First time BULKERS apply here ;)

[freebirdmac]

So confused! Just started on bb.com (thats why my bodyspace has no pics or much info but its hard to find the time being a single mommy to a 3rd grader (oh and a 6 month old great dane puppy
Anyway i'm 32, 5'8" and 118lbs probably 23%bf but i am mostly flab and jiggle. Been spinning my wheels for 3 yrs working out with very little change...doing everything wrong..too much cardio, too little cals, binge eating, lost my period, high cortisol for a while..really i'm just completely miserable. I want a lean muscular look not a skinny fat.
People have suggested bulking but i'm so scared because i already have a muffin top (may be some water weight from 2 yr undiagnosed abdominal pain) Can someone tell me what i am supposed to do? I've been eating more but i just swell up to looking 4 or 5 months pregnant and feel disgusting! This is my 3rd year living in sweats and baggy tshirts (including the summer) Will my body ever change?

Thanks to anyone who may reply

From your stats it's clear you need to gain muscle mass. Losing fat will not get you looking better. Just smaller. Yes you will gain additional fat doing this, but it should not be huge amounts! Nor should you look 4 or 5 months pregnant. Those symptoms sound like a food sensitivity. Dairy and gluten being the prime suspects. Possibly soy as well. So yes, get the cals up, maybe move to a different diet and eliminate the usual tummy problem suspects, and hit the weights hard.

[take.it.off]

Well ladies... I officially do not have to worry about bulking too much and not fitting into a bridemaid dress in June - I decided to break it off with my boyfriend after almost 4 years together. As a result, I've been kicked out of his sisters wedding party and told not to show my face at the wedding either. It was harsh, but I understand why I guess...though I always thought her and I were friends...

Anyways, he was highly unsupportive of my goals, discouraging (ashamed of my journey and would tease me) and had very unhealthy habits (I won't go into detail, but let's just say 'alchy' played a big role). These traits, I finally realized, I didn't want in my life anymore - no matter how great he could be at times. Not to mention I finally admitted to myself I hadn't been happy in FOREVER. I actually feel like a big weight has lifted from my shoulders. He often used guilt and manipulation to control me...and It took me going away to St. Lucia for a week (without him) to feel a breath of fresh air. I'm very happy with my choice.

So, having said that, I am into my full on bulk right now! I've certainly filled out a bit and my shirts are a bit snugger around my stomach, but I am actually happy with how I look. I don't look chunky or fat... just fuller. And I am so much stronger! My weights are increasing quite quickly.

I feel like this is a new beginning for me! I am very excited for what lies ahead. Now I just have to deal with seperating from the condo with my ex haha. Wow, it feels weird saying 'ex'.

Anyways, thanks for listening! I am very thankful for the support here! It got me through my 1 year and 3 month cutting journey, even when my boyfriend hated every minute of it and tried everything in his power to sweep it under the rug. You guys kept me going!

-Kristen

P.S. I just registered to go to courses to become a Nutrition and Wellness Specialist this year! I should have it by mid or end of June Plus I just completed my certificate in Plant Based Nutrition through Cornell University...so I am feeling like I am well on my way! YAY!

[Locavore]

Sorry about your break up, Kristen, though it sounds like you absolutely have the right outlook. New beginnings! Rock on.

(... This is me dipping my toe into the bulking thread. I'm about ready to take the plunge.)

[andrerox80]

Sorry about your break up, Kristen, though it sounds like you absolutely have the right outlook. New beginnings! Rock on.

i second this. that must have been really rough - 4 yrs is a long time, and even if you know it's for the best and things weren't right and you weren't treated well, it's a major life change and a loss. but you def seem to have a great attitude. on to bigger and better things!

(... This is me dipping my toe into the bulking thread. I'm about ready to take the plunge.)

welcome!!

[freebirdmac]

Well ladies... I officially do not have to worry about bulking too much and not fitting into a bridemaid dress in June - I decided to break it off with my boyfriend after almost 4 years together. As a result, I've been kicked out of his sisters wedding party and told not to show my face at the wedding either. It was harsh, but I understand why I guess...though I always thought her and I were friends...

