Almost 90 days Sober (SERIOUS) (Log)

[supersexystud]

Well im on my path to sobriety and I thought this would be constructive. Maybe some of u would find it interesting.

Well where to start?

My alcohol use history:

-First drank at 16. First time drinking got blackout drunk off half a fifth of gin
-Drank every other weekend or every weekend til 18
-18 became every weekend
-19 moved out and the drinking became 3-5 days a week
-21 at least 3 times per week

Binges:

I don't even know what you would consider a binge...

-Often would drink in the morning to cure hangover and then continue
-A binge while I was 19 lasted 2 weeks. Had to get rides to school from friends and would sometimes have a water bottle of vodka

-Hundreds of 2-5 day binges


Amount I would drink:

age 16-18- 10-15 beers/drinks

age 19-20- 15+ beers at least 3 nights a week usually 5. Sometimes an entire fifth per night

age 21 (quit hard a)- at least 18 beers friday/saturday and wednesday night. Sometimes 20-25



Arrests:

1. Mip at age 17
2. Mip (minor in possession) at age 20

3. Night of my 21st bday I drank well over a fifth and was blacked out for about 2 hours. I guess i tried to go into my "friends" house but it was the wrong one. Never entered, never took anything, just pulled on the door that was locked. Cops came, guns were drawn and i was in jail for 3 days for "attempted residential burglary"... Load of horse**** but i got it all dropped.

After i got out i went and got drunk at the rodeo

Day charges were dropped i drank a pint of SOCO 100 proof and some vodka and broke some stuff in my house falling down.

4. DUI at age 21. I have no excuse. Driving drunk is the one thing that I never did but I guess I blacked out and did that night. I got pulled over a couple hundred yards away from my house. Blew a .251 and was taken to jail. Parents had to get me.


That night/next day I realized how out of hand my life had become.
Weight gain
change in attitude
deteriorating health
Hurting the people i loved
spending 70 bux a week on booze
Missing school because i couldn't get out of bed
Very high risk lifestyle



I went to my attorney and told him I wanted help with the case but I had no problem going to rehab or whatever for my own benefit.

Withdrawls:
-Luckily i wasnt physically addicted enough for much
-Slight shakes
-Anxiety was very very bad and i had my first panic attack


Current status:

I am attending intensive out patient groups for 2 hours a day
My Dui is in defferal so I have probation for 5 years along with tons of classes
Going to AA at least 2 times a week
Havent touched a drink in 86 DAYS!
Health is improving
Losing weight


U guys can add encouragement if u have gone through this or ask questions. I have had extremely wild things happen to me through the years. All has hopefully shaped me into a better person.


Please don't post rude things. I would like for this to be constructive.


I will add on to this. I have a ton of stories. I have some advice to give for those who are interested. Im pretty up front with it in real life so I thought i would share with misc.

[KingSht]

Wow. What can I say? Well done...

So when can you get oyur driver's licence back?

[Purge]

God bless and keep up the good work.

[supersexystud]

Originally Posted by KingSht

Wow. What can I say? Well done...

So when can you get oyur driver's licence back?

oh yea.. I forgot to mention

I need to get ignition interlock (the thingy you blow into to drive) But it costs like 80 a month.


I also lost my job for the summer. I was training to be a tour bus guide/driver in alaska. I can't do anything to change it now. Just gotta move on.

[PatrickDurden]

Congrats.

[ImitatioDei]

(srs)

[tommyguy]

well done

[KingSht]

Originally Posted by supersexystud

oh yea.. I forgot to mention

I need to get ignition interlock (the thingy you blow into to drive) But it costs like 80 a month.


I also lost my job for the summer. I was training to be a tour bus guide/driver in alaska. I can't do anything to change it now. Just gotta move on.

I've never driven under the influence (or been caught at least) but thought you lost your licence. I guess it's different in the States.

That ignition interlock gizmo sounds interesting

[superdump250]

dude ****ing good job man heres what alcohol caused for me




Arrests: 6 MIPs

thankfully thats all


Health deterioration: got acid reflux, got fat, badskin, thin nails and ridges in them the fukers damn near peel off if i tried to open a beer.



ive been sober for 10 days and before last week i was sober for 40 days.


I just recently got drunk and broke my ankle in 3 places and am now in a cast.....dunno if i can go to the Marines now

also have anxiety and panic attacks if im hungover from drinking.



all around it pretty much ruined alot of my life.

