Unfit spouse/partner?

[notgumbel]

For any of you in this situation, advice appreciated ...

How do you respond to a potential client who says:

"[insert name of your spouse/partner/bf/gf here] isn't in good shape. Why should I listen to you?"

Is there a good way to handle this objection, returning the focus back to the potential client?

[Emoore]

He doesn't listen to me, and he's not in good shape. Now, do you want to listen to me?

[Lasharm]

You can do one of the following, all are acceptable...

1: Go "Chivalrous" and Smack them over the side of the head for insulting your partner, and demand satisfaction. You won't get a new client, but it defiantly will score you points with your significant other...

2: Avoid the problem by getting your significant other in shape... or at least healthy...

3: Avoid the problem by not having clients meet your partner if they are unhealthy. In other words, hide them; though, this may get you put in the doghouse...

4: If your significant other has a legitimate excuse for being unhealthy (true medical problem, not an "I luv McD's Fries!" problem) then you can tell the potential client that and that they are doing the best they can. If the client can't accept that, then tell them to shove off because they will be more trouble than what they are worth.

Personally, I would go with number 2.

[Keltron]

how do your clients know that your SO is out of shape?

[trance__dreamer]

hmm...interesting question. the guy i'm seeing isn't in all that great shape internally. =/ physically, he's ehh...as well. (but i still find him sexy as hell, though!! & his body is exactlyyy the type i love - i'm not sexually attracted to severe muscle separation/extreme leanness. to each their own; right?) but yea. i'd say to my client "my significant other is NOT me; i.e.: he's NOT your trainer. IIIII am. they're just my partner." we have COMPLETELY different lifestyles. but that doesn't take away from the fact that we're still compatible on different levels, which is why i still want to be with him. & that won't be affecting your results. <--- the bottom line. i don't like pushing my lifestyle on other pple. i find it annoying, rude, & disrespectful when religious pple do that to me. so, i won't be pushing jack shti on my partner.

[nitrotxtt]

Originally Posted by notgumbel

For any of you in this situation, advice appreciated ...

How do you respond to a potential client who says:

"[insert name of your spouse/partner/bf/gf here] isn't in good shape. Why should I listen to you?"

Is there a good way to handle this objection, returning the focus back to the potential client?

Interesting question. Never had to deal with that in the past, but I would handle it by saying one of the following:

1. That's why she's dating me. Check back in 2 months.
2. We broke up.
3. I try not to bring my work home with me
4. I don't want to make my clients feel insecure
5. I like a challenge
6. I'm not physically attracted to in shape women. Not sure if you want to take the chance in finding out if other men feel the same.
7. She's not really my gf. I just help her out and let her say she dates me.

Some levity for a Saturday night. Everyone have a good rest of the weekend!

[KyleAaron]

There are two possibilities here.

First, your SO is "out of shape" in terms of appearance, but is actually fit, strong, flexible and healthy. You then reply, "Don't judge a book by its cover, s/he can outlift, outrun and outlive you as you are today."

Second, your SO is "out of shape" in terms of appearance, and is also unfit, weak, stiff and unhealthy. You then reply, "Our code of ethics says we shouldn't get into intimate relationships with people we train; by the same token, we shouldn't train people we're already in intimate relationships with. Be honest: if you told your husband/wife exactly what to eat and what exercise to do, would they listen? Do you think criticising your husband/wife's physique and health would be good for your relationship?"

The other thing you can say is, "Rather than talking about why other people are out of shape, let's talk about why you're out of shape." But that is unlikely to win you that person as a client.

On the other hand, when they open up with something as hostile as criticising the appearance of a person you love, you probably will never have them as a client anyway. This is the route I'd take. You slap them down, and then they're too scared to say such an offensive thing to their next PT.

[Brad777]

because you have the motivation and determination, he/she does not.

[jando]

whoa this is honestly some of the worst advice i've ever seen.

Just say that losing weight is a challenge and if you significant other used your help theyd be happier, healthier and in a better position. keep it simple

but I dont know how as trainer any of us would have a partner that was out of shape i dont necessarily mean in shape but i cant picture dating a chubby girl.

[Brad777]

Originally Posted by jando

whoa this is honestly some of the worst advice i've ever seen.

Just say that losing weight is a challenge and if you significant other used your help theyd be happier, healthier and in a better position. keep it simple

but I dont know how as trainer any of us would have a partner that was out of shape i dont necessarily mean in shape but i cant picture dating a chubby girl.

I could see someone really into working out dating a chubby girl, if they think they can change them. Although it is wrong to go into a relationship thinking she could be real pretty if she just lost 30 pounds. Even if she went with it it probably wont stay off or happen quickly enough and most likely you'll offend her.

[1972girl]

Originally Posted by notgumbel

For any of you in this situation, advice appreciated ...

How do you respond to a potential client who says:

"[insert name of your spouse/partner/bf/gf here] isn't in good shape. Why should I listen to you?"

Is there a good way to handle this objection, returning the focus back to the potential client?

Im not a trainer but anyone who would say that is kind of an a$$ and a potential pain in the butt. Maybe you should just say, {name of S.O} is my partner not my client and when he/she is ready to make some changes I will be there to help. Anyone who judges your work on how your partner looks and not your other clients might be more of a pain than anything.

[nitrotxtt]

Originally Posted by 1972girl

Im not a trainer but anyone who would say that is kind of an a$$ and a potential pain in the butt. Maybe you should just say, {name of S.O} is my partner not my client and when he/she is ready to make some changes I will be there to help. Anyone who judges your work on how your partner looks and not your other clients might be more of a pain than anything.

