College girl dealing with gym shyness

[Callie7]

So my college has an on-campus gym with essentially two separate weight rooms. One room has all the elliptical machines, weight machines, and a dumbbell rack with dumbbells from 2-12 pounds. The other room is the free weight room.

I'm a 5'3" 165 lb extremely out of shape girl, and I've been using the dumbbells in the machine room for the most part, but now I need heavier weights but I'm terrified of going into the free weight room.

Why? There's always 10~20 guys in there, never any girls, and they're all really fit athlete types. My college is very "attractive" (most people are athletic and come from upperclass families so they dress well) and these guys seem really intimidating. And I'm an overweight girl so I feel like I'd be so out of place.

Any words of encouragement or advice? I really don't know how to beat this...

[mariplay2004]

So my college has an on-campus gym with essentially two separate weight rooms. One room has all the elliptical machines, weight machines, and a dumbbell rack with dumbbells from 2-12 pounds. The other room is the free weight room.

I'm a 5'3" 165 lb extremely out of shape girl, and I've been using the dumbbells in the machine room for the most part, but now I need heavier weights but I'm terrified of going into the free weight room.

Why? There's always 10~20 guys in there, never any girls, and they're all really fit athlete types. My college is very "attractive" (most people are athletic and come from upperclass families so they dress well) and these guys seem really intimidating. And I'm an overweight girl so I feel like I'd be so out of place.

Any words of encouragement or advice? I really don't know how to beat this...

ok ..so my advice for you is to just go in there ..and if you know what your doing then .it doesnt matter ..just as long as you know what you're doing .

walk with confidence ..and carry a smile ...just don't talk to anyone unless someone talks to you (I have my ipod on ..so that way no one apporaches me )

try it ..
and good luck

[SportyShorty89]

I am an athletic college girl, always in the gym, even more often and more intense than is required by our coach. I'd have to say the one thing I hate to see in the gym are girls who come in and putz around once or twice then I never see them again. My favorite sight of all time is seeing a new girl (overweight or not) come in and kill it every time, and continue seeing them throughout the weeks. I'm usually in my own little world but I will take a peek around and give a little smile and *hey* nod to those girls. *Get it gurrl* hah.

So do your research, go in there, and work hard. It's only going to make you stronger mentally and physically. If the guys are athletes then they should be intense in their workouts and could care less if you are there. If they are haters...then you can just shove it in their face when your a hott babe struttin around the gym.

The only thing you can do is DO IT

[folkprophet]

When I see a girl working out without 'girl' weights I'm impressed. If she (or even a guy) is a bit out of shape I think, "Good for you. Rock on!"

Don't be intimidated. Anyone who looks down on you for it is an idiot and has been an idiot and always will be an idiot and you don't want them to like you anyway.

[Inertiatic]

Advice from a similarly-aged college guy, don't be intimidated. One thing I do recommend is learning how to do the movements you want to do correctly so you don't look so out of place. Sometimes at my school's gym, I see girls in there flinging around 5 pound dumbbells trying to do curls and it just looks silly because they don't look into it at all and they have no idea what they're doing.

Not that I'm into judging people, but as long as you are confident in yourself and understand how to lift properly, no one will even notice you. In a good way.

[chirppy82]

When I see a girl working out without 'girl' weights I'm impressed. If she (or even a guy) is a bit out of shape I think, "Good for you. Rock on!"

Don't be intimidated. Anyone who looks down on you for it is an idiot and has been an idiot and always will be an idiot and you don't want them to like you anyway.

^^^^this. Most people in a gym are positive people who like to see others succeed. Every gym has a couple of tools who stare and think they are gods gift, but they dont tend to last long and no one takes them seriously anyway. Get in there and do your thing.

Keep charging!!

[StephanieShine]

All of the above is good advice, but I used to shy away from the college gym too. I built up some strength/confidence in the smaller room with the lighter weights and the cardio machines and slowly ventured out into "muscle head" territory. At first I would only go at 7 am when there were only 3 or 4 other guys in there but once I got the hang of it and 'eased' myself into working out with more and more people around it became fine. I actually found out I liked working out in the AM anyways. Also, if you cant go when its not busy, bring a friend, it will distract you from looking at who is looking at you.

