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  1. #4681
    I grunt pharmamarketer's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by cowboybiker View Post
    I tell my sponsees no dating for a year and if they dont like it there are other sponsers.
    Not trying to be rude, but Im not an MFT.
    Besides, One broken person plus another broken person equals a train wreck.
    I have tried it before and it seems that they're more concerned with what she has to say about his recovery than taking any guidance from me.
    My sponsor told me no dating for a year, and I listened. And I also justified that sex was not dating.
    I keep in mind that not all respond to the 12 steps the same. Some need to mature more than others.
    I feel that trying to fill that void with a relationship is just not the right way to go.
    I agree CB. I have seen it hurt more than help. It can become a crutch that does not/should not be there
    I'm a great believer in luck and I find the harder I work, the more I have of it. ~ Thomas Jefferson
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  2. #4682
    Monsta Big_Sky_Guy's Avatar
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    sf94- glad you made the decision to not start again. You won't regret it.
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  3. #4683
    Progress not Perfection cowboybiker's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by BOZZ View Post
    Well the thing is that he'll have 3 years in 2 months and she will next month. They're about 45 days apart with their sobriety dates. I think right now he's trying to figure out how to break things off with her tactfully. I haven't came out and asked him because I want him to figure it out on his own. This is his first go at a relationship sober, so I'm not about to deprive him of the growth that will come from whatever comes of this.
    Relationships dont end well.
    If they did, they wouldnt end.
    But you are right about one thing.
    There will be alot of growth from it.
    The whole "That which does not kill us" thing.
    Good luck. I dont envy you on this.
    Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude. – Thomas Jefferson


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  4. #4684
    Riding 2 horses w/1 butt JRT6's Avatar
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    I'm having elbow surgery in two weeks. Pain meds are going to be problematic. Wife says I have to learn to use my left hand. I need a break.
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  5. #4685
    Progress not Perfection cowboybiker's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by JRT6 View Post
    I'm having elbow surgery in two weeks. Pain meds are going to be problematic. Wife says I have to learn to use my left hand. I need a break.
    I broke a rib and my leg while in recovery. Not at the same time. But yea, It can be a problem. If you allow it to be.
    Or you can take the oppurtunity to strengthen your program. Hit more meetings, Find some serenity.
    Hope all the best for you.
    Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude. – Thomas Jefferson


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  6. #4686
    Damn, it's good to be me! thepowerwithin's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by JRT6 View Post
    I'm having elbow surgery in two weeks. Pain meds are going to be problematic. Wife says I have to learn to use my left hand. I need a break.
    Opiates are my drug of choice, so I have to be very careful. This is what I relapsed on after 10+ years of sobriety. It started with a toothache and my general unhappiness of the state of my marriage.

    Now, if I ever need pain meds, they will be in someone's possession to be dispensed to me. Yes, I am that scared.
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  7. #4687
    Registered User Mk35's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by thepowerwithin View Post
    Opiates are my drug of choice, so I have to be very careful. This is what I relapsed on after 10+ years of sobriety. It started with a toothache and my general unhappiness of the state of my marriage.

    Now, if I ever need pain meds, they will be in someone's possession to be dispensed to me. Yes, I am that scared.

    I know this feeling.... Those are my drug of choice too. Didn't realize how mixed up I could get w/ them until after I quit drinking.
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  8. #4688
    Damn, it's good to be me! thepowerwithin's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Mk35 View Post
    I know this feeling.... Those are my drug of choice too. Didn't realize how mixed up I could get w/ them until after I quit drinking.
    Me too. My first go round, the white powder got me. The second go round, it was opiates. The third go round, alcohol. Now, it's lifting .

    I think I finally got it. Switching doesn't work.
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  9. #4689
    Monsta Big_Sky_Guy's Avatar
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    We are such slow learners!
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  10. #4690
    Homegrown Texas Boy! sfuller94's Avatar
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    We're supposed to be getting smarter as we age. At least that's what I keep telling my son.
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  11. #4691
    Riding 2 horses w/1 butt JRT6's Avatar
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    It's not so much that I fear I will become addicted to the pain pills it's that I don't want to go through the whole withdrawl ordeal. Opiates are the hardest addiction to break next to meth.
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  12. #4692
    **S U P E R B E A S T** Meatpants's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by JRT6 View Post
    It's not so much that I fear I will become addicted to the pain pills it's that I don't want to go through the whole withdrawl ordeal. Opiates are the hardest addiction to break next to meth.
    I stay afraid. It helps me stay sober. Respect and fear, they just go together.
    To whom much is given, much is expected.

    Victory is reserved for those willing to pay its price.
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  13. #4693
    I grunt pharmamarketer's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Meatpants View Post
    I stay afraid. It helps me stay sober. Respect and fear, they just go together.
    Fear helps me too
    I'm a great believer in luck and I find the harder I work, the more I have of it. ~ Thomas Jefferson
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  14. #4694
    Riding 2 horses w/1 butt JRT6's Avatar
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    Doctor's nurse told me i'd better show up to the surgery sober. Geeze I got a rep.
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  15. #4695
    Monsta Big_Sky_Guy's Avatar
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    The beauty is when we stay sober and clean up the messes we've created, we will have a new reputation!

