Mature miscers who have their chit together get in here and share your wisdom pls

[turokturok5]

Hey misc, I'm sitting here having just been dumped on Christmas by my girlfriend of 3 years. She was what the misc would call a unicorn and I done fked up. I have no resentment towards her, she was at a stage in her life where she wanted to be married with kids and wanted a mature relationship. I've only just started my career 6 months ago at 27 years of age and am still living at home with my parents, so fair play to her.

I realized after the breakup that I've neglected my self development and want to start making some big changes. I'm only employed as a casual working full time in a hospital so I have no job security but have racked up 40k (AUD) in savings. I want to move out of home ASAP to start living independently and am thinking of renting an apartment in the city but am not sure if this is a good idea given the lack of job security, but would be able to afford if I ran out of work during a 6 month lease.

People who have their chit together already, please share some inspiring stories, tips/hints for self-improvement, podcasts, books and what not to help a brother find his way. I use to be in good shape but stopped going to the gym after starting work (long work hours + having to study at home) so my first step has been to start my creatine loading again and hit the weights. Thank you

cliffs; how to git gud at life

[TryingBB]

Why did she dump you? An event? Or something you or she did?

As in - what story she gave you during the “talk”?

[turokturok5]

Why did she dump you? An event? Or something you or she did?

As in - what story she gave you during the “talk”?

I called her out, said she had been very distant in the last few weeks and wanted to know what was up.

I'm 27, she had just turned 30 and felt like her biological clock was ticking too quickly to wait for me to be able to establish my career and have some financial security before making any serious commitments

[BDSMBBW]

I called her out, said she had been very distant in the last few weeks and wanted to know what was up.

I'm 27, she had just turned 30 and felt like her biological clock was ticking too quickly to wait for me to be able to establish my career and have some financial security before making any serious commitments

> 30 / F
> Unicorn

LOL

[Schnitzl]

I called her out, said she had been very distant in the last few weeks and wanted to know what was up.

I'm 27, she had just turned 30 and felt like her biological clock was ticking too quickly to wait for me to be able to establish my career and have some financial security before making any serious commitments

Bro your life is just starting. For the next 3 years don't even think about a relationship. Get a good job with lots of vacation days, when the world opens up have enough saved so you can go to Europe for a month to enjoy life, go to SEA and sloot around a month or two, make sure you deduct 20% of your take home salary and throw it in big stocks or if you want to be risky, divide the 20% into four and throw 5% in each future energy stock like EV-s, Solar, Wind, Hydro. Hit the fooken gym like your life depended on it. I'm talking 7 days a week rain or sunshine. Go to the gym first thing in the morning before work so you have 0 excuses in being too tired after work.

Slay poontang and don't fall into the trap of relationship right away again. Your new life just started, take it all in.

Edit: Also start reading books or watching documentaries. Add something that will keep your brain active and learning more every day. Your social skills matter especially when you're out with friends or in a dirty Vietnamese hostel on dat dere Pho Cuon time spreadin some bahn mi nomsayin?

[aleeboy]

Just read my threads, OP.

Cheers

[EasternHammer]

The first step will be to invest heavily in self-improvement. I won't touch much on that since several other folks mentioned it above. When it comes to finding the next girl, I want to share two ideas that I did not truly comprehend until I was even older than you are now. Goes like this.

#1-Passion vs compatibility. In other words, get to realize the difference between people we WANT to be with, and people we SHOULD be with. Most of us bros with any years under our belts have had relationships with women who fit just one of these criteria, but the trick is that relationships which last must have both. It's very possible to have outstanding passion and physical desire and yes even love for someone who doesn't share your values and beliefs. These relationships usually end spectacularly badly, but they stick in your memory for a long time. Some of us spend our whole lives chasing the kind of rush these pairings bring.

On the other hand, it's very possible to find someone who is easy to be with and with similar values who just doesn't excite us in our deepest soul. These relationships can carry on for decades but neither party will be fulfilled. Either you or her will notice what's missing and a downward spiral begins. It doesn't so much die as live on terminally sick. I would suggest that whenever you're in an LTR with a girl, give it six months and then ask yourself very seriously if this situation has both the passion and compatibility to go the distance. You must be honest with yourself and I believe you will make the right decision.

#2-Synergy. Being with the right girl, the truly right girl for you, makes life easier, not harder. And you will make her life better as well. I imagine you remember math class, right? 2+2=4, right? When you meet her-not just any girl, but HER-you will find that 2+2 starts to equal 7. Both of you will be inspired to attempt achievements you would not have considered previously, and you will succeed. Everything starts to feel possible and victory always seems to be within reach. This is what I call synergy. Sometimes couples don't have any synergy-2+2 just equals 4. This is doable but not ideal. And sometimes couples can have negative synergy and 2+2=1 lol. These are the obviously mismatched couples who never agree on anything and actually seem to be holding each other back, or possibly a couple where no one ever wants to rock the boat and push for any change. Ask yourself whether your partner makes life easier, or harder. There is your synergy.

Hope this helps.

[Evil_D]

Hey misc, I'm sitting here having just been dumped on Christmas by my girlfriend of 3 years. She was what the misc would call a unicorn and I done fked up. I have no resentment towards her, she was at a stage in her life where she wanted to be married with kids and wanted a mature relationship. I've only just started my career 6 months ago at 27 years of age and am still living at home with my parents, so fair play to her.

I realized after the breakup that I've neglected my self development and want to start making some big changes. I'm only employed as a casual working full time in a hospital so I have no job security but have racked up 40k (AUD) in savings. I want to move out of home ASAP to start living independently and am thinking of renting an apartment in the city but am not sure if this is a good idea given the lack of job security, but would be able to afford if I ran out of work during a 6 month lease.

People who have their chit together already, please share some inspiring stories, tips/hints for self-improvement, podcasts, books and what not to help a brother find his way. I use to be in good shape but stopped going to the gym after starting work (long work hours + having to study at home) so my first step has been to start my creatine loading again and hit the weights. Thank you

cliffs; how to git gud at life

The only thing I can attribute my success (wife, house, family) to is working hard and a lot.
Serious.
Best of luck.

[mikebadg3]

Forget all about them and stop coping