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  1. #91
    finally back at it DaBurg3r's Avatar
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    Just please GTFO the relationship now before anything else happens. I think she's gonna like the attention a bunch and wanna start dating or something.

    Not advocating jealousy or whatever but I've never gone about purposefully ditching a girlfriend then come home and been all "Babes, I was lookin' good last night!"
    Tie your shoes = ready for anything

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  2. #92
    Registered User simpleghost's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Towley View Post
    Update for the misc

    woke up today and the wife was in bed with me....(I worked today)...her sister and some dude were on my couch

    ignored her all day...she called me and asked why the apt was so trashed...I explained she got wasted and sister/dude slept over


    she worked and got home tonight, didnt mention how ***d up this is or anything, minded my own business

    wife blurts out "I looked so hot last night"

    RAGED...WTF is this?? she acted like the typical female...blah blah blah

    she is spending the night like she did last night, with some other dudes cock down her throat .....Im glad shes not here
    fixed
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  3. #93
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    In on moar updates.
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  4. #94
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    dude just raid her phone while she's sleeping or facebook

    edit: read the update. wtf? are we in kindergarten again?
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  5. #95
    i ain't even mad NOLA27's Avatar
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    probably wants more attention , you been lackin in the attention department brah??
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  6. #96
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    Originally Posted by NOLA27 View Post
    probably wants more attention , you been lackin in the attention department brah??
    White Knight to the rescue. its always the dudes fault when woman does something wrong right?

    OP this thread is painful, even if your wife isnt cheating, she has absolutely no respect for you whatsoever. Bail now before things get even worse.
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  7. #97
    Registered User Ironbru's Avatar
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    Reading this thread is making me more and more angry so I can only imagine how you're feeling. Just tell her to **** off out of your house (if it is your house), then change the locks, otherwise make her sleep in the spare room and I would suggest to start bullying and making life difficult for her (for instance call her a bitch and a slut and tell her she can't have anyone over), so she goes ape and either leaves of her own accord (deserting the marital home) or does something stupid, which will hopefully secure you more evidence (which you will probably need) to get a quick divorce and a good settlement (and she won't get much of anything). Make sure you get professional legal advice over this as well - and do this soon.

    I'd like to hear what events led up to this as well - there must be something that you haven't told us. You said that you never 100% trusted her (why was this?), yet you married her.
    Last edited by Ironbru; 10-31-2010 at 06:44 AM.
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  8. #98
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    another update for misc....sorry I did not reply sooner

    cliffs on Towleys marriage

    -met in college...always "best friends"...AKA friend zone (she honestly was best friend though)
    -graduated (she was 1 year behind me)
    -moved, got a good job, stopped being WK Phaggot, had a few girlfriends, nice car, better style, you get it
    -didnt see her for 2-3 years, talked once in a while, would talk about new job/girlfriends/etc
    -she moves to other side of country with some dude
    -didnt work out, she flew across the county to see me
    -no longer WK...hit it the 2nd night...she initated it (shot her down at first)
    -Towley gets dem feelings, so does she, flys across country multiple times
    -had alcohol problem for a whiel now, it gets out of control at this point for whatever reason
    -eloped!
    -wife moves back home...after a few months I move too
    -move here and everything goes south


    Im pretty sure thats why Im having issues now...Im in her world...no crew of guys, not framiliar with area, dont do much besides work, etc

    things have been downhill since I moved here....shes talking to ex's, has no interest in sex, constant arguing
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  9. #99
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    thanks for support and advice misc!
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  10. #100
    Registered User momo5's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Towley View Post
    moved from long island to the end of the earth after getting married

    no friends here (besides co-workers, but dont hang out with them)

    left my crew of guys in LI, all I do is work

    wife goes out with sister, skanky friends, dressed like slut

    WTF is this?? not worried Ill get cheated on but this is bull****

    **RESPECT SRS TAG**

    anyone else in my shoes? im too old for this ****
    whats the point of marriage? sounds like sht bro there no reason to get married very dumb only benefit the woman . When you go out bro she gonna file divorce and take half your sht.
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  11. #101
    Banned Towley's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by momo5 View Post
    whats the point of marriage? sounds like sht bro there no reason to get married very dumb only benefit the woman . When you go out bro she gonna file divorce and take half your sht.
    you are 100% right...I was very idealistic about it


