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  1. #1
    Banned TeamLean's Avatar
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    Girl says she loves me, however doesn't want a relationship. What do?

    Cliffs: 6 months ago was a huge WK and BFFL, although for some reason she fell in love with me but didn't want a relationship.
    Ignored her for a good 2 months before seeing her at a party and we made out multiple times. (I was the second guy to kiss this girl, solid 8/10)
    Next day she thanks me for a good night but still doesn't want a relationship.
    Basically ignored her from July till now and we saw each other randomly throughout the months.
    I get informed by all her friends that she's putting on a brave face around me and she's hurting because I simply don't care enough to keep interest with her. Basically she's now chasing me for my attention.
    I speak to her today and she opens up to me about how i'm the most amazing guy she knows and how she doesn't know if it's still love but she always feels happy around me and enjoys my company.
    I tell her we could 'see' eachother which means we can meet up with whoever we like whilst dating, but she doesn't want that or a relationship.
    She continues to tell me all her emotions and I tell her 'I know, this hasn't changed anything between us' and she goes into dissapoint mode because she's still wanting me to stick around.

    I know I could easily kiss her whenever I want, although she's still a virgin so I don't think I could escalate into a true FWB. I'm still the 2nd guy out of 4 to kiss her and the closest guy she's loved, I'm just interested whether theres' a way to smash this barrier down, as I think she's still hurt from her last boyfriend who used and dumped her to go out with her best friend. If there's no real solution, it's cool because I'm enjoying the social side of things with the women I meet up at college and town. I would however consider the possibility of a relationship with said girl if she would just give in to her desires and quit chasing me and then retreating while her friends bitch at me for not talking to her enough.

    Thanks RH.
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  2. #2
    I REP BACK!! jessen.brett's Avatar
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    i think what she needs is a friend, just be there for her, tell her you are, show her you care, she obviously still has feelings for the other guy so its not worth going for yet anyways, you need to get her mind off him and onto you, dont bring him up, if she talks about him dont talk **** but say she doesnt deserve to get treated that way...
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  3. #3
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    Originally Posted by jessen.brett View Post
    i think what she needs is a friend, just be there for her, tell her you are, show her you care, she obviously still has feelings for the other guy so its not worth going for yet anyways, you need to get her mind off him and onto you, dont bring him up, if she talks about him dont talk **** but say she doesnt deserve to get treated that way...
    No, she completely hates him and ridicules him at every oppurtunity they make contact. I'm listening to what she says and I meet up/communicate with her, but because i'm not the uber nice/funny guy anymore who will hold her bag or buy her a drink, her friends bitch to me telling me that i'm immature for ever walking away from what was never going to be a successful relationship when I was chasing her. Now the roles reversed but she still has her shield up. The worst part is that they compare me to this guy whose in love with her and tells her so 24/7 and continues to be friends with her and betas her after she rejected him, following like a lost puppy. Now guess who can get the action whenever they want and guess who sits back being frustrated that they get nothing in return? I'm the first, he's the second and the fact is nice guys do FINISH LAST. She talks to him 24/7, she tells him she loves him back and yet he gets nothing. He needs a man mentality, not being manipulated by this girl.

    So annoying when girls think the only right way is to stay bestfriends and appreciate her love for me when there's no relationship progression. Yes I appreciate it and i'm willing to talk to her, just don't expect me to waste all my time on one girl when I have a life revolving around college, friends and meeting other women.

    p.s she doesn't even mention him, I just have a feeling that she's still under the impression that our relationship could be ruined and she'll be in constant fear.
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  4. #4
    I REP BACK!! jessen.brett's Avatar
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    man thats a tough situation, just be friends with her for now and see what happens, talk to other girls, but dont go around hooking up with girls, she'll come back if she feels threatened, but the question you have to ask is "is it worth it?"...youre 17, there is more fish in the sea...i used to hold on to my ex's too...but sometimes u just gotta give up and move on...the choice is yours
    "There are plenty of difficult obstacles in your path. Don't allow yourself to become one of them."-Ralph Marston
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  5. #5
    Live to learn. phatryde's Avatar
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    I never seen a girl who didn't enjoy male attention. Quit being suckered into her BS. Ignoring her works but then all of a sudden you bring up relationships?

