ITT: I Help Solve Your Relationship/Man or Woman Problems

[IronPuma]

must spread some around before giving it to oregonballer again

[Ryan2302]

hey bros, i need some advise.
Gf broke up with me after 2 and a half years together, this happened last Friday.
anyway i graduated from college last year and shes still there this is her final year. While I was there we did everything together but recently shes been complaining about how we hardly see each other and spend time with each other. so we had a huge fight about it and that really started this. the reason she said we broke up is tings between us have changed. I still love her alot and im having alot of trouble coping with this as it seems like she has given up and doesnt wanna work tings out and im feeling like crap.
Any advise will be appreciated.

[IrishCule]

hey bros, i need some advise.
Gf broke up with me after 2 and a half years together, this happened last Friday.
anyway i graduated from college last year and shes still there this is her final year. While I was there we did everything together but recently shes been complaining about how we hardly see each other and spend time with each other. so we had a huge fight about it and that really started this. the reason she said we broke up is tings between us have changed. I still love her alot and im having alot of trouble coping with this as it seems like she has given up and doesnt wanna work tings out and im feeling like crap.
Any advise will be appreciated.

I'm no expert but the general advice will be to move on and completely cut contact. Even if you don't want to move on and want her back the best option is probably to cut contact.


So ignore her for a while and focus on yourself.

[Ryan2302]

I'm no expert but the general advice will be to move on and completely cut contact. Even if you don't want to move on and want her back the best option is probably to cut contact.


So ignore her for a while and focus on yourself.

thanks for your advise bro.
I know thats what I should be doing but i cant stop thinking of her. I guess its because its my first serious relationship and I committed so much.
Today is the first day we haven't spoken. Tomorrow is my birthday and i'm feeling lonely lol.

[eammon88]

- Live with gf.
- She say she is getting bored.
- How does one go about keeping the relationship interesting, when you know so much about each other?
- And how can one create distance when you share a house?

[IronPuma]

hey bros, i need some advise.
Gf broke up with me after 2 and a half years together, this happened last Friday.
anyway i graduated from college last year and shes still there this is her final year. While I was there we did everything together but recently shes been complaining about how we hardly see each other and spend time with each other. so we had a huge fight about it and that really started this. the reason she said we broke up is tings between us have changed. I still love her alot and im having alot of trouble coping with this as it seems like she has given up and doesnt wanna work tings out and im feeling like crap.
Any advise will be appreciated.

i would say just move on but i'll delve deeper

women need a protector, a caregiver. its basic biology. when your not there she needs to seek out other means. thats what changed...you werent there to be her shelter. to be honest it prolly wasnt going to last anyway you two are living very different lives right now and its very hard for her to understand. move on bro and cut your ties. she might come beckoning in 3 months but i wouldnt wait around to find out

- Live with gf.
- She say she is getting bored.
- How does one go about keeping the relationship interesting, when you know so much about each other?
- And how can one create distance when you share a house?

im confused you wanna create distance but keep it interesting? please explain.

[eammon88]

Create distance so as to make her want me more. Sorry for being vague

[IronPuma]

Create distance so as to make her want me more. Sorry for being vague

shes bored and you want to create distance? shes bored because you two do the same crap day in and day out. you need to mix it up bro. this is what happens when you move in together young. you get into a rut and just keep doing the same old stuff every day. i mean you could talk to her less but i wouldnt suggest it...i mean you live together its pretty hard lol

[Ryan2302]

i would say just move on but i'll delve deeper

women need a protector, a caregiver. its basic biology. when your not there she needs to seek out other means. thats what changed...you werent there to be her shelter. to be honest it prolly wasnt going to last anyway you two are living very different lives right now and its very hard for her to understand. move on bro and cut your ties. she might come beckoning in 3 months but i wouldnt wait around to find out

Thanks for the advise bro i'm doing much better now I think i'm beginning to accept things and move on, as you said " i wouldnt wait around to find out" i'm not going to.