    it does not work out...but if you must get married make sure you at least live with the chick first

    and dont EVER marry a girl because she is hot
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  12. #102
    Registered User Daewoo_Lanos's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Towley View Post
    another update for misc....sorry I did not reply sooner

    cliffs on Towleys marriage

    -met in college...always "best friends"...AKA friend zone (she honestly was best friend though)
    -graduated (she was 1 year behind me)
    -moved, got a good job, stopped being WK Phaggot, had a few girlfriends, nice car, better style, you get it
    -didnt see her for 2-3 years, talked once in a while, would talk about new job/girlfriends/etc
    -she moves to other side of country with some dude
    -didnt work out, she flew across the county to see me
    -no longer WK...hit it the 2nd night...she initated it (shot her down at first)
    -Towley gets dem feelings, so does she, flys across country multiple times
    -had alcohol problem for a whiel now, it gets out of control at this point for whatever reason
    -eloped!
    -wife moves back home...after a few months I move too
    -move here and everything goes south


    Im pretty sure thats why Im having issues now...Im in her world...no crew of guys, not framiliar with area, dont do much besides work, etc

    things have been downhill since I moved here....shes talking to ex's, has no interest in sex, constant arguing

    i'd start meeting with every divorce lawyer in town so she can't hire any of them, but that's just me.
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  13. #103
    Registered User majszownik's Avatar
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    i love how everybody tells op to divorce his wife instead of talk to her and try to solve the problem. this is fukking marriage, not a high school relationship.
    she stuck by you when you had an alcohol problem and you're raging because of said situation? let's say that i can understand why you're angry but come on.

    and i loved the comment that you should call her a slut and a bitch so that she'll break up with him. way to go.

    again: it's MARRIAGE. jesus fukking christ.
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  14. #104
    Registered User Daewoo_Lanos's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by majszownik View Post
    i love how everybody tells op to divorce his wife instead of talk to her and try to solve the problem. this is fukking marriage, not a high school relationship.
    she stuck by you when you had an alcohol problem and you're raging because of said situation? let's say that i can understand why you're angry but come on.

    and i loved the comment that you should call her a slut and a bitch so that she'll break up with him. way to go.

    again: it's MARRIAGE. jesus fukking christ.

    i would stick by my wife if she turned alcoholic.

    i would dump her ass in the middle of our golden anniversary party if i found out that in year 1 of our marriage she took it a little too far with her ex who was 'just a friend.'

    it's called RESPECT. jesus fukking christ.
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  15. #105
    Registered User majszownik's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Daewoo_Lanos View Post
    i would stick by my wife if she turned alcoholic.

    i would dump her ass in the middle of our golden anniversary party if i found out that in year 1 of our marriage she took it a little too far with her ex who was 'just a friend.'

    it's called RESPECT. jesus fukking christ.
    where does it say exactly that she took something a little too far? from what i've read it's all about op's suspicions and that he was raging cause she went out without him, dressed like "a slut".
    and you think that a person who is an alcoholic shows their spouse RESPECT? such bull*hit.
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  16. #106
    trains with chains. Ascendent's Avatar
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    Read all four pages, something is definately up.

    Deal with it how you see fit, but know that you're probably not the only man in her life right now.

    Edit: Missed the thing about her sister and sleeping over at her mother's house.

    Think about it, if her sister was with some guy do you really think that she just stood by all night while her sister got all the attention? Don't be stupid. She was with some guy too. Her sister came home with hers, she left hers at the bar or his house or wherever.

    Secondly, parents house. Perfect cover, because her sister will be there with her (most likely with her guy) and your wife can meet up with somebody there while you're being cuckolded into believing it's just them. That is, if she's actually staying at her parents' place. Who knows where she's really going.
    Last edited by Ascendent; 10-31-2010 at 06:13 PM.
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  17. #107
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    Originally Posted by majszownik View Post
    where does it say exactly that she took something a little too far? from what i've read it's all about op's suspicions and that he was raging cause she went out without him, dressed like "a slut".
    and you think that a person who is an alcoholic shows their spouse RESPECT? such bull*hit.
    alcoholism is a disease. being a disrespectful attention whore isn't, despite being a world-wide epidemic.

