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  1. #1
    Registered User dbluevette's Avatar
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    My wife has been gone one year this month(serious)

    She passed away last year of breast cancer. Our two small childeren are doing wonderful. I on the other hand, its hit or miss ya know? Just thought i'd share. (serious)
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  2. #2
    Registered User flabtoabs's Avatar
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    thats harsh bro!
    focus on the kids now and lift and eventually somebody will fall into the empty spot.
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  3. #3
    Registered User TruStinger's Avatar
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    Damn dude, im sorry. I dont know how I would deal with that.
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  4. #4
    Registered User chimpy's Avatar
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    Have you taken a vacation? I don't mean to sound harsh, but if might really help you if you can have your parents/wife's parents take the kids for a week and use the time to take a week off. Get away and clear your head, grab some perspective and then come back refueled ready to raise your kids and be everything to them.

    Its all about stress management, we all are terrible at it. I know I am. We gotta just play the hand we are dealt. God bless ya brother, hang in there.
    Make Yourself
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  5. #5
    Jersey Troll Punisher1012's Avatar
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    damn I cant even imagine losing my wife like that. that would be my worst nightmare
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  6. #6
    Registered User AriesUnleashed's Avatar
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    Sorry man, I can relate. My Mom died in 2004 of cancer and it still tears me up. She was the best person I've ever known. She never once complained about it and she just wanted to make sure that we would all be ok. I have four brothers and she wanted us to all grow up happy and her biggest concern the whole time was us boys. She was fantastic. Hang in there, it really does get better with time. Eventually you will be able to look back and just think of the happy times and it will bring joy to you but I know its hard now. Still is for me 4 years later. Her birthday was yesterday so that was really hard for me as well, but like I said, hang in there because it does get better. How old are your kids if you don't mind me asking?
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  7. #7
    Registered User angelfire2005's Avatar
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    so sorry to hear bro. she lives everyday through your children though
    hiya
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  8. #8
    Registered User hrd's Avatar
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    It's great the kids are coping well, I can't imagine how you feel.
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  9. #9
    mod negged vparty's Avatar
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    i lost my mom to stomach cancer when i was 15..
    only time i've ever seen him cry. it's been almost 7 years now and he has a gf and is doin awesome..

    sorry to hear though. definitely sucks
    "One morning I woke up and found my favorite pigeon, Julius, had died. I was devastated and was gonna use his crate as my stickball bat to honor him. I left the crate on my stoop and went in to get something and I returned to see the sanitation man put the crate into the crusher. I rushed him and caught him flush on the temple with a titanic right hand he was out cold, convulsing on the floor like a infantile retard." - Mike Tyson
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  10. #10
    Registered User & Abuser Magnumtripod's Avatar
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    i have known a lot of people who have had and/or died from cancer, but never anyone super close to me (like an immediate family member or close friend). It's hard to imagine ever having to go through something like that with someone so close. Stay strong man and good luck in the future.

    p.s. i hate cancer
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  11. #11
    Registered User fecalpheliac's Avatar
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    I lost my dad in october to pancreatic cancer. I think I need to get away myself, take a week off. Hopped right back into work, kind of paying for it now. Need to clear my head a bit
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  12. #12
    i love eggs GoutDeMiel's Avatar
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    holy **** - the RH has a heart???? strong wow! makes me all warm and fuzzy inside!

    Anyways - OP, I've lost a lot of close family members and friends to all sorts of different things - I always tell myself that god picks the prettiest flowers and it always makes me feel better.
    domari nolo
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  13. #13
    Registered User kindersuprize's Avatar
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    i feel for you

    I understand what you are going through. my father had bladder tumors which the doctor said turned out to be cancerous. He had surgery and after his first check up three months later, the doctor didnt find it. I am tearing up reading your post because i dont wanna lose him. I feel for you.
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  14. #14
    Truth fears no questions FlexinMike's Avatar
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    That sucks man.Almost lost my wife last year from GBS.She was just a few hours from her respiration failure when I took her to Nashville and we lived 2 hours from the hospital at the time.
    I thought I was strong till I watched my wife fight through GBS.I could only dream to have as much strength and will power as her!

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  15. #15
    Registered User dbluevette's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by AriesUnleashed View Post
    Sorry man, I can relate. My Mom died in 2004 of cancer and it still tears me up. She was the best person I've ever known. She never once complained about it and she just wanted to make sure that we would all be ok. I have four brothers and she wanted us to all grow up happy and her biggest concern the whole time was us boys. She was fantastic. Hang in there, it really does get better with time. Eventually you will be able to look back and just think of the happy times and it will bring joy to you but I know its hard now. Still is for me 4 years later. Her birthday was yesterday so that was really hard for me as well, but like I said, hang in there because it does get better. How old are your kids if you don't mind me asking?

    Your mom reminds me of my wife. She never wanted anything for herself. Only for her family. Strong women indeed.
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  16. #16
    Registered User nightrain36's Avatar
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    my mother has been battling cancer. Breast cancer over a year ago which she finished. But she just got called in for some blood work, possibly some liver thing. I don't know what to do. It's tough realizing that you might lose your mother. I love her to death and don't know what my family would do without her. I tried negotiating with God and crying. Her job is tough right now, as is everyone's but it's just like "people give the woman a break. she's going through tough **** and she's a wonderful wife and mother."

