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  1. #1
    将軍 TheAnimal_013's Avatar
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    How should I approach this girl from my college class?

    I have two classes with this girl and have had my eye on her since day 1. Usually I wind up going after very "approachable" girls. Ones that are very outgoing and feel easy to just walk up to and shoot the sh!t with. 8/10 times I hit it off with them.

    This girl is a little different. She's very quiet, doesn't smile too often, and mostly keeps to herself (although I don't get the feeling it's because she's shy). I'm obviously attracted to her physically but I think what really got me interested in her was the fact that she's been through sh!t I couldn't even conceive of (we had to talk a little bit about our past the other day in class and she blew my fcking mind). She's a strong, a survivor. And in a way I'm really attracted to her for that.


    At any rate, I have no idea how to approach this girl or what to say. I feel like I don't know enough about her to know if we have anything in common and that she wouldn't be all that reactive to my style of humor/making jokes.

    Is there anything you guys can advise me to do? I've definitely improved from what I was in high school. I'm talkin to a lot of girls nowadays but I'm interested in this specific one atm.

    Was originally thinking pulling out the "want to study together?" thing but realized I haven't seen ANYBODY in ANY of my classes and don't know ANY friends in my college that even remotely do that. She'd likely get freaked out and know I was trying to come onto her.
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  2. #2
    Registered User Luke_Skyguy's Avatar
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    You: Hi
    Her: Yes?
    You: I wanted a woman's opinion on something.
    Her: (oh boy he must think I'm super smart hahahahahah, feelsgoodman.jpg) Sure, ask away.
    You: How do I start a conversation with a woman I'm interested in?


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  3. #3
    将軍 TheAnimal_013's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Luke_Skyguy View Post
    You: Hi
    Her: Yes?
    You: I wanted a woman's opinion on something.
    Her: (oh boy he must think I'm super smart hahahahahah, feelsgoodman.jpg) Sure, ask away.
    You: How do I start a conversation with a woman I'm interested in?


    No credit taken.
    Erm...very informative...I suppose...
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  4. #4
    Registered User polarbro's Avatar
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    k there are a few ways you could go with this, more info would be helpful if you got it!

    do you know any of her friends? you could find out through them

    how shy is SHY? like would she hold a conversation with you even?

    as for being nervous about she will respond to you, thats the easy part. assuming you are not a creepy weirdo (lulz) just be yourself. if she doesnt like you for who you are then there prob isnt much of a future there anyway and you can stop day dreaming and move on.

    as for actual advice....
    i would ask her about something in class, like pretend you didnt understand something and ask for some help. if she is responsive and seems to acting normal, then you can pull out the "thanks! we should study sometime!" card. just try and play it cool like its no big deal.

    if you had any more info at all it would prob help us to give you better advice!
    On drilling in the arctic and the death of polar bears who drown due to exhaustion after swimming for miles

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  5. #5
    Registered User Luke_Skyguy's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by TheAnimal_013 View Post
    Erm...very informative...I suppose...
    Now rep me to inspire me to give more informative answers in the future.
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  6. #6
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    You could always use the line "I find you intriguing" after class one day... Then tell her why you find her intriguing. "I found what you said in class to say a lot about who you are and the strength of your character. I would really like to get to know you better, wanna go for coffee?"


    something like that. Won't freak her out if you are complimenting her admirable character.
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  7. #7
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    this is a no brainer. think about whatever she said that intrigued you. come up with a question about it and ask her
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  8. #8
    将軍 TheAnimal_013's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by polarbro View Post
    k there are a few ways you could go with this, more info would be helpful if you got it!

    do you know any of her friends? you could find out through them

    how shy is SHY? like would she hold a conversation with you even?

    as for being nervous about she will respond to you, thats the easy part. assuming you are not a creepy weirdo (lulz) just be yourself. if she doesnt like you for who you are then there prob isnt much of a future there anyway and you can stop day dreaming and move on.

    as for actual advice....
    i would ask her about something in class, like pretend you didnt understand something and ask for some help. if she is responsive and seems to acting normal, then you can pull out the "thanks! we should study sometime!" card. just try and play it cool like its no big deal.

    if you had any more info at all it would prob help us to give you better advice!
    I don't know any of her friends. She doesn't seem to talk to anyone in the classes we have together. She could likely hold a conversation with me. I just have a goofy approach when it comes to talking to girls and friends. Therefore I do well with girls with goofy personalities (although those aren't always the girls I'm into).