    Grab her damn hand, and place it over your cawk next time you guys are alone. Make her feel that cawk (srs).

    Edit: Make her feel that cawk.

    Edit #2: Make her feel that cawk.

    Edit #3: Make her feel that cawk.
    Cawk=Pussy. The only equation for a successful relationship.

    Be honest. Lying takes too much effort to keep track of.
    Make her feel da c**k.
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  6. #6
    I gives it straight Sinergy2010's Avatar
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    Your red (sigh)

    If she "doesnt want a relationship" that means I dont want a relationship with YOU.

    Trust me, Been there done that in the past. Your cool, your fun, you a great distraction for NOW but she will move on and find somone else bro.

    Move on. Grab some balls and go forth
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  7. #7
    Registered User caretaker1's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Sinergy2010 View Post
    Your red (sigh)

    If she "doesnt want a relationship" that means I dont want a relationship with YOU.
    Correct. She likes the attention from you. Her esteem is built up because she has a guy who she knows likes her. She's not sexually attracted to you. She wants to go back to using you as an emotional tampon. She has friend-zoned you. So the only question to ask yourself is, "Can I be happy just being her friend?". If you like her romantically, that makes a friendship very hard on you. Your best bet is to let her know you're not interested in just being friends, cut off contact, and start seeing other women.
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  8. #8
    Stalking Takes Dedication FunSize1990's Avatar
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    Let me get this straight, she loves you more then anyone. But doesn't want a relationship or fwb relationship.

    And you think you are winning, and you aren't as bad as the othet Beta?

    You cannot honestly be that stupid. Can you?
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  9. #9
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    Originally Posted by TeamLean View Post
    Cliffs: 6 months ago was a huge WK and BFFL, although for some reason she fell in love with me but didn't want a relationship.
    Ignored her for a good 2 months before seeing her at a party and we made out multiple times. (I was the second guy to kiss this girl, solid 8/10)
    Next day she thanks me for a good night but still doesn't want a relationship.
    Basically ignored her from July till now and we saw each other randomly throughout the months.
    I get informed by all her friends that she's putting on a brave face around me and she's hurting because I simply don't care enough to keep interest with her. Basically she's now chasing me for my attention.
    I speak to her today and she opens up to me about how i'm the most amazing guy she knows and how she doesn't know if it's still love but she always feels happy around me and enjoys my company.
    I tell her we could 'see' eachother which means we can meet up with whoever we like whilst dating, but she doesn't want that or a relationship.
    She continues to tell me all her emotions and I tell her 'I know, this hasn't changed anything between us' and she goes into dissapoint mode because she's still wanting me to stick around.

    I know I could easily kiss her whenever I want, although she's still a virgin so I don't think I could escalate into a true FWB. I'm still the 2nd guy out of 4 to kiss her and the closest guy she's loved, I'm just interested whether theres' a way to smash this barrier down, as I think she's still hurt from her last boyfriend who used and dumped her to go out with her best friend. If there's no real solution, it's cool because I'm enjoying the social side of things with the women I meet up at college and town. I would however consider the possibility of a relationship with said girl if she would just give in to her desires and quit chasing me and then retreating while her friends bitch at me for not talking to her enough.

    Thanks RH.
    Just fuk her and get it over with phaggot.
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  10. #10
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    son, I am dissapoint. You letting this girl manipulate you and fill your head up with this nonsense, while in a few weeks she'll be jumping the next guy's bones. Tell her to step up or step off. A female telling you she isn't ready for a relationship is simply telling you that she's not ready for a relationship with YOU, and if someone she really likes doesn't come along, she might settle for you.
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