[BIGDUBBDEISEL]

How do you get a panic attack? Like is it while you're hungover and how is it? I'm pretty sure i've been getting them day's after i drink alot.

[supersexystud]

Originally Posted by KingSht

I've never driven under the influence (or been caught at least) but thought you lost your licence. I guess it's different in the States.

That ignition interlock gizmo sounds interesting

well I got it suspended but my lawyer got me a temporary license for a while. Now that I entered deffered prosecution, part of it is having the interlock.

I am not against drinking. I think its fine for some people. It doesnt really lead to anything good for the most part though. I know all of my classes consider it a "disease" and all but I dont know my opinion on that.

It feels like a disease for me. Every day it is in the back of my mind and I have to overcome it but I don't know how much of a disease it is.

My conselor for treatment told me its not my fault. Some people are alcoholics and some arent. But I saw this coming about 3 years ago. I knew I was an alcoholic but just drank more and more. I guess that could be part of the disease?

[dean.]

gjsssm!

[Beachbum1546]

Nice job! reps. I'm currently 2 days with no drinks or cigarettes. The anxiety is annoying as ****. How long till it goes away?

[supersexystud]

Originally Posted by BIGDUBBDEISEL

How do you get a panic attack? Like is it while you're hungover and how is it? I'm pretty sure i've been getting them day's after i drink alot.

Well... I wasnt use to goin more then 3 days without drinking and when i say drinking.. I mean goin out and drinking a case or buying an 18 pack of beer, bringing that home and drinking it all in 2 hours then lookin for more...


So... when I quit drinking I had those urges really really bad and just craved it. I sat at my computer alone for hours at a time just to keep from freakin out. My friends were out drinking and I am 21, I could easily go buy a case and curb that craving but I had to chose not to.


Back when i drank a lot hangovers varied. Sometimes i could honestly drink a fifth and get up the next day feeling so good. Go play some basketball or just start drinking again. Or I could puke for the next 24 hours. varied.

[supersexystud]

Originally Posted by Beachbum1546

Nice job! reps. I'm currently 2 days with no drinks or cigarettes. The anxiety is annoying as ****. How long till it goes away?

Well it may be diff cuz of cigs also i dunno?

For me the first 3 days were hard. Then the first weekend. After that it gradually got better. Try to keep urself occupied when u feel anxiety.

I know for me personally I HAVE to do this and it will be the best decision I will ever make. I could easily relapse though and I know I would drink as much or more than ever ....



Things get easier though. I hope u can keep it up and I will offer whatever advice i can.

[superdump250]

Originally Posted by supersexystud

Well... I wasnt use to goin more then 3 days without drinking and when i say drinking.. I mean goin out and drinking a case or buying an 18 pack of beer, bringing that home and drinking it all in 2 hours then lookin for more...


So... when I quit drinking I had those urges really really bad and just craved it. I sat at my computer alone for hours at a time just to keep from freakin out. My friends were out drinking and I am 21, I could easily go buy a case and curb that craving but I had to chose not to.


Back when i drank a lot hangovers varied. Sometimes i could honestly drink a fifth and get up the next day feeling so good. Go play some basketball or just start drinking again. Or I could puke for the next 24 hours. varied.

yeah but what are ur panic attacks like? choking feeling, drymouth, rapid heartbeat, sweating?

[Lucide]

.225?! holy christ.

[supersexystud]

Originally Posted by superdump250

yeah but what are ur panic attacks like? choking feeling, drymouth, rapid heartbeat, sweating?

My mind starts racing. Kinda shakey. Rapid heartbeat. Some sweating. I feel like my mind is jumping all around also. no choking, no drymouth

I use to sweat 24/7 cuz i drank so much. Thats a nice side effect to have gone.

[whatkey]

Good luck man. my dad went through the same thing...its good to get it out of the way now, trust me. it will ruin your life.

[supersexystud]

Originally Posted by Lucide

.225?! holy christ.

Yea I guess thats pretty high but I wasnt even that drunk for me.

On my bday im sure i was well over a .300 I took a breathtest and I saw it get to .4 and stop.... The cops tried to rush me to the hospital but I talked them out of it and they threw out the papers. Never even showed up on my lawyer's papers that I ever blew that night. I am not claiming for sure that it was .4 because I don't know how they work exactly but I saw the numbers go like .7---.65.... and so on to .4 when it stopped. Maybe that doesnt mean anything.

