I have no problems with my girlfriend talking to other guys as it's pretty harmless and I don't want to be a controlling freak.
My problem is she can send out the wrong message to guys, even leading them on, but doesn't see any harm in it whatsover. She's a super sweet girl and doesn't like to burn potential friendships or be mean to people. She feels like she has to say "I can't talk to you because my boyfriend won't let me" which is ridiculous.
She never tells guys to back off because she doesn't want to hurt their feelings.
As an example, we were at this party start of the year and this dude was all flirty with my gf in front of me. Didn't bother me that much even tho the guy is a bit of douche doing it infront me of.
Now, about 4-5 months on, I've seen him txting her and emailing her etc. and she doesn't put him in his place. If it were me i'd say "Look, I have a girlfriend. I'm not interested"
but she'll pussyfoot around it so he still thinks he has a chance
Makes me uncomfortable that tons of dudes want to **** my gf and think they have a chance because she's no nice to them and doesn't tell them to back off. How do I deal with this without coming off insecure. She doesn't see my side of it at all
05-20-2011, 05:33 AM #1
girlfriend seeks too much attention from guyshttp://forum.bodybuilding.com/showpost.php?p=8838050&postcount=49
05-20-2011, 05:39 AM #2
05-20-2011, 05:41 AM #3
I know that feel bro. My GF is exactly the same, I already confronted her about it, analyzed her actions and explained it to her and came to conclusion she is an attention whore and all she said was: "yeah you're right, but I like the attention." I facepalmed and didn't bother bringing up the subject ever again. You just have to learn not to care or do the same thing with other girls in front of her, give her the taste of her own medicine. Mine gets super jealous.
05-20-2011, 05:42 AM #4
05-20-2011, 05:52 AM #5
05-20-2011, 05:54 AM #6
my girlfriend has some male friends who are her girlfriends boyfriends or in the same group....
and other are my friends.
she doesnt talk to any random guys...and if he makes a move she tells them she has a boyfriend.
and all attention..she seeks from me only.
my ex was totally opposite..she would never tell a guy she had a boyfriend...and seeked attention from other guys.
my ex was a cheating fat slut
05-20-2011, 05:55 AM #7
05-20-2011, 06:06 AM #8
Wow OP have some self respect dude, don't expect her to respect you when you don't respect yourself.
You:"Honey, I'm uncomfortable that guys who tried to phuck you in front of me still try to hook up with you and are in contact and you're entertaining their proposals and probably phucking them, and keeping them as a viable monkey branch should I no longer satisfy your princess needs"
05-20-2011, 06:22 AM #9
05-20-2011, 06:23 AM #10
05-20-2011, 06:26 AM #11
05-20-2011, 07:16 AM #12
It sucks to even think about breaking up with her. Everything else in the relationship is great, it's just this one small thing that bothers me and for some reason she does not see my side of it at all.
Every time we talk about it, she plays it off as completely harmless, how she should be able to talk to people if she wants and I'm just overractinghttp://forum.bodybuilding.com/showpost.php?p=8838050&postcount=49
05-20-2011, 07:19 AM #13
05-20-2011, 07:29 AM #14
05-20-2011, 07:51 AM #15
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This thread reminds me of a convo I had last week with a chick for 15 mins or so. We're just talking and she is being flirty, touching me etc. She takes me to meet her friends and while she was talking to one of her other friends her other friend comes up to me and says you know she has a bf, right? I said that well he must not mean much if she failed to bring him up after talking with me for over 15 mins.
If she really cared she would had brought him up almost immediately.
Last edited by NYY; 05-20-2011 at 07:53 AM. Reason: Typing on iPhone stinks.**New Jersey Crew (732)**
Don't run with the herd, run away from it.
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05-20-2011, 07:59 AM #16
She isn't necessarily gonna cheat(need to know more to judge), but she is definitely a low self esteem girl.
If it is just a low self esteem thing then she needs to gain confidence and stop being a doormat to strangers. If she isn't willing to work on it and it bothers you(as it would me) then you don't really have a whole lot of choice on what to do.
