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Banned
my girlfriend destroys my motivation
Every time I want to go to the gym, she starts acting like a little girl wanting attention and then gets mad after every minute that passes by and Im still at the gym. I feel stupid and get mad at myself for losing motivation, but I cannot control my emotions.
In nutrition, its even worse. She does not let me monitor my nutrition facts, she starts telling me how I am obsessed with my body and how I do not accept myself as I am. I do not really give a rat about what she says because she is the one being stupid and not caring about her body and health.
I cant motivate myself to go to the gym and I am only able to go 1 day, then 2 days off, then 1 day...etc. I hate going irregularly to the gym, it makes me feel like I am wasting my time, because I cannot make any gains and can barely lift what I usually do with ease when I was on a regular schedule going to the gym
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Banned
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Registered User
Just tell her to get over it
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Registered User
If you can't motivate yourself, you're doomed to fail.
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Genesis 28:15
You have to eliminate all of the negatives so be successful.. You can use negatives as motivation for so long but your significant other needs to be the one person who stands behind you 110%. You should explain to her why you want to work out (being healthy, looking good for her, etc) and maybe she will understand... Good luck
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Registered User
Ignore her and get on with your training/eating. She cant physically stop you, just ignore the bitching and whining. Treat her like a child.
Or ditch her (srs).
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Misc's Reckoning
You gotta tell her the reasons behind the working out and nutrtion logging, prove to her the reason you do it all. If she can't accept that, imagine the thjns she won't be able to accept if the relationship grows further. Ouch
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Registered User
I was in a similar position recently. I stopped going to the gym consistently. Stopped paying so much attention to what I was eating. My gains dropped off... I got dumped. Back to before Square 1.
Keep at it. She doesn't like it? She can always ditch you but better she ditches you while you're in great shape, progressing and have momentum than she ditches you after you lose everything you've worked so hard for.
If I were in your position, I'd be pretty mad. Mad at her for providing opposition where you should only expect support. Use that anger in the gym - Go eat a cow and bench press a lorry.
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Transforming
Why would you wanna stick around with someone who doesn't support everything you do? My wife supports me 110%. She might complain a bit when she does the grocery shopping but that's about it. Now I overhear her bragging to her friends that I'm dedicated and starting to look bigger, etc. You can't do it with negative people in your life like that. I'm sure you're starting to see that though.
STRENGTH. POWER. FITNESS.
EAT BIG, LIFT BIG, GET BIG!
TRANSFORMING MY BODY ONE DAY AT A TIME::
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Registered User
She can't complain if she's dead.
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Registered User
if you care about training and this is who you really are, who is she to tell you what you should be doing? for your relationship to work she has to like you for who you are. if not stop wasting your time man...
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Registered User
just calmly ask her if you love me you will support me and accept me.
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Registered User
I know how you feel man. It was basically ended the relationship I was in. I just couldn't stand what seemed to be negative talk about me trying to set my own personal records, getting stronger and bigger. In the end I just F it and now I'm happy. Find someone that has the passion as you. She doesn't have to be a runner or someone that worksout, but someone that strives to be the best.
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Registered User
Tell her to shut the hell up and go to the gym with you or kick her to the curb. Don't let her kill your motivation.
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Registered User
Originally Posted by nofear24pr
Every time I want to go to the gym, she starts acting like a little girl wanting attention and then gets mad after every minute that passes by and Im still at the gym. I feel stupid and get mad at myself for losing motivation, but I cannot control my emotions.
In nutrition, its even worse. She does not let me monitor my nutrition facts, she starts telling me how I am obsessed with my body and how I do not accept myself as I am. I do not really give a rat about what she says because she is the one being stupid and not caring about her body and health.
I cant motivate myself to go to the gym and I am only able to go 1 day, then 2 days off, then 1 day...etc. I hate going irregularly to the gym, it makes me feel like I am wasting my time, because I cannot make any gains and can barely lift what I usually do with ease when I was on a regular schedule going to the gym
it will never change some people are just like that drop her i wouldn't even have to think about it
Squat ATC- 315
Bench - 220
Deadlift - 405
Front Squat - 255
Hang Clean - 165
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Registered User
Unbelievable that your girlfriend does not support your desire to live a healthy and active life. I mean, how ****ing selfish can she be to prevent you going to the gym. Now I could almost understand if she was freakin over roids or an eating disorder, but merely watching what you eat in this day and age of fast food crap and processed fake tv dinners?
Seriously, do whatever you want and ignore the selfish whining. She will either deal with it or not. I would also question the value of being with this kind of person. You only get one life and one body dude. Dont let these years slip by you. It goes faster than you realize.
I feel frustrated for you man. Good luck whatever happens.
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Registered User
I broke up with my last girlfriend because she didn't want me to compete and always tried to make me feel guilty about doing it.
If she can't support you mate, she doesn't deserve your time. Find someone who can
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Registered User
Lay out some ground rules and tell her to stop bitching about it. (srs), OR just let her complain but ignore her pouting entirely.
2ndly, just because she doesnt dedicate lots of attention to her health or body doesn't make her stupid or not as good as you, but her complaining about you doing your own thing is kindof whack. Different people have different goals in life
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I suck at usernames
You will meet your goals.
Originally Posted by nofear24pr
Every time I want to go to the gym, she starts acting like a little girl wanting attention and then gets mad after every minute that passes by and Im still at the gym. I feel stupid and get mad at myself for losing motivation, but I cannot control my emotions.
In nutrition, its even worse. She does not let me monitor my nutrition facts, she starts telling me how I am obsessed with my body and how I do not accept myself as I am. I do not really give a rat about what she says because she is the one being stupid and not caring about her body and health.