    OP seems like a very passive guy, i.e. actually believes she's at her parents house for the night... basically, the opposite of a paranoid ass expecting the worst every time she goes out for some milk. if someone like that is getting suspicious, it's probably for a good reason.

    OP can bump this thread when his suspicions are confirmed.

    his wife is a disrespectful bitch. OP is younger than some virgins i've known. he can wipe the slate clean and start over with someone who deserves him instead of waiting for her some bitch he settled for to take half his sh*t.
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  18. #108
    Registered User Jacked_J's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by majszownik View Post
    i love how everybody tells op to divorce his wife instead of talk to her and try to solve the problem. this is fukking marriage, not a high school relationship.
    she stuck by you when you had an alcohol problem and you're raging because of said situation? let's say that i can understand why you're angry but come on.

    and i loved the comment that you should call her a slut and a bitch so that she'll break up with him. way to go.

    again: it's MARRIAGE. jesus fukking christ.
    jesus fukking christ.
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    Originally Posted by Daewoo_Lanos View Post
    alcoholism is a disease.
    whenever i hear it i rage. nobody forces people to drink. becoming an alcoholic is a result of a series of bad choices. it's an addiction, not a disease. is being addicted to nicotine a disease? no. is being addicted to drugs a disease? no. why somebody insists that people should feel sorry for alcoholics is beyond me. they do this to themselves. more than that: they do not only ruin their own lives, but they ruin other people's lives.
    is there some kind of a magical force that forces people to start drinking and to continue doing so? no. are some people more prone to it than others? yes. is it an excuse? fukk no.

    i think that it's pointless to discuss it any further. i feel very strongly about this and i'm sure other people in this thread have a point of view that won't be changed. for me if you have such problems and you can't deal with them you shouldn't have gotten married in the first place. good thing they don't have kids.
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  20. #110
    One pec, you mad? FunAndSun's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Towley View Post
    you are 100% right...I was very idealistic about it


    it does not work out...but if you must get married make sure you at least live with the chick first

    and dont EVER marry a girl because she is hot
    Like I said man, you're married, so its not just as easy as DUMP and on to the next. Her behaviour is unacceptable, and she needs have a serious look at at. It may be that its worth salvage, it may be that its not. I hope she turns it around. Its a tough situation and I hope she gets her damn act together.

    Also, there's always so many guys that are like "Oh I would never care if my girl goes out all the time, if you don't let her you're a jealous phaggot." There is a difference in doing something to be social and fun, and continually doing some thing that another person finds disrespectful, especially once you're married. You can't just do anything you want. There's got to be compromise. There's no way in hell I'd let a long term serious girlfriend go get drunk and dress slutty all the time, let alone when married. Where is the need for it when you've both made the decision to be committed? What is behind the desire to go to places that we all know are purely for hooking up?

    I fairly against marriage to western chicks in general, but that doesn't mean it may not work out for you. If you are going to attempt to brave the waters there's gotta be compromise. Hopefully she figures that out.
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  21. #111
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    Originally Posted by majszownik View Post
    i love how everybody tells op to divorce his wife instead of talk to her and try to solve the problem. this is fukking marriage, not a high school relationship.
    she stuck by you when you had an alcohol problem and you're raging because of said situation? let's say that i can understand why you're angry but come on.

    and i loved the comment that you should call her a slut and a bitch so that she'll break up with him. way to go.

    again: it's MARRIAGE. jesus fukking christ.
    I don't people are really saying to dump her immediately, I think we're just being realistic about the options. There are some things you just don't do, especially when in a committed relationship. Speaking as a woman, can you tell us how your man would react if you were doing the things Towley described?
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  22. #112
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    meh let her out exp if u just moved

    she jus wants to make friends
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    Originally Posted by majszownik View Post
    whenever i hear it i rage. nobody forces people to drink. becoming an alcoholic is a result of a series of bad choices. it's an addiction, not a disease. is being addicted to nicotine a disease? no. is being addicted to drugs a disease? no. why somebody insists that people should feel sorry for alcoholics is beyond me. they do this to themselves. more than that: they do not only ruin their own lives, but they ruin other people's lives.
    is there some kind of a magical force that forces people to start drinking and to continue doing so? no. are some people more prone to it than others? yes. is it an excuse? fukk no.
    i see this type of addiction as a disease (mental).