[Rasc170]

lately i havent been feeling like myself. I'm an emotional rollercoaster and a needy lil' bitch. Im turning 32 and for the past few years family/family friends keep asking me when I'm gonna get married. I have a lot of **** going for me, but i havent met that person yet. And it's not like im not trying. I'm meeting women through female friends, online dating, EVERYTHING. I think i'm starting to feel there's something wrong with me. Anyways i've become a bit more desperate, needy, and emotional. When a woman i'm dating does something minor, it annoys me. I.E. was introduced to a solid 8 through a mutual friend and we both liked each other. But she didnt show as much interest in me. I would always initiate the calls/texts, so i just cut her loose. I dont wanna feel like this and dont know how to keep my emotions in check

[IronPuma]

lately i havent been feeling like myself. I'm an emotional rollercoaster and a needy lil' bitch. Im turning 32 and for the past few years family/family friends keep asking me when I'm gonna get married. I have a lot of **** going for me, but i havent met that person yet. And it's not like im not trying. I'm meeting women through female friends, online dating, EVERYTHING. I think i'm starting to feel there's something wrong with me. Anyways i've become a bit more desperate, needy, and emotional. When a woman i'm dating does something minor, it annoys me. I.E. was introduced to a solid 8 through a mutual friend and we both liked each other. But she didnt show as much interest in me. I would always initiate the calls/texts, so i just cut her loose. I dont wanna feel like this and dont know how to keep my emotions in check

i think alot of the problems come from your family and friends. almost as if the women you meet arent looking to satisfy those goals soon you get pissed and cut them loose. do you agree with this? i think this is simply putting a lot of unneeded pressure on you and the women are definitely picking up on it. you think an 8 wants to be around a needy little bitch? she gets approached by those guys all day. as far as keeping your emotions in check...that comes from removing the stress in your life. if that means distancing yourself from those people a little bit day by day then do that. could also be as simple as explaining to them that your just looking for the right one due to so many people around you getting divorced and you dont want to go through that. that might get them off your back. if i didnt clarify anything feel free to post here or pm me. by the way i lol'd at your sig so true.

stay safe.

[Rasc170]

i think alot of the problems come from your family and friends. almost as if the women you meet arent looking to satisfy those goals soon you get pissed and cut them loose. do you agree with this? i think this is simply putting a lot of unneeded pressure on you and the women are definitely picking up on it. you think an 8 wants to be around a needy little bitch? she gets approached by those guys all day. as far as keeping your emotions in check...that comes from removing the stress in your life. if that means distancing yourself from those people a little bit day by day then do that. could also be as simple as explaining to them that your just looking for the right one due to so many people around you getting divorced and you dont want to go through that. that might get them off your back. if i didnt clarify anything feel free to post here or pm me. by the way i lol'd at your sig so true.

stay safe.

yeah but how do i curb my desire to not be single. Used to love it in my 20s, but now i hate it.

[RobinHood]

I started a log about my romantic life. It just hit 3 pages long. First page is mainly stories from my past, but second and third is current field report and issues i have with girls. I'd love it if you can find some time to read the log and post ur thoughts on the log.

id be awesome. the thread is in my signature. if u could do that and post ur thoughts on there thatd be beyond awesome. theres lots of material in my posts and im sure you'll have lots of advice to give me about random parts here and there throughout the log. if you ever need a favor, let me know. im not sure what i can do for you, let me know

--Robinhood.

[IronPuma]

yeah but how do i curb my desire to not be single. Used to love it in my 20s, but now i hate it.

why would you want to curb it if you obviously dont want to be single? i mean if you really do i can tell you how but it just seems like you dont.

I started a log about my romantic life. It just hit 3 pages long. First page is mainly stories from my past, but second and third is current field report and issues i have with girls. I'd love it if you can find some time to read the log and post ur thoughts on the log.

id be awesome. the thread is in my signature. if u could do that and post ur thoughts on there thatd be beyond awesome. theres lots of material in my posts and im sure you'll have lots of advice to give me about random parts here and there throughout the log. if you ever need a favor, let me know. im not sure what i can do for you, let me know

--Robinhood.