I cant motivate myself to go to the gym and I am only able to go 1 day, then 2 days off, then 1 day...etc. I hate going irregularly to the gym, it makes me feel like I am wasting my time, because I cannot make any gains and can barely lift what I usually do with ease when I was on a regular schedule going to the gym
You care about your health and fitness. You are doing the right thing. It is amazing how negative some people can be toward the most positive things. You have your goals set and I know just from reading your post, that you are dedicated and commited to meeting those goals no matter what gets in your way. Right now, there is something in your way. And you don't allow that.
Say this out loud to yourself (srs)
" I don't allow anything to stop me from achieving my goals"
Just say it once out loud. Then do what you have to do... whatever it may be.
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AKA The Gingerbread Man
I learned a long time ago that girls were easier to get then gains... once you are in the gym, it's strictly business! If she doesn't get that picture, then you know what you need to do next
How do you think it would feel to go around the world in a day??
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Registered User
This is not good.
There are far worse things that you could be passionate about that still deserve understanding and support from the person that you are in a relationship with.
Maybe she gives you a hard time because of the following reasons:
1) She is insecure. Your girlfriend feels insecure about herself, perhaps even envies your self-control and the fact that you have more will-power and passion for a healthy lifestyle than herself. Therefore, whenever you hit the gym, or check a food label, it's a constant reminder to her that you are making a choice, putting forth an effort, the exact effort that she perhaps cannot manage to do so herself.
2) She is selfish. She feels that your devotion to training/dieting, as silly as it may seem, deters your devotion to her. Most selfish people find that any time or effort put forth towards anything that doesn't have to do with them, they will often view that as a threat, and make efforts to extinguish it.
3) She is jealous. This one kind of involves both 1) and 2) above. Most jealous people are both insecure and selfish. I have known girls to be jealous of their boyfriends training so much because they, "think he is trying to get in really good shape to show off for other girls" <---- if you ever hear her say something along these lines, start doing cardio in the opposite direction that she is standing.
Last piece of advice:
COMMUNICATE! I think that if you just sit her down and explain to her in a very honest and calm manner about the reasons why you choose to train, diet, etc. and explain that all you want is her support, then she might get a better understanding about it and learn to appreciate it.
If the only time that you try to explain it to her is when you are in the heat of defending yourself after she has given you a hard time about it, then you might not get the message across as effectively.
Good luck!
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Registered User
I've dropped +/- 40 lbs since October ..and every single day of every single month my girlfriend has been in full support of me, mostly because it pertains to my career and I'm sure she'd like a sexier boyfriend lol but if your girlfriend truly wants you to be happy then this is the way so tell her to plug a hole in it because this is what you want. Sounds like she's obsessed with attention lol.
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█▬█ STFU & LIFT █▬█
You're 19... you will have 20 more GFs. Go do what you got to do. End of story.
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Registered User
Originally Posted by nofear24pr
In nutrition, its even worse. She does not let me monitor my nutrition facts, she starts telling me how I am obsessed with my body and how I do not accept myself as I am. I do not really give a rat about what she says because she is the one being stupid and not caring about her body and health.
Originally Posted by VaiB3
just calmly ask her if you love me you will support me and accept me.
UMMM let's see. you girlfriend doesn't have to really care about herself or her nutritional needs. When my Hubby started his cut I laughed at him.But I did support him. I cooked meals based on what he could/couldn't eat. If she won't even let you monitor your nutritional facts there may be deeper problems.
You're young. here's a life lesson. You need to find someone who will accept you for you-warts and all. She may not like it,may not agree with it but she should support you.
Just sit down, TALK to her about this, see what she says, and then take it from there.
OBF 2012/2013
~~~
Sept 16th - 136.6
Oct 14th - 133.0
Nov 18th -
Dec 16th -
Jan 6th -
~~~
My progress from the beginning : http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=132269853
~~~~~~~~~~~~
March 2011 - 168lbs
Dec. 31'11 - 135lbs
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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is small and weak
She's probably just insecure about herself, and feels as she might lose you because as your body progresses, you'll get more female attention. I'd just bring her along to the gym, teach her how nutrition plays a big role in your gains,etc. If she doesn't want and keeps getting in your way to your goals, just dump her.
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BBfootball
its your life brah do as you please. Explain to her that its not just obsessing about your body its a lifestyle. Tell her to never put makeup on or do her hair again cause if she does shes not "acceptn herself for who she is" herpderp. Life life the way you want to, not the way someone else wants you to
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Jersey crew ! 201 brah
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My supplement is your mom
If the iron game is important to you, explain it to her once.
If she doesn't cooperate, she obviously doesn't value what you believe is important or feel the need to respect it, so you should dump her.
I'm serious and not saying it to be a typical BB.com member, I've had girlfriends before who didn't understand or respect my passions in life and it just doesn't work out. If she's pissed off at you for going off to lift weights now she'll be pissed off 10 years from now.
NOxplode, animal pak, dessicated liver, espresso powder and cod liver oil blended up in a big cup of extra virgin olive oil.
Conventional wisdom is stupid, DEADLIFT EVERY DAY.
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The Dude Abides
I know it's always easier said than done, but the relationship will not work if she doesn't support you and your interests. Even if you do all you can to make it work, if she isn't behind you all the way then you're just wasting your time. Talk to her and set things straight in a calm and civil manner and if she doesn't like it then that is her loss.
It's a two way street when it comes to a relationship, you both need the support from each other. If she can't offer that then she's not the one for you.
There are too many out there to suppress who you are just for the sake of making things work between the two of you.
Best of luck, we've all been there at one point or another.
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Starting Weight 7lbs 11oz
girlfriends have to support you.... explain to her that this is a battle that you as a person needs to do. its hard to take on everything when you not in my corner... REAL TALK
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dat dere stick insect
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