Is this a dude's sneaky way to avoid a girl?

[oceanic1]

Fpr 2 weeks now, I ask this guy what his week looks like, he responds and tells me what he's up to & what his specific schedule looks like (it's always super-packed but I know for a fact he's not lying)... he has like 1 free night a week to himself seirously.
he'll make comments such as "we shuld make plans soon"... but never actually makes specific plans. again I know he is absolutely ridiculously busy right now.

In the past, I've done a few things that may have made him feel friend zone'd. So is it possible he's holding back for me to make plans in order to gauge my interest?

Or has he totally written me off? I don't see why he'd respond to my texts, tell me exactly what he's doing all the time, and make vague comments about wanting to see me sometime in the future... seems like way too much work if you truly want nothing to do with a chick

[AusPower]

Either he is completely petrified of being alone with you or he doesn't see you as relationship material and is just being nice.

[oceanic1]

Either he is completely petrified of being alone with you or he doesn't see you as relationship material and is just being nice.

wellll... like i said, i may have reacted in the past in a way that made him feel "friend zoned"... but i thought maybe inviting him to my place would be a clear signal that things could go much further this time... and then he wouldnt feel rejected anymore. or maybe I shoudl be more obvious about what's gonna go on once he comes over, since before I barely let him do anything.

[Godhand502]

Fpr 2 weeks now, I ask this guy what his week looks like, he responds and tells me what he's up to & what his specific schedule looks like (it's always super-packed but I know for a fact he's not lying)... he has like 1 free night a week to himself seirously.
he'll make comments such as "we shuld make plans soon"... but never actually makes specific plans. again I know he is absolutely ridiculously busy right now.

In the past, I've done a few things that may have made him feel friend zone'd. So is it possible he's holding back for me to make plans in order to gauge my interest?

Or has he totally written me off? I don't see why he'd respond to my texts, tell me exactly what he's doing all the time, and make vague comments about wanting to see me sometime in the future... seems like way too much work if you truly want nothing to do with a chick

If you FZed him, he probably rates hanging out with you just below watching reruns of The Partridge Family. The way to change this is to let him know without a doubt that he's no longer in the FZ. Don't be vague about it. Be direct.

[oceanic1]

If you FZed him, he probably rates hanging out with you just below watching reruns of The Partridge Family. The way to change this is to let him know without a doubt that he's no longer in the FZ. Don't be vague about it. Be direct.

What I did was say that i needed things to move more slowly (sexually)

[Act Brolic]

Why don't you make a fuking specific plan with him you fukwit. When he says I have so and so day free why don't you comeup with something to do. STOP SITTING ON YOUR ASS YOU FUKING SKANK

[oceanic1]

youre right, but as u saw in my other post, i told him to come over sunday. he hasn't responded yet. i wonder if he thinks it's just gonna be awk, like i'm not going to let him bang me again. maybe i do have to be direct & basically say it's gonna be a way different kind of night this time

[Godhand502]

What I did was say that i needed things to move more slowly (sexually)

Us guys tend to respond by putting women who "need to move slowly" on the back burner while concentrating on the fast track women. The sun doesn't rise and set on whatever y'all have going. There are other women out there who are willing to be blunt and aggressive about what they want. They get preferred status because at least he knows what exactly they want. In your case, he probably doesn't have a clear idea of what you want.

[tential]

Fpr 2 weeks now, I ask this guy what his week looks like, he responds and tells me what he's up to & what his specific schedule looks like (it's always super-packed but I know for a fact he's not lying)... he has like 1 free night a week to himself seirously.
he'll make comments such as "we shuld make plans soon"... but never actually makes specific plans. again I know he is absolutely ridiculously busy right now.

In the past, I've done a few things that may have made him feel friend zone'd. So is it possible he's holding back for me to make plans in order to gauge my interest?

Or has he totally written me off? I don't see why he'd respond to my texts, tell me exactly what he's doing all the time, and make vague comments about wanting to see me sometime in the future... seems like way too much work if you truly want nothing to do with a chick

Think about this logically OP. He has a JAM packed schedule. You made him feel friendzoned. Why would he waste his PRECIOUS nights where he can go out on a girl he knows he isn't getting any from? If I was him I'd stay at home and fap or go out and hit some local DTF girls.

This thread is probably one of the more retarded ones made. Time is precious OP, you KNOW his time is precious, so why should he waste it on you? He answers your texts because ya, you're still an option but you're a low priority option who he doesn't have enough time to personally entertain. You want to be a higher priority on his list of people to hang out with? Then start being more fun or why don't you invite him out to something instead of waiting for him to make plans with you.