    i dont see an addiction to attention or to dick in the same light.
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  24. #114
    Registered User majszownik's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Daewoo_Lanos View Post
    i see this type of addiction as a disease (mental).

    i dont see an addiction to attention or to dick in the same light.
    yeah, it is a mental problem. but like i have said: nobody forces a person to start or continue drinking. what leads to the addiction is a series of CHOICES, choices that everybody know will end badly. but people who get addicted to ANYTHING blatantly ignore the fact that the results will be tragic; not only for them but also for everybody around them.

    and from what i see op hasn't dealt with his addiction and still drinks:
    Originally Posted by Towley View Post
    this..too many drinks to drive tonight but Im rolling tomorrow
    of course one might argue that he maybe drinks less, as he refers to his problem in the past tense, but an alcoholic shouldn't even tough a bottle. and some of people here suggested that he should get drunk. idiots.

    Originally Posted by FunAndSun View Post
    I don't people are really saying to dump her immediately, I think we're just being realistic about the options. There are some things you just don't do, especially when in a committed relationship. Speaking as a woman, can you tell us how your man would react if you were doing the things Towley described?
    i have read only his posts and this is what i got:
    she got out dressed like a slut without him
    got back home drunk
    said "i looked hot last night"
    went to sleep at her parents house today
    talked to ex/exes

    me and my man go out separately and don't have a problem with it. of course we also go out together, but there are times when i want to go out with my friends and i don't ask for permission or if he wants to tag along - i inform him that i'm going out. he does the same.
    do i dress sexy when i go out? sure. does it bother him? as long as i wear sexy clothes when i meet him and he's the one i'm fukking it doesn't. does it bother him that guys hit on me? no. why? cause the fact that they hit on me doesn't mean i'm interested.
    as for the drunk part: i don't drink more than two beers when i go out (or at all generally - don't like alcohol) so that's not the case.
    the "i looked hot" comment is retarded. i don't know what to make of this.
    as for talking with exes: i only had one "ex" that came into play. with that guy we weren't as much bf/gf but we tried being a couple for some time and it didn't work out. before we tried we have been friends for like 2 years. then we tried, then we went back to being friends. we were really close - talked about everything, shared secrets etc. so when i started going out with my fiance (5 years ago) i knew that i didn't want to lose a genuine friend but i also knew that my man won't be happy about me being in touch with my "ex". so i talked to both of them and i just introduced them. my fiance saw that he has nothing to worry about. i'm in touch with that guy till this day but it's like we meet once half a year, talk for 5 hours about changes in our lives and go separate ways.

    i don't know if that gives you an answer to "how would my man react" because these situations are similar but not identical.
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    Originally Posted by Towley View Post
    another update for misc....sorry I did not reply sooner

    cliffs on Towleys marriage

    -met in college...always "best friends"...AKA friend zone (she honestly was best friend though)
    -graduated (she was 1 year behind me)
    -moved, got a good job, stopped being WK Phaggot, had a few girlfriends, nice car, better style, you get it
    -didnt see her for 2-3 years, talked once in a while, would talk about new job/girlfriends/etc
    -she moves to other side of country with some dude
    -didnt work out, she flew across the county to see me
    -no longer WK...hit it the 2nd night...she initated it (shot her down at first)
    -Towley gets dem feelings, so does she, flys across country multiple times
    -had alcohol problem for a whiel now, it gets out of control at this point for whatever reason
    -eloped!
    -wife moves back home...after a few months I move too
    -move here and everything goes south


    Im pretty sure thats why Im having issues now...Im in her world...no crew of guys, not framiliar with area, dont do much besides work, etc

    things have been downhill since I moved here....shes talking to ex's, has no interest in sex, constant arguing
    Bolded is pretty much the exact formula for a cheating spouse is it not?
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  26. #116
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    Bro u got a problem

    Women today are just skanky whores.

