gf left me, getting thoughts of suicide, yes im a idiot.

[Heaven_is_Here]

so for whoever wants to help here it is.

my gf left me while at work yesterday. I have talked to her here and there in the past 2 days, i have begged for her back n gave her space. but she still doesnt wanna come back home to me.

Her reasons it seems are this, there vague but this is what she gives me, I smoother her to much, I am always needy, which is true.

I dont let her have enough time with friends ( I am not forcefully controlling I sub conciously just say whats on my mind and make her feel bad about not spending enuff time with me and she doesnt go out with her friends).

She needs time to find herself and needs space and maybe in a week we can try n work things out but she doesnt know.

other than that I know her friends n family hate me and i have caughter her talking bad about me alot how jealous i am, which is true, but so is she. her friends n family are talking her out of being with me past few days and to stay at home were its better for her so shes got lots of support right now.

So what do i do? Act like im fine and dandy?

be her friend and be there for her but dont ask for her back just let her know she can come back if she wants

just be a friend

beg for her?

or what.. please help lol, i know i have problems i am a very needy person and have been getting such bad thoughts about life right now cause i feel like i cant breathe without her here sleepin with me.

help...

[Kharig]

http://suicidehotlines.com/

1-800-784-2433

1-800-273-8255

[Patrice_Lumumba]

Only a worthless ******* would an hero over a B!TCH! Just ignore her and move on, see how she misses your attention. You're too young to be stressing over one bish. And I mean look at your display picture, don't be such a cheesy fuk.

[Kharig]

Just stop talking to her, thats it, it's over. you can find better, the pain goes away. just distance yourself for good.

i wrote all of my memories down in a huge ms.doc and after that i could forget about em bc they were on paper.

find another girl, might suck to think about but the sooner you get the rebound the better you feel

[fergman311]

Age: 21
Job:Get over it

I wish I was 21 again...

[fodosho]

Worry about your gyno not some bish... that's beta as hell, Go find another girl who is hotter and better to be around.

[Rawp0wer1O1]

Yes act like you are fine. Act like she means nothing to you. Fake it til you make it. Other women will make you feel 50x better

[Heaven_is_Here]

thanks guys alot of good advice i am feeling better. I want her back real bad. I duno what is wrong with me but i am quite abit of a bitch. I mean i am so needy and cry over a girl, but fck i got her name across my back and was planning on marrying her real soon she had the ring n everything.

thing i know is once i get off the computer or when i wake up tomorrow i am gonna be going crazy again. I know i should probably move on cause if it was true love she wouldnt have left right? Buts its so hard i just wanna get her back cause i atlest feel like it was true love. i just wanna msg and txt her non stop but i know its pushing her even more far away.

I duno what to do i cant think straight

[tbrady12]

love is tough man... i took a pyschology class in college the professor said the best way to get a girl back is to live a happy and full-filling life. it's a game if you ask me.. if you jus go out and have fun with your boys and meet new girls and jus stop texting her. she will want you back! my ex-gf is already texting me and trying to talk. but jus stop texting her! if u do happen to talk to her then jus say sorry it didnt work out, its going to be hard to get over u but in time ill be ok, hope u find the person your looking for and i hope u wish the same great things for me in my life... people only want they cant have girls are no different. but man to think about suicide is stubborn you times your emotions by 10X and put it on everyone u know cuz they just lost u in their life....think about it..hope this helps! but everyone here is right man theres lots of life to live at your age!

[AgEnT-]

Don't do it man.
You look like you are in pretty good shape and have a lot of stuff going right for you.
i know you feel like its the end of the world, but trust me it will get better.
you will prob be moping for a while, but thats teh bad part of falling in love.
at least you were happy in the relationship while it lasted.
you need to move on, regardless of how long it takes.
hope everything works out well man.

If she left you, then she isnt worth it. Let her come back to you

[Heaven_is_Here]

love is tough man... i took a pyschology class in college the professor said the best way to get a girl back is to live a happy and full-filling life. it's a game if you ask me.. if you jus go out and have fun with your boys and meet new girls and jus stop texting her. she will want you back! my ex-gf is already texting me and trying to talk. but jus stop texting her! if u do happen to talk to her then jus say sorry it didnt work out, its going to be hard to get over u but in time ill be ok, hope u find the person your looking for and i hope u wish the same great things for me in my life... people only want they cant have girls are no different. but man to think about suicide is stubborn you times your emotions by 10X and put it on everyone u know cuz they just lost u in their life....think about it..hope this helps! but everyone here is right man theres lots of life to live at your age!

thank u bro, i think i will definatly try that, just gotta be strong and not txt her, I have left her alone for a little bit tonight and she was abit nicer to me. if she does finally say she wants to work things out or come home or be with me, what do i do? Do I say come home now? Or do i say i duno we can talk about it and act distant? Or just act normal and say i would love to have u back.

