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  1. #1
    Bulking to 175 LiveOnce's Avatar
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    Question How to overcome insecurity of girlfriend going out with her friends?

    How do I overcome not wanting my gf to go out with her girlfriends? She has probably gone out with her girlfriend once in the last 6 months and I always want to text her and never give her space when she is out like this. This Saturday she is going to go out w 2 girlfriends of hers that are single and trying to find a man. Should I be worried about her going out like this or am I just being insecure? I feel I am being selfish because I want her all to myself and want to be the one having fun with her. Also, she has never given me a reason to question her trust or anything like that. Basically, i know how guys are when they see a group of girls out...

    Any thoughts?
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  2. #2
    Registered User jimbong's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by LiveOnce View Post
    How do I overcome not wanting my gf to go out with her girlfriends? She has probably gone out with her girlfriend once in the last 6 months and I always want to text her and never give her space when she is out like this. This Saturday she is going to go out w 2 girlfriends of hers that are single and trying to find a man. Should I be worried about her going out like this or am I just being insecure? I feel I am being selfish because I want her all to myself and want to be the one having fun with her. Also, she has never given me a reason to question her trust or anything like that. Basically, i know how guys are when they see a group of girls out...

    Any thoughts?
    Yes, quit acting like a bitch, let her go have her fun. Why don't you organize a boy's night out? From the sound of your post you have probably been neglecting them. The space will be good for your relationship.
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  3. #3
    Bulking to 175 LiveOnce's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by jimbong View Post
    Yes, quit acting like a bitch, let her go have her fun. Why don't you organize a boy's night out? From the sound of your post you have probably been neglecting them. The space will be good for your relationship.
    I agree, i am acting like a bitch. We spend EVERY night together so she does need to go out with her friends. Boy's night out is not that easy. I moved to a new city and started dating this girl, and with the amount of time we spend together i really only have 1 or 2 guy friends here...I should be thankful she puts up with me haha!
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  4. #4
    yes... 'tones digitalbath11's Avatar
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    Whether you trust her or not, you cant keep her indoors and away from her friends.

    I understand the concern and the BS associated with women going out clubbing and sheet, but if your girl is good, she WONT fkuc around. If she is not, then she'll be doing you a favor by showing her true colors.

    My ex was like this too. Except hat I wouldnt go clubbing. He'd blow up my phone during my art classes that I would take with girlfriends. My hands would be literally covered in paint or clay and he'd call me until I could wash my hands and answer the fkn phone. It was ridiculous now that I have more perspective.

    Its up to you OP. I suggest you go out with some friends and keep busy. Dont sit and wait and let your thoughts get the best of you.
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  5. #5
    scientist genius pimp Caesar735's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by LiveOnce View Post
    I agree, i am acting like a bitch. We spend EVERY night together so she does need to go out with her friends. Boy's night out is not that easy. I moved to a new city and started dating this girl, and with the amount of time we spend together i really only have 1 or 2 guy friends here...I should be thankful she puts up with me haha!
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  6. #6
    i'll put it in KenStiffyJr's Avatar
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    FIRSTLY



    Originally Posted by LiveOnce View Post
    How do I overcome not wanting my gf to go out with her girlfriends? She has probably gone out with her girlfriend once in the last 6 months and I always want to text her and never give her space when she is out like this.
    LOL right off the bat, this relationship wont last. How bout you fcking go out with YOUR friends instead of being a little phaggot? How bout u dont text her AT ALL when shes out. Tell her to have fun and she'll text you when shes home.

    Originally Posted by LiveOnce View Post
    This Saturday she is going to go out w 2 girlfriends of hers that are single and trying to find a man.
    Instead of "trying to find a man", could it be that maybe her 2 girlfriends would like to have fun with their friend who you obviously have locked down while dating her? Im sure they are all telling her what a controlling freak you are, and cant wait to show her what shes been missing while being tied down to your punkass

    Originally Posted by LiveOnce View Post
    Should I be worried about her going out like this or am I just being insecure?


    is this a serious question? your unsure whether or not your being insecure?

    Originally Posted by LiveOnce View Post
    I feel I am being selfish because I want her all to myself and want to be the one having fun with her.


    i want to punch you directly in the face.