    We don't sit very close together so asking her for "help" would be kinda difficult in class. And I can just feel it...the "how about we study together" thing is just gonna freak her out considering nobody around here does it.
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  9. #9
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    I am in the same situation OP. There's a chick in my university class(it's like a classroom of 35 people), who's shy, keeps her head down a lot, but is evidently smart and does contribute to classroom discussions from time to time. She sits alone with a seat next to her. Would be weird to just stop sitting next to the people I usually sit next to and take a seat next to her.

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  10. #10
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    Originally Posted by hai2dehfolks View Post
    You could always use the line "I find you intriguing" after class one day... Then tell her why you find her intriguing. "I found what you said in class to say a lot about who you are and the strength of your character. I would really like to get to know you better, wanna go for coffee?"


    something like that. Won't freak her out if you are complimenting her admirable character.
    This sounds like it could be workable. Risky but what's life without a little risk?


    And as for what she blew my mind with.

    She revealed that she was raised in a drug-happy environment. She's a former drug addict, she's been sober for a few years now. I was just amazed because she seems COMPLETELY normal aside from being the quiet/reserved type. I don't want to get too much into her story but the sh!t she's been through, well there's normally no coming back from that.
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  11. #11
    Registered User BasedInFapCity's Avatar
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    ask her about something related to the class. i.e homework...then make joke if possible and ask her name. ask why shes in that class or how shes doing in it. youve now opened communication lines.
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  12. #12
    Registered User polarbro's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by TheAnimal_013 View Post
    This sounds like it could be workable. Risky but what's life without a little risk?


    And as for what she blew my mind with.

    She revealed that she was raised in a drug-happy environment. She's a former drug addict, she's been sober for a few years now. I was just amazed because she seems COMPLETELY normal aside from being the quiet/reserved type. I don't want to get too much into her story but the sh!t she's been through, well there's normally no coming back from that.
    hahah i personally wouldnt use that line as i think the complements put together with "wanna go for coffee" make is painfully obvious that you wanna bang her. but if she is attracted to you, then it might work out in your favor! but yea you should go for it, whatever happens its better than just staring at her from afar in class. best of luck!
    On drilling in the arctic and the death of polar bears who drown due to exhaustion after swimming for miles

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  13. #13
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    Originally Posted by polarbro View Post
    hahah i personally wouldnt use that line as i think the complements put together with "wanna go for coffee" make is painfully obvious that you wanna bang her. but if she is attracted to you, then it might work out in your favor! but yea you should go for it, whatever happens its better than just staring at her from afar in class. best of luck!
    I can see where you're coming from but do you have any better ideas besides asking her for help in class (which as I explained before would be kinda difficult, and seeing as how I'm a pretty good student myself it'd look out of place if I asked her for serious help outside of class as well imo)
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  14. #14
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    Walk the same way as her after class and ask her about something that happened in class (e.g., what pages were we supposed to read for hw, did you understand what the professor meant by _____); what you say doesn't matter too much, the purpose is just to initiate conversation. After she responds, mention that you remember what she had said in class and you found it intriguing, interesting, admirable, or whatever. If you come across as genuine she should be flattered, then you can introduce yourself and go from there. After you've introduced yourself you'll feel much more comfortable initiating conversations with her in the future.
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  15. #15
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    Originally Posted by Luke_Skyguy View Post
    You: Hi
    Her: Yes?
    You: I wanted a woman's opinion on something.
    Her: (oh boy he must think I'm super smart hahahahahah, feelsgoodman.jpg) Sure, ask away.
    You: How do I start a conversation with a woman I'm interested in?


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    lol, I suggested this in another tread LOL
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  16. #16
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    Originally Posted by IbanezHomie View Post
    Walk the same way as her after class and ask her about something that happened in class (e.g., what pages were we supposed to read for hw, did you understand what the professor meant by _____); what you say doesn't matter too much, the purpose is just to initiate conversation. After she responds, mention that you remember what she had said in class and you found it intriguing, interesting, admirable, or whatever. If you come across as genuine she should be flattered, then you can introduce yourself and go from there. After you've introduced yourself you'll feel much more comfortable initiating conversations with her in the future.
    Was thinking about doing that and then saying something like the following

    *After asking my random question about class*

    "By the way, I don't mean to sound cheesy or anything but I really liked the speech/story you gave the other day. I think it's/your story is really inspiring. It takes a lot of strength to get over/go through what you have/to deal with what you had going on."


