31 year old virgin the quest continues

**tubenoob** · 02-16-2009, 06:06 AM

I have still not reached my goal however I am still determined!

A brief history of me. I was the fat shy dork that got picked on,I quit school asap,worked construction most of my life and basicly became a boarderline hermit.

What got me started on this quest: A friend years ago said I was missing out on alot in life and this stuck with me. I lost alot of weight and it has improved my life I am now trying to improve other aspects of my life. The show the pick up artist has also been a great motivator. I've realized that I used video games to sub for human interaction and it isn't healthy. Pets gave me the affection that I needed to get from people(not sex you pervs) this isn't healthy. I feel that dating and sex is a part of growing up and I need to do this to be on "even ground" with others.

My dating past. When I was 16 I went out on a blind date,wentout a few more times,got dumped before anything went anywhere. At 20 or 21 went out on a semiblind date,I felt no attraction and everyone was up my ass about the details. If you want more info it's in the old thread.

What I have done so far. I talk to cashiers,hairdressers and have reconnected with old friends. Went to strip clubs and got used to being touched. Tried pua in clubs and bars with no positive outcome. Ran profiles on online dating sites. New job so now I am interacting with people daily. I have now thrown away pua,thrown away friends advise and am now trying to crash and learn. This has been more effective. I have been at this off and on for about a year.
If you want more info on the pua attempts and online adventures it's in the old thread.

Rules I'd like to follow, mind you I will loosen up on these as I continue.

The girl cannot be married to my knowledge,no women with kids unless it is a nsa sex agreement upfront. (I am not out to hurt others)

No lying on my part. Loop holes to this,completements and half truths but I am doing my best not to lie to people.

I have to find them somewhat attractive.

I am not going to become an ******* to score ass! (my most firm rule)

she cannot weigh more then me (ok I'll be breaking this one lol)

I cannot know that she is a whore before hand.

Hooker is a last resort,before then end of 09 I will resort to this or if I lose my determination.

My goal is to simply get laid,while I would prefer to have a relationship it isn't realistic with my lack of exp and my age. If I when them over with my personality or my looks it doesn't matter. I have earned both.

One of my best adventures coming soon!

**Reincarnation** · 02-16-2009, 06:24 AM

Good luck man, i really like your spirit man. Just remember you will experience a lot of UPs and DOWNs during this journey, so perservere it and reap the biggest rewards.

**Heavensport** · 02-16-2009, 06:30 AM

Go to a bar and talk to a fat chick.

**7Happy7** · 02-16-2009, 06:39 AM

you're from Texas. it shouldnt be a problem everyone is super friendly

**MissThing** · 02-16-2009, 06:48 AM

I feel you OP, I was the awkward geek who never got far with men. I had crushes but never acyed on them. then I got into some bad short term-relationships where men only wanted to go out with a girl with fat ass. They didn't actually like me for ME.

then I got really fat and unattractive.

Now I'm 30 and ready to have fun with guys, in fact it looks lijke I might have found one recently. This could be the year for both of us, lol!

Good luck

**Mr Bounce** · 02-16-2009, 07:01 AM

You already have the mindset that many could only dream of! IMO, just continue pushing yourself every day to talk to people and women more and more. If you just wanted to lose your virginity you could go to a bar at 2am and find a fat girl, but I think that you want more than that?
If you want the opposite of what you currently have, then do the opposite. Be outgoing, experimental, and take chances when it comes to people. If you keep a positive outlook, you will inevitably get what you want.

**tts0lid** · 02-16-2009, 07:22 AM

Sounds like you have the right mindset. One thing I'd like to add as far as your "be completely honest" rule is concerned:

Be completely honest with your intent as well. What I'm saying is, if you are interested in the girl, CONVEY that you are interested in the girl. I don't know if it's an issue for you, but don't be afraid and act non-sexual if you are really into her. Let her know you are into her. Be honest and upfront about it. (Maybe not in words, but certainly in body language and attitude). It fits in with your rules and there is nothing wrong with it...

good luck...

just crash and burn over and over, and you'll figure it out in no time at all. every interaction teaches you somethhing...

**7Happy7** · 02-16-2009, 07:37 AM

since you'e 31 why not try some testosterone boosters. They DO boost the hell out of your confidence and give you alpha male mentality.

**khergan** · 02-16-2009, 07:42 AM

Dude, seriously. I'm not going to make fun of you, but give you some easy truths:

1) When you start trying to do the social thing with women, you will initially fail. "Game", "Social Ability" or whatever you want to call it is just that, a game. And most games you start out with you suck at until you practice and get better. So expect rejection, don't be afraid of failure and be willing to learn.

