Can a girl who had a "slutty stage" in her life be made gf material?

[A1lthatrema1ns]

i never post in the RH section, but i saw this thread and felt like posting

My current gf was my hs crush, the one girl in hs i always dreamed of ****ing but never could...one of the popular party girls. sophmore year she ****ed 9 guys. yes, lost her virginity at the beginning, and by the end of summer had been with 9 guys....I think most would agree thats whore status, especially at the age of 14-15.

Well, she became horribly ill...she was diagnosed with CFS, as well as many other medical issues at the very beginning of junior year. She took a nosedive and became so ill, constantly in pain, always had to be drugged up with muscle relaxers and other various painkillers like tylenol/codeine....Her illness drove her to the point where she didnt want to live anymore, and she attempted suicide 3 times, but wasnt successful.

She had finally overcome the illness around early 2009, and she is a completely different person. She is not the person she was in highschool, now being 21 years old. Its really incredible to see how far shes come, and how her illness opened up her eyes to what really matters in life and what doesnt, her priorities are so much different than they were. She tried dating in 2008 when she was still fairly sick, had a boyfriend for like 3/4 of a year but they were constantly fighting and breaking up. Im the 11th guy she has been with, and she is definitely gf material....not even gf material, she is wife material. Its been rough getting over her past history with guys cuz it was pretty ridiculous, but i am just blessed to be the one she has ended up with and im so happy shes alive and happier with me then she ever has been in her entire life.


long read but worth it imo.

cliffs:
answer to OP's question: yes

[wtfbbq]

The slut stage occurs in women AND men, or are you unaware? The guys on here who are able to pull strange and enjoy doing so are going through theirs. It's a stage of life for most normal people in their mid/late teens, just as much as having acne.

I've no doubt that for many young women, lack of self-esteem is behind their actions. While sex is going on, they feel wanted/loved/desired/whatever. But many other young women just like sex and see no reason why a guy can sleep around and a girl can't. Attitudes are changing, although not yours, obviously.

But if you seriously think someone aged 30 should be judged on anything they might have done when they were 17, you're wrong. It's irrelevant.

Please see previous page and answer my questions

[wtfbbq]

i never post in the RH section, but i saw this thread and felt like posting

My current gf was my hs crush, the one girl in hs i always dreamed of ****ing but never could...one of the popular party girls. sophmore year she ****ed 9 guys. yes, lost her virginity at the beginning, and by the end of summer had been with 9 guys....I think most would agree thats whore status, especially at the age of 14-15.

Well, she became horribly ill...she was diagnosed with CFS, as well as many other medical issues at the very beginning of junior year. She took a nosedive and became so ill, constantly in pain, always had to be drugged up with muscle relaxers and other various painkillers like tylenol/codeine....Her illness drove her to the point where she didnt want to live anymore, and she attempted suicide 3 times, but wasnt successful.

She had finally overcome the illness around early 2009, and she is a completely different person. She is not the person she was in highschool, now being 21 years old. Its really incredible to see how far shes come, and how her illness opened up her eyes to what really matters in life and what doesnt, her priorities are so much different than they were. She tried dating in 2008 when she was still fairly sick, had a boyfriend for like 3/4 of a year but they were constantly fighting and breaking up. Im the 11th guy she has been with, and she is definitely gf material....not even gf material, she is wife material. Its been rough getting over her past history with guys cuz it was pretty ridiculous, but i am just blessed to be the one she has ended up with and im so happy shes alive and happier with me then she ever has been in her entire life.


long read but worth it imo.

cliffs:
answer to OP's question: yes

How long would that have gone on if she hadn't became ill? Just wondering

[The_Reaper]

Even sluts have standards and morals. You think the hot girl who's maybe shagged 10 guys hasn't turned down another 100? But even though she's turned down ten times as many guys as she's shagged, she's still someone who doesn't respect herself, etc.

Re the actual thread title ... there were two local girls who could be considered slutty (I dislike the term used in a derogatory manner). Slutty because they slept with about six of the 15 guys in my wrestling fed. Then one of them got pregnant and totally stopped slutting around. She's entirely concentrating on motherhood now.

