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  1. #1
    Banned Orion's Avatar
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    List of copypasta's and meme's

    Misc., help me complete my list:


    I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you are looking for ransom, I can tell you I don't have money. But what I do have are a very particular set of skills; skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you let my daughter go now, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will kill you.

    Are you aware that there are people in this world that have a severe medical condition which causes them to be that way? My mother for instance is one of those people. She is a truck driver that has bad knees and a bad back from driving the truck but you probably do not care about that case either. Oh well I am not one of those people I am 6'4" 245lbs and I exercise every day. I would love to see you say something like that to my mother in front of me. Probably never happen though you are probably just an internet tough guy. I doubt very seriously you would say that to someones face. Just my thought. What do you think. Oh I am sorry you probably do not have a brain. I on the other hand will be happy to buy you a plane ticket to come here and see if you have the nerve to say that to someone I know.



    Whenever I get a package of plain M&Ms, I make it my duty to continue the
    strength and robustness of the candy as a species. To this end, I hold
    M&M duels.

    Taking two candies between my thumb and forefinger, I apply pressure,
    squeezing them together until one of them cracks and splinters. That is
    the "loser," and I eat the inferior one immediately. The winner gets to
    go another round.

    I have found that, in general, the brown and red M&Ms are tougher, and
    the newer blue ones are genetically inferior. I have hypothesized that
    the blue M&Ms as a race cannot survive long in the intense theatre of
    competition that is the modern candy and snack-food world.

    Occasionally I will get a mutation, a candy that is misshapen, or
    pointier, or flatter than the rest. Almost invariably this proves to be
    a weakness, but on very rare occasions it gives the candy extra strength.
    In this way, the species continues to adapt to its environment.

    When I reach the end of the pack, I am left with one M&M, the strongest
    of the herd. Since it would make no sense to eat this one as well, I pack
    it neatly in an envelope and send it to M&M Mars, A Division of Mars,
    Inc., Hackettstown, NJ 17840-1503 U.S.A., along with a 3x5 card reading,
    "Please use this M&M for breeding purposes."

    This week they wrote back to thank me, and sent me a coupon for a free
    1/2 pound bag of plain M&Ms. I consider this "grant money." I have set
    aside the weekend for a grand tournament. From a field of hundreds, we
    will discover the True Champion.

    There can be only one.


    When a couple of guys Who were up to no good Started making trouble in my neighborhood I got in one little fight and my mom got scared She said 'You're movin' with your auntie and uncle in Bel Air'

    The details of my life are quite inconsequential... very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds- pretty standard really. At the age of twelve I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking- I highly suggest you try it.

    The problem is your focusing on the things in life that don't really matter. When I was a kid I had hopes and dreams. We all did. But over time, the daily grind gets in the way and you miss the things that really matter, even though they are right in front of you, staring you in the face. I think the next time you should ask yourself "Am I on the right track here?". I don't mean to be rude but people like you I really pity. So maybe you could use the few brain cells you have and take advantage of the knowledge I have given you now. Good luck.

    I have relatives from not so far back that were Nimibian tribesman. They happen to have fought lions just to become warriors. I don't know what you know about lions but they aren't like your average cat. I bet you would absolutely **** yourself if you ever saw a real life lion, especially if you were only holding a sharpened stick and you were naked. Come talk to me when some of your family members have gone on the Zambutu bibjano; A.K.A. the trial of life. Until you have done half the **** that they have maybe you shouldn't even talk to me like this. I know you think you're hard and **** but guess what pal, you aren't. Now go grow some Namibian genes and we'll talk about this **** for real.

    First person: I had Reese's for breakfast. Second person: Reese's? For breakfast?! First person: It's Reese's... for breakfast!

    And between you and me, something amazing happened... and now I can talk to animals! It's really cool, but totally secret. And you know what? Life's never been the same.

    Hello heavenly blessed beauty whose inner beauty and beauty is simply divine and everlasting

    Wow, strong arms.

    Come at me bro.

    Son, I am dissappoint.

    I'm 12 and what is this?

    My mind is blown!

    Good Job Dave Man

    Fap Fap Fap

    It's over 9,000!

    Good night, sweet prince.

    I am mother ****er!

    Call the ambahlamps.

    I bertstared.

    Brian Peppers, Dave Man, Leeroy Jenkins, Percey
    Last edited by Orion; 02-20-2010 at 12:18 AM.
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  2. #2
    Registered User matt3989's Avatar
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    haha it sounds kind of gay, but I'm starting to fear my own strength. I've been getting stronger and stronger every time I hit the gym, that now I have to use those heavy ass dumbells no one uses, and alot of 45 pound plates on all my barbell workouts. I dont have a gym partner so its kind of intimidating to do certain workouts alone with such heavy iron. Anyone have this little phobia? lol it wont stop me, but I'm getting really big into stretching cause the fear of injury from these workouts. It's kind of scary, lol.
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  3. #3
    Fighting the Brotology. VegasPumped's Avatar
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    loll
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  4. #4
    I can confirm I am title ShayZ's Avatar
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    Strong Join Date to Post Ratio
    RIP mainsqueeze530

    y u leave us so early bro?
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  5. #5
    Banned Sephiroth.'s Avatar
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    yo op u ugly as fuk cuzz
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  6. #6
    NJ crew. yo. gta95's Avatar
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    Get back in the pool phaggots
    **New Jersey Crew 609**
    -Night Miscers Crew-
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    Arsenal FC