[Heaven_is_Here]

Don't do it man.
You look like you are in pretty good shape and have a lot of stuff going right for you.
i know you feel like its the end of the world, but trust me it will get better.
you will prob be moping for a while, but thats teh bad part of falling in love.
at least you were happy in the relationship while it lasted.
you need to move on, regardless of how long it takes.
hope everything works out well man.

If she left you, then she isnt worth it. Let her come back to you

thank you too man i appreciate it. i am i think in good shape for my age, i have juiced tho i think thats why im so ****ed up emotionally lol i duno tho ive had a messed up up bringing. Its so hard to just grasp that and say it, that she isnt worth it if she leaves and doesnt come back, it just makes me want to beg for her and try and make things work. Fck i really wish girls could just be more mature and not run and hide when ur at work and just talk things out.

from what ive read nobody likes a needy person do they? If she comes back should i be more alhpa and be less caring and loving cause i am very caring to her.

[tbrady12]

just respect yourself... say i deserve the best too. u shouldnt have to beg for her back. u can still be yourself and all that stuff. in the end regardless of what i say or anyone says your goin to do what u want and act how u want...but dont fold over like a lawn chair when she wants u to do something. a relationship is and should be equal. if its always one person doing everything for the other is that equal? is that love?

[bigboy18]

dat ass

On a serious note, brah... you're 21 go out and live life. You're a free man once again... Don't let her be ABOVE you... If she ends up coming back to you great..in the mean time..meet other women and take your mind off her... I bet she's eating you alive deep inside... DONT LET THAT HAPPEN. Also don't kill your self breh.

Thats all I have to say.

[wesbender]

This is what you need to do. You need to make a decision in yourself right now to stop being a needy, jealous bitch. Jealousy is going to destroy any relationship you get into, and that's always going to be the case.

You need to leave her alone and give her space. The more you beg for her back, the farther away she will go. If she wants you back, she will let you know. But just remember, and this is the 100% truth, the more you push for her now - text/call/communicate in any way, the farther away she will put herself from you.

Give it time and space. She'll come back if she truly want you. And no texting. Period.

If she doesn't come back, give yourself time to get over her. Take note of the things that ruined that relationship and change yourself for the better.

[Bones98]

you need to take that picture off from your profile. That **** is going to haunt you.

[Heaven_is_Here]

This is what you need to do. You need to make a decision in yourself right now to stop being a needy, jealous bitch. Jealousy is going to destroy any relationship you get into, and that's always going to be the case.

You need to leave her alone and give her space. The more you beg for her back, the farther away she will go. If she wants you back, she will let you know. But just remember, and this is the 100% truth, the more you push for her now - text/call/communicate in any way, the farther away she will put herself from you.

Give it time and space. She'll come back if she truly want you. And no texting. Period.

If she doesn't come back, give yourself time to get over her. Take note of the things that ruined that relationship and change yourself for the better.

thanks bro, i have decided fully i will do that, i need to. I will give her space 100 percent and see what happens.

dat ass

On a serious note, brah... you're 21 go out and live life. You're a free man once again... Don't let her be ABOVE you... If she ends up coming back to you great..in the mean time..meet other women and take your mind off her... I bet she's eating you alive deep inside... DONT LET THAT HAPPEN. Also don't kill your self breh.

Thats all I have to say.

im so socially awkard now its hard for me to go out. i litearlly spent all my time with her whgile she went out with her friends and talked bad about me lol.

just respect yourself... say i deserve the best too. u shouldnt have to beg for her back. u can still be yourself and all that stuff. in the end regardless of what i say or anyone says your goin to do what u want and act how u want...but dont fold over like a lawn chair when she wants u to do something. a relationship is and should be equal. if its always one person doing everything for the other is that equal? is that love?

thanks bro, i am going to try and be a better person, i barely went to the gym for past year cause i was trying to spend all the time i could with her. If she comes back i will make more time for myself and make myself better and hopfully she will respect me more and i hope i will respect myself more and this wont happen again.

I dont think i desrved for her to just leave me while i was at work and break my heart when i got home, but i guess i didnt deserve to smoother her either? I hate it cause she hated seeing me talk to girls and made me cut all girls out of contact. and i asked her to do the same out of respect but with boys and i think she wants that freedom too,but at the same time i know she doesnt want me to associate with girls lol.

Like she mentions all the time how jealous she gets that she thinks i loved my ex's more than her and she said that was one of the reasons she left cause of that.

[big stud steve]

dude quit being emo... everything will be ok


just let her have her space and try not to talk to her for a week

dont be there for her
dont show her mow much u love her
dont ****in beg for her back

[wesbender]

Also, just remember that she is going to be a hell of a lot more attracted to you if you can pick up some self-confidence and don't show any sort of reliance on her for anything.