The "slutty stage" is simply a process of finding yourself. A young woman is just realising how much power she has over men (young men) and learning how to deal with it. If you're 16/17 and suddenly everyone you know wants to sex you up, it's gonna go to your head. They have every right to enjoy it. Someone said why do they do stuff that they're going to have to apologise for later - well at the time they're doing it, they don't know if they'll regret it later or are unaware (due to inexperience of life) that they will be judged for it. Maybe sleeping with random people isn't a good idea, but who knows that at 16? The transition from childhood to mature adult is a long, drawn out process during which everyone is learning how to deal with everything, and obviously people are going to make mistakes/bad decisions. Judging anyone for anything they do in their teens is misguided, because teenagers may think they know everything, but in reality they know nothing.

The "slutty stage" is not a process of finding yourself, unless by finding yourself you mean "taking multiple cocks in your cunt"

[SouthernFried]

If I had firsthand knowledge this "slutty" stage then never. What you don't know won't hurt you...unless she did pornos or had STDs.

[A1lthatrema1ns]

How long would that have gone on if she hadn't became ill? Just wondering

She probably wouldnt be any different if she hadn't gotten sick, im sure eventually she'd calm down a little.

[wtfbbq]

If I had firsthand knowledge this "slutty" stage then never. What you don't know won't hurt you...unless she did pornos or had STDs.

I agree not asking would be the best bet. Most never would admit to it if you did though.

She probably wouldnt be any different if she hadn't gotten sick, im sure eventually she'd calm down a little.

Just sayin it could have been 30+ and you may have never ended up with her. The sickness was a blessing in disguise.

[Tiffany Wantsmore]

In what amount of time? Standards could mean to them that the 100 weren't attractive

The same amount of time in which she slept with the 10 guys. And I thought you said sluts don't have standards?

Wow being a parent after you get knocked up is quite a bit to ask of someone. She most likely didn't get pregnant on purpose

No, she didn't. But now she's got a child, she's changed her outlook, ie. people can change.

Biggest bunch of bs yet. How is taking a bunch of strange dick finding yourself?

Well I've slept with 3 random guys so far and I just have no idea who I am. Now it's 8 and gosh darn it I just can't figure myself out. Now it's 12 and I get it, I'm a whore.

It's not just "taking dick", it's learning about men, about relationships, about sex, about what you like and dislike, about boundaries, about self-respect, about everything.

So they are abusing their power?

Yes. It's a new power and they're learning how to wield it. Meanwhile, guys are learning how to resist it.

They do have every right to enjoy as does anyone but they know exactly what they are doing and what it will make them look like. Girls know what the term slut is used for before they are 16

They don't know. You can say to a teenager "if you do such and such it will impact on your whole adult life" but it's something that's impossible to understand at that age. A teen thinks anyone over 30 is past it. Then you get to 30 and realise you've barely started. Then you start thinking "god I was a twat in my teens, lol".

Are you saying when you went through that stage you didn't know what you were doing?

How exactly did you find yourself?

I was looking for something. Acceptance, love. I did have low self-esteem and knowing a guy was hot for me made me feel good. Women of all ages enjoy attention, even women older than me. I still enjoy that feeling now ... but now I know how to deal with things. I would say "control things" but you would get the wrong idea and I cba to go into detail. It's a woman thing.

Now I no longer have low self-esteem and don't need to find acceptance (and haven't needed to since 1991), there's no need to continue with that behaviour. I have a bf now, but before we got together I had a fuk buddy or two, which had nothing to do with self-esteem or validation, and everything to do with wanting sex on the regular but not wanting the hassle of a relationship. Of course that makes me a slut in your eyes, but the opinion of some random guy on the internet doesn't matter to me.

[Burzmali]

[QUOTE=wtfbbq;561231261][QUOTE=Burzmali;561218251]

Just because I think kids shouldn't be raised by parents who are ****ing 3 different people each? That's just ****ing retarded.

A marriage where the parents fight all the time isn't good either. If it gets that bad they should get a divorce.

If they are divorced, yeah it's not as good for the kids, I know from experience. There are certain things you may not learn if the parents remain single.

If they are raised by parents who see/sleep with numerous people the world will go to **** even faster. Ever seen Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas? When all the reptiles are ****ing each other? Probably what the future will look like.

The parents should either be together or apart completely.

Wow, I'm done in this thread.

You think that a household that constantly fights or is divorced is a better environment to raise children then two happily married people that discreetly sleep with other people.

Just, wow.

I mean I understand the biological reason why you're so insecure and jealous: you don't want to waste resources on offspring that might not be yours. But damn.

Fact: what you want doesn't work.

