guys who wont sleep with a girl who has a BF.....

[DocHol1day]

are real pieces of sh!t.....

ok, that was a little extreme. let me explain.....


life is all about perspective and i think yours is messed up. when i choose to get serious with a woman, i do so because ultimately shes someone i could potentially turn into a life long partner. however, i dont turn a blind eye to her actions. shes still contantly being evaluated. dont take that the wrong way, i dont just sit around analyzing every little thing she does and says. i am however, still evaluating her character, how she responds to day to day stresses, how she treats her friends and the dating advice she gives/gets from them, etc. all these things help to paint a picture in my mind about who she'll be down the road. that being said, i value a woman who is faithful to me above all else. riddle me this guys. how am i supposed to know if shes faithful in a world where no guys will fuk her??? the man who can get my girl to cheat can have her. i'd do nothing more than shake his hand and thank him for not allowing me to waste any more of my time on a woman i deem undeserving. i encourage my girl to maintain her social life. i am totally accepting of her being in situations where something might or could happen, because thats how i evaluate her. guys who hate a guy who sleeps with a girl in a relationship fail to see it for what it is. they hate on the guy, because deep down they are afraid they couldnt leave the woman and its their way of transfering guilt when in reality that guy doesnt owe you, or your relationship a god damn thing. only in 20th century western culture are women not allowed to have more than one suitor at a time during the courtship process. like i said, life is all about perspective.......


/wall of text.

[notorius1]

they hate on the guy, because deep down they are afraid they couldnt leave the woman and its their way of transfering guilt when in reality that guy doesnt owe you, or your relationship a god damn thing. .

A lack of respect for someone elses relationship ois reason enough to be mad at anyone. I can 100% acknowledge that the next man owes me nothing but he has to acknowledge that I can end his life because I dont owe him a thing, either.

[UCFBuilder]

interesting way of looking at it..never saw it that way to be honest..got me thinking now to say the least..good post

[DocHol1day]

A lack of respect for someone elses relationship ois reason enough to be mad at anyone. I can 100% acknowledge that the next man owes me nothing but he has to acknowledge that I can end his life because I dont owe him a thing, either.

why does your relationship deserve respect? its nothing more than an evaluation period before marriage. she behaves in a matter you dont like, you walk. simple as that.

ending his life is against the law. ****ing your GF isnt. your arguement is invalid.

[mjs21]

I agree..if she's gonna cheat she's gonna cheat. You're not going to be able to stop it. Your philosophy is hard to put in place but would relieve a lot of stress and probably help your relationship overall. You shouldn't have to be insecure/jealous, it's no way to live.

[DocHol1day]

I agree..if she's gonna cheat she's gonna cheat. You're not going to be able to stop it. Your philosophy is hard to put in place but would relieve a lot of stress and probably help your relationship overall. You shouldn't have to be insecure/jealous, it's no way to live.

maybe its just because i'm older than a lot of you guys. been married, been divorced, ran through quite a few women, etc. i just see it for what it is and not for what i want it to be. i value loyalty above all else, if shes not loyal i walk. its the single biggest criteria i use to judge a woman, and i dont understand why some guys want to live in a world where that would be denied to them. to me, its just insecurity. insecurity about their ability to replace that woman, insecurity about their strength to walk if she cheats, etc. it just seems so obvious to me. but all day long we see posts about guys going after another guys GF and a million miscers calling him a piece of ****. news flash, they arent married. the whole concept of exclusive sexual relationships before marriage is entirely the invention of post feminist western culture. before that, men COURTED women, and women were courted by MANY men. no one got mad and threw hissy fits, because thats how it was. why would you want a woman who would sleep with another man given the chance truly baffles me.

[mjs21]

No, you are completely right. It's funny actually I like this girl who has a boyfriend and I'm still going to go after her. When I consulted my friend he said, "look that guy is just a place holder. She is always looking for something better. She doesn't know what she wants but you can show her that she can be with better." And it's funny because the whole time i've been talking to her she's never once mentioned she has a boyfriend (Only reason i know is through ********). She's actually invited me to do things, gave me her number without me asking etc. (I denied at the time because I had a girlfriend) Basically, I look at it this way if I want something I'm just going to go for it. If she rejects me then she's a loyal girl and that's great but you just move on to the next one.

EDIT: I probably wouldn't do anything sexual with a girl until she actually broke it off with her boyfriend though. If my girlfriend was interested in another guy I would at least hope she had the decency to break it off with me before cheating.

[Ascendent]

I salute them.

[DocHol1day]

I salute them.

i know. you among others actually caused me to think about this entirely too much and then make this thread.

why do you think thats better? i really, honestly, dont understand why you would want to continue to be with a woman who would cheat. it just baffles me that people would want to remove from the equation the single best way to judge a womans character. make it make sense for me.