    Nas = G.O.A.T.
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  7. #7
    Aquafinga Poland Sprung's Avatar
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    oh heavenly blessed beauty bout tree fiddy at what cost but who was phone?
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  8. #8
    Registered User TheRejuvenated's Avatar
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    Im 17 and im just now hitting puberty, you want to say that in 3 years when im big enough to beat you up

    Yes I'm really gonna believe that it's the end of the world because the calendar designed by a bunch of retarded south americans who were absorbed in ripping out organs and offering them as sacrifice to a snake feathered god with no penis is about to expire

    Yo what the **** man , I'm getting tired of this ****, seriously ....WTF is with you guys and smelling girls' asses , smelling their feet , chewing their panties and all that other ****...are you miscers THAT sexually deprived that you think you need to get a piece of every part of a chick....would I want a chick sniffing my anus...no SO WHY THE **** do you guys do that ****....I cant get it man ..some if the **** posted here is ****ing gross..like this ****ing thread..sniffing unclean asses

    ****ing gross brah. Why would you put your dick in the same hole that your dad does? I wouldn't even be able to do that **** cuz I'd be thinking of my pops doing it to her.
    PLUS, that is ****ed up. Your ****ing dad feeds you and puts a roof over your head your whole life and you repay him by ****ing his wife??? **** that **** I'd rather die than disrespect my dad like that

    This is not funny when I was 12 I had my first sexual experience. At the time, I lived in a little suburb outside of Cleveland and anyway, the girl next door and I were really good friends. Our parents were both gone for the day and she was over playing Transformers with me. So anyway, we kinda got.. Bored I guess? And we started playing truth or dare, which turned into 'you show me yours, I'll show you mine". So anyway there I Was, 12 years old, heart pounding, blood rushing in my ears, and the chick (who was a year older than me actually) takes off her panties and hikes her little skirt up. So What did I do, you ask? I whistled for a cab, and when it came near, the license plate said "fresh" and there were dice in the mirror. If anything I could say that this cab was rare, but I thought "naw forget it, yo home to bel-air!" I pulled up to the house about seven or eight and I yelled to the cabbie "yo homes smell ya later!" Looked at my kingdom, I was finally there. To settle my throne as the prince of bel-air.


    delta ecko charly this is zulu foxcott the goose on lake, i repeat goose on lake what is ur status over

    Alpha sigma sigma to your foxtrot alpha charlie echo
    - Chicago Cubs - Indianapolis Colts - Phoenix Suns - Nebraska Cornhuskers -

    "From the errors of others, a wise man corrects his own."
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    "The greater a man is in power above others, the more he ought to excel them in virtue. None ought to govern who is not better than the governed."
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  9. #9
    Banned Orion's Avatar
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    Any other one's?
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  10. #10
    Jimmies Rustled ☑ Cpt.Insano's Avatar
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    I have nothing to say. I just wanna eat my cake.
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  11. #11
    Touch my vagiba tarheelblue0378's Avatar
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    anyone got the "day after olympia" one?
    ★ ☆ ★ DURTY SOUF CRUE ★ ☆ ★ NC CHAPTER ★ ☆ ★
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    "I think we would all be better off if we had chosen a dog and a fleshlight for companionship." Bando Calrissian

    I stand firm in my solidarity. The path I walk, I walk it with my own resolve

    "No. He wasn't alright. He set his genitals on fire."
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  12. #12
    Registered User jassako's Avatar
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    The details of my life are quite inconsequential... very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds- pretty standard really. At the age of twelve I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking- I highly suggest you try it.



    Are you aware that there aren't enough words in the english language- hell, the entire lexicon of languages the world over- to describe how incredibly wrong this is. Not only is it wrong in that it is ignorant, but in that it is so incredibly incorrect on a factual level. Holy ****ing God, how stupid can a human being get? In my life I've encountered people who have been unintelligent, yes- I've encountered my share of people who suffered from mental disabilities. People with downs syndrome, autism, and so on. However, I have never once encounted somehow so stupid as to be capable of thinking something so unbelievably off-base. I didn't even think it possible that anyone in our plain of existence could ever even have the capacity for this level of idiocy



    I have relatives from not so far back that were nimibian tribesman. they happen to have fought lions just to become warriors. I dont know what you know about lions but they aren't like your average cat. I bet you would absolutely **** yourself if you ever saw a real life lion.. especially if you were only holding a sharpened stick and you were naked. come talk to me when some of your family members have gone on the zambutu bibjano; aka the trial of life. until you have done half the **** that they have maybe you shouldnt even talk to me like this. I know you think you're hard and **** but guess what pal.. u arent'. now go grow some namibian genes and we'll talk about this **** for real
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  13. #13
    Banned Orion's Avatar
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    I added some.
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  14. #14
    Banned Orion's Avatar
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    I added some more.
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  15. #15
    Banned sapphire's Avatar
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    sapphire is a jewel in the rough. (+500) sapphire is a jewel in the rough. (+500) sapphire is a jewel in the rough. (+500) sapphire is a jewel in the rough. (+500) sapphire is a jewel in the rough. (+500) sapphire is a jewel in the rough. (+500) sapphire is a jewel in the rough. (+500)
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  16. #16
    Banned Doubletree's Avatar
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    Anyone got the one where it is a guy talking trash and he says "I'll fukk your sister in the pink and get your daddy to fix my sink" and ends with "my pec just twitched lmao"

