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  1. #1
    Registered User ReardenMetal's Avatar
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    telling a girl how you feel (what NOT to say?)

    i'm planning to tell this girl how i feel about her. ive known her for a while (2 years) but just recently i've started to want her as my gf. i havent really played the "white knight" (although i have complemented her on her looks before) and i KNOW for a fact im not in the "friend zone" because of the way i interacted with her and her friends when i hung out with them.

    I plan to tell her about myself a little more (my friends, why i do the things i do, ect) and then tell her how i feel about her and why.

    is there anything i should add, or maybe anything i should avoid saying?
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  2. #2
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    Originally Posted by ReardenMetal View Post
    i'm planning to tell this girl how i feel about her. ive known her for a while (2 years) but just recently i've started to want her as my gf. i havent really played the "white knight" (although i have complemented her on her looks before) and i KNOW for a fact im not in the "friend zone" because of the way i interacted with her and her friends when i hung out with them.

    I plan to tell her about myself a little more (my friends, why i do the things i do, ect) and then tell her how i feel about her and why.

    is there anything i should add, or maybe anything i should avoid saying?
    You know you're doing it wrong when you mention this...
    DON'T TELL A GIRL HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT HER UNLESS YOU WANT HER AS A FRIEND. Actions speak louder than words.
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  3. #3
    Registered User matt2301's Avatar
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    Don't say anything, say everything with your actions. Put your arm around her, kiss her (cheek or lips), hold her hand
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  4. #4
    Banned Ultimus's Avatar
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    Once you let a girl know that you like her, it's over.
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  5. #5
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    why don't you just ask her out and go do something and then kiss her.....why the hell would you tell her how you feel, unless she confesses first.
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  6. #6
    Registered User ReardenMetal's Avatar
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    hmmm....

    i went to school with this girl, then i didnt see her for like a year. i barely talked to her and i barely see her. hung out with her like two weeks ago, and i guess i was just restless cuz i couldnt really get her alone because she was with all her friends and family and stuff.

    but i'll reconsider, in fact i'll ask her to come hang out with my friends for a change.
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  7. #7
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  8. #8
    Registered User Trapezius82's Avatar
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    Everyones right on with there points, u tell her how u feel the how game is over no matter what u think she feels for u. If she realizes she has u already especially without even hooking up its Game Over. U gotta put urself in a situation where its just u and her set up a date and then make ur move. If you try coming at her with word before a hookup ur back in grade school again. Just think how awkward it will be for her around u after u spill ur guts u gotta leave something to the imagination.
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  9. #9
    Registered User GreenTea99's Avatar
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    Eh, this is where I disagree with most of the traditional theory..
    Yes, telling a girl how you feel is often times bad and gives the girl all the power, etc... but that's only when it's done in a needy way.
    As a wussbag in high school, I definitely learned, that, BUT I've found that telling a girl how you feel is actually sometimes a very positive thing.
    If you're a really confident/dominant guy and you're pretty sure a girl is attracted to you, I've found that telling a girl you like her// have feelings for her is actually a REALLY positive thing. If you do it with confidence and secruity, instead of in a way that pines for her approval, it gives you a sense of vulnerability that's actually attractive.
    Sometimes really confident/dominant guys kind of make girls unsure if they want to get involved. Yes, they'll be attracted to you, but sometimes if you have zero sense of vulnerability, they'll be too unsure to get involved.

    It's benificial (for you, and not the girls) if you're learning game, to practise this on people you don't ACTUALLY have feelings for at first.. I'm not really condoning it as you might//probably will end up hurting chicks by doing it, but it helps you learn how to express feelings in a confident way.

    I mean yeah, actions are probably more important and you have to have the body language and physical escalation to accomodate it, but telling a girl your feelings is definitely a tool that can work to your advantage.

    In your particular situation, you don't seem like you're at that point yet, so right now telling her your feelings will probably **** it up, but later on it's fine.
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  10. #10
    Registered User solidsnake88's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by GreenTea99 View Post
    Eh, this is where I disagree with most of the traditional theory..
    Yes, telling a girl how you feel is often times bad and gives the girl all the power, etc... but that's only when it's done in a needy way.
    As a wussbag in high school, I definitely learned, that, BUT I've found that telling a girl how you feel is actually sometimes a very positive thing.
    If you're a really confident/dominant guy and you're pretty sure a girl is attracted to you, I've found that telling a girl you like her// have feelings for her is actually a REALLY positive thing. If you do it with confidence and secruity, instead of in a way that pines for her approval, it gives you a sense of vulnerability that's actually attractive.
    Sometimes really confident/dominant guys kind of make girls unsure if they want to get involved. Yes, they'll be attracted to you, but sometimes if you have zero sense of vulnerability, they'll be too unsure to get involved.