    Prayers that your surgery and recovery go well.
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  16. #4696
    meow dogetta's Avatar
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    7 yrs clean and sober today!! from opiates and alcohol YAY!!! To JR I had surgery for a torn labrum and scared.Have your surgeon or anesthesiologist consult a Addictionist who can recommend post op pain control for addicts in recovery to help prevent a relapse.(when I first came into "FORCED" recovery I had to see one every 1-3mo.Now I make sure my family doctor has a degree in addictive medicine a good thing for me),have wife keep meds,suboxone not just for detox,I got a pain pump with bupivacaine for 3 days,nsaids ATC (motrin/aleve),ice,heat,pt,and meetings. Good luck and think outside the box when having pain issues.
    Living life clean and loving it!!
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  17. #4697
    Monsta Big_Sky_Guy's Avatar
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    Congrats on 7!
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  18. #4698
    Damn, it's good to be me! thepowerwithin's Avatar
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    Congrats on 7 Dogetta. I agree with not having to use something mood altering for pain relief. Just ask.
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  19. #4699
    Riding 2 horses w/1 butt JRT6's Avatar
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    The story behind getting my elbow fixed after five plus years of living with it is this: A couple of mondays ago I was having a really good day. In a moment of extremely rare clarity I decided out of the blue to get my bone spurs removed. I wasn't thinking about it beforehand or anything. I was just driving around at work marveling at the weird sense of presence I had. What I would do to have more days like that.
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  20. #4700
    Progress not Perfection cowboybiker's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by JRT6 View Post
    The story behind getting my elbow fixed after five plus years of living with it is this: A couple of mondays ago I was having a really good day. In a moment of extremely rare clarity I decided out of the blue to get my bone spurs removed. I wasn't thinking about it beforehand or anything. I was just driving around at work marveling at the weird sense of presence I had. What I would do to have more days like that.
    Cherish those moments.
    I know "normies" that need to have them.
    Those of us in recovery are a rare breed.
    We've been through hell and high water.
    Done things that others can not comprehend.
    And have overcome obstacles, one after another.
    And our greatest treasure is clarity and inner peace.
    Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude. – Thomas Jefferson


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  21. #4701
    Registered User MadJasper's Avatar
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    Just shy of 10 months sober. Turned to God, AA and weightlifting in that order.
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  22. #4702
    kant spel muttytwist's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by dogetta View Post
    7 yrs clean and sober today!! from opiates and alcohol YAY!!! To JR I had surgery for a torn labrum and scared.Have your surgeon or anesthesiologist consult a Addictionist who can recommend post op pain control for addicts in recovery to help prevent a relapse.(when I first came into "FORCED" recovery I had to see one every 1-3mo.Now I make sure my family doctor has a degree in addictive medicine a good thing for me),have wife keep meds,suboxone not just for detox,I got a pain pump with bupivacaine for 3 days,nsaids ATC (motrin/aleve),ice,heat,pt,and meetings. Good luck and think outside the box when having pain issues.
    Congrats on the seven years
    "It really is as simple as Eat, Lift, Sleep, Repeat". Buckspin



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  23. #4703
    I grunt pharmamarketer's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by muttytwist View Post
    Congrats on the seven years
    How r things Mutt? You have come a long way since you started posting in here. I have been seeing some good stuff from you as far as staying strong mentally.
    I'm a great believer in luck and I find the harder I work, the more I have of it. ~ Thomas Jefferson
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  24. #4704
    The show goes on chodan9's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by JRT6 View Post
    I'm having elbow surgery in two weeks. Pain meds are going to be problematic. Wife says I have to learn to use my left hand. I need a break.
    I have had a few painful events in recovery (mainline opiate junkie here)
    the first was about 13 years ago, I developed a ruptured L5 disc, I had to 3 months wait for the neurosurgeon to get back from his home country, I had intense pain from my left heel to my upper left glute, as if someone was running a blow torch up and down my leg, and it was 24/7. I made it through this ordeal with no narcotics, I went to surgery and while there they put me on timed Demerol (which I enjoyed way too much) but the surgery cured my pain, they gave me a prescription of Tylox that I gave to my wife, I told her if I needed them I would let her know. Prayer was sufficient to my needs though. I didnt have to take the first one. the absence of my back pain made the surgery pain seem trivial which helped.
    the second was hiatal hernia surgery which was more difficult and took longer than the discectomy, (was in the hospital 2 full days) but I needed no pain meds afterwards, while there they had me on IV Demerol again. If your program is strong, you sponsor and fellowship is aware and available getting through these things are a breeze.
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  25. #4705
    Saved GreenWave1's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by dogetta View Post
    7 yrs clean and sober today!! from opiates and alcohol YAY!!! To JR I had surgery for a torn labrum and scared.Have your surgeon or anesthesiologist consult a Addictionist who can recommend post op pain control for addicts in recovery to help prevent a relapse.(when I first came into "FORCED" recovery I had to see one every 1-3mo.Now I make sure my family doctor has a degree in addictive medicine a good thing for me),have wife keep meds,suboxone not just for detox,I got a pain pump with bupivacaine for 3 days,nsaids ATC (motrin/aleve),ice,heat,pt,and meetings. Good luck and think outside the box when having pain issues.
    Congratulations! Seven years is a long time. Stay strong!
    Jesus is my lifting partner.
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  26. #4706
    Registered User NoSlak's Avatar
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    Congratulations on 7 years Dogetta !!!
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  27. #4707
    Progress not Perfection cowboybiker's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by dogetta View Post
    7 yrs clean and sober today!! from opiates and alcohol YAY!!!
    Happy Birthday


    Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude. – Thomas Jefferson


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  28. #4708
    ௵௵௵௵௵௵௵௵ pbuilder's Avatar
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    I haven't done coke in 2 days.
    500+
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  29. #4709
    Progress not Perfection cowboybiker's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by pbuilder View Post
    I haven't done coke in 2 days.
    Congrats.

    Are you going to meetings?
    Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude. – Thomas Jefferson


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  30. #4710
    Registered User pitbull707's Avatar
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    my addiction thread

    http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showth...0451563&page=3

    feels bad man
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