Edit: You invited him over. This still doesn't mean much. Girls invite dudes over a lot without doing anything remotely interesting. Just as friends. If you want his intention be flirty with him in your texts. Let him know that it's not just as friends. Obviously you're trying not to come off as a whore (even though we know all women are whores) but make him WANT to come.
Ex:
You: Hey wanna come over and watch a movie with me?
Him: What movie I don't want to watch no stupid chick flick!
You: Well then when you're over here I'm sure you can convince me of something more fun to do =p

[Godhand502]

youre right, but as u saw in my other post, i told him to come over sunday. he hasn't responded yet. i wonder if he thinks it's just gonna be awk, like i'm not going to let him bang me again. maybe i do have to be direct & basically say it's gonna be a way different kind of night this time

No, No, No. Don't go saying it like that. Go for the jugular and be blunt about it. If you say "its gonna be a way different kind of night this time" he could take it as there'll be other people there, you rented a different kind of movie this time, or you want to play board games. Just say "Movie night, my place, f*ck my brains out on the couch" (yes, this is the new female adaption of the classic RH line).

[nognig]

Think about this logically OP. He has a JAM packed schedule. You made him feel friendzoned. Why would he waste his PRECIOUS nights where he can go out on a girl he knows he isn't getting any from? If I was him I'd stay at home and fap or go out and hit some local DTF girls.

That's about it.

Guys put in effort. If a girl shuts them down, they usually don't get a second chance and by that I mean, don't expect the guy to put in ANY effort after that.

He put himself out there, now it's your turn.

NN

[oceanic1]

u guys are right. i just dont know how the hell to say it without looking like i did a total 180 from last time i saw him... but ht ehonest truth is just that i cant stop thinking about how much i want to finish what we started, i may have my usual principles but those go flying out window when i think of him

[IronRingGymnast]

u guys are right. i just dont know how the hell to say it without looking like i did a total 180 from last time i saw him... but ht ehonest truth is just that i cant stop thinking about how much i want to finish what we started, i may have my usual principles but those go flying out window when i think of him

Age: 31

[oceanic1]

Age: 31

i changed my birth year to protect privacy, i always do that on computerized stuff it's a scary world i'm early 20's

[oceanic1]

this might be the most awkward text i ever send to anyone in my life... help.. Ha

[Chrome Face]

Listen up...

If a guy has game, we prioritize our girls. We rank them in order of how hot they are and how fun they are to be around (mostly how hot they are though...). Sometimes we get real busy and don't give a fock about women. If this is the case... we only spend time with the hottest ones. You may have been one of the non-hot ones that was written off.

[oceanic1]

Listen, I'm not full of myself. But based upon honest feedback accumulated over 22 years of my life... I AM one of the very hot ones.

That may be the ONLY reason this guy is even still telling me everything he's up to, and hinting that we should get together "sometime," at this point.

[gatovolador]

Maybe he is just being polite and doesn't want to hang out?

Or you could just tell him since he's so busy let you take him out for drinks one night to relax.

[oceanic1]

It's not like we talked daily even before this little "rejection" thing... & he never made advance plans w/me for dates. More like, gets home from bar and texts me to come over late. that was why i didn't do more w/him sexually that time - cuz i felt like some cheap backup plan that nite, not like his "date."

but i shouldn't make him sound like a total douche...he is super busy... and he did do some "romantic" stuff one time I saw him

[Chrome Face]

Listen, I'm not full of myself. But based upon honest feedback accumulated over 22 years of my life... I AM one of the very hot ones.

That may be the ONLY reason this guy is even still telling me everything he's up to, and hinting that we should get together "sometime," at this point.

Explain the stuff you did before that may have FZ'd him?? Did he try to kiss you and you shut him down. What sort of focked up stuff did you pull??

Guys don't throw hot girls on the back burner for no reason. You may not have sex appeal or have "female game". Does he try to initiate touching and you shy away??

[oceanic1]

i came over his place, was excited at first, then realized it kinda sucked to feel like a cheap "backup plan" after the bars closed. i mean, it sucks if u actually wanted to date the guy & not just have casual sex, which was the case for me. I thought that if he wanted a potential relationship w/me, then he would've come up with better crap than what he did that night, and eventually it sorta turned me off that he didn't care to impress me any more than that.

as soon as we started making out, i told him up front that there wasn't gonna be more going down that night, that it was "too soon." why didn't i want more? well after i got there, i realized i wasn't feeling being the cheap "backup plan." Told him right away -- it's not like i went to his bedroom, took off some clothes, then told him nothing was happening. obv he wanted to make out forever even after i said that stuff.

[beaucephus]

i came over his place, was excited at first, then realized it kinda sucked to feel like a cheap "backup plan" after the bars closed & the dude was still kinda drunk when i arrived. i mean, it sucks if u actually wanted to date the guy & not just have casual sex, which was the case for me. I thought that if he wanted a potential relationship w/me, then he would've come up with better crap than what he did that night, and eventually it sorta turned me off that he didn't care to impress me any more than that.

as soon as we started making out, i told him up front that there wasn't gonna be more going down that night, that it was "too soon." why didn't i want more? well after i got there, i realized i wasn't feeling being the cheap "backup plan" after the bars closed.

young girls are so fukking stupid im in shock at how these guys on here cant get laid.

youre this guys backup plan. you realize it. you realize that even after you give it up to him your chances of a relationship are slim at best. he has time to hit up the bars but not hit you up. he has time for friends but he doesnt have time for you... but you think letting him blow his load on your naked body will somehow change the dynamic of your relationship...

i laugh when girls cry over guys that fukk them over. not only that i usually do it while texting the next one on my list to come over at 2am.

good luck with your happiness goals for 2010!