[NoPinkDBsPlz]

Go in with a plan. Know what exercises you want to do, and know how to do them. Then just put in your headphones, ignore everyone else, and do it.
If you're unsure, or wondering what to do next, it'll just give you time to overthink.

And remind yourself that you're badass because no other girls at your gym have the balls to do it!

[Crematia]

I train 3 times a week at a college strength training facility and I am a major fat ass. It was very intimidating at first. Everyone else is much younger and in shape and/or an athlete. I still get uneasy when the place is packed. But, you go in there with blinders on, you are there for one reason: to work out. Screw what everyone else thinks. Every single person I have talked to has been nice and helpful. Just get your butt in there and do it.

[Callie7]

Thanks everyone for the amazing help and encouragement. I went tonight and I was extremely nervous and anxious and I rushed my routine and as a result the workout was next to useless. But(!) now that I got the initial shock over with, I think I'll be able to go in and focus next time.

You guys really were a lot of help, and it did feel good knowing I was the only girl brave enough to go in there.

[amaliaeddene]

Don't be scared! The guys are all too busy checking themselves out in the mirror to judge you, and if they anything, they'll be impressed that you're actually braving the weight room. I was totally scared when I first started using my university's gym I was terrified to go in the section with free weights too but I met some really awesome guys that way. It's the girls that I hated to see in that room!

[Maverick777]

True, I am usually more concerned with myself while in the gym unless someone else is next to me using improper form or dropping weights (in which case I am cautious since I don't want them to drop a wt on me)

I also admire any girl that is in the weight room, regardless of how she looks because to me the simple fact that you are there and working on making yourself better is a +1

[ExclusiveStarr]

I had always been intimidated to go into the free weight section of the gym but after the first time I realized that absolutely nobody was looking at me. . . and even if there is someone looking at you just remember you're in there for YOU, not them.

[Flblondie]

Thanks everyone for the amazing help and encouragement. I went tonight and I was extremely nervous and anxious and I rushed my routine and as a result the workout was next to useless. But(!) now that I got the initial shock over with, I think I'll be able to go in and focus next time.

You guys really were a lot of help, and it did feel good knowing I was the only girl brave enough to go in there.

Good for you! Thats awesome. Keep it up and just do your thing. Like the others said, just plan your routine before hand and know what machines you are going to use so you do not feel awkward. I know in the beginning for me, when I was younger if I did not plan it out I would feel stupid and just give up, especially if the machine I wasnted to use was taken, I didnt have a backup.
Now I love being one of the only women in the guys area at my gym. Plus it makes me feel good that I am into a serious workout unlike alot of the other girls. Good luck to you!
Plus...I would rather workout looking at some nice eye candy and you have that, so look on the positive side! LOL

[tgspeedracer]

every guy I know likes to see a girl getting in shape... wait till they start seeing results and give you complements.

Its good to see a bigger girl in the gym, its another thing to see a bigger girl with a donut

[tse]

I'm always the only girl in the weights room/ gym here in France, and am naturally quite shy.

But, the important thing to me is that I'm doing my training, seeing the changes and enjoying myself. I find what really helps me to focus is to take my Ipod and turn it up as loud as possible. I also write down everything I do each week, so I know which weights I need and exactly which machines I need to use. Between sets I note down increases in weights and drink water, so I'm never sitting around doing nothing really.

Just think it's something which is important to you, and actually for the mostpart the response is positive. I go at the same times every week (during the day so it's not too busy) and have started to smile at certain people who I recognise, and on a few occasions people have spotted for me and helped me out if I need it...so they may seem intimidating but I agree with other posters that you'll get a lot of respect for training properly.

[Adelaide.]

Have you thought about getting a work out buddy to go with you until you are more comfortable? I agree with what everyone else has said too. Dive in, do you thing and show the guys that girls can lift too.