My thread reaches a lot of people which im really glad about i'll surely go ahead and look for common trends and post in your thread on those. if i dont asnwer something over there or if you have something that you really want to know either pm me or post here but favors you can do me...bump this thread so i can help others. i'll start looking at your thread tonight as im busy at work and time is money.

[Rasc170]

why would you want to curb it if you obviously dont want to be single? i mean if you really do i can tell you how but it just seems like you dont.

you're absolutly right i dont wanna be single, but that doesnt mean I should NEED to be in love. I wanna curb it so I can see the women in my life for who they really are, instead of looking at them through some rose colored glasses and thinking they're perfect.

[Spartan5364]

-girl sends me some strong signals (touching, smiling, asked for my #)
-week later shoot her a few texts, ask her out, says shes busy, next time
-see her in class, she says shell text me over the weekend to hang out, sounds good right?
-didn't happen
-another week goes by, final attempt from me to ask her out, shes busy
-later in school shes all touching my arm, asking how my weekend was and ****, says we should study together

Is she just toying around with me or some **** or just being friendly?
kinda confuse
Anyways, since I did get the no twice now I nexted her

[Dennis71]

Hey OP, check your PM's

[IronPuma]

you're absolutly right i dont wanna be single, but that doesnt mean I should NEED to be in love. I wanna curb it so I can see the women in my life for who they really are, instead of looking at them through some rose colored glasses and thinking they're perfect.

Its a mentaility my friend. there is no switch i can turn on for you and now you wont be emotionally involved. some tips.

- stop reading women hate threads on the misc
i do it all the time but i think you do do this and its subconciously affecting you. your purposely trying to find reasons to not date these women. i see this a lot. its not something you realize now but think about it.
- stop being needy
women dont like needy guys. try caring less. especially hot women. you'll see the true character come out when they start chasing you. women like 8's and 9's get chased all day. be a nice change if they had to fight for your attention.

the change needs to come within you. im sure when you were 20 single and loving it you met plenty of women you'd date. try to resurect that mentality. i think you'll have a lot of success with this if you get back in that frame of mind.

why dont we do weekend updates? try my advice ans we'll work week by week and see if i cant help you improve your situation. focus on those few things above and let me know how its working so i can tweak it. i'd like to hear more about your single 20's. see if we can get that back. did you have any bad breakups that affected you? maybe even to this day?

let me know.

-girl sends me some strong signals (touching, smiling, asked for my #)
-week later shoot her a few texts, ask her out, says shes busy, next time
-see her in class, she says shell text me over the weekend to hang out, sounds good right?
-didn't happen
-another week goes by, final attempt from me to ask her out, shes busy
-later in school shes all touching my arm, asking how my weekend was and ****, says we should study together

Is she just toying around with me or some **** or just being friendly?
kinda confuse
Anyways, since I did get the no twice now I nexted her

would you consider yourself the smart one in the class?

[IronPuma]

Hey OP, check your PM's

HOLY PM BATMAN

i'll read that essay later tonight. i'll respond after my workout. legs boy!!!

but i will get to it tonight.

[Spartan5364]

would you consider yourself the smart one in the class?

Definitely not, pretty much everyone knows I've been struggling

[IronPuma]

Definitely not, pretty much everyone knows I've been struggling

study with her brah...then piitb. im pretty sure shes toying with you. but if your struggling then it might be wise to study with her anyway.

[RainbowSmelt]

any tips that work that may help my sex life.

its far from satisfying... more like frustrating... and i dont wanna get shot in the back with a 12 guage over it.

[IronPuma]

any tips that work that may help my sex life.

its far from satisfying... more like frustrating... and i dont wanna get shot in the back with a 12 guage over it.

care to elaborate on what exactly is unsatisfying.