[majszownik]

[QUOTE=Burzmali;561247891][QUOTE=wtfbbq;561231261]

two happily married people that discreetly sleep with other people.

i think that's one of the most retarded things i've read on RH. and that says a lot.
but what did i expect, this whole thread is so stupid it hurts.

and about slutty stage being about learning: it's more about looking for something that can't be found that way. and it is about learning that it really can't be found that way.

[A1lthatrema1ns]

Just sayin it could have been 30+ and you may have never ended up with her. The sickness was a blessing in disguise.

i agree 100%

[Burzmali]

[QUOTE=majszownik;561250641][QUOTE=Burzmali;561247891]

i think that's one of the most retarded things i've read on RH. and that says a lot.
but what did i expect, this whole thread is so stupid it hurts.

and about slutty stage being about learning: it's more about looking for something that can't be found that way. and it is about learning that it really can't be found that way.

You're still on that Disney fantasy.

I'm sure you will live happily ever after with your little beta provider boy.

No, wait. You'll get bored and either be unhappy, cheat, or go separate ways. Or some combination thereof.

[majszownik]

You're still on that Disney fantasy.

I'm sure you will live happily ever after with your little beta provider boy.

No, wait. You'll get bored and either be unhappy, cheat, or go separate ways. Or some combination thereof.

FIRST OFF DON"T SAY SH*T ABOUT MY MAN CAUSE I WILL FIND YOU AND KILL YOU AND RAPE YOUR ASS (not necessarily in that order) AND I MEAN THAT YOU STUPID MOTHER*****R.

and second, if people are happy they don't cheat. so "happily married people who cheat" IS absurd.

and don't you dare tell me what i will do. i'm in a realtionship of 5 years and i fukking know better then you do. and i'm fukking happy so FUKK OFF.

[exy]

Didn't read thread

but I had a gf like this

I dumped her, and she went and ****ed a guy who told everyone he ****er her and trash talked her (I didn't know about the guy the whole time) the night when I dumped her.

Now she's all up on my dik and her parents want us to reunite, she wants us to reunite, because she know's she won't meet an alpha guy like me any time soon, or ever.

No. Never again. NEVER FORGET.

[wrath_story]

i think that's one of the most retarded things i've read on RH. and that says a lot.
but what did i expect, this whole thread is so stupid it hurts.

and about slutty stage being about learning: it's more about looking for something that can't be found that way. and it is about learning that it really can't be found that way.

i disagree with that idiot as well, but im not sure what you mean the whole thread is stupid. If you've been reading since page 1 do you think my ideas are absurd and im dreaming, do you think what im saying has no merit?

I want to hear your thoughts. This thread is probably the only one in which i posted the most replies, and only 3 people agreed with me.

FIRST OFF DON"T SAY SH*T ABOUT MY MAN CAUSE I WILL FIND YOU AND KILL YOU AND RAPE YOUR ASS (not necessarily in that order) AND I MEAN THAT YOU STUPID MOTHER*****R.

and second, if people are happy they don't cheat. so "happily married people who cheat" IS absurd.

and don't you dare tell me what i will do. i'm in a realtionship of 5 years and i fukking know better then you do. and i'm fukking happy so FUKK OFF.

completely agreed with the bolded part.

and dont get so upset you wont have to kill that guy, he'll do it to himself eventually once he realizes what a fuked up lifestyle he has.

[NOVA888]

i'm fukking happy so FUKK OFF.

Awesome! I want this on a t-shirt!

[wtfbbq]

[QUOTE=Burzmali;561247891][QUOTE=wtfbbq;561231261]

Wow, I'm done in this thread.

You think that a household that constantly fights or is divorced is a better environment to raise children then two happily married people that discreetly sleep with other people.

Just, wow.

I mean I understand the biological reason why you're so insecure and jealous: you don't want to waste resources on offspring that might not be yours. But damn.

Fact: what you want doesn't work.

[QUOTE=Burzmali;561251751][QUOTE=majszownik;561250641]

You're still on that Disney fantasy.

I'm sure you will live happily ever after with your little beta provider boy.

No, wait. You'll get bored and either be unhappy, cheat, or go separate ways. Or some combination thereof.

Now you are saying they are discreetly ****ing around. Confused much?

What is the point in being married if you are sleeping with other people?

[wrath_story]

No, she didn't. But now she's got a child, she's changed her outlook, ie. people can change.

Yeah except that their past is always there.

It's not just "taking dick", it's learning about men, about relationships, about sex, about what you like and dislike, about boundaries, about self-respect, about everything

Getting your vagina stuffed does not translate into learning, it provides whore training, self respect is never present.