Try talking again. Be a man. Demand respect. If she won't give it to you find someone that will. Last thing you want is to be laying in bed with your girl trying to have a moment and dudes are blowing her up.-I need a phone booth*
*New York Giants fan
05-20-2011, 08:09 AM #17
05-20-2011, 08:26 AM #18
Damn man. Show some self respect.
Right now you sort of remind me of the spineless guy in Boogie Nights (the one who eventually flips out and commits the murder/suicide with his wife) when he sees his wife f*cking some other guy in the driveway surrounded by a crowd watching and he responds with some mealy mouthed version of "I'm not sure I am comfortable with this... c'mom, stop!!!".
Stop trying to "talk" to her about it. She knows what she's doing and she obviously has no respect for you.
The only question now is are you going to start showing some respect for yourself and ditch her?F*ck Kidney Cancer
"The only thing that gives you strength is pain" - Higher Peaks
"I am wounded but am not slain. I will lie down to rest awhile, but will rise to fight again." - Anonymous
05-20-2011, 08:38 AM #19
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05-20-2011, 08:45 AM #20
05-20-2011, 09:05 AM #21
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Sometimes girls think that by being "soft" and cutsey about a guy's advances that it'll hurt their feelings less or avoid the rejection that is inflicted when we say no.
But in reality, like you said, this just leads them on, and THIS will actually hurt men's feelings more than just saying no from the get go.
It's a classic misinterpretation between men and women and it's been going on for ages.
Though the fact that she doesnt say she has a boyfriend is really bad. Even at my most spineless stage of youth, I at least always disclosed that information.
She needs to grow a pair. Plus its SUPER disrespectful to you. Nuff said.
05-20-2011, 09:07 AM #22
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The sooner you learn this concept the sooner you'll have better, more satisfying, productive relationships instead of dramatic ones:
Your views on respect in a relationship NEED TO coincide.
If she thinks its fine to flirt and you don't, she doesn't take relationships as seriously as you do. You absolutely need to break up with her and find someone on the same wavelength as you... staying with her will only make you a complacent, doormat bitch while she gets tons of attention from guys.
It's respect man! Any girl that thinks its ok to flirt with guys while she has a bf is shady. Like you said, it's really not that hard to be like "I have a bf" and turn around and leave. In fact, if any gf of mine DIDN'T say that, we'd instantly both be single. I won't put up with that sht.
break up with her op.Common Sense Crew
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05-20-2011, 09:12 AM #23
dated a girl exactly like this before, but she was a little worse (didnt see anything wrong with grinding with random guys or some random dude kissing her on the cheek at a club)
long story short she was an attention whore and even tho when u confront her she may "try to change", she wont bc SHE doesnt see anything wrong with it, the only reason she would change is to make u happy and she'll feel like ur controlling her.
05-20-2011, 09:14 AM #24
I have a difficult time with women like this, it's like the ones that go into bars and can't keep those boys away...BS, body language is rather simple, you guys know when you are approaching a woman that has "move on" written all over her....
Completely immature and disrespectful, she is lucky to have you, most men would have kicked her..and her little problem, to the curb by now.
05-20-2011, 10:01 AM #25
Not cool on her part, she sounds immature and not ready for a real relationship. Drop her and move on.
I can speak from experience on this, I dated a younger girl for 3+ years who started out this way and I kept putting up with it. She eventually burned me hard, twice. Once a slut, ALWAYS a slut.Lee Priest for President
05-20-2011, 10:08 AM #26
05-20-2011, 01:32 PM #27
Ditch the bitch.
05-20-2011, 04:51 PM #28
05-20-2011, 05:14 PM #29
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I've been in this type of relationship and I've seen it happen to other dudes, gtfo out now to save yourself a lot of heartache and grief
Girls like that take a LONG time to grow up and realize what they are doing is wrong, and some of them will never change, don't waste your time with that type of girl👑👑👑
05-20-2011, 06:11 PM #30
Op how many relationhips has your gf been in? And has she always gotten alot of attention from guys? Or is this relatively new too her? Also Id be upfront with her, keeping how her actions are making you feel to yourself will only make it worse for you. Dont be emotional or dramatic about it, but just calmly tell her maybe if she shouldn't entertain other guys.why you at the bar if you aint poppin the bottles?
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