    Or something like that. Hopefully that's not too wk-ish.
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    Why don't you take note of your own sig column and take note of this:
    "There are no limits, you are only limited by however far you want to be limited"

    Stop limiting yourself.
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    Originally Posted by TheAnimal_013 View Post
    This sounds like it could be workable. Risky but what's life without a little risk?


    And as for what she blew my mind with.

    She revealed that she was raised in a drug-happy environment. She's a former drug addict, she's been sober for a few years now. I was just amazed because she seems COMPLETELY normal aside from being the quiet/reserved type. I don't want to get too much into her story but the sh!t she's been through, well there's normally no coming back from that.
    Let her know that you'd like to get to know her better... do.it.
    Originally Posted by polarbro View Post
    hahah i personally wouldnt use that line as i think the complements put together with "wanna go for coffee" make is painfully obvious that you wanna bang her. but if she is attracted to you, then it might work out in your favor! but yea you should go for it, whatever happens its better than just staring at her from afar in class. best of luck!
    How is that "painfully obvious" that he wants to bang her by asking her to get some coffee and have a conversation. Now if he asked her to come over to his place for a movie I'd be all fryskeptical.jpg... but this is HARMLESS. She can meet him there, and leave without him if she so chooses. I've met guys at a coffee shop before, gotten my impression of what they're like and have made my initial decision and have gone from there. Seems like the perfect first meet up imho.
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    Originally Posted by Granrey View Post
    lol, I suggested this in another tread LOL
    Did you at least give me credit?
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    Originally Posted by roosky11 View Post
    Why don't you take note of your own sig column and take note of this:
    "There are no limits, you are only limited by however far you want to be limited"

    Stop limiting yourself.
    It's easier to do that in other areas of life for me. When it comes to members of the opposite sex it takes a little more out of me to keep my sh!t together.

    Originally Posted by TheAnimal_013 View Post
    Was thinking about doing that and then saying something like the following

    *After asking my random question about class*

    "By the way, I don't mean to sound cheesy or anything but I really liked the speech/story you gave the other day. I think it's/your story is really inspiring. It takes a lot of strength to get over/go through what you have/to deal with what you had going on."


    Or something like that. Hopefully that's not too wk-ish.
    Can I just get some confirmation if this sound alright or not? On more than one ocassion I think something sounds pretty casual or ok and girls look at me funny because it comes out wrong.
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  21. #21
    Registered User Super10's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by TheAnimal_013 View Post
    It's easier to do that in other areas of life for me. When it comes to members of the opposite sex it takes a little more out of me to keep my sh!t together.



    Can I just get some confirmation if this sound alright or not? On more than one ocassion I think something sounds pretty casual or ok and girls look at me funny because it comes out wrong.



    Bro, what's wrong with the "study together part?" I just asked a girl recently if she wanted to study (interested in her) and she said Definitely! Gave me her number and everything.
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    Originally Posted by Super10 View Post
    Bro, what's wrong with the "study together part?" I just asked a girl recently if she wanted to study (interested in her) and she said Definitely! Gave me her number and everything.
    I don't feel very comfortable with the study approach. I'd rather do something that's more "me" or at least something I can feel somewhat confident about doing/saying.
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  23. #23
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    Originally Posted by TheAnimal_013 View Post
    I don't feel very comfortable with the study approach. I'd rather do something that's more "me" or at least something I can feel somewhat confident about doing/saying.


    The whole point of a study session is to get to know her + study. You and I both know in college you will have to take breaks to eat and shoot the shyt. The next best thing is to really tell her how you feel such as what you posted earlier " hey your story inspired me" it's easy the problem sometimes is the timing.
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  24. #24
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    Originally Posted by Super10 View Post
    The whole point of a study session is to get to know her + study. You and I both know in college you will have to take breaks to eat and shoot the shyt. The next best thing is to really tell her how you feel such as what you posted earlier " hey your story inspired me" it's easy the problem sometimes is the timing.
    I hear you. But even personally, I prefer to study alone to get sh!t done. Plus I've never studied together with anyone. Don't know how to study with 2+ people.