    It's benificial (for you, and not the girls) if you're learning game, to practise this on people you don't ACTUALLY have feelings for at first.. I'm not really condoning it as you might//probably will end up hurting chicks by doing it, but it helps you learn how to express feelings in a confident way.

    I mean yeah, actions are probably more important and you have to have the body language and physical escalation to accomodate it, but telling a girl your feelings is definitely a tool that can work to your advantage.

    In your particular situation, you don't seem like you're at that point yet, so right now telling her your feelings will probably **** it up, but later on it's fine.
    i stopped reading there. of course anything will work if the girl is attracted to you...op doesn't know this yet so he can't do this.
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  11. #11
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    Simple approach:

    Take her out for the night to have drinks and hang out..........(no roofies)
    Conclusions to be reached:
    If she won't go::::::dead issue
    If you guys go out and she checks out other dudes:::::EAD ISSUE
    If you go out and thier is some friendly physical contact and playful ****::::::Looking good
    If you go out and thier is some friendly physical contact and playful **** and she also pulls some dirty girl off the dancefloor for you two:SOULMATE
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  12. #12
    I got buku hammers Navillus13's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by GreenTea99 View Post
    Eh, this is where I disagree with most of the traditional theory..
    Yes, telling a girl how you feel is often times bad and gives the girl all the power, etc... but that's only when it's done in a needy way.
    As a wussbag in high school, I definitely learned, that, BUT I've found that telling a girl how you feel is actually sometimes a very positive thing.
    If you're a really confident/dominant guy and you're pretty sure a girl is attracted to you, I've found that telling a girl you like her// have feelings for her is actually a REALLY positive thing. If you do it with confidence and secruity, instead of in a way that pines for her approval, it gives you a sense of vulnerability that's actually attractive.
    Sometimes really confident/dominant guys kind of make girls unsure if they want to get involved. Yes, they'll be attracted to you, but sometimes if you have zero sense of vulnerability, they'll be too unsure to get involved.

    It's benificial (for you, and not the girls) if you're learning game, to practise this on people you don't ACTUALLY have feelings for at first.. I'm not really condoning it as you might//probably will end up hurting chicks by doing it, but it helps you learn how to express feelings in a confident way.

    I mean yeah, actions are probably more important and you have to have the body language and physical escalation to accomodate it, but telling a girl your feelings is definitely a tool that can work to your advantage.

    In your particular situation, you don't seem like you're at that point yet, so right now telling her your feelings will probably **** it up, but later on it's fine.
    Dont listen to this dude.

    AND NEVER TELL A GIRL YOU LIKE HER.. EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER. Let her fckin come on to you.. just have fun with her and neg her every so often...then make a move when it feels right.. just dont talk.
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  13. #13
    Atheist Alliance Wannabe slammedsl1's Avatar
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    I don't agree with "you shouldn't say anything"

    There's things you can say to let a girl know you like her without actually saying you like her, sounds like some noob wannabe PUA's quoting some **** they don't understand...
    Last edited by slammedsl1; 07-17-2009 at 01:15 PM.
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  14. #14
    Registered User ReardenMetal's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by slammedsl1 View Post
    I don't agree with "you shouldn't say anything"

    There's things you can say to let a girl know you like her without actually saying you like her, sounds like some noob wannabe PUA's quoting some **** they don't understand...
    damn...now i've got a lot of points to consider lol
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  15. #15
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    i always thought u wait till u r actually dating and been together a while to let go the verbal feeling stuff....

    but as some others have said it does seem like once a girl knows u care about her and would do anything for her, she doesn't want u anymore. It seems like all they want is a committment and someone to show how much they care and blah blah, then when it happens they run away.

    Good luck, have fun with that!
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  16. #16
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    you do not say anything. You simply begin hooking up for a period of time until you have the "talk" regarding your exclusiveness.
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  17. #17
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    Originally Posted by spaghettii View Post
    you know you're doing it wrong when you mention this...
    don't tell a girl how you feel about her unless you want her as a friend. actions speak louder than words.
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