Well said.

[sargefit]

Originally Posted by KyleAaron

There are two possibilities here.

First, your SO is "out of shape" in terms of appearance, but is actually fit, strong, flexible and healthy. You then reply, "Don't judge a book by its cover, s/he can outlift, outrun and outlive you as you are today."

My missus has a genuine medical problem and is obese. I have had clients half her age who have mentioned this so I bring her to the next session. She wipes the floor with them - ha ha. They soon get the message.

[notgumbel]

Originally Posted by Keltron

how do your clients know that your SO is out of shape?

Some of the referrals I've gotten are from her workplace. While they know the type of progress I've made personally over the past two years, they also know her eating habits and have seen her weight gain.

Quick aside: For my SFN exam, I did an evaluation of a coworker and set up a program for him. He's a constant and almost legendary snacker, and also very enthusiastic. That makes it a no-lose for anyone he refers: if he does well, then I'm seen as a miracle worker ... if he fails, he's seen as a lost cause, and what hope did I ever have with him

Originally Posted by KyleAaron

Second, your SO is "out of shape" in terms of appearance, and is also unfit, weak, stiff and unhealthy.

^^ this

Originally Posted by Emoore

He doesn't listen to me, and he's not in good shape. Now, do you want to listen to me?

^^ truth, but don't want to throw her under the proverbial bus.

Originally Posted by Brad777

I could see someone really into working out dating a chubby girl, if they think they can change them. Although it is wrong to go into a relationship thinking she could be real pretty if she just lost 30 pounds. Even if she went with it it probably wont stay off or happen quickly enough and most likely you'll offend her.

My wife's gorgeous at every weight that I've ever seen her But it breaks my heart that she won't lose weight even at doctor's orders because of great health risk

Originally Posted by 1972girl

Im not a trainer but anyone who would say that is kind of an a$$ and a potential pain in the butt. Maybe you should just say, {name of S.O} is my partner not my client and when he/she is ready to make some changes I will be there to help. Anyone who judges your work on how your partner looks and not your other clients might be more of a pain than anything.

This is a very good way to deflect it -very well worded.

Originally Posted by sargefit

My missus has a genuine medical problem and is obese. I have had clients half her age who have mentioned this so I bring her to the next session. She wipes the floor with them - ha ha. They soon get the message.

Sarge, you rock!!

[loxleynew]

Be nice about it but don't accept them as a client. Honestly if they are that hostile then redirect the question to them. Say why focus on my SO when I am here to help you train?

It's pretty weak for someone to attack your SO. In fact if someone said that to me I'd b$##@ slap them. Seriously.

[jando]

Originally Posted by Brad777

I could see someone really into working out dating a chubby girl, if they think they can change them. Although it is wrong to go into a relationship thinking she could be real pretty if she just lost 30 pounds. Even if she went with it it probably wont stay off or happen quickly enough and most likely you'll offend her.

yea that will work well. You shouldn't date someone with wanting to change them. It's a crappy thing to say but attraction is 1/3 of the relationship.

[notgumbel]

Originally Posted by loxleynew

Be nice about it but don't accept them as a client. Honestly if they are that hostile then redirect the question to them. Say why focus on my SO when I am here to help you train?

It's pretty weak for someone to attack your SO. In fact if someone said that to me I'd b$##@ slap them. Seriously.

For some, I could actually say 'You'd have to LOSE weight to be her size, so what was your point again?'

I could probably spend my whole day overtraining on bitch-slap reps. Actually, when I still worked in the corporate world, most of my day was spent repressing that desire.

[trance__dreamer]

Originally Posted by jando

but I dont know how as trainer any of us would have a partner that was out of shape i dont necessarily mean in shape but i cant picture dating a chubby girl.

truth. but it's weird. i'm just not attracted to separation/ripped/cut. i have no idea why. i should be, as i'm trying to get ripped/cut, myself. but i'm not. i really like the "bulked up" look (hypertrophy hidden a bit by some fluff). i'd also NEVER EVER EVERRR date a skinny/non-muscular guy, no matter how compatible we are. yikes. i'm not attracted to that, either, what.so.ever. to me, that's worse than the ripped/cut look. o__O

Originally Posted by Brad777

I could see someone really into working out dating a chubby girl, if they think they can change them. Although it is wrong to go into a relationship thinking she could be real pretty if she just lost 30 pounds. Even if she went with it it probably wont stay off or happen quickly enough and most likely you'll offend her.

yea. i'm not trying to change jack shti. he's asked for my help. so, i'm going to give it to him. i hope he doesn't take it too far, though. 'cause as i said above, i really like him just the way he is. he can get more muscular, eat healthier, change his lifestyle. but if he leans out, i dunno if i'd be attracted to him physically anymore. =S but if we're so compatible, it shouldn't really matter. so, we'll see what ends up happening. but i don't really need to worry about that any time soon, 'cause he hasn't asked me to officially start helping him out yet. hah. he's stalling. *sigh* ah, well. he'll come around when he's ready, i guess. =) & the slower the change, the more likely that it's gunna stick.

Originally Posted by notgumbel

For some, I could actually say 'You'd have to LOSE weight to be her size, so what was your point again?'

aaaahahaha. truth if your client is obese.

Originally Posted by 1972girl

Anyone who judges your work on how your partner looks and not your other clients might be more of a retard than anything.

fixed. it's incredibly ridiculous to judge a p/t'er by their significant other. if anything is to be judged, it's the p/t'ers physique. that's the person who's helping/being hired. (...should also be judging their KNOWLEDGE as well; obviously more important, as we all know. )