I was told to post this in here so more lulz can be had.
I suck. A guy I work with invited me to his house on July 4. He said "Ok I've got a whore coming out for ya 3 drinks she will f."
So what happens?
She drinks some, I drink more than usual, we talk, she won't sit on my lap in the hot tub, I pass out in the yard, and later find out that she was on her hands and knees above me with a penor in both ends.
I don't know how I fail so miserably. I must be female repellant.
Now she wants to friend me on facebook. WTF??