Dad Contacted Me After 22 Years

[B14JOSH]

So I just turned 22 on Monday, and I am on ******** and I notice a new friend request and a new message, apperently from my father that I never met.

Background: My mom and dad were engaged, dad found out my mom was preggo and left her before I was born, never met or heard from him EVER until now.

I was not sure if it was legit, but he sent a LONG message explaining why he never contacted me, among other things. Almost seemed like he was more interested in what my mom was up to, rather than wanting to know about me.

Now he is asking what I want for my birthday, and I am not even sure whato say to the guy. I am not sure if I should give him the benefit of the doubt and start talking to him after 22 years of no contact.

I gave him my address, I guess I will see what happens. What do you guys think?

[ApG]

Not sure what I would do but did you okay it with your mom before giving out your address...the guy might be an imposter.

[aussie_steven]

So I just turned 22 on Monday, and I am on ******** and I notice a new friend request and a new message, apperently from my father that I never met.

Background: My mom and dad were engaged, dad found out my mom was preggo and left her before I was born, never met or heard from him EVER until now.

I was not sure if it was legit, but he sent a LONG message explaining why he never contacted me, among other things. Almost seemed like he was more interested in what my mom was up to, rather than wanting to know about me.

Now he is asking what I want for my birthday, and I am not even sure whato say to the guy. I am not sure if I should give him the benefit of the doubt and start talking to him after 22 years of no contact.

I gave him my address, I guess I will see what happens. What do you guys think?

approach situation with caution, speak to your mum about it too and see what she thinks

[cs21]

He was talking a lot about your mom because thats probably the only way you guys can relate as of now.

Did you have a father figure in your life? If so, ask him what he thinks. As you owe him a lot more than your biodad.

That being said, I think he may be worth meeting. Finding out his medical history is pretty important.

You may have some half brothers/sisters too. If youre an only child, that can be kind of a big deal.

[Augnon]

As someone who never really had parents to begin with.

If he is offering to be some type of father to you.Accept it.I would gladly trade as I have no mother or father.

[hashish]

never met my father... ill be 22 next month....

if he found out a way to contact me... and wanted to meet up or some****...
i would tell him not to let me catch him on the street and dont ever try contact me or my brother again! (srs)

but i dont know what type of person you are and what your feelings are....

[B14JOSH]

He was talking a lot about your mom because thats probably the only way you guys can relate as of now.

Did you have a father figure in your life? If so, ask him what he thinks. As you owe him a lot more than your biodad.

That being said, I think he may be worth meeting. Finding out his medical history is pretty important.

You may have some half brothers/sisters too. If youre an only child, that can be kind of a big deal.

I never really had a father figure, I kinda learned to do things on my own, I was very independent as a child.

I want to find out medical history, and I did find out he has like 6 kids, but I am not sure if I care to meet them or not.

[TheAsianMan]

i think your gonna get rape

[triglyceride]

ask him for 10,000 dollars

[RandomMisc]

Have you told your mom yet? She have anything to say?

[B14JOSH]

Have you told your mom yet? She have anything to say?

I told her today, she says she wants nothing to do with him and if I want to talk to him not to give out any of her info, which I understand and it's fine.

[Fielder]

Talk to your mum before you do anything.

But remember, There are two sides to every story.

[cs21]

I never really had a father figure, I kinda learned to do things on my own, I was very independent as a child.

I want to find out medical history, and I did find out he has like 6 kids, but I am not sure if I care to meet them or not.

Its all up to you. I would personally meet him just to see how it goes.

Decide for yourself if you want to meet him, instead of deciding if you want him to feel like **** for what he did.

and like the poster said above me, you may not know exactly what happened.
You do know that he hasnt made an effort until now though.

[B14JOSH]

He lives in a differnet state, I doubt he will be coming out here, but who knows.

[Onisac]

Why don't you talk about it with your mom first?

[B14JOSH]

Why don't you talk about it with your mom first?

I told her about it today.

So I am kind of curious to know what he will send me.

[Lexodus]

If he's rich/successful...welcome him back with open arms. If he's an angry broke alcoholic drug addict...send him away forever.

[DieselZ]

i would see him

[UkChris93]

lol aware

[B14JOSH]

lol aware

Fail.

[Jburn]

Thats a tough one dude.. but you are grown now. Hes getting old and knows it.

Cant imagine what i would do if this was my situation.. its hard to say really.

I would certainly not want anything to do with him, but knowing that he exists somewhere out there and wants to see me, I would probably meet him.

Even if you just meet him once to see what he looks like, sounds like, etc doesnt mean he gets to have a place in your life.

Hes basically a stranger..

[B14JOSH]

True, I don't need to let him into my life, but if he wants to meet once I think I will do it. For now it seems like he just wants to get back in contact.

[Idontlikeit]

I told her about it today.

So I am kind of curious to know what he will send me.

its a crazy world out there bro.. just make sure its not a bomb or aids, how? i dunno lol

[B14JOSH]

its a crazy world out there bro.. just make sure its not a bomb, how? i dunno lol

I know he's legit, he said things in the message that make me know it's him not some random dude pretending to be my dad.

Plus I have never told ANYONE about my dad, or his real name.

[Uncontested]

Did he pay child support?

[Briangumble]

So what did he say was the reason why he left?

[B14JOSH]

Did he pay child support?

He did for 1-2 years out of my childhood, he ran from it the rest of the time.

So what did he say was the reason why he left?

He hasn't said why he left, but he has apologized and said it was a mistake and wishes he could have been there for me growing up.

My mom says he was a selfish asshat and didn't want to comit to a kid.

[Achilles87]

Tell him you want a bmw

[Rebel24]

Son... I am your father.

[SuperDaddy2000]

I was young and stupid. We all make mistakes. I hope we can work this out.