Not saying you need to be some hard-ass who doesn't give a ****, but somewhere in between.

[bigboy18]

Don't put the pussy on the pedestal

[Heaven_is_Here]

dude quit being emo... everything will be ok


just let her have her space and try not to talk to her for a week

dont be there for her
dont show her mow much u love her
dont ****in beg for her back

i know, im messed up man, really emo lol. i will definatly do that i know i need to now.

Also, just remember that she is going to be a hell of a lot more attracted to you if you can pick up some self-confidence and don't show any sort of reliance on her for anything.

Not saying you need to be some hard-ass who doesn't give a ****, but somewhere in between.

thanks, u all are getting it into my head, I use to be very self respectful but some where lost it. I really am going to and need to do this. I am going to show her im doing things for myself without her and improving myself and my life and hope she becomes attracted to me again and n wants me back, and i will keep this going i hope. I need to.

its finding that line in between that u mentioned is hard. I guess dont be a jerk but show her i can move on anytime right? Kinda show her im fully indeptant but love her and want to spend my life with her, but would be fine on my own and would leave HER if she screwed me over. I think this is the right way to be?

[wesbender]

its finding that line in between that u mentioned is hard. I guess dont be a jerk but show her i can move on anytime right? Kinda show her im fully indeptant but love her and want to spend my life with her, but would be fine on my own and would leave HER if she screwed me over. I think this is the right way to be?

Independent is probably the best way to describe what you need to be. Not an ass, but not a bitch either. Just don't make it seem like you're trying too hard.

What you need to do, which isn't easy, is genuinely change the way you carry yourself. Don't put on some fake tough-guy persona to try and impress. It's not an overnight change, but just try as hard as you can. Be consistent with the things you change about yourself and you'll be a much better man in the long run.

The most important thing is to make sure whatever you change about yourself isn't some fake, forced change.

[starting-big]

first things first i suggest changing your dp like one of the other guys said.. and any other pics you have that you will see of her hide them or change them..
the msg's thats saved in ur inbox delete them. pics on your phone delete them. and last go out have some fun and get laid

[Bonifacius]

The more needy you act, the less she'll want you. I don't know why guys don't understand this simple equation.

[dick_nose_dwane]

brah,

been there done that. she doesnt love you and thinks your beta, it's game over. just move on. if she did care about you she wouldnt care about jealousy and all that nonsense, it's just a scapegoat she's using.

females are more jealous than males they can hide it better than us that's all. and they want you to have a bit of jealousy in you when they go out.

if a chick really cares about you she will do anything in her power to stay with you and not treat you like ****. we all become "needy" when we find someone we truely love, and knock off the alpha bull****. (but you do have to remain somewhat alpha, dont get me wrong. just a diff. type of alpha) i didnt know this was true until i found the girl of my dreams who would do anything for me and id do the same. goes completely out of her way to make me happy non stop. isnt this what you want? you arent going to get it from this girl. there is a girl out there for you that cant live without you, find that one who needs you as much as you need them.

[StreetWise]

Do you know how lucky you are to be here? Seriously think about it. Do you know how luck you are that the potential for lifeform was on an asteroid that hit this planet (wiping out the dinosaurs).

Do you know how lucky we are that those organisms transformed into lifeform from sea to land to monkey to human being? Do you know how lucky you are that EACH one of your ancestors managed to survive on this planet long enough to replicate your EXACT dna pattern?

Do you know how lucky you are that you are a 21 year old man in a free country like the United States where you have the opportunity to better yourself every minute?


















And you're gonna let some bitch wipe you out...lol.

[FCFgerardo]

went through the same **** a while ago, she ended it i was beta about it, ignored her for a while, we got back together but it was to late i was done so i left. Havent spoken to her since, she still tries to contact me.

live and learn man, it just takes time you'll be over it and banging broads before you know it.

[StreetWise]

I seriously cant believe you people dont understand this anymore.

We all know women prefer men with higher value? The man with the most value= the most attractive. Therefore when you met your girlfriend she valued you which means a bunch of things like she thought you were good looking, good body, popular, have money, wanted by lots of women, good sense of humour ETC. Could be lots of things.

When you're in a relationship with her your value basically diminishes because she knows you are 100% stuck on her. WOMEN WANT TO BE A PART OF YOUR LIFE...NOT YOUR WHOLE LIFE.