Anyways, he was highly unsupportive of my goals, discouraging (ashamed of my journey and would tease me) and had very unhealthy habits (I won't go into detail, but let's just say 'alchy' played a big role). These traits, I finally realized, I didn't want in my life anymore - no matter how great he could be at times. Not to mention I finally admitted to myself I hadn't been happy in FOREVER. I actually feel like a big weight has lifted from my shoulders. He often used guilt and manipulation to control me...and It took me going away to St. Lucia for a week (without him) to feel a breath of fresh air. I'm very happy with my choice.

So, having said that, I am into my full on bulk right now! I've certainly filled out a bit and my shirts are a bit snugger around my stomach, but I am actually happy with how I look. I don't look chunky or fat... just fuller. And I am so much stronger! My weights are increasing quite quickly.

I feel like this is a new beginning for me! I am very excited for what lies ahead. Now I just have to deal with seperating from the condo with my ex haha. Wow, it feels weird saying 'ex'.

Anyways, thanks for listening! I am very thankful for the support here! It got me through my 1 year and 3 month cutting journey, even when my boyfriend hated every minute of it and tried everything in his power to sweep it under the rug. You guys kept me going!

-Kristen

P.S. I just registered to go to courses to become a Nutrition and Wellness Specialist this year! I should have it by mid or end of June Plus I just completed my certificate in Plant Based Nutrition through Cornell University...so I am feeling like I am well on my way! YAY!

Good for you!! You definitely can do better. Now go have some f-u-n!

[take.it.off]

Sorry about your break up, Kristen, though it sounds like you absolutely have the right outlook. New beginnings! Rock on.

[QUOTE=andrerox80;676437401]i second this. that must have been really rough - 4 yrs is a long time, and even if you know it's for the best and things weren't right and you weren't treated well, it's a major life change and a loss. but you def seem to have a great attitude. on to bigger and better things!/QUOTE]

Good for you!! You definitely can do better. Now go have some f-u-n!

Thanks ladies! Love the support

[andrerox80]

anyone have a really hard time mentally eating the same during skip days (esp unplanned ones)? i know muscles grow during rest and recovery, and i know i'm bulking, but i feel so guilty. former ed in me or normal reaction?

[dawndm]

Same. I think my issue was bulking with too high calories, not having an efficient program, being super busy around the holidays and thus not enough gym time. Yes, I had a friggin muffin top. Plus I've been doing the same split for sooooo long, and I can't break away from it.

I will meet you back here when you get back from Hawaii.....July? The same women inspire me. Something about the camaraderie of our age group. It so empowering.

I look forward to bulking with you. I need someone to "hold my hand and walk with me."

Yes, let's do this...I can't wait. In fact I've already started upping my cals so I might be heavier once I get back from Hawaii. I plan to keep up my lifting while there.

Won't take pics and measurements until I get back for my starting point then onto 9 months of good eating....mmmmmmm!

[julysray]

Well ladies... I officially do not have to worry about bulking too much and not fitting into a bridemaid dress in June - I decided to break it off with my boyfriend after almost 4 years together. As a result, I've been kicked out of his sisters wedding party and told not to show my face at the wedding either. It was harsh, but I understand why I guess...though I always thought her and I were friends...

Anyways, he was highly unsupportive of my goals, discouraging (ashamed of my journey and would tease me) and had very unhealthy habits (I won't go into detail, but let's just say 'alchy' played a big role). These traits, I finally realized, I didn't want in my life anymore - no matter how great he could be at times. Not to mention I finally admitted to myself I hadn't been happy in FOREVER. I actually feel like a big weight has lifted from my shoulders. He often used guilt and manipulation to control me...and It took me going away to St. Lucia for a week (without him) to feel a breath of fresh air. I'm very happy with my choice.