    My girlfriend doesn't go out drinking period, because she knows her friends are ****ing slutty whores and would sway her into bad decisions. Also, she knows she wouldn't want me out at a bar with a bunch of skanks around.

    I'm 24 and I don't drink, my girlfriend will have a glass or two of wine if we go out to dinner, but thats it..


    Also, my girlfriend and I have both said and agree with this. The only reason I ever went to bars in the first place was to get some ass. Same with girls. They only go to the bars because their lonely and want to find a dude.

    if your wife still is regularly going out either shes looking for dick, or she needs to get her **** together and grow up.

    People that regularly drink alcohol are either single or have issues that they hide behind the alcohol, PERIOD.

    No if ands or buts,

    If i wanted bro time I wouldn't go to a bar, cost too much to drink (which I don't anymore anyways) and it's a ****ing ****ty ass enviornment.

    Your wife is not a keeper, if it were me divorce paperswould be signed already.

    ****, if it was me never woulda wifed her.
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  27. #117
    Muscle Is Sexy.... Focused2BFit's Avatar
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    At the very least she is taking you for granted OP. It sounds to me like she is young and likes the excitement of something new and having someone chase after her and make her feel desired. Things were all good and you had her primary interest when you were the one doing all this now that she has you locked down she is looking for new attention. It's common for a girl that's young and insecure to do this BS, she has no regard IMO for what marriage and vows mean. She doesn't sound ready or worthy. Remind her of the commitment she made and how her behavior doesn't reflect her commitment or love. Also be clear and solid that you will not stand for this kind of treatment... unless you will. Make it very clear.
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    Originally Posted by Towley View Post
    moved from long island to the end of the earth after getting married

    no friends here (besides co-workers, but dont hang out with them)

    left my crew of guys in LI, all I do is work

    wife goes out with sister, skanky friends, dressed like slut

    WTF is this?? not worried Ill get cheated on but this is bull****

    **RESPECT SRS TAG**

    anyone else in my shoes? im too old for this ****
    That's what happens when you marry an american woman (AKA ameriskank). What did you expect? Honestly...


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  29. #119
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    To all you that think you need to save the marriage. Why? It sounds like it was dysfunctional from the start. Did you read his post? They got married, then she left him to move back home. He followed her there (I'm guessing to try and make it work). She has zero respect for him. How is him going to her like a beta asking "lets talk about it" going to solve anything when she doesn't even seem interested anymore? Short of some counseling, I don't see talking it out working in this situation. Especially with their apparent complete lack of communication. I'm not saying it would be impossible, I just don't' see it happening.

    In general, women are the talkers. If she wanted to fix the relationship. She would be the one "wanting to talk about it." The fact that she is ditching him, hanging out with x's (and maybe not x's anymore), not wanting to talk things through, aren't good signs.

    Originally Posted by rileybriggs View Post
    White Knight to the rescue. its always the dudes fault when woman does something wrong right?
    Things are seldom one sided in a relationship. There are two sides to every story. Just because someone is suggesting that the OP might have something to do with his issues doesn't make him a WK. It usually takes two people to screw up a relationship. The OP also didn't respond to my questions for him on the first page that went to this line of reasoning. The wife saying "I was so hot" was either trying to:

    1. Disrespect the OP by rubbing it in his face

    2. Wanting attention/trying to make him jealous so he pays attention to her.

    3. Both.

    I'm not sure which. But the comment about him not paying his wife enough attention is a legitimate one.

    OP, on the first page I asked if this is how it was when you first moved to VT? Or did she ever invite you out/try to include you and you were a stick in the mud and wanted to stay home and not go out? As I said, I have seen this happen before. Guys don't want to do things, girl gets bored, gets new group of friends, starts banging one of them. Or did she just ditch you from the start when you moved there? Not saying its right for her to do that. Just that I have seen it before and its pretty common.
    Last edited by J411; 11-01-2010 at 03:00 AM.
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  30. #120
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    Read all 4 pages OP. Really sorry for what you going through. I'm going with.. well, everybody else on this thread and saying shi t don't look good at all bro. Keep us updated though.
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