U have to have a high tolerance to even live through really high bacs. Guess I was lucky in that sense.

[Beachbum1546]

Originally Posted by Lucide

.225?! holy christ.

I believe it. Alcoholic's tolerances are so high, it's hard to believe at times. For example, two weeks ago I was at my friends house pre-gaming with vodka. In a span of two hours, I ended up taking 17 shots JUST AS A PREGAME. After we all went bar hopping and I probably got another 5-6 drinks.

[Beachbum1546]

Originally Posted by whatkey

Good luck man. my dad went through the same thing...its good to get it out of the way now, trust me. it will ruin your life.

the main thing I want to get back is my rocking bod. I used to be stacked when my drinking was less than once a week. I think if I cut it out completely, I'll be in great shape.

[supersexystud]

Originally Posted by Lucide

.225?! holy christ.

Typo... I just looked at my court papers

It was .251 at my truck then like a .240 at the station.

[mickeylax311]

I decided to quit drinking and smoking as well a few days ago. Started getting heartburn and bad panic attacks when I woke up hungover. Basically for me I would get lightheaded then this weird feeling of being really aware. Heart beat started lurching then speed up to almost 160. Never really felt too sick. Sometimes it felt hard to breathe. I would just talk myself down and pace a lot while taking deep breathes. Fukk I'm done with that ****. Can't wait to hit the gym and get back on track

[supersexystud]

Originally Posted by Beachbum1546

the main thing I want to get back is my rocking bod. I used to be stacked when my drinking was less than once a week. I think if I cut it out completely, I'll be in great shape.

When I drank hard a I actually lost weight. Lots of weight. I think I lost 30 lbs in a few months cuz I would drink a half gallon of whiskey over the course of a couple days and not really eat much. Then repeat

[superdump250]

Originally Posted by mickeylax311

I decided to quit drinking and smoking as well a few days ago. Started getting heartburn and bad panic attacks when I woke up hungover. Basically for me I would get lightheaded then this weird feeling of being really aware. Heart beat started lurching then speed up to almost 160. Never really felt too sick. Sometimes it felt hard to breathe. I would just talk myself down and pace a lot while taking deep breathes. Fukk I'm done with that ****. Can't wait to hit the gym and get back on track

yeah dude panic attacks are the ****s,

[supersexystud]

Originally Posted by mickeylax311

I decided to quit drinking and smoking as well a few days ago. Started getting heartburn and bad panic attacks when I woke up hungover. Basically for me I would get lightheaded then this weird feeling of being really aware. Heart beat started lurching then speed up to almost 160. Never really felt too sick. Sometimes it felt hard to breathe. I would just talk myself down and pace a lot while taking deep breathes. Fukk I'm done with that ****. Can't wait to hit the gym and get back on track

I think you are making a good choice. I use to get those too. The last 6 months of my drinking was all one big blurr. I didn't really know when i was hungover or not. Diarehha like 5 days a week was something i just accepted. Feeling ****ty was just feeling the average day until I drank and then I felt normal.

[Beachbum1546]

Originally Posted by supersexystud

When I drank hard a I actually lost weight. Lots of weight. I think I lost 30 lbs in a few months cuz I would drink a half gallon of whiskey over the course of a couple days and not really eat much. Then repeat

I've always been a big eater, so even when I drank I ate a lot. Last summer before I began drinking heavily I was around 230 and 9%bf. Now, I'm about 215 and 22-25% bf. I lots tons of muscle and added fat, bleh...

What I need to do is buy a cycle of roids and get back in the gym. When ever I juice, I always bring my training and diet to 100%.

[supersexystud]

I expected more questions out of this thread . Thanks for the support tho guys. I must admit i have the best friends/family in the world. They are all helping me. My friends thought i made a great choice. They saw the need long ago for a change but didn't wanna lose their drinking buddy at the same time lol. I was always the one u could call up on monday night or whatever night and I'd go drink with u. I have just about every type of story. I got in some fukd up situations through my stupidity.


Anyone go to AA? I will go to one tommorow and if not, wednesday for sure. I need to find a sponsor soon at one of them.

[PBateman]

Sub'd and rep'd for the change so far. Keep at it man, and be thankful for your sobriety.

For those that quit smoking and drinking at the same time, I would personally suggest just quitting drinking first if you have a serious drinking problem. That's the important part if it's bad, no need to make it harder. Quitting nicotine can be done later with cessation aids and possibly medication.