So, having said that, I am into my full on bulk right now! I've certainly filled out a bit and my shirts are a bit snugger around my stomach, but I am actually happy with how I look. I don't look chunky or fat... just fuller. And I am so much stronger! My weights are increasing quite quickly.

I feel like this is a new beginning for me! I am very excited for what lies ahead. Now I just have to deal with seperating from the condo with my ex haha. Wow, it feels weird saying 'ex'.

Anyways, thanks for listening! I am very thankful for the support here! It got me through my 1 year and 3 month cutting journey, even when my boyfriend hated every minute of it and tried everything in his power to sweep it under the rug. You guys kept me going!

-Kristen

P.S. I just registered to go to courses to become a Nutrition and Wellness Specialist this year! I should have it by mid or end of June Plus I just completed my certificate in Plant Based Nutrition through Cornell University...so I am feeling like I am well on my way! YAY!

i dont want to say how sad or even sorry because it doesnt seem like him being in your life was a positive thing so congrats on making a decision to better your life even more good luck with thebulk and i like your thoughts on how you look not fat or chunky but full thats how i feel about myself too

[Freak17]

How's it going ladies? It's been a while I haven't posted, I've been very busy with school/finals. I hope all is well! :-)

[ms_mac]

Hi ladies. Just checking in. And I have a question for any of you - my weight has been going like this for the last few weeks:

Feb 18 121.8
Feb 25 121.2
Mar 3 121.6
Mar 11 122
Mar 18 120.6
Mar 25 123.2
April 1 122
April 8 125.6
April 15 125.2
April 22 122.4
April 29 125
May 6 121.8


My cals during this time have remained at 23-2400, and cardio has remained the same. Why do I just keep swinging back and forth? Seems I am not making any headway....one week up a couple lbs, next week down, etc....I am thinking I need to maybe increase again to something like 25-2600? I don't know.....

Any suggestions as to why this happens and have any of you experienced this?

[freebirdmac]

Hi ladies. Just checking in. And I have a question for any of you - my weight has been going like this for the last few weeks:

Feb 18 121.8
Feb 25 121.2
Mar 3 121.6
Mar 11 122
Mar 18 120.6
Mar 25 123.2
April 1 122
April 8 125.6
April 15 125.2
April 22 122.4
April 29 125
May 6 121.8


My cals during this time have remained at 23-2400, and cardio has remained the same. Why do I just keep swinging back and forth? Seems I am not making any headway....one week up a couple lbs, next week down, etc....I am thinking I need to maybe increase again to something like 25-2600? I don't know.....

Any suggestions as to why this happens and have any of you experienced this?

Yeah, looks like some good water fluctuations. How do you feel you look? It sure seems like you can go up another 250 cals

[kmcelestino]

Hi ladies. Just checking in. And I have a question for any of you - my weight has been going like this for the last few weeks:

Feb 18 121.8
Feb 25 121.2
Mar 3 121.6
Mar 11 122
Mar 18 120.6
Mar 25 123.2
April 1 122
April 8 125.6
April 15 125.2
April 22 122.4
April 29 125
May 6 121.8


My cals during this time have remained at 23-2400, and cardio has remained the same. Why do I just keep swinging back and forth? Seems I am not making any headway....one week up a couple lbs, next week down, etc....I am thinking I need to maybe increase again to something like 25-2600? I don't know.....

Any suggestions as to why this happens and have any of you experienced this?

Me too. Same issue. The same 2 lbs up, next week 2 lbs down, then half lb fluctuations. I am eating about 2200-2300 calories as well. If I use BMR + activity level being moderate, I should be eating something like 1600 for maintenance, so 2200 is quite a bit more. This is really frustrating....... feel like I can't get it right.

[freebirdmac]

Me too. Same issue. The same 2 lbs up, next week 2 lbs down, then half lb fluctuations. I am eating about 2200-2300 calories as well. If I use BMR + activity level being moderate, I should be eating something like 1600 for maintenance, so 2200 is quite a bit more. This is really frustrating....... feel like I can't get it right.