[aggieman122]

Alright, this is a complicated situation to say the least. Basically, I met this girl and I know she has been attracted to me physically since the beginning of fall 2011 semester. Since I originally didn't like her, I kind of put her on the backburner which increased the attraction and I ended up taking her to my fraternity formal (which I blacked out at and she got pissed). Over Christmas break, I followed a friend’s advice and apologized to her to which she replied she missed me and wanted to hang out. She also randomly texted me saying her sister and friends thought I was hot. Then she was never able to come out because of “family events” but it was around Christmas. After this, I asked her friend and her friend said she is a HUGE tease to guys. After I heard this, I started ignoring her. Over the next couple of weeks she messaged me saying stuff which appeared she really wanted to come out. Since her friend said she was a tease I figured I would just move on and play aloof. When she messaged me she said stuff like “would you let me back into your life if I asked haha?” So to get back at her I sent her a Happy valentines text to which she replied then I deleted her off ******** the next day. After doing this, I didn't see her for 2 weeks until I was invited by her best friend to go to a museum with them for college. This is where I get confused, because for some reason I felt a ton of tension between us and could tell she was mad. Basically, she kept saying "Hi" to me awkwardly when I was working on my project. Then she gave me a hug where she rubbed my stomach/abs. Prior to this, she literally flirted with every other guy we went with to which I acted like I didn't notice. Then the second I said something slightly negative to her when we were talking 1 on 1 she got really defensive and angry. The next night I texted her when she bailed on her friend’s birthday dinner and she never texted back. Can anyone help my understand this girl???

CLIFFS
1. Girl is attracted to me, I play aloof all first semester, take her to fraternity formal.
2. Black out at formal, girl leaves early
3. Follow advice, apologize act really nice, she says she misses me and wants to hang out
4. Flakes on me and plans multiple times (in fairness, I always said for her to come to parties, never 1 on 1 dates)
5. Keeps telling me she wants to hang out, her best friend tells me she’s a tease
6. Asks if "i hate her," I say no, 2 weeks later she asks if "I would let her back into my life if she asked"
7. See her at school, she grabs my arm (just finished at the gym) and makes me hug her 2-3 times
8. Send her Valentines text, delete her from ******** soon after to move on
9. See her at museum, she clearly wanted to talk/hug me, felt alot of tension
10. text her next day, she doesn't reply.

[IronPuma]

Alright, this is a complicated situation to say the least. Basically, I met this girl and I know she has been attracted to me physically since the beginning of fall 2011 semester. Since I originally didn't like her, I kind of put her on the backburner which increased the attraction and I ended up taking her to my fraternity formal (which I blacked out at and she got pissed). Over Christmas break, I followed a friend’s advice and apologized to her to which she replied she missed me and wanted to hang out. She also randomly texted me saying her sister and friends thought I was hot. Then she was never able to come out because of “family events” but it was around Christmas. After this, I asked her friend and her friend said she is a HUGE tease to guys. After I heard this, I started ignoring her. Over the next couple of weeks she messaged me saying stuff which appeared she really wanted to come out. Since her friend said she was a tease I figured I would just move on and play aloof. When she messaged me she said stuff like “would you let me back into your life if I asked haha?” So to get back at her I sent her a Happy valentines text to which she replied then I deleted her off ******** the next day. After doing this, I didn't see her for 2 weeks until I was invited by her best friend to go to a museum with them for college. This is where I get confused, because for some reason I felt a ton of tension between us and could tell she was mad. Basically, she kept saying "Hi" to me awkwardly when I was working on my project. Then she gave me a hug where she rubbed my stomach/abs. Prior to this, she literally flirted with every other guy we went with to which I acted like I didn't notice. Then the second I said something slightly negative to her when we were talking 1 on 1 she got really defensive and angry. The next night I texted her when she bailed on her friend’s birthday dinner and she never texted back. Can anyone help my understand this girl???