    Side note, I'm not sure I'm wanting to flat out ask her out yet. Intersted in just getting off the launch pad first and getting on a "friendly" basis with her where we can actually talk to each other from time to time first.
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  25. #25
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    Why does everyone make this so difficult. It's not figuring out the damn rubix cube.

    Go up to her and say Hi, say something along the subjec tline of the particular class you are in.

    Last week, I was walking to class waiting to cross the street and me and this girl saw eachother. We both recognized eachother (sat different ends, never talked) and I smile and ask her how she thought the test was. From there we small talk for a little over 5 minutes and I introduce myself as she does also. Will be in that class Thursday, probably do the same thing and ask her what's on the agenda for the weekend and offer that we should hangout.

    It really is not that hard.
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    /thread
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  27. #27
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    Lol @ douchebag frat boy polo and sperry crew approaches

    You: Hey im _____ nice to meet you
    her: hey im ______ nice to meet you too
    You: I heard your story yesterday and i thought it was amazing


    /thread

    Phaggots.
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  28. #28
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    OP please establish rapport with the girl before asking her to hang out. will most likely come off as creepy. you need to work your personality or interests into the conversation if you want to talk to her.

    lets say you have a test be like ugh i dont want to study, i wanna ______________ (hit the gym, burn, get yucky with the boys, read a book, etc etc).

    your number 1 priority is to shift the conversation AWAY from school. away from class. every foreveralone beta phaggot will talk about school. or just be like
    i'm so excited about this weekend cause i'm about to go see ______________ (Cosmic Gate). Then you can start a conversation on music. I usually then explain what Cosmic Gate is.

    When girls talk about music I always tell them a bit about me--> for example I'm not a fan of mainstream type rap music because lyrically they are pieces of ****. I like trance, and instrumental type music. I say I love beautiful music that resonates with your soul and you can feel it within you.(Girls will eat this sh*t out of your *******).

    Just some easy ways to shift the convo away from school.

    Judging on her personality she is the type that you will have to talk more, and carry the conversation more. But make sure to include her. And involve her.

    Originally Posted by willmakeit View Post
    Lol @ douchebag frat boy polo and sperry crew approaches

    You: Hey im _____ nice to meet you
    her: hey im ______ nice to meet you too
    You: I heard your story yesterday and i thought it was amazing


    /thread

    Phaggots.
    also +1 for the red
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    Has to use a soundboard to order pizza crew
    Doesn't actually lift crew

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    Originally Posted by outfoxxed View Post
    OP please establish rapport with the girl before asking her to hang out. will most likely come off as creepy. you need to work your personality or interests into the conversation if you want to talk to her.

    lets say you have a test be like ugh i dont want to study, i wanna ______________ (hit the gym, burn, get yucky with the boys, read a book, etc etc).

    your number 1 priority is to shift the conversation AWAY from school. away from class. every foreveralone beta phaggot will talk about school. or just be like
    i'm so excited about this weekend cause i'm about to go see ______________ (Cosmic Gate). Then you can start a conversation on music. I usually then explain what Cosmic Gate is.

    When girls talk about music I always tell them a bit about me--> for example I'm not a fan of mainstream type rap music because lyrically they are pieces of ****. I like trance, and instrumental type music. I say I love beautiful music that resonates with your soul and you can feel it within you.(Girls will eat this sh*t out of your *******).

    Just some easy ways to shift the convo away from school.

    Judging on her personality she is the type that you will have to talk more, and carry the conversation more. But make sure to include her. And involve her.



    also +1 for the red
    Noted. This post kind of unclogged my head a bit. Thanks.
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    Originally Posted by TheAnimal_013 View Post
    I hear you. But even personally, I prefer to study alone to get sh!t done. Plus I've never studied together with anyone. Don't know how to study with 2+ people.


    Side note, I'm not sure I'm wanting to flat out ask her out yet. Intersted in just getting off the launch pad first and getting on a "friendly" basis with her where we can actually talk to each other from time to time first.
    well if you ever feel you've built up enough rapport wif her, haha

    the human mind is actually able to imagine methods for 2+ person studying

    im sure you can conceive of examples

    although if you're somehow debilitated in this aspect, i shall brainstorm for you if ye confess such a handicap
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