2) You aren't the first nor the last person to be 31 with no experience. You are not the norm persay, but you're not a demon growing horns.

3) Lastly, and trust me this one, it's not as hard as you mind makes it out to be. Women are not special mythical creatures, and despite cool guy advice to virgins that it's something special, it's not. Don't put the pussy on a pedestal, remember these are people just like you, and have a good time. Don't let your inhibitions and weird thoughts on it carry you, just be yourself, be natural and let it flow.

You'll succeed if you put your mind to it. But don't be like some of these older virgins that make one half-assed attempt at dating/sex and fail, then convince themselves that they're screwed. You probably didn't do very well at the first game of basketball you played. But you got better after awhile and started winning, right? Same thing.

**Messiahtype** · 02-16-2009, 08:42 AM

Go into bars bone sober an hour before last call. Put your arm around drunkest girl. Make a few jokes. Win.

**sc30317** · 02-16-2009, 08:42 AM

You got this homie, just be positive!

**PopeGregorius** · 02-16-2009, 08:44 AM

Originally Posted by tubenoob

I New job so now I am interacting with people daily. I have now thrown away pua,thrown away friends advise and am now trying to crash and learn. This has been more effective. I have been at this off and on for about a year.
If you want more info on the pua attempts and online adventures it's in the old thread.

At least 50% of my friends met their girl at work or at college.
You can "pre-qualify" chicks you are around all day. Dont be afraid asking them out.

**BBingGuru** · 02-16-2009, 08:50 AM

I give you props for not tripping out and taking your life. haha.
Good luck

**muhuwahaha** · 02-16-2009, 09:20 AM

OP how tall are you? just wondering

**slowteg** · 02-16-2009, 10:10 AM

31 is the new 21.

IMO do not try any of the PUA bull****, just act yourself.

go up to a girl at a bar/club/whatever in a nonthreatening way introduce yourself, then ask her her name.

in before your 19

**injured44** · 02-16-2009, 10:33 AM

once you hit 30 you might as well chalk it up as never gonna happen

why make a topic about it ???

**Loochi** · 02-16-2009, 12:17 PM

You'll get there op! Best of luck.

**Fozzy13** · 02-16-2009, 12:53 PM

i dont understand....i know why I'M a virgin but you seem to look decent so getting laid shouldnt be a prob. Growing up i was obese up until about 21ish, then i lost weight but now have saggy skin and **** and so my insecurity gets to me but i know i wouldnt be one if i looked normal.

Best of luck to you AND me good sir.

**who_mike_jones** · 02-16-2009, 12:57 PM

get a hooker now. seriously...

you should have gotten one at 22 (if u werent laid by then)

**brianphi** · 02-16-2009, 01:31 PM

get a hooker... after that maybe it will all come easier to you as it won't be some magical kingdom and you won't be so pre-occupied with it.

getting laid is not hard, finding a worthy relationship is.

**tubenoob** · 02-17-2009, 05:21 PM

Wow Thanks for the encouragement! Someone asked my height 5foot 9 and a half inchees bare foot. And I used to weigh 269 pounds!

**Sim187** · 02-17-2009, 05:40 PM

Originally Posted by JPA1384

i dont understand....i know why I'M a virgin but you seem to look decent so getting laid shouldnt be a prob. Growing up i was obese up until about 21ish, then i lost weight but now have saggy skin and **** and so my insecurity gets to me but i know i wouldnt be one if i looked normal.

Best of luck to you AND me good sir.

save up for surgergy, don't let **** like that affect your everyday life

**matt2301** · 02-17-2009, 05:48 PM

The biggest thing IMO is to not fear rejection. just act like you don't give a damn if you get laid or not and it seems to just...happen. It's when you get all nervous that things start to go wrong...usually

Overall just keep your head up, you have great motivation especially with losing all that weight, good job brah

**tubenoob** · 02-17-2009, 05:51 PM

A bit about her. Her job is taking care of the less fortunet,she also rescues animals and donates to the homeless.(no joke) She dresses like a school teacher. Approx 130pounds 5foot 3inches I rank her a 6 on a 1-10 age 27. I will be calling her Ariel.

I met Ariel from an online dating site,We joked on IM but it we cept missing eachothers Messages so we exchanged numbers. We talked awhile on the phone and set up a date to go bowling,we also agreed to call eachother whenever we wanted,no games.