[deg5589]

I do agree that it can be very helpful to have an occurence in which some random joe enables a gf to cheat, because it reveals her true character early in the relationship. I disagree on taking a prejudiced stance towards all men who refuse to become involved with another man's gf.

Reasons for those who refuse to bang another man's gf or wife are varied, and here are just a few
- The few who value honor, their sense of honor, pride, and self diginity do not allow themselves to stoop to what they perceive as a scumbag's behavior
-Fear of provocation
-Views such behavior as disgusting, morally and/or physically
-Perhaps he has more important things to be doing than putting it into every woman in sight (work, school, familial responsibilities, or whatever else he/she deems important.
-Fear of std's, or maybe has one
-Performance anxiety
-the list goes on

Personally, I am simply too preoccupied with my degree, and getting ahead in life to even bother with someone else's gf, I have zero patience and no tolerance whatsoever with the typical drama tha ensues from such an action. And secondly, I value my self-diginity to the point that I would never contemplate such an action to begin with. I will not enable some gal to cheat, for moral reasons, there are plenty enough out there who are more than willing to enable her. And if my gal cheats, she is totally kicked out of my life, and if she is going to, the sooner the better and good ridance as far as I'm concerned.

[notorius1]

why does your relationship deserve respect? its nothing more than an evaluation period before marriage. she behaves in a matter you dont like, you walk. simple as that.

Keep in mind I'm not saying stay with the broad after she cheats. Leave her and still fuk him up on general principle. Say what you will but if you mess with a chick that has a boyfriend, there are possible consequences.

ending his life is against the law. ****ing your GF isnt. your arguement is invalid.

Only if you get caught.

[notorius1]

If my girlfriend was interested in another guy I would at least hope she had the decency to break it off with me before cheating.

No female would ever do this. They have to be secure and will monkeybranch on your ass

[mjs21]

Keep in mind I'm not saying stay with the broad after she cheats. Leave her and still fuk him up on general principle. Say what you will but if you mess with a chick that has a boyfriend, there are possible consequences.

It's not the guys fault. All blame should be placed on the girlfriend (or cheater). It was their decision to cheat on you. They were not forced to do it. They chose to cheat on you and therefore do not love or respect you. So it's goodbye to them. Directing the anger toward the guy would be a mistake it should be directed toward the girl.

[DocHol1day]

I do agree that it can be very helpful to have an occurence in which some random joe enables a gf to cheat, because it reveals her true character early in the relationship. I disagree on taking a prejudiced stance towards all men who refuse to become involved with another man's gf.

the prejudiced stance was an attempt at humor, a failed one i suppose.

Reasons for those who refuse to bang another man's gf or wife are varied, and here are just a few
- The few who value honor, their sense of honor, pride, and self diginity do not allow themselves to stoop to what they perceive as a scumbag's behavior
-Fear of provocation
-Views such behavior as disgusting, morally and/or physically
-Perhaps he has more important things to be doing than putting it into every woman in sight (work, school, familial responsibilities, or whatever else he/she deems important.
-Fear of std's, or maybe has one
-Performance anxiety
-the list goes on

Personally, I am simply too preoccupied with my degree, and getting ahead in life to even bother with someone else's gf, I have zero patience and no tolerance whatsoever with the typical drama tha ensues from such an action. And secondly, I value my self-diginity to the point that I would never contemplate such an action to begin with. I will not enable some gal to cheat, for moral reasons, there are plenty enough out there who are more than willing to enable her. And if my gal cheats, she is totally kicked out of life, and if she is going to, the sooner the better and good ridance as far as I'm concerned.

see, this is perfect. well mostly. i think that in our society, we take our relationships too seriously, and our marriages not seriously enough. THATS where old timers had it right. THATS where we are screwing up. i dont really think guys who leave girls in rships alone are pieces of ****, i just detest the attitude i see on these forums where they call a guy who does fuk her a piece of ****. he's doing you a favor, open your eyes and thank the man for helping you get a cheating leach out of your life!

Keep in mind I'm not saying stay with the broad after she cheats. Leave her and still fuk him up on general principle. Say what you will but if you mess with a chick that has a boyfriend, there are possible consequences.

what principle? not respecting you? you still havent answered why a casual relationship deserves any respect. we arent talking about marriage here. like i said above, western culture takes its relationships too seriously, and its marriages not seriously enough. you guys act like your married before you even are. you do realize the man did you a favor right? why in the world would you fight a man who helped you so much?