1600 is not your maintenance. Even I can maintain on 1800 or so. Up your cals too

[dreahere]

After weeks of feeling positive and great and not even whining much in my journal, I'm having a bad bulking day, ladies. I usually work every Saturday, but i had today off, so I used my extra free time productively ::eyeroll:: taking nekkid pics of myself from the back and side with the camera self-timer to *really* see what's going on with my glutes and saddlebags. And then when that didn't depress me quite enough, I took some more pictures of myself wearing this pair of really tiny clingy stretch jeans that I bought as sort of goal jeans (yeah, on a bulk, that makes sense, Andrea). Consensus: my butt and thighs do look better from the side, but my butt still has a weird flat spot from the back and the chunk on the back of my thighs is still horrendous and my thighs look like sausage escaping its casing in those jeans and, god, is my posture horrible. And I shouldn't be bulking.

Except I do know I should be bulking, 'cause that weird flat spot ain't gonna fill in from losing *more* fat, and it's those jeans that suck, not my body. Or something like that. My posture is still horrible, though.

I just had to let that all out. Now I'll stop whining.

[freebirdmac]

After weeks of feeling positive and great and not even whining much in my journal, I'm having a bad bulking day, ladies. I usually work every Saturday, but i had today off, so I used my extra free time productively ::eyeroll:: taking nekkid pics of myself from the back and side with the camera self-timer to *really* see what's going on with my glutes and saddlebags. And then when that didn't depress me quite enough, I took some more pictures of myself wearing this pair of really tiny clingy stretch jeans that I bought as sort of goal jeans (yeah, on a bulk, that makes sense, Andrea). Consensus: my butt and thighs do look better from the side, but my butt still has a weird flat spot from the back and the chunk on the back of my thighs is still horrendous and my thighs look like sausage escaping its casing in those jeans and, god, is my posture horrible. And I shouldn't be bulking.

Except I do know I should be bulking, 'cause that weird flat spot ain't gonna fill in from losing *more* fat, and it's those jeans that suck, not my body. Or something like that. My posture is still horrible, though.

I just had to let that all out. Now I'll stop whining.

Awww, girl, never do that again on a bulk Seriously. I knew my bad areas were growing, and bought larger jeans, but no way would I take picts or try to fit into goal clothes. That is really screwing with yourself! Lol!

My posture sucks too. I've been trying to think about it every time I stand/walk. Maybe in time it won't feel so weird.

[andrerox80]

After weeks of feeling positive and great and not even whining much in my journal, I'm having a bad bulking day, ladies. I usually work every Saturday, but i had today off, so I used my extra free time productively ::eyeroll:: taking nekkid pics of myself from the back and side with the camera self-timer to *really* see what's going on with my glutes and saddlebags. And then when that didn't depress me quite enough, I took some more pictures of myself wearing this pair of really tiny clingy stretch jeans that I bought as sort of goal jeans (yeah, on a bulk, that makes sense, Andrea). Consensus: my butt and thighs do look better from the side, but my butt still has a weird flat spot from the back and the chunk on the back of my thighs is still horrendous and my thighs look like sausage escaping its casing in those jeans and, god, is my posture horrible. And I shouldn't be bulking.

Except I do know I should be bulking, 'cause that weird flat spot ain't gonna fill in from losing *more* fat, and it's those jeans that suck, not my body. Or something like that. My posture is still horrible, though.

I just had to let that all out. Now I'll stop whining.

aww, i'm sorry. no matter what that can mess w/ your head, but esp when bulking. not the right time! am glad you have a place to vent abt it, and i'm happier still that before today's debacle and feeling so crappy, you've been happy bulking. that's quite a feat, my friend. to get into the mindset. i am still in the guilt, this-feels-wrong-even-though-i-know-it's-right stage. people talk abt embracing the suck, but there's def something abt embracing the bulk too. it's hard mentally, but sounds like in general you're doing well w/ it. hopefully you'll wake up in the am feeling renewed and happy to be bulking. for today, just keep doing what you need to do, keep telling yourself all the reasons you should be bulking now, know you can cut later, and also know that everyone has bad and feeling fat days.