    Originally Posted by LiveOnce View Post
    Also, she has never given me a reason to question her trust or anything like that.
    so THEN WTF IS THE ISSUE BRO? How bout you just trust her. How bout, once in a while YOU MAKE YOUR OWN PLANS AND DO SOMETHING WITHOUT HER. How bout you GROW UP? Oh wait your 24. My god you suck.

    Originally Posted by LiveOnce View Post
    Basically, i know how guys are when they see a group of girls out...
    AND? So what? you know how GUYS are. do you know how your GIRLFRIEND is? If she acts on this guys that approach her, then she did you a favor. She wasnt the right one. My god

    Originally Posted by LiveOnce View Post
    Any thoughts?
    i hope she breaks up with you for realizing that your a controlling, insecure, phaggot and then i hope you post your heartbreak on this forum so we can all laugh at you.



    Finally


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  7. #7
    Registered User xSCMxKeraed's Avatar
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    Don't hate...masturbate!


    But seriously OP go out with your friends. I remember when I was a mere child of 15 (lol) I was like you. And I lost her because of it. As I grew up and worked on my jealousy, I just started looking forward to her going out. Why?

    Free pass for me to go out...she can't get mad that I'm out with me boys if she's out with her girls right?
    It gives you something to talk about. Which is nice cuz let's face it spending every second together you will stop running out of new things to talk about.
    Let's you unwind from the stress of a relationship. Yes every relationship is stressful no matter how perfect and now you have "you time"
    When both people are happy, you bond much easier. If she has a good night out and you have a good night out you are both more receptive to each other. Talking is easier, happiness will remove any pointless issues and therefore you can look past silly things and forgive any outstanding fights (silly ones) and generally higher chance of sex. (Of course I had to mention that)

    I will warn you though this is a generalization. Some people hold grudges so unless your both mature the fighting may continue.
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  8. #8
    Rep Power: 1714753 MYNAMEISBERT's Avatar
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    make sure you let her got out, give her a few texts just to make sure shes ok, or got the taxi back to her girlfriends house and shes ok.


    dont NOT text her because she will moan the next day about you not giving a ****.

    i let my gf go out one night with all her friends and i stayed in and went to bed. she blew up my fone with texts the whole night asking wtf i was doing??? sometimes you just cant win bro
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  9. #9
    i'll put it in KenStiffyJr's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by MYNAMEISBERT View Post
    .

    i let my gf go out one night with all her friends and i stayed in and went to bed. she blew up my fone with texts the whole night asking wtf i was doing??? sometimes you just cant win bro

    you LET your gf go out one night lol. what do you own her?

    you people are pathetic and are exactly the type of people that get cheated on
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  10. #10
    Rep Power: 1714753 MYNAMEISBERT's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by KenStiffyJr View Post
    you LET your gf go out one night lol. what do you own her?

    you people are pathetic and are exactly the type of people that get cheated on
    lol no i explained that wrong. she goes out when ever she likes with whoever she wants.

    i was describing one instance when i didnt text her while she was clubbing.
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  11. #11
    Registered User xSCMxKeraed's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by KenStiffyJr View Post
    you LET your gf go out one night lol. what do you own her?

    you people are pathetic and are exactly the type of people that get cheated on
    Lol you were a womens activist in a previous life weren't you lol (no srs)

    You speak the truth. But then again I have been cheated on in relationships where we both did our own thing and didn't constantly check up on each other. Of course it was a case of "not enough attention" when she was gone 80 hrs outta the week hahaahah.
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  12. #12
    i'll put it in KenStiffyJr's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by xSCMxKeraed View Post
    Lol you were a womens activist in a previous life weren't you lol (no srs)

    You speak the truth. But then again I have been cheated on in relationships where we both did our own thing and didn't constantly check up on each other. Of course it was a case of "not enough attention" when she was gone 80 hrs outta the week hahaahah.
    But in that case, then its the girl and not anything you can do.

    cheaters gon cheat
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  13. #13
    Registered User xSCMxKeraed's Avatar
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    Amen to that
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  14. #14
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    So trust is earned, in time as she does more of this and you see that she is behaving in accordance with the boundaries of your relationship you will feel more at ease. It takes time and deserving behavior.....give her the opportunity to earn your trust!
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    - I don't let my girl go out to bars or clubs unless its a good friend's birthday
    -- GF agrees that its not appropriate for a woman who is taken to be in those settings.

