Are there patterns by which people choose partners?

[TurbulentFluid]

All these questions on the forum inspired me to ask this... Everyone seems to be wondering if women like men that are such and such over men that are such and such, and vice versa, and whether this and that...

But by what I see, there are basically only a few profiles of people that don't get married / layed: the obvious group is "people who don't want to", and then there are people who have serious problems that no one wants to deal with (psychos, serious law offenders, heavy drug/alcohol adicts...) I mean, everyone else seems to have / been in relationship/s at some point of their lives, and that there's a foot for every shoe unless the shoe is SERIOUSLY damaged / absolutely unwearable...

But there seems to be a growing industry of Relationship User Manuals, tons of magazines keep earning tons of dough on teaching us what perfume we absolutely have to buy to ever get in bed with someone, and everyone seems to be concerned about "what wo/men want" as if there actually IS such a thing that we could "hang" upon our person (whether it's looks, or a characteristic, or clothes...) that would make us go from a social zero to a social hero (and get us layed a lot)... It seems to me that for every guy that likes big boobs there's a guy who likes tiny/no boobs, for every woman who puts a 6-pack as no1 there's one that loves skinny guys and one that thinks chubbies are adoreable, for every person that wants to marry a lawyer there's one that absolutely doesn't care about the partners career/finances, for everyone that wants to be with a priest there's someone who prefers delinquents... And the list goes on.

What do ya'll think about it?

[Beklet]

The whole thing winds me up.

All those magazines about how to get the 'pefect' man, and dictating to us what he should be like, what his 'beauty' regime should be, it's all rubbish.
No-one is perfect. Everyone will have little things about them that niggle us. Articles telling us how to ge tthe perfect this that or the other are just setting us up for disappointment.
I'm certainly not perfect, so how the hell can I expect my partner to be?

As for type - though I am generally attracted to wiry blond long haired rock god types , my recent er lay has a rugby player build and is evtremely hairy all over, but with short hair and dark eyes. I also fancied a slightly chubby blond psychobilly for a while.

If people just loosened up and stopped agonising over every little thing, analysing every sentence and getting paranoid because they haven't done it all 'right', it would probably sort itself out.

[LiftingIsLife]

... It seems to me that for every guy that likes big boobs there's a guy who likes tiny/no boobs, for every woman who puts a 6-pack as no1 there's one that loves skinny guys and one that thinks chubbies are adoreable, for every person that wants to marry a lawyer there's one that absolutely doesn't care about the partners career/finances, for everyone that wants to be with a priest there's someone who prefers delinquents... And the list goes on.

What do ya'll think about it?

VERY astute observation. some of the most obvious 'old sayings' which
do, indeed, apply here are:

(1) there are plenty of fish in the sea
(2) there is SOMEBODY for EVERYBODY
(3) dont let the door hit you in the arse

(oh well, the first 2 anyway )

seriously, everyone is attracted to different things, and if you live
long enough (re: get enough experience), you will be confident enough
in WHO YOU ARE to wait until you find the right person. i wish i could
say i followed my own advice for my entire life, but alas, i was too
ignorant and too immature when i was young to do so.
as a result, i married who i THOUGHT would be good for me, and ended up
living the last 10 years of my 20+ married years, wondering how the
hell i endedup with who i was with.
luckily, when i reached my late 40s, i realized there were others out there that were a WAY better match for me, and i got out while i could.
i learned alot thru those not-so-happy-years, but looking back, i probably wouldnt have believed the same facts/ideas if someone had 'tried to teach me' when i was young.

in any case, i'm VERY VERY happy with my little love now, and its a COMBO of all that is her that i love. of course, its surely helps that she is not only adorable and lovable, but has a sex drive even higher than my own

best,
~lifer

[01012007]

There is someone for everyone. I ended up marrying Meatloaf's twin brother. I met him on the internet whilst I was whining about being single and how much I hated men because I got run over by two guys (yes literally!) going after this gorgeous mam *LOL*