[ms_mac]

Yeah, looks like some good water fluctuations. How do you feel you look? It sure seems like you can go up another 250 cals

Most days I feel that I look good and I really feel great with the extra calories. I have to admit I have never really bulked this long before. I was just too scared. Just like all the rest of the ladies here...but I have found the error of my ways I have some fluff around the my belly, but its not bothering me this time. So onwards and upwards! More cals here I come. Going to aim for 2600 this week. Today should not be a problem - my girls are taking me out for breakfast for Mothers Day (buffet...YUMM) and then we're all going to a BBQ at my Mom and Dad's tonight. LOL!

Me too. Same issue. The same 2 lbs up, next week 2 lbs down, then half lb fluctuations. I am eating about 2200-2300 calories as well. If I use BMR + activity level being moderate, I should be eating something like 1600 for maintenance, so 2200 is quite a bit more. This is really frustrating....... feel like I can't get it right.

1600 seems really low for maintenance. Listen to FBM - she knows her stuff!

[dreahere]

Thanks, ladies I know taking those pictures was a Bad Idea, but I've been feeling so muscular, rather than fat, from the bulking that I thought I'd be okay with them. After my freak out yesterday, I did okay, though. Ate all my calories and didn't give into the fleeting urge to do double cardio. Happy Mother's Day, everyone.

[andrerox80]

need to increase cals. my head just doesn't consistently accept the bulk, and i have this obsession w/ sameness and it's hard. did manage 50 extra cals yesterday. not enough, i know, but even that was hard.

[freebirdmac]

Yesterday as I was trying to find a dressy outfit to wear this weekend, I came to an obvious conclusion that I need to lose a bit more than the 5 out of 13 pounds I gained. Let's just say thigh high stockings and pantyhose looked like a sausage stuffing fest But you know what? It's ok. The muscle I did gain during this last bulk was more than in the past. It was well worth it!!! I'm just doing a slow, 0.5 pound a week loss. Four pounds came off easily. Another 3 or so won't be bad. So it's not a big deal! Fat is so much easier to lose than it is to gain muscle. No doubt I'll do the same thing in the fall over another long bulk.

So stop the worrying! Eat and gain! Be disappointed if the scale isn't moving up, if the clothes aren't getting tighter, if your lifts aren't going up. Don't hold yourself back!

[take.it.off]

i dont want to say how sad or even sorry because it doesnt seem like him being in your life was a positive thing so congrats on making a decision to better your life even more good luck with thebulk and i like your thoughts on how you look not fat or chunky but full thats how i feel about myself too

Thanks Julysray, It was a good decision.
I haven't weighed myself yet, but I'm assuming I've put on a lot more fat than I wanted to initially (because of my recent vacation). However, when I got to the bottom end of my cut, I felt like I looked sickly...so I'm kind of liking the extra bit of fat...and the muscle that has come with it so far! The only downside is some of the tight shirts, but it's temporary, so I'm just thinking forward about how awesome I will look and feel when I'm done the build.

Plus, now that I've got my numbers in check - since I'm back home - I know the fat gains will slow. Yippie!

[andrerox80]

freebird, what's your cal diff b/w your bulk and current cutting? how much above maintenance before and how much below now? just curious.

and i just wanna say again that you have the best freakin' attitude.

[freebirdmac]

freebird, what's your cal diff b/w your bulk and current cutting? how much above maintenance before and how much below now? just curious.

and i just wanna say again that you have the best freakin' attitude.

I was 250 above maintenance for the bulk, and am at 250 below maintenance for leaning out. Or thereabouts I don't track. Sanity checks every now and then verify what I was/am trying to do. Mostly I'd go by the scale, measurements, and progress in the gym.