    Holy crap did I laugh at it. Reps for whoever posts it.
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  17. #17
    Ballin' 24/7 xk5's Avatar
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    Im 18, do i have potential??
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  18. #18
    Registered User nickk's Avatar
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    I check into small hotel a few kilometers from Kiev. It is late. I am tired. I tell woman at desk I want a room. She tells me room number and give key. “But one more thing comrade; there is one room without number and always lock. Don’t even peek in there.” I take key and go to room to sleep.

    Night comes and I hear trickling of water. It comes from the room across. I cannot sleep so I open door. It is coming from room with no number. I pound on door. No response. I look in keyhole. I see nothing except red.

    Water still trickling. I go down to front desk to complain. “By the way who is in that room?” She look at me and begin to tell story.

    There was woman in there. Murdered by her husband. Skin all white, except her eyes, which were red.

    I tell her I don’t give a shit. Stop the water trickling or give me refund. She gave me 100 ruble credit and free breakfast.
    Such is life in Moscow
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  19. #19
    Rutgers 2013 .Locus's Avatar
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    lol @ banned
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  20. #20
    Registered User JM3K's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by locuspoint View Post
    lol @ banned
    lol why
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  21. #21
    Registered User Concrete0083's Avatar
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    first 2002 join date i've ever seen.
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  22. #22
    Registered User mathsdebate's Avatar
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    Strong join date to post to ban ratio
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  23. #23
    Cigar Crew Secretary Shaun113's Avatar
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  24. #24
    Registered User AussieTrapezius's Avatar
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    I made the bert stared I even have a rep about it.

    now gimme 3 fiddy
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  25. #25
    School/Work/Lift askem's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by mathsdebate View Post
    Strong join date to post to ban ratio
    lmaoo













    why OP bant?
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  26. #26
    Registered User jassako's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by nickk View Post
    I check into small hotel a few kilometers from Kiev. It is late. I am tired. I tell woman at desk I want a room. She tells me room number and give key. ?But one more thing comrade; there is one room without number and always lock. Don?t even peek in there.? I take key and go to room to sleep.

    Night comes and I hear trickling of water. It comes from the room across. I cannot sleep so I open door. It is coming from room with no number. I pound on door. No response. I look in keyhole. I see nothing except red.

    Water still trickling. I go down to front desk to complain. ?By the way who is in that room?? She look at me and begin to tell story.

    There was woman in there. Murdered by her husband. Skin all white, except her eyes, which were red.

    I tell her I don?t give a shit. Stop the water trickling or give me refund. She gave me 100 ruble credit and free breakfast.
    Such is life in Moscow
    ROFLL where is this gem from?
    + 92B +
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  27. #27
    Waist is not chopped. RC2008's Avatar
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    In b4 Cell tech ass injection

    In b4 Morning after olympia
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  28. #28
    Registered User The Main Event's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Concrete0083 View Post
    first 2002 join date i've ever seen.
    sup brah
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  29. #29
    Registered User nickk's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by jassako View Post
    ROFLL where is this gem from?
    its a parody of this story:

    A man went to a hotel and walked up to the front desk to check in. The woman at the desk gave him his key and told him that on the way to his room, there was a door with no number that was locked and no one was allowed in there. Especially no one should look inside the room, under any circumstances. So he followed the instructions of the woman at the front desk, going straight to his room, and going to bed.

    The next night his curiosity would not leave him alone about the room with no number on the door. He walked down the hall to the door and tried the handle. Sure enough it was locked. He bent down and looked through the wide keyhole. Cold air passed through it, chilling his eye. What he saw was a hotel bedroom, like his, and in the corner was a woman whose skin was completely white. She was leaning her head against the wall, facing away from the door. He stared in confusion for a while. He almost knocked on the door, out of curiosity, but decided not to.

    This disinclination saved his life. He crept away from the door and walked back to his room. The next day, he returned to the door and looked through the wide keyhole. This time, all he saw was redness. He couldn't make anything out besides a distinct red color, unmoving. Perhaps the inhabitants of the room knew he was spying the night before, and had blocked the keyhole with something red.

    At this point he decided to consult the woman at the front desk for more information. She sighed and said, "Did you look through the keyhole?" The man told her that he had and she said, "Well, I might as well tell you the story. A long time ago, a man murdered his wife in that room, and her ghost haunts it. But these people were not ordinary. They were white all over, except for their eyes, which were red."
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  30. #30
    Registered User Concrete0083's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by The Main Event View Post
    sup brah
    Fuuuu
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