[mjs21]

No female would ever do this. They have to be secure and will monkeybranch on your ass

Believe it or not I have two friends whose current girlfriends left their boyfriends for them. But in both cases the girls broke it off with their previous boyfriends before going further. All I was saying was I wouldn't want it done to me so I'd say to a girl just break it off with your boyfriend before we go any further. Saves some headache (hopefully)

[notorius1]

It's not the guys fault. All blame should be placed on the girlfriend (or cheater). It was their decision to cheat on you. They were not forced to do it. They chose to cheat on you and therefore do not love or respect you. So it's goodbye to them. Directing the anger toward the guy would be a mistake it should be directed toward the girl.

Its one thing to just get some tail from a chick who lies and says she doesnt have a boyfriend/husband.

Its another thing to bone someone who has told you that she is involved

but if he knows and makes posts about you on social networking site about boning your chick then IMO he gets blame.



Thats way more than just getting ass

[deg5589]

the prejudiced stance was an attempt at humor, a failed one i suppose.

Ah I see, humor is not one of strong points.

[mistaballoonhan]

riddle me this guys. how am i supposed to know if shes faithful in a world where no guys will fuk her??? the man who can get my girl to cheat can have her. i'd do nothing more than shake his hand and thank him for not allowing me to waste any more of my time on a woman i deem undeserving. i encourage my girl to maintain her social life. i am totally accepting of her being in situations where something might or could happen, because thats how i evaluate her. guys who hate a guy who sleeps with a girl in a relationship fail to see it for what it is. they hate on the guy, because deep down they are afraid they couldnt leave the woman and its their way of transfering guilt when in reality that guy doesnt owe you, or your relationship a god damn thing. only in 20th century western culture are women not allowed to have more than one suitor at a time during the courtship process. like i said, life is all about perspective.......


/wall of text.

Why does she need to be faithful in a world where no guys will fuk her?

The only problem with your strategy is that you aren't always gonna find out if she cheated or not.

[mjs21]

Its one thing to just get some tail from a chick who lies and says she doesnt have a boyfriend/husband.

Its another thing to bone someone who has told you that she is involved

but if he knows and makes posts about you on social networking site about boning your chick then IMO he gets blame.



Thats way more than just getting ass

Okay yeah In that case if he is rubbing it in and making you look like a fool then yes I can understand wanting to beat his ass. I still feel even if the guy knows she has a bf/husband it doesn't matter she still went through with it. It was her choice. 100% blame is on her.

[notorius1]

what principle? not respecting you? you still havent answered why a casual relationship deserves any respect. we arent talking about marriage here. like i said above, western culture takes its relationships too seriously, and its marriages not seriously enough. you guys act like your married before you even are. you do realize the man did you a favor right? why in the world would you fight a man who helped you so much?

I guess im in the married mindstate still. I forget most 24 yr olds arent married nor are they about to be divorced. I havent been "casual" for some years now so my view point is bit skewed.



A regular relationship only deserves respect IMO because you never know what that couple is building towards.

[mjs21]

Why does she need to be faithful in a world where no guys will fuk her?

The only problem with your strategy is that you aren't always gonna find out if she cheated or not.

I agree but this stuff always has a way of showing it ugly head eventually.

[janky]

I agree..if she's gonna cheat she's gonna cheat. You're not going to be able to stop it. Your philosophy is hard to put in place but would relieve a lot of stress and probably help your relationship overall. You shouldn't have to be insecure/jealous, it's no way to live.

^ pretty much this.

Great post doc.

Spending your whole life being paranoid of someone cheating and trying to "catch them up" seems like such a shtty way to live.

I tell girls right off the bat, if you wanna fck someone I'm down for a 3way, and it should be mutual w me.
They always give that "Ohhh noo i just want you!" and im like "Yea ok, but if you change your mind, be honest because if you lie I'm done with you forever".

I give people the freedom to do whatever the fck they want (yes, even sleep w people) and evaluate their actions based on that. I don't set restrictions and try to police people. There's no point, in fact, you're probably pissing them off into doing something.

Only when you give someone the total freedom do they show their true colors. So if a girl wants to fck someone else and can be honest, I respect that and we can take our relationship down a notch and just have fun as fck buddies, keeping in mind that sharing goes both ways and that means I get 3ways too hahaa

[notorius1]

100% blame is on her.

I agree completely. She was supposed to be commited to me and broke it for whatever reason. The numbers are in my favor and she can be replaced because I am a man and this is my world.

[DocHol1day]

Why does she need to be faithful in a world where no guys will fuk her?

The only problem with your strategy is that you aren't always gonna find out if she cheated or not.

because whats in her heart is far more important that what actually happens, wouldnt you agree?

who would you rather spend your life with?