Don't worry, practice makes this so much easier

[mausi79]

From your stats it's clear you need to gain muscle mass. Losing fat will not get you looking better. Just smaller. Yes you will gain additional fat doing this, but it should not be huge amounts! Nor should you look 4 or 5 months pregnant. Those symptoms sound like a food sensitivity. Dairy and gluten being the prime suspects. Possibly soy as well. So yes, get the cals up, maybe move to a different diet and eliminate the usual tummy problem suspects, and hit the weights hard.

I've come to officially join over here on the bulking thread although my head is still having a hard time accepting it. It just seems so strange that this is what i have to do even though i can already pinch 2 inches on my belly and love handles. Sorry but i am definitely going to need a lot of reassurance!

Oh and i added 2 photos! wanted to take more but my camera died so i'll have to attempt it tomorrow again

As for my belly swelling well its been going on for almost 3 years. I'm in pain in my lower abdomen daily. I've taken so much out of my diet that theres not much left. With my celiac test coming back neg it was nice to enjoy a piece of ezekial bread although a sensitivity won't come up like an allergy so i'm still not 100% sure. Seen plenty of dr's but with state insurance pickins are slim. Fortunately i found some good ones in the past month so between them both (gastro and allergy) they can hopefully figure it out.

[Barefoot_Zosia]

Okay ladies, I'm finally going to take the plunge and start bulking!

I'm tired of busting ass day after day and seeing little to no improvement. I'm fed up with feeling more and more worn out instead of stronger and stronger. I'm sick of letting an irrational fear of bodyfat and a belief that eating at a caloric surplus is "wrong" prevent me from achieving my strength goals. From here on out, I WILL cut back on cardio and I WILL keep lifting heavy and I WILL start eating to support my training! (Now hold me to that, please -- my slightly neurotic self is gonna need some help along the way. )

Here's the basic game plan:

~ 2000-2250 kcals EVERY day, even rest days (I've been more in the 1800-2000 range, and sometimes less on rest days. Based on the Calculating Macros sticky, my maintenance is about 1800.)
~ lift 4x per week (This will usually be an upper/lower split, 5x5-ish program of primarily compound lifts.)
~ cardio 4x per week MAX (This will probably be two 30-min and two 45-min jogging/elliptical sessions to start. I may cut back more over time. I'll also work on changing my mindset about low-key activity like walking not being "enough.")
~ 1-2 rest days (i.e. normal daily activity ONLY... no sneaking in moderate-intensity exercise like walking, yoga, dance, etc. and pretending it doesn't count)

Seem reasonable? Any suggestions? I bow to your collective bulking wisdom...

[dawndm]

I've come to officially join over here on the bulking thread although my head is still having a hard time accepting it. It just seems so strange that this is what i have to do even though i can already pinch 2 inches on my belly and love handles. Sorry but i am definitely going to need a lot of reassurance!

Oh and i added 2 photos! wanted to take more but my camera died so i'll have to attempt it tomorrow again

As for my belly swelling well its been going on for almost 3 years. I'm in pain in my lower abdomen daily. I've taken so much out of my diet that theres not much left. With my celiac test coming back neg it was nice to enjoy a piece of ezekial bread although a sensitivity won't come up like an allergy so i'm still not 100% sure. Seen plenty of dr's but with state insurance pickins are slim. Fortunately i found some good ones in the past month so between them both (gastro and allergy) they can hopefully figure it out.

I think you look great...the perfect base for adding some nice mass. You'll look amazing after a bulk.

Good luck.

[mausi79]

I think you look great...the perfect base for adding some nice mass. You'll look amazing after a bulk.

Good luck.

Thanks So even though i upped my cals to so far 1800 (i know its still too low but i'm working on it) This morning my weight was 116.6? it went down? I was for sure i would be 118 with how i'm so bloated and look like a stuffed turkey by days end.

[andrerox80]

Any suggestions?

more cals, less cardio. and welcome

[mausi79]

need to increase cals. my head just doesn't consistently accept the bulk, and i have this obsession w/ sameness and it's hard. did manage 50 extra cals yesterday. not enough, i know, but even that was hard.

I am having the same problem so We're supposed to eat the same amount on an off day too?