None taken.. It's something a lot of people don't really get.. And people have called me crazy before.
I'll give my whole back story on bodybuilding; if you like you can scroll down to where I put stars to read the hrt bit.
At 13 I was a perfectly normal...fat.. gamer.. For several years most of my time spent was glued to a leather computer chair on a game I very much enjoyed called Everquest.. I was home schooled, and rather bright.. so I had already passed high school level material.. as such, my parents let me have most of my time to do what I wanted. With a little time reserved for whatever college level material I chose.. (mainly anatomy and physiology, other higher sciences.. which would come in handy later in bodybuilding)
Nothing really wrong with the 12-15 hour gaming days.. I'd drink like a 12 pack of cokes and eat sub sandwiches every day.. it was a recipe for being fat; I was like 240 pounds. It was a lot of fun and I knew it was my choice to be like that.. One day, ironically, I was "standing around" in the "plane of knowledge" in the game and saw a monk walk by.. Monks are martial artists in the game. I decided, rather matter-of-factly to start taking a martial art..
I went by a local Karate Dojo and spoke with the instructer.. He offered a free lesson later that night; I went for it. I started taking there and got very into Karate. After about 6 months I had lost some fat and a powerlifer's son started taking Karate, too. He was about 16, they convinced me to come to the gym. It was tough.. they were benching all this weight and I used just the bar, I think I finally did 55 pounds my first night. They brought me back for a few more workouts and I decided it was something I wanted to do, too. I got really into weight lifting and started going 5 times a week (age 14). Finally the gym owner.. a record holding powerlifter agreed to train me (for a fee). I started working out 5 times a week for hours at a time, him training me. I also came back in 3-5 nights a week for a circuit training class that he taught, it kicked my ass too. I was finally pretty fit and my abs showed through an UnderArmour shirt.. at age 14..
I kept working out but stopped paying for training.. I did Karate too. After about another year my mom saw an ad for a gym that was for sale.. Long story short we looked at it and finally got a loan and bought it.. We refurbished it, 10,000 sq feet.. It was badass.. A real hardcore gym. I kept working out and doing Karate, more focused on bodybuilding..
I kept this up until about 17.. I did several cycles from 15 or 16 to late 17.. I was finally really big.. I never did a PCT.. It was something people around our town never heard of.. I kept a lot of gains without it.. My diet was perfect and I finally had 19&1/2 inch arms.. Doing the whole stack and then some on most machines.. benching 265 for 6 or 8..
I decided I needed to cut down and compete..
I got a hold of some Cytomel just before a family vacation that had me walking all day.. I had done my research, as I always did and it seemed perfect to use it on such a vacation..
I started taking it on the way down to Florida.. I felt hot and lost a belt adjustment after my first day.. All at 12.5 mcgs! The next day I went up to 25mcgs.. I felt fine, I felt warm and like everything was going well.. I used 25mcgs for a day or two longer.. Then went up to 37.5mcg.. all fine.. Then the next day 25mcgs... Then that night at dinner it hit me.. I felt a weird "movement" in my neck (thyroid area) and I instantly felt hot and my heart was racing.. I was terrified, I felt strongly that I was going to die.. I left the table and went off to the bathroom to try and get a hold of myself.. I finally calmed down a little and we left the restaurant.. I could hardly get enough air walking back to the car.. It was difficult to walk my heart was racing so fast.. I made it back to the condo and still felt more or less like ****.. my girlfriend at the time listened to my chest and said the rhythm was irregular and it would skip beats.. I dropped the dose back to 12.5, knowing that cold turkey was not the way to get off of it.. I still felt the same way, horrible.. on and off.. several days later I dropped it to 6.25mcgs... then to zero.. For months the problem persisted. My heart rate was so high sitting down I felt like ****.. I attempted work out and I'd be almost passing out my first set... I tried several more times.. but eventually just gave up for the time being... I didn't want to eat, that made me feel like **** too.. my heart rate would get faster after.. My thyroid was sore, too..
So after a low calorie diet, no steroids, no working out and being what I could only assume as very hyperthyroid for about 6 months.. I lost it all.. When I was finally normal, or close to it.. My strength was gone.. the size was gone.. All that work- for nothing.. all for 6-7 days on Cytomel.
After the 6 months of getting back to close to normal there were about 3 to get mostly back to normal.. Anxiety persisted well into the 7th 8th and 9th month.. I didn't feel like getting back into bodybuilding that fast.. so I just played normal.. I ate what I wanted and didn't really work out.. I got chubby again.. Then, after we ran out of money in the gym fund.. several months went by in the red, eating our personal money.. working 60 hours a week and losing money on it.. We closed our doors and went bankrupt.. I didn't feel like paying a competitor, so I just didn't work out.. I kept eating and living normally.. got into college for a while.. gained a little more.. and after years.. I wanted to slowly get back into things..
I hatched a plan to get prescribed testosterone.. I knew that soy had moderate estrogenic effects.. I knew Estrogen shut down the HPTA.. So I drank a half gallon of Soy Milk a day and a ton of tofu.. Hoping to lower my test levels.. I went to a doctor (though unfortunately... quit the soy two days before) and asked for testosterone.. I told him I thought I was low.. He agreed to do a blood test but heard a "little heart murmur".. He said it probably was nothing but had be have a chest Xray.. ECG and 24hr EKG Halter.. After all that he said I had a "leaky Aortic valve" and no further treatment was needed.. no problem at all.. However; the testosterone test came back and I was normal... "you're free testosterone is actually a little high!" I asked him if I could have it anyways.. and he said he doesn't like to use it unless it's deficient.. I asked him if there was anyone else I could talk to and he referred me to an Endocrinologist..
The Endocrinologist was popular.. I had to wait like 6 months to get in.. It finally came around and I went, not very hopeful of what I'd hear from him..
I got there and saw him and he was really cool.. He was cussing and joking my first visit.. I told him, plain and simple, that I just wanted some.. I said I felt much better and was more positive and less anxious while on it. (I admitted to buying and using it illegally before..) He said it wasn't really the best option for that.. I answered "Well you're the second doctor to tell me no; I'll have to go to a third." He laughed and said let's just take a blood test and see.. I explained the previous blood test and he said let's just see how it goes..
My total testosterone came back at 302, below normal parameters.. I was in; He started me on 5g of Androgel a day.. I was so stoked.. Legal testosterone.. how ****ing perfect, I thought.. My goal was to get on lifetime HRT so that I wouldn't need harsh drugs for PCT; I'd just go right off and have optimal hormone levels.. I'd also have a legal supply for some of what I needed..
It's official.. I am now hypogonadic and get test paid for by insurance for life.. Loving every minute of it.. I've gone back for several blood tests and he's increased me to this point.
I hope to get a little higher dose of test, along with some other good stuff...
halotestin and DHT ^ ^
Post number 18.
Fat Armenian Gamer takes up roids in favor of WOW and turns jacked. Unfortunately ****s his whole pituitary gonadal axis and now needs supp. roids fer gud.
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