Yes. It's a new power and they're learning how to wield it. Meanwhile, guys are learning how to resist it.

you dont wield by engaging in it. Guys dont resist shyt, they go after what they can get, when they can get, and all they can get.

They don't know. You can say to a teenager "if you do such and such it will impact on your whole adult life" but it's something that's impossible to understand at that age. A teen thinks anyone over 30 is past it. Then you get to 30 and realise you've barely started. Then you start thinking "god I was a twat in my teens, lol".

I understood, and i dont have to think about what a twat i was. People only understand the thigns they choose to

I was looking for something. Acceptance, love. I did have low self-esteem and knowing a guy was hot for me made me feel good. Women of all ages enjoy attention, even women older than me. I still enjoy that feeling now ... but now I know how to deal with things. I would say "control things" but you would get the wrong idea and I cba to go into detail. It's a woman thing.

Yeah and im sure you got lots of love and acceptance during the process of "finding yourself". Love in its truest form.

Now I no longer have low self-esteem and don't need to find acceptance (and haven't needed to since 1991), there's no need to continue with that behaviour. I have a bf now, but before we got together I had a fuk buddy or two, which had nothing to do with self-esteem or validation, and everything to do with wanting sex on the regular but not wanting the hassle of a relationship. Of course that makes me a slut in your eyes, but the opinion of some random guy on the internet doesn't matter to me.

Your bf is a male stripper, do you really think a lot of young people would prefer to heed your relationship advice?

[wtfbbq]

The same amount of time in which she slept with the 10 guys. And I thought you said sluts don't have standards?

Most of the real slutty ones don't have standards. But that is different than having morals. No slut has those

No, she didn't. But now she's got a child, she's changed her outlook, ie. people can change.

Being a teenage mom is a hard way to learn that isn't it?

It's not just "taking dick", it's learning about men, about relationships, about sex, about what you like and dislike, about boundaries, about self-respect, about everything.

Big no on the self respect part. And do you really need to sleep with a bunch of guys, especially ones you don't know to learn about relationships, sex and what you like?

Yes. It's a new power and they're learning how to wield it. Meanwhile, guys are learning how to resist it.

That IMO makes it even worse.

I was looking for something. Acceptance, love. I did have low self-esteem and knowing a guy was hot for me made me feel good. Women of all ages enjoy attention, even women older than me. I still enjoy that feeling now ... but now I know how to deal with things. I would say "control things" but you would get the wrong idea and I cba to go into detail. It's a woman thing.

Lol at looking for love part, come on. Enjoying the attention is one thing, controlling yourself is another. Amazing how it raises your self esteem yet down the road it could lower it so much.

Now I no longer have low self-esteem and don't need to find acceptance (and haven't needed to since 1991), there's no need to continue with that behaviour. I have a bf now, but before we got together I had a fuk buddy or two, which had nothing to do with self-esteem or validation, and everything to do with wanting sex on the regular but not wanting the hassle of a relationship. Of course that makes me a slut in your eyes, but the opinion of some random guy on the internet doesn't matter to me.

An f buddy? Not that bad of a thing, especially if you know them farely well. Numerous f buddies or ONS, another thing imo.

I personally have friends guys and girls that have been what I would consider sluts or former sluts. Do I think of them less as people? Nope

I wouldn't hold anyone I wanted to be in a relationship with to any higher standards than I do myself.


EDIT: lol at wrath saying the same ****^^

[wrath_story]

Now you are saying they are discreetly ****ing around. Confused much?

What is the point in being married if you are sleeping with other people?

Yeah these are the kinds of people i argue with everytime i enter these threads, so it only serves me right being flamed and have my advice disregarded.

You know something else, being involved in this thread has convinced me to leave my account on this site, SRS, i thought it happened in kinetic's thread, but i wasnt fully convinced, after this thread i think im fully convinced to leave for good.

The only valuable posts here came from demetria, you, myself, and few others who have contributed with their few posts.

Ill hear what majszownik says and then i gtfo of here.

[SouthernFried]

I had a fuk buddy or two, which had nothing to do with self-esteem or validation, and everything to do with wanting sex on the regular but not wanting the hassle of a relationship. Of course that makes me a slut in your eyes

You are right it does, but I'm conservative like that. I'm also a hypocrite with double standards when it comes to men and women. Not afraid to admit it either.

[NOVA888]

I wouldn't hold anyone I wanted to be in a relationship with to any higher standards than I do myself.