-a girl who always flirts behind your back and attempts to fuk guys, but cant because no guys will have her

or

-a girl who is loyal and faithful, even when your not around. guys try to fuk her, but she rejects them.


its not what happens that really matters, its what her intentions were. her intentions define her character.

you cant control if you find out or not, but if your perceptive to these things, you can probably find out unless shes a sociopath.

Okay yeah In that case if he is rubbing it in and making you look like a fool then yes I can understand wanting to beat his ass. I still feel even if the guy knows she has a bf/husband it doesn't matter she still went through with it. It was her choice. 100% blame is on her.

of course. if a man then uses that to insult you then i'd smash his face too. not for the sex, but for insulting me over it.v totally different imo.

I guess im in the married mindstate still. I forget most 24 yr olds arent married nor are they about to be divorced. I havent been "casual" for some years now so my view point is bit skewed.



A regular relationship only deserves respect IMO because you never know what that couple is building towards.

but arent you doing him a favor by showing him that he is building toward something with a low quality woman?

[UMADSON]

I hate competition, I value myself above having to compete against various men for the said women.

I have mentioned this whole boyfriend/girlfriend bond being fabricated before, and in my opinion if your women cheats on you, she shoulders the majority of the blame not the male who enticed her.

A man's wife is a whole other story

[Ascendent]

Just posting to hold a spot. I'm in the middle of a paper, I'll get back to this thread.

[darkshines]

are real pieces of sh!t.....

ok, that was a little extreme. let me explain.....


life is all about perspective and i think yours is messed up. when i choose to get serious with a woman, i do so because ultimately shes someone i could potentially turn into a life long partner. however, i dont turn a blind eye to her actions. shes still contantly being evaluated. dont take that the wrong way, i dont just sit around analyzing every little thing she does and says. i am however, still evaluating her character, how she responds to day to day stresses, how she treats her friends and the dating advice she gives/gets from them, etc. all these things help to paint a picture in my mind about who she'll be down the road. that being said, i value a woman who is faithful to me above all else. riddle me this guys. how am i supposed to know if shes faithful in a world where no guys will fuk her??? the man who can get my girl to cheat can have her. i'd do nothing more than shake his hand and thank him for not allowing me to waste any more of my time on a woman i deem undeserving. i encourage my girl to maintain her social life. i am totally accepting of her being in situations where something might or could happen, because thats how i evaluate her. guys who hate a guy who sleeps with a girl in a relationship fail to see it for what it is. they hate on the guy, because deep down they are afraid they couldnt leave the woman and its their way of transfering guilt when in reality that guy doesnt owe you, or your relationship a god damn thing. only in 20th century western culture are women not allowed to have more than one suitor at a time during the courtship process. like i said, life is all about perspective.......


/wall of text.

You agree that cheating on your boyfriend or girlfriend is a poor character trait, right? You consider a woman who would cheat on you as "undeserving"; I agree, I would never give a cheating ex the time of day.

Let's hypothesize that you're dating an undeserving girl like this, unbeknownst to you as of yet, and she comes onto me at the bar. I would probably spend an hour flirting, building rapport, tracking down a yellow cab, etc. You would want me to waste my own time entertaining some retarded bitch with a glaring character flaw (and who knows what others) in order to help you, a complete stranger, discover his girlfriend is scum? No thanks. There's plenty of single women at the bar, isn't there? Sadly, some of them might actually be much worse people than the hypothetical girlfriend in question, but that's neither here nor there.

For me, it's not an issue of responsibility or blame. Poking another dude's girl isn't necessarily a reflection of your character or morals as you should not be held responsible for their relationship. For me, it's an issue of whether or not I want to spend X hours with a girl like that. It's almost a question of what type of people I want to surround myself with. Now, odds are the majority of patrons at a bar or club have a handful of character flaws but deceit or untrustworthyness is one of the worst, imo. If it shows its ugly head I'm out, the sooner the better, which is exactly your point, just not the method by which I'd prefer to discover it. I'd rather hang out with a trustworthy womanizing booze hound that snorts too much blow than a celibate boy scout who I can't trust farther than I can throw.

Granted, this only applies if she makes it known she has a BF. If she keeps that to herself, then the whole question is moot, obviously.

[DocHol1day]

Judging by the comments in m CP, I've atleast given some of you something to think about.

I don't believe that my stance can be logically defeated, perhaps emotionally, but not logically. I hope to entertain a thought provoking debate though.

[darkshines]

Judging by the comments in m CP, I've atleast given some of you something to think about.

I don't believe that my stance can be logically defeated, perhaps emotionally, but not logically. I hope to entertain a thought provoking debate though.

you posted at the same time as me you son of a gun

[beaucephus]

*Doc walks into a room while I've got his girl bent over the head board*

"Don't worry, Doc! I'm saving you the trouble!"