[Inertiatic]

Have you thought about getting a work out buddy to go with you until you are more comfortable? I agree with what everyone else has said too. Dive in, do you thing and show the guys that girls can lift too.

Just a word of advice if you bring a friend...

Don't be that pair of girls that run around giggling and being loud and annoying. That's a good way to get you noticed, in a bad way.

[Dertygen]

**** em. (not literally; metaphorically)

I'm in there for myself and so should you.

And think about this; guys are in one of these mindsets in gyms:
1) bustin' ass for themselves and ignoring distractions (including chicks of any attractiveness)
2) bustin' ass but tryin to show off to other guys
3) bustin' ass but trying to show off to guys & girls
4) in there to act like hot shiit and not busting ass
5) in there to act like hot shiit to p/u girls

so really, no guy will be looking down on a chick in a gym... usually just look down on other guys. men just try to impress women usually (except for #1,2).

Now if there's chicks in there... that's when you switch the mindsets gender.

[alero]

Also understand that a lot of those guys are very self conscious too.

[Squirrels]

[QUOTE=Callie7;454866631]Thanks everyone for the amazing help and encouragement. I went tonight and I was extremely nervous and anxious and I rushed my routine and as a result the workout was next to useless. But(!) now that I got the initial shock over with, I think I'll be able to go in and focus next time. [QUOTE]

after a while you probably won't even notice. you'll be so into your workout that you won't care who else is in the room.

[Wolfex]

You go into the gym for you! It's not a social scene. Most people don't really pay attention to others in the gym anyway. Just get in there and move some ****ing iron!

[halcyonnwar]

You go into the gym for you! It's not a social scene. Most people don't really pay attention to others in the gym anyway. Just get in there and move some ****ing iron!

Ditto!

I treat the gym as my private "me-time." Who cares if people stare? Who cares if people think you look out of place? If you're enjoying yourself and your workout people can shove it if you ask me.

I decided a while ago that I was going to act like I thought guys acted in the gym: focus on my workout, don't have negative thoughts about my body--au contraire, be like "wow, I am hot sh*t, check out those triceps... DAYUM!" (or whatever)

That's how I figure guys think when they're in the gym. It makes working out so much more pleasant when you're psyched about your body and what it can do.

So go lift heavy, and kick some ass, reach your goals---don't waste more time being afraid.

[VoxExMachina]

I think lots of people have the same fears that you do. People who are overweight. People who are new to the gym. People who are just starting to learn how to handle free weights. Teenagers. Old Folks. Men. Women.

But as a person with a decent amount of gym experience I'll tell you that people are only paying attention to you about 5% as much as you think they are! Especially if the guys are serious, they are there to get their workouts in, not to give you much more than a casual glance. And even when they do, it's more likely to be approval that you are in there being serious about your fitness than a) sitting around doing nothing or b) spinning your wheels for hours on the treadmills. In any event, you're there for yourself, not the approval of others. So who cares, right?

Just go in there like you own the place. Consider it nothing more than training your mental strength and confidence....which will come in handy when you're lifting heavy stuff off the floor!

Best of luck!

[mariplay2004]

Thanks everyone for the amazing help and encouragement. I went tonight and I was extremely nervous and anxious and I rushed my routine and as a result the workout was next to useless. But(!) now that I got the initial shock over with, I think I'll be able to go in and focus next time.

You guys really were a lot of help, and it did feel good knowing I was the only girl brave enough to go in there.

Yesterday I went to the gym ..as it was my day..and i get there ..I have my routine in mind ..
and i have to go upstairs ..to the "heavier weights " i totally chickened out ( I acted like i was going to walk a lap ...lol)..first of all I don't know most of the equiptment ..and second of all ..it's super packed ..so i decided to have my husband give me a tour of the place ..and i'll tell him the machines that i'm interested in ..he's taking me tomorrow to check them out ..and on the days that I go ..his co-worker goes ..so his co-worker ..can spot me when i need it ..so ..now ..I'll be more confident

=)