Dumbest/stupidest thing you've said to a cop.

[Bearded_Freak]

Cop pulls me over, I was 14.


Cop: You look to young to be driving, you don't even look like you shave

Me: I started when I was 16.

Cop: Have a good night

[fiveplusfour]

[Endgame]

Never said it, but:

"As a taxpayer, I pay your salary."

[godsamurai]

That was my first time.

Also, I was at a pub with my bro in law and there were a couple of cops just chillin.

Broinlaw: "Hey can you season my steak with your pepper spray?"
Cop: ".........."

lawlz

[Jaroctor]

Is there an officer problem?

[Bababooey100]

I called one a buzz cut cowboy a few weeks back. It was some early 20's **** head rookie. He pulled me over for tinted windows I'm fully legal. When ever I can push a cops buttons I do it.

[Skeptical_Hippo]

when i was 16 the cops raided a local bar that always let underage kids buy alcohol.

Cop: how old are you?

me: ...18

Cop: whats your date of birth?

me: 12/07/1984 (fake DOB)

cop: (clearly knew i was lying) "Ok so what starsign are you then?"

me: ...... ... ..... oregano

cop: *laughs* "yeah ok, get out"

5 seconds later i realise.... ITS A FUC*ING HERB!

Friend got pulled over by a park ranger and I rolled down the back window and was like "You're not even a cop. You cant even give us a ticket."

lold so ****ing hard

moar moar moar

[godsamurai]

alot of lolz in these videos

this made my day

[godsamurai]

my wife guna kick ur ass LMFAOROFL

[davidkap]

gave them a witness statement when drunk and said my friend innitated a bar fight.


dun goofed./

[laes778]

Cop: "So where you live at?"
Me: "Why you wanna know?"
Cop: "You're making this more difficult son"
Me: "At my house"





wait wut?

[wjb316]

Two cops giving me the stinkeye outside a club.

I point at them, make eye contact and then spit on the ground with a smirk. Yes I was being a douche but so were they. Made it home OK though.

(I also jaywalked once but no cops were around)

[Le Derek]

cop told me to drive safe after giving me a ticket

i said "you too"

/facepalm

[godsamurai]

god im guna die laughing so hard

[ppself]

Shoot I got a list.

Cop- your window tint is illegal in va.
Me- I know sir, but I am moving to Texas right now.

And the classic one, which I said alot when I first started driving.

Cop- did you know your insurance, stickers, and tags is expired?
Me - what? I thought they were still good.

[futureMOUNTIE]

I was hammered drunk walking out of a bar...

me: "whats up buddy?" then i slap his ass with an open hand

Cop: "Touch or talk to me again and you will no what it feels like to get tazed" as he puts me in that arm bar thing behind my back and throws me against the wall

it is safe to say i didnt touch or say another word and just walked away in drunken embarassment

I wtf'd...then i Lol'd

[futureMOUNTIE]

Cop pulls me over, I was 14.


Cop: You look to young to be driving, you don't even look like you shave

Me: I started when I was 16.

Cop: Have a good night

Not funny. Doesn't even make sense

[lyrics312]

back in 07 when i was pulled over and caught with a bowl of weed, I asked the cop if I could have my pipe back after the trial was over because I'd spent alot of money on it.

[oneandonlydwt]

the truth.

brb acting like a statue whenever seeing a cop ever again.

[Yaaaaaabuddy]

Cop: "Have you been drinking? I can smell it on your breath."
Me: "No."

[dryst]

me and a buncha friends were driving back from the gas station for a beer run (i was only 18 at the time) we got pulled over for rolling through a red light that we sat at for 10 minutes without a green light. our DD was sober but what he didnt mention was that he was driving on a suspended lisence.

anyways the cop asked if anyone could drive and i was the only unaged person in the group, after asking for my ID he asked me f ill drive..i said no im drunk...breathilizer ensued

Cop: you know its illegal in all 50 states to drink under the age of 21 right
me: yup
Cop: (hand me my ID and walks back to car and gets on the radio)

as soon as he sits down we just jump over the road guard into the woods leaving the DD there with his car

the cop jumps out of his car as soon as he relizes whats happening

Cop: COME BACK HERE ***GOTS!
buddy: (stops running turns around and whips his junk out and starts stroking it...) tell your wife i said hi (then turns around and starts running again)
Cop: i got all night u mfer!!!

[SemperParatus]

So it was this good looking female cop. And yes, I was drunk.
Me: "Hey there cutie"
Her: "Please dont run or im gonna handcuff u"
ME:"No need baby, ill come voluntarily"
five minutes later we're ****n in my appartment.
feelsgood

riiiiight...

[SemperParatus]

We had a port call in Colombia. me and a couple buddies were SMASHED and started fuking with the Colombian MP's at the naval base gates. I don't really remember what we were saying but I remember at one point my buddy was grabbing the barrel of the MP's rifle and putting it to his own forehead and asking me to take a picture for the lulz. O_O

[Twist3dJok3r]

Cop: You know how fast you were going?

Me: 65?

Cop: 63

Me: Ah officer, isnt the speed limit 65?

Cop: Ya...it is

[SemperParatus]

Cop: You know how fast you were going?

Me: 65?

Cop: 63

Me: Ah officer, isnt the speed limit 65?

Cop: Ya...it is

[RunJoelRun]

"How do I Join?"

Because now I get to deal with everything you fukkers have said in this thread.

Funny thing is I always laugh and encourage it.

[ralphlauren55]

To all you bros who smoke the leaf and roll in you whip, remember smell is not "probably cause" he cannot search you car unless he has cause. Smell is not enough he must see bag or leaf-smoking tools or grinder or some thing.

My english is new but I am no fool (i am euro style)

smell is probable cause in my state (GA)