Your value decreases as you become more needy and dependant on her. You stop thinking about other women therefore it doesnt matter how desired you are, she knows that you're her bitch for life. She tells you what to do, you have absolutely NO MASCULINITY, you stop MAKING DECISIONS, SHE GOES OUT WITH HER FRIENDS SEES OTHER GUYS OF HIGH VALUE WHO LOOK FUN AND EXCITING YET SHE KNOWS SHE HAS TO COME HOME TO YOUR WHINEY BORING LOVED UP DEMASCULINED ASS











The person with the least commitment holds the reigns in a relationship. The man must ALWAYS hold the reigns in a relationship. It's in our dna to have LESS commitment to an extent. Go figure.

[Lost_it_to_a_9]

This is why i will make sure that i never be so dependant on anyone...

Come on brah... I know how you feel, i know how it feels to be heart broken and feel like u lost the love of ur life, but believe me, you WILL FIND SOMEONE ELSE, who will make you feel better...

The more you beg, the more your pushing her away... change ur ways now, so you dont make the same mistakes with your next gf... take this as a learning experience...

fuk sakes brah, your still young...

Thoughts of suicide? come on brah... no one, and i mean NO ONE should ever make you feel so bad about yourself that you think about killing yourself... to me that makes it clear that they are clearly not the one for you.

[DaBurg3r]

so for whoever wants to help here it is.

my gf left me while at work yesterday. I have talked to her here and there in the past 2 days, i have begged for her back n gave her space. but she still doesnt wanna come back home to me.

Be patient

Her reasons it seems are this, there vague but this is what she gives me, I smoother her to much, I am always needy, which is true.

I dont let her have enough time with friends ( I am not forcefully controlling I sub conciously just say whats on my mind and make her feel bad about not spending enuff time with me and she doesnt go out with her friends).

She needs time to find herself and needs space and maybe in a week we can try n work things out but she doesnt know.

Being emotionally manipulative i.e. trying to leverage someone's behavior with guilt trips is a form of abuse. Being excessively needy is not a good sign either, it can be scary to people because it shows a lack of clearly defined interpersonal boundaries. Sometimes people develop an attitude of being "entitled" to having their bf/gf spend all their free time with them.

other than that I know her friends n family hate me and i have caughter her talking bad about me alot how jealous i am, which is true, but so is she. her friends n family are talking her out of being with me past few days and to stay at home were its better for her so shes got lots of support right now.

She is young and no doubt wants and needs to see the world for herself, eventually she will resent you for holding her back. The whole being excessively jealous (granted you didn't use that word) is a sign of controlling behavior.

I am not saying that your a bad person or that your intentionally making the effort to be an abusive and controlling partner. However, that's the turn that things are taking judging by what you are saying.

The constant need to be "in control" and get what you want is going to make you suffer constant anxiety, stress and perhaps guilt. Low self-esteem goes hand in hand with all that as well.

Her friends and family may not like you at all I don't know, and they may very well be talking bad about you. People talk about people, we humans are very social. Plus, your ex-g/f friends and family are her support network, and if she isn't happy with the relationship then that's just how it is.

She said she wants space and her friends and family are supporting her decision to get the space she needs. She told you what she wants, and she's getting it this should not be surprising to you. Your (ex)g/f needs space and time to herself so she can think things through clearly. At some point your going to have to realize she won't and can't help you carry your emotional burden. She needs her own life too.

So what do i do? Act like im fine and dandy?

be her friend and be there for her but dont ask for her back just let her know she can come back if she wants

just be a friend

beg for her?

Be positive, she said you could talk in a week? Give her two.

Don't beg, it's debasing and you'll only resent her later for being so "mean" to you. Or not caring or whatever

or what.. please help lol, i know i have problems i am a very needy person and have been getting such bad thoughts about life right now cause i feel like i cant breathe without her here sleepin with me.

help...

You do sound emotionally needy, you need to change that. Get some more friends, go out a couple times a month just to do something with yourself besides sit around dwelling on things that upset you.

You were living fine before you got with your girlfriend, I am sure you will be fine after wards too. Your both young, and I know both of you have yet to see all the world has to offer you.

No one person can satisfy your emotional needs, it's not possible and holding someone to that expectation is un-realistic. Putting someone up on a pedestal is the surest way to guarantee they fall, at some point your going to be let down by that person.

Don't threaten suicide if she leaves you, it's a form of abuse. (srs)

You need to find something to do with yourself, a goal a purpose, an objective to give your days meaning. That way you can track your progress and the improvements you make along the way.

I think every man needs to leave some kind of legacy behind him, some place he can look back and point out "there, that's where I left my mark on the world." Proof that you didn't just pass through life like some ghost without leaving a trace, and nothing of importance behind.

Having a girlfriend is nice but, you need more than just a girlfriend to be happy in life.

You need a life with meaning and happiness in it that you can bring other people in to, whether they stay around or not won't matter because you will still have your ambitions and desires.

Anyway I'm rambling.

Now cowboy the fu*k up, and handle your business properly.