I'm not going to lie. Although I've never done the sex/soul searching thing--I do, however, enjoy the notion of a well-seasoned man. And the reason I love it is because it takes work for heterosexual men to get laid, so it's a triumph IMO.

If some gay dude goes around bragging that he's had lots of sex, I just roll my eyes. What's the big deal in that? Feels like he's abusing his power by sexual rampaging, same with women.

But straight dudes? I like them DIRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRTY!!!!!!! Or to at least pretend they're dirty.

[majszownik]

Yeah these are the kinds of people i argue with everytime i enter these threads, so it only serves me right being flamed and have my advice disregarded.

You know something else, being involved in this thread has convinced me to leave my account on this site, SRS, i thought it happened in kinetic's thread, but i wasnt fully convinced, after this thread i think im fully convinced to leave for good.

The only valuable posts here came from demetria, you, myself, and few others who have contributed with their few posts.

Ill hear what majszownik says and then i gtfo of here.

i'll post in like an hour or so cause now i've got work to do.

[wtfbbq]

I'm not going to lie. Although I've never done the sex/soul searching thing--I do, however, enjoy the notion of a well-seasoned man. And the reason I love it is because it takes work for heterosexual men to get laid, so it's a triumph IMO.

If some gay dude goes around bragging that he's had lots of sex, I just roll my eyes. What's the big deal in that? Feels like he's abusing his power by sexual rampaging, same with women.

But straight dudes? I like them DIRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRTY!!!!!!! Or to at least pretend they're dirty.

I knew you would be hitting on me sooner or later

Really though, I've stated before I want to get more experience and want to be good at it. I'm not sure I want to do that by hooking up with numerous bar flys though. If I were getting into a relationship with someone and they judged me solely on that, I'm not sure what I would think. It's definitley a huge aspect of a relationship but if the girl was less experienced than me and not very good, we could always work to make her better and vise versa

[wtfbbq]

Doc why you mad bro?

[SouthernFried]

i'll post in like an hour or so cause now i've got work to do.

I didn't know that you were so crazy. Threatening to kill people online?

[NOVA888]

Yeah these are the kinds of people i argue with everytime i enter these threads, so it only serves me right being flamed and have my advice disregarded.

You shouldn't be upset. I find it similar to informing a room full of stock brokers that you'd prefer to save your money, and NOT play the market.

[wrath_story]

I'm not going to lie. Although I've never done the sex/soul searching thing--I do, however, enjoy the notion of a well-seasoned man. And the reason I love it is because it takes work for heterosexual men to get laid, so it's a triumph IMO.

If some gay dude goes around bragging that he's had lots of sex, I just roll my eyes. What's the big deal in that? Feels like he's abusing his power by sexual rampaging, same with women.

But straight dudes? I like them DIRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRTY!!!!!!! Or to at least pretend they're dirty.

I dont really consider this right or wrong, i think that for most women it's natural to think this way. Just as with all things girls love the thought of their man being desired by other women, even their friends. The fact that her man had his pick at others and then picked and stayed with her makes her feel special out of the whole bunch.

With guys it's completely opposite, we hate the fact that others may consider out gf hot because we know it greatly increases her chances to be lured into something we dont want her doing. Guys may boast about the fact that they like to show off their 'trophy/prize gf/wife' but deep down inside every guy feels annoyed when his gf gets constant male attention every time she goes out. I know some guys who turned those kind of girls down because they dont want to deal with all the bullshyt that comes with having a hot girlfriend SRS.

just a thought.

i'll post in like an hour or so cause now i've got work to do.

that's fine, ill wait.

[wrath_story]

I knew you would be hitting on me sooner or later

Really though, I've stated before I want to get more experience and want to be good at it. I'm not sure I want to do that by hooking up with numerous bar flys though. If I were getting into a relationship with someone and they judged me solely on that, I'm not sure what I would think. It's definitley a huge aspect of a relationship but if the girl was less experienced than me and not very good, we could always work to make her better and vise versa

the experience factor does not apply to every woman, everyone is different, there are girls out there who would prefer you to be just as inexperienced as they are and they may turn out to be better than those who think otherwise.

As i said before i dont think for any quality girl your experience should be the deciding factor, things you value, stand by, your morals and principles as well as strong personality trump all those things.

[wrath_story]

Doc why you mad bro?

dont mind him, it's only a red dot, most people prefer doing that as opposed to arguing the point they know they gonna lose.