    - I don't let my girl drink in my absence
    --- Alcohol impairs judgment

    That being said my girl hangs out with her friends at the mall, bowling, shopping, the movies, etc etc and not a single fuk is given on those days. She's not drinking, she's not at places where there's a bunch of drunk dudes.

    Lesson: Talk about these things next time you get into a relationship. Its too late at this point.
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  17. #17
    Registered User rob112's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by SoundnTheFury View Post
    I started cracking up when I saw this.

    OP space is good. If you trust her then let her go out and just keep yourself occupied. Don't get crazy unless she gives you a reason to, otherwise she will probably dump you for being insecure and smothering her. Keep yourself busy, go out with the boys.

    EDIT: Especially since it's only once in a while. If she was going out getting hammered every weekend it would be a different story.
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  18. #18
    not srs Frrnckk's Avatar
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    Strong insecurities. How about you work on being so awesome she won't even look at other guys? Also you really need to get some bros, srs. Hanging around one single girl all the time isn't good for your health.

    With the way you're acting now, your gf will indeed end up suking another dick and you'll soon be left miserable to deal with a very emotional breakup.
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    Originally Posted by LiveOnce View Post
    How do I overcome not wanting my gf to go out with her girlfriends? She has probably gone out with her girlfriend once in the last 6 months and I always want to text her and never give her space when she is out like this. This Saturday she is going to go out w 2 girlfriends of hers that are single and trying to find a man. Should I be worried about her going out like this or am I just being insecure? I feel I am being selfish because I want her all to myself and want to be the one having fun with her. Also, she has never given me a reason to question her trust or anything like that. Basically, i know how guys are when they see a group of girls out...

    Any thoughts?
    Feelings are like surfing. You know your probably going to fall or **** up. You feel the waves but, you just sort of go with them. Do your part not to lose your mind or snap out.

    Let her go out. If she ****s up or breaks your trust and or you doubt her, kick her to the curb.
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    Originally Posted by Frrnckk View Post
    Strong insecurities. How about you work on being so awesome she won't even look at other guys?
    Lol that's easy to say but mate guarding tactics have been invented for a reason...80-90% of dudes can't be as awesome as the other 10-20%. This is reality.
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  21. #21
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    Originally Posted by ll ReNeGaDe ll View Post
    - I don't let my girl go out to bars or clubs unless its a good friend's birthday
    -- GF agrees that its not appropriate for a woman who is taken to be in those settings.

    - I don't let my girl drink in my absence
    --- Alcohol impairs judgment

    That being said my girl hangs out with her friends at the mall, bowling, shopping, the movies, etc etc and not a single fuk is given on those days. She's not drinking, she's not at places where there's a bunch of drunk dudes.

    Lesson: Talk about these things next time you get into a relationship. Its too late at this point.
    OK Dad.
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  22. #22
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    Don't worry about it. Srs. It is only gonna eat at ya, so say eff it and just relax.

    Edit: I wish my lady went out with her girlfriends more often. We are always going out together, which while it's fun, it would be nice if she did her thing and I did my thing with my friends only. Both are equally fun when they are balanced out....
    Last edited by liferzach; 03-25-2011 at 01:34 PM.
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    Rustling your jimmies ll ReNeGaDe ll's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Frrnckk View Post
    Strong insecurities. How about you work on being so awesome she won't even look at other guys?
    ^ This is a common error in thinking for most males. A lot of women who talk about their experiences cheating talk about how perfect their husbands are. They just wanted another c0ck in their mouth, or they were just bored, or they were just drunk, or they were just caught up in the moment, etc....

    Originally Posted by clifftime View Post
    OK Dad.
    You can say that in response to any dominant male who takes charge. Dominance is still undoubtedly attractive to women.
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    Originally Posted by ll ReNeGaDe ll View Post
    ^ This is a common error in thinking for most males. A lot of women who talk about their experiences cheating talk about how perfect their husbands are. They just wanted another c0ck in their mouth, or they were just bored, or they were just drunk, or they were just caught up in the moment, etc....



    You can say that in response to any dominant male who takes charge. Dominance is still undoubtedly attractive to women.
    Whilst we obviously disagree on most of these issues...I agree that not being a little biatch about this kind of stuff is what needs to happen. And the pussification of america continues.....
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    Originally Posted by digitalbath11 View Post
    Whether you trust her or not, you cant keep her indoors and away from her friends.

    I understand the concern and the BS associated with women going out clubbing and sheet, but if your girl is good, she WONT fkuc around. If she is not, then she'll be doing you a favor by showing her true colors.