Next time we talked she mentioned making it a double with her best friend(lesbian) and her date. I said ok if you need a bodyguard it's just I will be meeting 3 new people and won't have anyone I really know with me. She hadn't thought about that.

I got a good idea and decided to run it by her. Not a date we just meet at the mall eat lunch and do some shopping. She loves this idea.
We meet at the mall at the same time and hug in the parking lot. In minutes we are both all smiles and chatting away. 2hours of good convo later I walk her to her car,we hug and I tell her I will call her tomarrow. Ariel says you can call me tonight!

I do see some potential issues. Skin blemishes,a few marks on her face and small red dots below her neck. She started to bring up her past but then said she used to be very unhealthy and didn't want to say anything further.
I know she has become the goody goody to make up for her past rather she admits it or not. I don't care my past or lack there of is prob just as bad.

**Loochi** · 02-17-2009, 06:06 PM

Originally Posted by tubenoob

A bit about her. Her job is taking care of the less fortunet,she also rescues animals and donates to the homeless.(no joke) She dresses like a school teacher. Approx 130pounds 5foot 3inches I rank her a 6 on a 1-10 age 27. I will be calling her Ariel.

I met Ariel from an online dating site,We joked on IM but it we cept missing eachothers Messages so we exchanged numbers. We talked awhile on the phone and set up a date to go bowling,we also agreed to call eachother whenever we wanted,no games.

Next time we talked she mentioned making it a double with her best friend(lesbian) and her date. I said ok if you need a bodyguard it's just I will be meeting 3 new people and won't have anyone I really know with me. She hadn't thought about that.

I got a good idea and decided to run it by her. Not a date we just meet at the mall eat lunch and do some shopping. She loves this idea.
We meet at the mall at the same time and hug in the parking lot. In minutes we are both all smiles and chatting away. 2hours of good convo later I walk her to her car,we hug and I tell her I will call her tomarrow. Ariel says you can call me tonight!

I do see some potential issues. Skin blemishes,a few marks on her face and small red dots below her neck. She started to bring up her past but then said she used to be very unhealthy and didn't want to say anything further.
I know she has become the goody goody to make up for her past rather she admits it or not. I don't care my past or lack there of is prob just as bad.

Lol at the potential issues.. Who are you to judge man? Don't tell me you're gonna back out because of this..

**Kanji4488** · 02-17-2009, 06:11 PM

Originally Posted by Messiahtype

Go into bars bone sober an hour before last call. Put your arm around drunkest girl. Make a few jokes. Win.

best advice ever. pm me to rep u, im on recharge.

**Cimeries** · 02-17-2009, 06:18 PM

www.seductiongr.com, http://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/ and http://www.rsdnation.com/forum . They've help me out maybe they could do the same for you.

**injured44** · 02-17-2009, 07:07 PM

Originally Posted by tubenoob

A bit about her. Her job is taking care of the less fortunet,she also rescues animals and donates to the homeless.(no joke) She dresses like a school teacher. Approx 130pounds 5foot 3inches I rank her a 6 on a 1-10 age 27. I will be calling her Ariel.

I met Ariel from an online dating site,We joked on IM but it we cept missing eachothers Messages so we exchanged numbers. We talked awhile on the phone and set up a date to go bowling,we also agreed to call eachother whenever we wanted,no games.

Next time we talked she mentioned making it a double with her best friend(lesbian) and her date. I said ok if you need a bodyguard it's just I will be meeting 3 new people and won't have anyone I really know with me. She hadn't thought about that.

I got a good idea and decided to run it by her. Not a date we just meet at the mall eat lunch and do some shopping. She loves this idea.
We meet at the mall at the same time and hug in the parking lot. In minutes we are both all smiles and chatting away. 2hours of good convo later I walk her to her car,we hug and I tell her I will call her tomarrow. Ariel says you can call me tonight!

I do see some potential issues. Skin blemishes,a few marks on her face and small red dots below her neck. She started to bring up her past but then said she used to be very unhealthy and didn't want to say anything further.
I know she has become the goody goody to make up for her past rather she admits it or not. I don't care my past or lack there of is prob just as bad.

you cant be fukin serious LOL

good troll job or real douchebag

**Loochi** · 02-17-2009, 07:09 PM

Originally Posted by injured44

you cant be fukin serious LOL

good troll job or real douchebag

That's what I said bro' lol. Far out.... Talk about E standards lol.

**the_mac_attack** · 02-17-2009, 07:15 PM

Originally Posted by Loochi

That's what I said bro' lol. Far out.... Talk about E standards lol.

x2

Beggars can't be choosers, mate! LMAO...

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