[IronRingGymnast]

Listen, I'm not full of myself. But based upon honest feedback accumulated over 22 years of my life... I AM one of the very hot ones.

That may be the ONLY reason this guy is even still telling me everything he's up to, and hinting that we should get together "sometime," at this point.

based on whos feedback?

a white knight? lulz

most white knights will call ANY woman a heavenly blessed beauty





just another woman with an grandeur sense of entitlement who thinks she is a 10/10. the type that puts Body Type: Average on PoF when she is 220lbs+ or the woman who says that her "curves" are her beauty.

nothing to see here folks

[oceanic1]

So it's bull**** for me to think that he went out to the bars for an hour, realized "oh I'd really rather spend my time with that one girl," & then call me up? I wondered if it was supposed to be "flattering."
Maybe the dude was just nervous about sleeping w/me for first time and once he got some booze in him he loosened up and thought he'd give it a try. I mean he'd definitely been "romantic" towards me once before, & we had great conversations.

[IronRingGymnast]

So it's bull**** for me to think that he went out to the bars for an hour, realized "oh I'd really rather spend my time with that one girl," & then call me up? I wondered if it was supposed to be "flattering."
Maybe the dude was just nervous about sleeping w/me for first time and once he got some booze in him he loosened up and thought he'd give it a try. I mean he'd definitely been "romantic" towards me once before, & we had great conversations.

lol

sure, keep justifying his actions. keep being a wishful optimist and hope that somehow this is going to turn out for the better and he will have a change of heart and become your knight in shining armor.

beaucephus gave the best post in this thread, but you know and everyone else in this thread knows you are just going to ignore it.

good luck with your typical woman getting plowed by a jackass goals for 1942

[oceanic1]

I know you guys are 99% likely to be right. But there's always that 1 dude who's just worried about being rejected, gets some booze in him & feels "braver." So I cockblocked that guy that night... because I wasn't feeling the whole "being-used-only-for-sex" idea. But maybe he didn't see it that way. I'm telling u, he really acted like he liked me before that night. didn't even freakin kiss me the first time we went out. and we finished that "late night" by him wanting to cuddle for ever, even though he was not trying anything else in the sex dept by that point. i kept offering to leave, the dude just wanted to hold me, not in a sex way.

If he was a good guy, & now he feels sexually rejected bc i didn't give it up when he called me over after the bars late at night... then i feel like i should give him another shot at hitting it, show him that i am interested sexually

i might as well just come on to him, take the risk of being used for sex. at least i'll have my answer. but if he's a "good guy" who feels like he got friend-zoned after that night... then he may not even respond to me coming onto him at this point anyhow, bc he's so turned off that i freakin went to first base and that was it.

[oceanic1]

............

[jack90]

i dont see anything sneaky about this lmao. he is actively not making time to hang out.

it sucks, but you can **** up pretty irreparably fairly easy early on in the dating stages.

[Godhand502]

I know you guys are 99% likely to be right. But there's always that 1 dude who's just worried about being rejected, gets some booze in him & feels "braver." So I cockblocked that guy that night... because I wasn't feeling the whole "being-used-only-for-sex" idea. But maybe he didn't see it that way. I'm telling u, he really acted like he liked me before that night. didn't even freakin kiss me the first time we went out. and we finished that "late night" by him wanting to cuddle for ever, even though he was not trying anything else in the sex dept by that point. i kept offering to leave, the dude just wanted to hold me, not in a sex way.

If he was a good guy, & now he feels sexually rejected bc i didn't give it up when he called me over after the bars late at night... then i feel like i should give him another shot at hitting it, show him that i am interested sexually

i might as well just come on to him, take the risk of being used for sex. at least i'll have my answer. but if he's a "good guy" who feels like he got friend-zoned after that night... then he may not even respond to me coming onto him at this point anyhow, bc he's so turned off that i freakin went to first base and that was it.

[RCAK]

I know you guys are 99% likely to be right. But there's always that 1 dude who's just worried about being rejected, gets some booze in him & feels "braver." So I cockblocked that guy that night... because I wasn't feeling the whole "being-used-only-for-sex" idea. But maybe he didn't see it that way. I'm telling u, he really acted like he liked me before that night. didn't even freakin kiss me the first time we went out. and we finished that "late night" by him wanting to cuddle for ever, even though he was not trying anything else in the sex dept by that point. i kept offering to leave, the dude just wanted to hold me, not in a sex way.

If he was a good guy, & now he feels sexually rejected bc i didn't give it up when he called me over after the bars late at night... then i feel like i should give him another shot at hitting it, show him that i am interested sexually

i might as well just come on to him, take the risk of being used for sex. at least i'll have my answer. but if he's a "good guy" who feels like he got friend-zoned after that night... then he may not even respond to me coming onto him at this point anyhow, bc he's so turned off that i freakin went to first base and that was it.

Oh god I wouldn't dream figuring out what goes on in your head during the day. Seriously mind= blown.