    My ex was like this too. Except hat I wouldnt go clubbing. He'd blow up my phone during my art classes that I would take with girlfriends. My hands would be literally covered in paint or clay and he'd call me until I could wash my hands and answer the fkn phone. It was ridiculous now that I have more perspective.

    Its up to you OP. I suggest you go out with some friends and keep busy. Dont sit and wait and let your thoughts get the best of you.
    I agree. If you don't trust her, don't be with her. Trying to have her on locked down just reeks of insecurities and neediness. And guess what? She will **** and do whatever the **** she wants one way or another. She'll just be more sneaky and conniving about it.

    Like I said before guys, just draw the line. If she crosses the line, she is out. She wants to hang with her whore friends and hit the clubs without under wear, PEACE. If she doesn't cross the line but, she tests me to see how far she can push it, and or come close to the line, she is out. Be a man of principles. Set your limits, be willing to walk, and sort of like the thread Cesar made: BE THE MANS MAN. If your the MAN your willing to drop the girl if she isn't up to standards.

    Simply put, if you cannot trust her to go out, live her life, have friends, you should simply not be with her. As for alcohol, there are no excuses. Alcohol is an inhibitor. It makes you do what you already want to do. Alcohol doesn't force you into anything. You act upon it so, if a girl ****s the hockey team, she is a whore, and that is what she wanted. If a guy cheats, he choose that, and there are no excuses.
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    Originally Posted by ll ReNeGaDe ll View Post



    You can say that in response to any dominant male who takes charge. Dominance is still undoubtedly attractive to women.
    We all have our different ways I guess.

    I'm not my girlfriend's dad, therefore I don't act like my girlfriends dad. I am in no way attracted to the type of girl who would put up with this bullsh*t anyway.
    What kinda chicks you date brah?

    She goes out with friends? That's GREAT! Gives me time to hang out with mine.
    She is a grown-up. If my GF wasn't mature enough to control her actions... Well, she wouldn't be my girlfriend for long.
    I'm not interested in treating a GF like I was raising a daughter.

    Are you mormon? Just curious.
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  27. #27
    Bulking to 175 LiveOnce's Avatar
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    Like i said guys, i think it all stems from me being new to the area and spending every countless second with her--thus meaning not many guy friends for me...

    I've never really been in a relationship before, so i am sure that has something to do with it especially after seeing the horror stories my friends have been thru w their girlfriends.

    She never goes out clubbing or anything like that. Just maybe a dive bar with a girlfriend or two....That is all.

    Definitely think i am being too overprotective...and a p*ssy at that!
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    Originally Posted by clifftime View Post
    We all have our different ways I guess.

    I'm not my girlfriend's dad, therefore I don't act like my girlfriends dad. I am in no way attracted to the type of girl who would put up with this bullsh*t anyway.
    What kinda chicks you date brah?

    She goes out with friends? That's GREAT! Gives me time to hang out with mine.
    She is a grown-up. If my GF wasn't mature enough to control her actions... Well, she wouldn't be my girlfriend for long.
    I'm not interested in treating a GF like I was raising a daughter.

    Are you mormon? Just curious.
    PM me later. I owe you reps brah. Says I need to spread some around before I rep you again lol Prob repped you for inspirational 01's pof account ^ advice.

    I totally agree. If I see a girl, she goes on vaca or whatever, hooks up, she ain't my problem. I'll be hooking up with her friends, sister, mom, etc or looking to any way. Till I am committed, I keep at it nonstop. Not as much recently unfortunately. Other priorities going on (health issues) but, looking to get out with the girls before the month is over.

    I totally agree with having space so, her not having a life is a hindrance. An even bigger hindrance is bringing a girl into your life, into your social life, your personal life like hobbies, marital arts, boxing clubs, sports teams, etc cause, if **** goes wrong, out of spite, she'll be trying to get at your friends. Worst of all, if you guys split, she'll get it twisted and think your friends are her friends. Seen friends go through this and I made a mental note of it all. Not looking to be her daddy. If I say even the mildest thing in regards to "Drive home safe," which could be deemed weak or daddy like (parapraxis is my defense), I'll come back with, "and keep a lookout for creepy old men in the area offering you candy back at their gingerbread house."

