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Thread: after a loss

  1. #1
    Registered User ruds55's Avatar
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    after a loss

    How many people have had trouble with getting back into their training after a loss of friend or family member?

    Just lost a close relative and I only managed to get into the gym once this week. My mind has been out of it and its hurting my diet and training......

    Hoping for the fog to clear soon and not to lose focus of my goals.
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  2. #2
    Registered User Squall243's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by ruds55 View Post
    How many people have had trouble with getting back into their training after a loss of friend or family member?

    Just lost a close relative and I only managed to get into the gym once this week. My mind has been out of it and its hurting my diet and training......

    Hoping for the fog to clear soon and not to lose focus of my goals.
    Sorry to hear about your loss, Im a Toxicology student so this is my best advice and explanation:

    At the moment your body is trying to relieve the stress caused by your loss and I wouldnt advise doing any working out (Weights) for a couple of weeks as the added stress will cause an elevated level of Cortisol (which can cause depression) to go into your system which breaks down muscle and causes extra testosterone to be released which after being free in your system for a while will be converted to di-hydrotestosterone which makes hair fall out etc.

    A couple of days a week of cardio will be far better and you wont be as tired+ you will sleep better and it will give you body a chance to adapt to your loss ie grieving. Your body and mind will be alot more focused after a couple of weeks and Id advise you to take it easy when you get back. So in summary: Swap your nomal workout routine days for half hour session of cardio (running/rowing) for two weeks, then do one week of working out at about 60% of what you normally do then increase intensity up to your norm weight.
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  3. #3
    Registered User InHonorInMind's Avatar
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    Hey Dude, I know what you're going through. My mom passed away (completely un-expectedly) around this same time last year. Take a look at my page and check out my transformation. You can't focus on the loss, ya gotta focus on the strength from inside. To learn that life is so short and to literally make EVERY MOMENT COUNT---NO MATTER WHAT!!!! I understand, your feelings, and so you should grieve, but don't let it consume you. I was literally consumed with so much hate and anger after I lost my mom. But I thank god for the iron to take out my anger on. I just keep pushing it day in and day out and just think about my mom being there training along side me, pushing me to get that last rep out, to do an extra 20 mins of cardio, standing behind me and pushing me on to be strong! lifting me up!!! I know its hard, and there are days that just full on suck....but life is short....realize that....and make it the BEST LIFE you've ever had. Now get fired up and get back in there buddy! Get back in there!!!!!!
    "Not ALL engineers are fat and lazy...."
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  4. #4
    oO TANK Oo VoxExMachina's Avatar
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    If you feel mentally able to handle the gym, then go. Work out, tire yourself out, and it will probably make you feel better.

    If you are too emotionally upset to handle the gym, then give yourself a break and don't feel guilty. But circle a date on the calendar when you will get back in the gym. You will feel better knowing that you are giving yourself a planned, specific break, but will also make sure that your temporary break doesn't "accidentallly" turn into never getting back into the swing of things.

    Best of luck, and sorry to hear about your loss.
    Ω
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  5. #5
    The Monkey At the Gym pp301's Avatar
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    yep...i had a losss...failed my driving test...not much of a heavy loss but for me its quite something....

    one thing i life to abide by...always keep your lifes seperate

    never bring your school life home (you get pissed off with a teacher dont be pissed off with your parents)

    never let any other life come into contact with another...gota deal with it when the time is right...for now wats done is done
    What do you call a "Quarter Pounder with Cheese" in Europe
    ......A Royale With Cheese...
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  6. #6
    Banned DanTheManB's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by ruds55 View Post
    How many people have had trouble with getting back into their training after a loss of friend or family member?

    Just lost a close relative and I only managed to get into the gym once this week. My mind has been out of it and its hurting my diet and training......

    Hoping for the fog to clear soon and not to lose focus of my goals.
    I experienced it firsthand. I'm no Doctor nor do I major in anything extraordinary.

    I found my g/f dead in her room on my birthday...she had hung herself...I ripped down the scarf she used but it was too late. I could barely eat or sleep for a month. I still went to work out and do what I could do even though I couldn't go over 225 in anything.

    It helped me recover substantially. You don't want to change your normal routine too much after something like this. You need to keep your life moving forward in some ways. Hope this helps.
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  7. #7
    Banned DanTheManB's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by InHonorInMind View Post
    Hey Dude, I know what you're going through. My mom passed away (completely un-expectedly) around this same time last year. Take a look at my page and check out my transformation. You can't focus on the loss, ya gotta focus on the strength from inside. To learn that life is so short and to literally make EVERY MOMENT COUNT---NO MATTER WHAT!!!! I understand, your feelings, and so you should grieve, but don't let it consume you. I was literally consumed with so much hate and anger after I lost my mom. But I thank god for the iron to take out my anger on. I just keep pushing it day in and day out and just think about my mom being there training along side me, pushing me to get that last rep out, to do an extra 20 mins of cardio, standing behind me and pushing me on to be strong! lifting me up!!! I know its hard, and there are days that just full on suck....but life is short....realize that....and make it the BEST LIFE you've ever had. Now get fired up and get back in there buddy! Get back in there!!!!!!
    beautiful post
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  8. #8
    Registered User dannyboy27's Avatar
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    Well take a break and when you feel enough time has passed for you to go on normally, start up again.
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    Registered User ruds55's Avatar
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    One day at a time

    Thanks for the info guys and girls!!! I managed one day in the gym this week but I kept the diet clean and I will startup back on Monday... Really messed up my supplement regimen!

    Keeping my head up, eyes focused, mind clear, and heart where it needs to be?
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  10. #10
    Registered User euroinferno's Avatar
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    hey same thing happened to me my grandma passed a month ago, but i also spent the month before that in the hospital i couldnt hit the weights, couldnt get much food down, i just wasnt into it dropped 7 pounds =S but eventually things will get better and youll come back better then before =)
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  11. #11
    Registered User InHonorInMind's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by DanTheManB View Post
    beautiful post


    Thank you. I'm sorry to read about your loss...I can't even imagine...

    Its nice that we all have a place to connect and talk about our hardships...just know that there IS light at the end and its a sweet sweet light....
    "Not ALL engineers are fat and lazy...."
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  12. #12
    Registered User paolo59's Avatar
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    When my brother died, I didn't feel like doing anything for several months. It takes time to emotionally work through the loss of a loved one. You literally don't know what you're feeling, or sometimes even why. If I think on it too much, it can still have incredible effects on me to this day. One never forgets, but you've got to move on eventually. Best wishes, and good luck!
    Last edited by paolo59; 07-06-2009 at 03:45 PM.
    paolo59

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    I'm sorry to hear about your lose,usually its best to keep your mind pre-occupied with other things. That way there is less time for you to think about the lose although its something very hard to over come. Time is your best friend and only time heals those wounds. My advice to you is try and stay busy.
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