i decided to try to lose a little fat. i wasn't keeping too close a calorie count over past few months, so by using the calculators online, it said i should be doing about 900-1100 cals for fat loss. i'm only 4'11" but that seems, umm, crazy. my weight's about 104-106 and i have a decent amount of muscle. but i've put on a fair amount of fat over the first year of grad school, which is annoying cause i got it quite low for your average desk to gym girl (maybe ~18%ish) when i was less horribly stressed out. basically i delt with the stress of working and school full time by eating. WTF, me!?! why!!!
anyway, i've been doing about 1550-1650, but i've binged hard for the past two days. i weight train hard 2x a week with a trainer, and then other random forms of cardio most other days, some light, some harder intervals, or other "toning" classes at school like pilates, and i try to get in the rock gym when i can. i wonder if this is too low for my activity level and after a week or so, my body just says, "face shovel time!" and off goes a binge.
i've been trying got keep it mostly clean, get in more protein than i usually do, try to cut out most sugar save fruit and dairy. i picked 40/30/30 after some reading, mostly lou schuler & cassandra forsythe's info. i have a history of ED, both undereating and binging. and i'm scared of going too low and getting caught in the viscious cycle again. i know i need to deal with the psychological side of the binging...
but is there any advice for the psysiological side? any clue as to what my cal intake should be? i'm having a hard time keeping to a base line to know where i gain and where i lose.
ugh, why do we do this to ourselves? i know too many ladies with ED yelling at them. i thought i was past mine. guess the past 6 months of stress eating and now beating myself up, and binging when i'm trying to do good for myself (assuming i'm eating enough to sustain that is), says i still have miles to go.
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