CLIFFS
1. Girl is attracted to me, I play aloof all first semester, take her to fraternity formal.
2. Black out at formal, girl leaves early
3. Follow advice, apologize act really nice, she says she misses me and wants to hang out
4. Flakes on me and plans multiple times (in fairness, I always said for her to come to parties, never 1 on 1 dates)
5. Keeps telling me she wants to hang out, her best friend tells me she’s a tease
6. Asks if "i hate her," I say no, 2 weeks later she asks if "I would let her back into my life if she asked"
7. See her at school, she grabs my arm (just finished at the gym) and makes me hug her 2-3 times
8. Send her Valentines text, delete her from ******** soon after to move on
9. See her at museum, she clearly wanted to talk/hug me, felt alot of tension
10. text her next day, she doesn't reply.

read the bold her friend told you that cause she wanted to bang you ya clown.

women hate each other. their only friends so they can gang up on people they hate more.

long story short...you dun goofed. sounds like she wanted something more.

[imajoey]

Im young but i cant ever make a move im just ****ing scared, hungout with girl twice alone just drove around we had nowhere to go, she is pretty classy compared to other girls i know i need to make a move i just dont know how to do it

Im only 16 Inb4 teen misc, help me please

[IronPuma]

Im young but i cant ever make a move im just ****ing scared, hungout with girl twice alone just drove around we had nowhere to go, she is pretty classy compared to other girls i know i need to make a move i just dont know how to do it

Im only 16 Inb4 teen misc, help me please

srs theres no science to it. you just need to man up and do it. just say **** it and do it. not out loud lol in your head. stop being so beta.

[RainbowSmelt]

care to elaborate on what exactly is unsatisfying.

frequency we have sex is terrible (got sexed once or twice a month, and once so far in 2012)
selfish in bed
never initiates, maybe 3 times our whole relationship, when she do its something like "wanna have sex erwha?"

dont wanna sound like a 70's song, but i want her to want me, and i want her to meet my "needs/expectations" of a sex life.

[aggieman122]

read the bold her friend told you that cause she wanted to bang you ya clown.

women hate each other. their only friends so they can gang up on people they hate more.

long story short...you dun goofed. sounds like she wanted something more.

Haha, I actually have heard that multiple times and am starting to believe it. Came from private school so I haven't been exposed to as many types of personalities of women as most. Anyhow, I messaged her "XXXX, I miss our tension free hangouts where you aren't mad at me like at the museum. I may have been a bit of a jerk lately, but don't stay mad at your math buddy toooo long." She said "XX! I didn't mean to be rude at the museum. I'm sorry if I was, I wasn't mad at you at all I was just stressed out about other stuff. I'm not mad at you and I miss our tension free handouts too " Regardless of whether or not she was mad as she clearly was, how should I approach the situation from this point forward?

[IronPuma]

frequency we have sex is terrible (got sexed once or twice a month, and once so far in 2012)
selfish in bed
never initiates, maybe 3 times our whole relationship, when she do its something like "wanna have sex erwha?"

dont wanna sound like a 70's song, but i want her to want me, and i want her to meet my "needs/expectations" of a sex life.

"you need her to need you..."

have you tried comunicating this with her?

Haha, I actually have heard that multiple times and am starting to believe it. Came from private school so I haven't been exposed to as many types of personalities of women as most. Anyhow, I messaged her "XXXX, I miss our tension free hangouts where you aren't mad at me like at the museum. I may have been a bit of a jerk lately, but don't stay mad at your math buddy toooo long." She said "XX! I didn't mean to be rude at the museum. I'm sorry if I was, I wasn't mad at you at all I was just stressed out about other stuff. I'm not mad at you and I miss our tension free handouts too " Regardless of whether or not she was mad as she clearly was, how should I approach the situation from this point forward?

just do what you were doing before. you were doing fine till you listened to her friend. seriously, women are your worst enemy when it comes to advice about their friend. they will in most cases f you over. some people just wanna watch the world burn...others just wanna bang their friends fling. decide for yourself if shes a tease.