOPWORKING called me out to post a video where a American woman came at a guy for being divorce and went on a big speech about being a independent woman, strong, and not needing a man. She was later contradicted when he came back to call her out for taking alimony. This is what the misc refers to female logic. You may embody feminine qualities, marriage qualities, and traits but, men today are going to be skepticle of women cause of the stories, and experiences. Then again, we are all responsible for our deicison making, the people we pick, and choose in our life, the decisions we make, and the ones we fail to make.
Focus on your major, on the things you want, take your chances even at the cost of rejection, and you wont regret. You will get rejected but, regret sucks and I think possibilities out weigh any form of failure.
01-10-2012, 10:51 PM #26
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its pretty simple OP your just a bookworm, you keep saying i gotta stay home and study cause im doing a 'major', u were exactly like my brother from yr 10, he hadnt stopped studying since, he is 20 now and just graduated but now he said he's going to do more, for now he's on holidays, i used to go out drink, party all the time he wouldnt, now that he is free he is drinking me under the table, if you truly want a man you have to set some time aside to go out and meet new people.
"why do people get bored with me?"
oh i duno the fact all you can talk about if your study and books, thats not the flashiest point of conversation unless you meet some guy thats doing the same thing as you wait a minute...... thats it?
DATE ANOTHER BOOKWORM
edit: OP also, you think ure ugly, so what, looks has nothing to do with like men to women, if your interesting the man will hang around, i know plenty of girls but i chase the ones that are spontaneous, bite back etc, cause it intrigues me, rather than dating this girl i know that would do anything for me, theres no interest at all...Re-born and ready to go
01-10-2012, 10:53 PM #27
OP, stop the excuses, get out as much as you can, and when you see a man you like or would like to date or see again, suggest to him, "we should hangout sometime!" See wha happens. If he is down and not a ***, he will at least give you some cawk, and you may have your relationship.
01-11-2012, 05:49 AM #28
01-11-2012, 06:08 AM #29
There used to be a lot of what is called ''machismo'' (meaning chauvinism) here many years ago but now it has decreased significantly. Ex: A man can get reported for hitting or trying to spank a wife like a child if the woman proceeds to go to the commiseria (police station) and file charges on him. One of my mother's male childhood friend got busted for that and has to appear in court for hitting his ex wife. The sender accidently send the police notification to our old apartment and basically if he doesn't show up, he's gonna have to pay a big fine.
Basically everyone can do what they want to though many people still find it weird those that don't desired either relationships or kids. So if I were in a family reunion and people start asking when if I'll have a child, I have to lie and say ''Yeah pretty soon, not now or ''I'm still too young for that''. This is similar to American but I have to say the US is slightly more open-minded and even elderly people work (over here unless you have a profession, there is an age limit to many job positions).
Last edited by VanillaSky87; 01-11-2012 at 06:16 AM.
01-11-2012, 06:46 AM #30
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