Embarassing but sometimes my anus gets chapped and it hurts like fuk... i think it's just from sweating alot cause i'm a good wiper... Why the feck does that happen to me, not down with this painful swass.
03-10-2011, 09:04 PM #1
03-10-2011, 09:06 PM #2
- Join Date: Jan 2008
- Location: Pennsylvania, United States
- Age: 29
- Stats: 6'1", 190 lbs
- Posts: 2,722
- Rep Power: 791
03-10-2011, 09:06 PM #3
03-10-2011, 09:07 PM #4
03-10-2011, 09:07 PM #5
- Join Date: Nov 2009
- Location: Virginia, United States
- Stats: 5'2", 135 lbs
- Posts: 4,039
- Rep Power: 26094
03-10-2011, 09:07 PM #6
03-10-2011, 09:08 PM #7
03-10-2011, 09:08 PM #8
03-10-2011, 09:08 PM #9
03-10-2011, 09:08 PM #10
03-10-2011, 09:09 PM #11
- Join Date: Feb 2010
- Location: where the Grass is Green and the Girls are pretty, SoCal, Greenland
- Stats: 5'10", 175 lbs
- Posts: 23,386
- Rep Power: 14771
wear diapers to keep the moisture inMISCing since 2005
MISC cause of death: repwhoring, whiteknighting, lack of creativity/originality from '08-'10 join dates
"Some people say he never reps back. I knew there was only one way to find out so I repped him and he repped me back." -Ronnie Coleman
Master Pre and Post Workout Race
Pre-Workout: Caffeine + Coconut Oil
Post-Workout: 6g Spirulina + 3g Chlorella + 3oz Water
03-10-2011, 09:09 PM #12
03-10-2011, 09:10 PM #13
- Join Date: Sep 2006
- Location: Texas, United States
- Age: 25
- Posts: 6,887
- BodyPoints: 2312
- Rep Power: 2730
-try to take your ****s before you shower, then after whiping with paper, get in the shower, clean up, then whipe your anus hole with soap, water, and a wash rag.
-when ****ting between showers, try to use baby whipes for a deeper cleaning. remember, if your not using something wet then your just smearing sh it grease around.
-if no baby whipes, try to use wet paper towels or something.
-baby powder your as s hole after drying.
-for times when you already have swamp ass and got chapped ass from it, thoroughly clean butt hole, then apply some kind of ass cream (like desitin)2wheel crew
03-10-2011, 09:11 PM #14
Don't Shave That Hair!!!
I have recently made a mistake in my life, and I offer my story to you, that you may learn from my error. It all started, as many things do, with me having trouble ****ting.
No, I was not constipated; this was not a regularity problem but a matter of technique. It seems my ass-hair had grown to such a length that tiny grogans were constantly getting tied up in the matted jungle between my asscheeks. It led to much frustration, with me KNOWING that I still had something to drop, but unable to shake the tenacious turd loose from its butthair dwelling. Eventually I would have to do two things: either reach down with some paper and try to pinch off the lingering loaf (which required careful precision to avoid smearing the creature all over my rear, especially since I had no way of seeing what I was doing) or just go for broke, start wiping, and hope that I could remove all the leftover fecal matter before the toilet paper reached its Can't-Be-Flushed threshold.
I was contemplating this problem, when I had what seemed at the time to be a bright idea. "Hey! This is my butt and my butt-hair, right? So why don't I just eliminate all the hair, and then my grogans will flow out like beer from a keg!" I said to myself. It is a statement that will go down in history with a lot of other regretted statements. "How many Indians could there be?" said by General Custer. "Looks like a good day for a drive!" by JFK. "There! America On-Line now has complete Usenet access!" by some idiot system tech. Such was my anal shaving idea.
I performed the operation that night, with a cheap disposable razor and a towel to sit on. Starting from the bottom, and shaving from the crack to the cheeks, I began the arduous process of ridding my ass of hair. Occassionally, I would have to clean the razor of accumulated hair and miscellaneous slime, which I did by wiping it on the towel. Slowly, my twin mounds and the between-ravine began to resemble the hairless cheeks of a newborn baby. Finally, I wiped the razor one last time, and surveyed my work. The towel was covered with a pile of hair. My ass was smooth as ivory. I smiled, satisfied, thinking my troubles were over.