    I think the biggest mistake men make is seeing movies, "you can't take my girl" (deep purple), Jersey Shore mentality, bar fight or cry over your gf. Its funny. I let the girl do whatever the **** she wants and if she ****s up or crosses the line, I disregard her as a gf. If she is someone I am seeing, I next her and start hitting on her friends, her sisters, mom, and so on.

    Originally Posted by LiveOnce View Post
    Like i said guys, i think it all stems from me being new to the area and spending every countless second with her--thus meaning not many guy friends for me...

    I've never really been in a relationship before, so i am sure that has something to do with it especially after seeing the horror stories my friends have been thru w their girlfriends.

    She never goes out clubbing or anything like that. Just maybe a dive bar with a girlfriend or two....That is all.

    Definitely think i am being too overprotective...and a p*ssy at that!
    Brah, that is even worse then a club. I would rather my gf hit a posh, up scale club any day, then hitting up a dive bar. Places are full of chaves and wanna be gangsters, bar fights, and low lives. Just draw the line. If she crosses it or comes close to it just to **** with you, you got let her go, and not take her back. Once you set your flag and put your foot down, you cannot look back, and or second guess it. If you do, you forever ****ed up in her eyes as a man, and she'll never respect you again.
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    Rustling your jimmies ll ReNeGaDe ll's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by clifftime

    We all have our different ways I guess.

    I'm not my girlfriend's dad, therefore I don't act like my girlfriends dad. I am in no way attracted to the type of girl who would put up with this bullsh*t anyway.
    What kinda chicks you date brah?

    She goes out with friends? That's GREAT! Gives me time to hang out with mine.
    She is a grown-up. If my GF wasn't mature enough to control her actions... Well, she wouldn't be my girlfriend for long.
    I'm not interested in treating a GF like I was raising a daughter.

    Are you mormon? Just curious.
    I'm agnostic actually, and I used to think like you until I became more educated on the nature of women.

    Again, you keep referring to being a dominant male as being "her dad." This is the same twisted logic feminists use not to cook for a man. "Why should I cook for him? I'm not his mother I'm his wife. What kind of guys, young lady? Guys that enjoy being treated like children?"

    Just because two situations have similarities it does not mean they're similar.


    I don't know why you brought up your gf going out with her friends. I already stated she can go out with her friends and not a single fuk will be given that day. Clubs/bars however, are completely inappropriate for women in a relationship. I don't have to be dominant she already knows this. That's the difference between a girl who you wife up and a girl you just want to fuk.






    ...




    BTW, is anyone else's "reply" button fuked up? I'm trying to figure out if its my computer or the website... I have to click it like 10 times to reply..
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    Originally Posted by ll ReNeGaDe ll View Post
    I'm agnostic actually, and I used to think like you until I became more educated on the nature of women.

    Again, you keep referring to being a dominant male as being "her dad." This is the same twisted logic feminists use not to cook for a man. "Why should I cook for him? I'm not his mother I'm his wife. What kind of guys, young lady? Guys that enjoy being treated like children?"

    Just because two situations have similarities it does not mean they're similar.


    I don't know why you brought up your gf going out with her friends. I already stated she can go out with her friends and not a single fuk will be given that day. Clubs/bars however, are completely inappropriate for women in a relationship. I don't have to be dominant she already knows this. That's the difference between a girl who you wife up and a girl you just want to fuk.






    ...
    No, I think women should fall in line of gender roles. A nurse or something alike. I would be turned off working a desk job for business and my wife was doing construction. LOL

    I literally LOL'd at the thought of me doing desk work for business and she is digging up pavement.

    I sort of expect an old school girl, cook, cleaning, low kills, pretty, whole some, doesn't talk like a trucker, knows her role etc.

    I am not calling you out brah I am just adding to the debate for the record. I hit the clubs in a relationship. i don't think a relationship means, living under a rock or wearing ****ing sweat pants and becoming a slob. I still get out, do the whole fight nights with the guys, and live it up. This includes talking to the opposite sex. Its a given. I wont cheat. Still, if I am an attractive, out going guy, I got soft if I stop the sec I become in a relationship. It was what attracted her to me in the first place. She knows I can have other girls but, I picked her for now any way.



    BTW, is anyone else's "reply" button fuked up? I'm trying to figure out if its my computer or the website... I have to click it like 10 times to reply..
    Might be your computer brah. Mine is fine.
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    By orcan in forum Relationships and Relationship Help
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