    I just wish I could somehow take all of her pain away. Like, God make me hurt. Leave her alone.
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  17. #17
    Never pet a burning dog. fukc's Avatar
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    My best friend lost her mom to cancer two years ago. It's so scary.

    It's wonderful that your children are doing well though.
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  18. #18
    Registered User dbluevette's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by chimpy View Post
    Have you taken a vacation? I don't mean to sound harsh, but if might really help you if you can have your parents/wife's parents take the kids for a week and use the time to take a week off. Get away and clear your head, grab some perspective and then come back refueled ready to raise your kids and be everything to them.

    Its all about stress management, we all are terrible at it. I know I am. We gotta just play the hand we are dealt. God bless ya brother, hang in there.


    A vacation would prolly do me a lot of good. I've been told that I must take care of myself in order to be able to take care of my babies. I live my life with my two childeren as my main
    focus and drive. That will never change.
    Last edited by dbluevette; 02-19-2009 at 10:21 PM.
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  19. #19
    Registered User dbluevette's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by angelfire2005 View Post
    so sorry to hear bro. she lives everyday through your children though
    That is very true.
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  20. #20
    Registered User newlyminted's Avatar
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    That's tough,man. A friend of mine lost her husband about 3 years ago now and she was left to raise their baby alone. The baby was only 2 at the time and it's a struggle everyday, but what seems to help her the most is having a strong support system to help out. Friends, relatives, it doesn't matter as long as you have people who care around you you will be okay.

    While your wife is no longer with you she blessed you with two miracles before she passed away so every day that you are with your kids a piece of your wife is there too.
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  21. #21
    Registered User Nikolay728's Avatar
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    I'm sorry to hear that man; Just remember that she would want you to be happy and raise the kids as best you can.
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  22. #22
    Registered User dbluevette's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by nightrain36 View Post
    my mother has been battling cancer. Breast cancer over a year ago which she finished. But she just got called in for some blood work, possibly some liver thing. I don't know what to do. It's tough realizing that you might lose your mother. I love her to death and don't know what my family would do without her. I tried negotiating with God and crying. Her job is tough right now, as is everyone's but it's just like "people give the woman a break. she's going through tough **** and she's a wonderful wife and mother."

    I just wish I could somehow take all of her pain away. Like, God make me hurt. Leave her alone.

    I know exactly what you mean. My wife battled it for 2 years before passing away. Every day I wished it was me instead of her.
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  23. #23
    Registered User TarheelMak's Avatar
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    wow bro I it hurts to even think about that kind of thing happening. GJDM on you sticking there and raising your kids. real men FTW
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  24. #24
    Registered User dbluevette's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by FlexinMike View Post
    That sucks man.Almost lost my wife last year from GBS.She was just a few hours from her respiration failure when I took her to Nashville and we lived 2 hours from the hospital at the time.

    Yeah that's when things get very scary. That's about the time your whole world gets shaken.
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  25. #25
    Registered User dbluevette's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by vparty View Post
    i lost my mom to stomach cancer when i was 15..
    only time i've ever seen him cry. it's been almost 7 years now and he has a gf and is doin awesome..

    sorry to hear though. definitely sucks
    Thanks u brah. That's great to hear.
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  26. #26
    Registered User dbluevette's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by TarheelMak View Post
    wow bro I it hurts to even think about that kind of thing happening. GJDM on you sticking there and raising your kids. real men FTW
    Thank u brah! My kids are my world.
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  27. #27
    Registered User dbluevette's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Nikolay728 View Post
    I'm sorry to hear that man; Just remember that she would want you to be happy and raise the kids as best you can.
    You're exactly right. That's what keeps me going.
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  28. #28
    U mad bro? svrocket's Avatar
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    That's rough man, take care of the kids because they need you too. Beware trying to dwell in old memories everyday for the rest of your life. You can always love your wife inside your own heart, but maybe one day you'll want someone to comfort you, and be step-mom for the kids. Your wife would understand. Later.
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  29. #29
    Registered User dbluevette's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by kindersuprize View Post
    I understand what you are going through. my father had bladder tumors which the doctor said turned out to be cancerous. He had surgery and after his first check up three months later, the doctor didnt find it. I am tearing up reading your post because i dont wanna lose him. I feel for you.

    Just be there for him in any way you can brah. I hope everything goes well for y'all.
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  30. #30
    Registered User dbluevette's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by newlyminted View Post
    That's tough,man. A friend of mine lost her husband about 3 years ago now and she was left to raise their baby alone. The baby was only 2 at the time and it's a struggle everyday, but what seems to help her the most is having a strong support system to help out. Friends, relatives, it doesn't matter as long as you have people who care around you you will be okay.

    While your wife is no longer with you she blessed you with two miracles before she passed away so every day that you are with your kids a piece of your wife is there too.

    I couldn't do this without my great family and friends that's for sure! I see her in our childeren everyday.
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