Little did I know.
I now have a great respect for anal-hair. Like everything in this world God created, it has its mighty purpose in existence. It was only after I had removed it that I started to learn how much I had been taking it for granted. For one, it provides friction. I learned this the next day, when I walked out into the sun heading for class. After climbing two flights of stairs and starting to sweat, I started to notice something unpleasant. The sweat was accumulating in my crack, and was causing the unpleasant sensation of my two asscheeks sliding past each other with every step. I thought about going to the bathroom and wiping it off, but had to get to class. Eventually, I thought, it would dry.
Unfortunately, it did dry, but only after mingling with the microscopic ****- molecules lingering around my brown starfish. When I stood up after class, my cheeks were stuck together with a slimy sticky ****/sweat combination. As I made my way back to my dorm, it started to itch. God-DAMN, did it itch! Felt like a swarm of ants was making its way up and down my crack. Fighting to keep from jamming my hand down there and scratching away, I rushed back to the dorm.
Unfortunately again, this exertion caused me to sweat, and when I finally reached my room, my cheeks were sliding back and forth against each other like a pair of horny cane-toads. I quickly dropped my pants, and attempted to dry my ass off by sticking it in front of a fan and spreading my cheeks. As I pulled the two mounds of flesh apart, a horrible stench burst free and filled the room. Every dog within a 4 block radius started to howl. I had it worst of all, as the ripe aroma of festering ****/sweat went into the fan and blew back into my face. I fought to keep from heaving. And as I sat there, fighting vomit, my ass cheeks spread and dripping, with the concentrated aroma of my body odor mixed with the tangy smell of my own **** blowing right into my face, I had only one thought: "It will be like this until the hair grows back. Weeks."
Later on, trying to deal as best I could, wiping my ass at every opportunity, I discovered another wonderful use for ass-hair - ventilation. I attempted to launch a fart, only to have it get stuck between my asscheeks. Apparently, with no hair, the two pink twins can get vacuum sealed together, and the result was a frustrating fart that slid up and down between my cheeks like a lost gerbil.
As if that wasn't enough, I am now enduring further torture. As anyone who has ever shaved anything knows, when hair is first growing in, it comes in as stubble. Imagine your ass having the texture of a brillo pad. Well, that is what I am dealing with now. It is a hellish torture, and there are many times when I just look out the window and contemplate why I shouldn't just jump out and get it all over with in one fleshy splat, rather than endure this constant agony.
Friends, DON'T SHAVE YOUR ASS-HAIR!
BTW not me found on craigs list lol
03-10-2011, 09:11 PM #15
03-10-2011, 09:11 PM #16
- Join Date: Aug 2009
- Location: Florida, United States
- Stats: 5'6", 165 lbs
- Posts: 11,375
- Rep Power: 12815
03-10-2011, 09:13 PM #17
Dont shave it, and try baby powder/vaseline (srs,no homo)Instagram: instagram.com/BTC6666
lee priest crew
jayson giovani crew
only go to jason blahas vids to read the comments crew
sniffed hard as fuaark when girl walked by to see if that miscer who had that as his crews could really smell her vag crew
03-10-2011, 09:13 PM #18
03-10-2011, 09:16 PM #19
03-10-2011, 09:20 PM #20
03-10-2011, 09:23 PM #21
03-10-2011, 09:32 PM #22
- Join Date: Feb 2011
- Location: Perth, Western Australia, Australia
- Age: 28
- Stats: 5'8", 175 lbs
- Posts: 619
- Rep Power: 133
By epl2000 in forum Misc.Replies: 21Last Post: 05-12-2009, 12:51 AM
By FSUFan4 in forum Relationships and Relationship HelpReplies: 9Last Post: 02-27-2009, 09:49 AM
By Colonel_Clobber in forum Misc.Replies: 15Last Post: 02-20-2008, 06:07 PM
By T.I.T.A.N. in forum Relationships and Relationship HelpReplies: 31Last Post: 07-05-2007, 10:15 AM
By MonsterG8r in forum Religion / PoliticsReplies: 0Last Post: 02-12-2007, 06:59 PM