Fem Misc. Parents, Question about kids and music

[LatinaLoca]

Growing up my parents let me listen to whatever music I wanted, no matter if it had bad language or not. It came with the condition that if I ever started using bad langauge that I'd lose that privilege. IMO it made me more eclectic when it comes to music. Now, with my kids I do the same..they listen to everything I listen to from bluegrass to metal.

Parents, what are your views on what types of music you let your kids listen to?

[*dwest*]

Originally Posted by LatinaLoca

Growing up my parents let me listen to whatever music I wanted, no matter if it had bad language or not. It came with the condition that if I ever started using bad langauge that I'd lose that privilege. IMO it made me more eclectic when it comes to music. Now, with my kids I do the same..they listen to everything I listen to from bluegrass to metal.

Parents, what are your views on what types of music you let your kids listen to?

As long as it's not thug music, of course I can talk about music all day.

But you know that.

[Amanda76]

While she was in elementary school, I kept her a bit more censored, but now that she's old enough to have access to all kinds of music (etc) outside our home, I let my daughter listen to what she wants. I'm really more concerned about the ideas introduced in certain music than the language used, but I figure the basis of her morals and who she is, is pretty set by now and I just need to be around to slowly ease her into making decisions for herself.

With your concern being language, I'm pretty bad about cussing and I told my daughter long ago (mid-elementary school...about the age I started looking up 4-letter words in the dictionary) about it being a difficult habit to break once you start and that sometimes you'll accidentally slip up in a situation where it becomes an embarrassment. Basically, instead of telling her she wasn't allowed to use bad language, I explained all the advantages to not getting in the habit and it turned out that she avoids using it because it's the "smart" thing to do.

Wait...she did say, "That's crappy!" in front of her grandparents once and flipped. I told her it was because I said it all the time (too bad that isn't the extent of the filth that comes out of my mouth...LOL) and she said it because she was used to hearing it and then thinking it. She told me I needed to keep myself in check before I drive her to saying the "F-word" during a job interview. LOL I think kids are more exposed to language by the people around them over the music they listen to. In the same way your accent will change when you live in another part of the country, the "expressives" you use will change based on what you pick up in active conversations.

[erinlee01]

I had my kids totally censored. Then my younger one (turned 4 today) started singing Crazy Train by Ozzy - picked up from his dads. Now my older one is singing So What by Pink - picked up from the bus. And they both LOVE to sing the "I wanna start a fight" part. I guess it's time to stop worrying about it.

[JAWS22]

All depends, I came home singing "Candy Licker" by Marvin Cease, my mom dropped the dishes and went on a head hunting parade.

[javyn]

IMO censorship and repression bring out the very behaviors the censors were trying to avoid in the first place.

I also never understood the nitwitted, Puritanical concept that people in this country have regarding sex vs. violence where extreme violence is okay and acceptable, yet Janet Jackson letting a nipple pop out during the superbowl causes a ruckus around the entire country.

[parsnip1965]

Originally Posted by JAWS22

All depends, I came home singing "Candy Licker" by Marvin Cease, my mom dropped the dishes and went on a head hunting parade.

Funny.

When my 13 year old daughter came home singing something by Lil Kim, we had a similar family experience.

[IronCamp]

Since having my daughter, I've changed what I regularrly
listen just to avoid her being exposed regularly to music that is vulgar, violent and/or disrespectful towards women.

I do think that censorship isn't always the answer, but I also don't want to be the one exposing my child to it either.

[TheBlasterMan]

not a parent here...........

but if they are in a public school, they will get introduced to everything at a very early age. Theres next to nothing you can do about that.

As far as music, dont encourage it, but dont deny it.

Denying it will only encourage them to be secretive and hide things, which will rub off in other situations.

get where im going?


my .2 cents...........

[user945184115145]

My niece (husbands sisters child) listens to everything and thinks she is a gangster: It's really annoying..Her myspace is all about N*** this and I'm a gangsta! I will kick your ass ect. We live outside of Houston and believe me she and her friends are anything but gangsters..but she isn't my child..It's really sad. So I'm not sure if it's the accessibility on the web to all kinds of music or just that her grandparents (who raised her) not being able to monitor or talk to her about what is acceptable. She just turned 17 and it has been a problem since she was 13..

[TheBlasterMan]

yea, throughout the years ive noticed girls like the black boys. Not in the way your thinking.......... Rap is "cool" because its based around "adult words and themes"

[LiftingIsLife]

Music is what it is... music. Think back when you were a kid. did your parents like the music you liked?? probably not. (as always, there are exceptions).
i HATE rap. to me, it not even music. just a bunch of angry individuals spewing venum and trying to act tough. funny thing is, the REALLY TOUGHEST people i have known during my lifetime NEVER had to say anything about their own toughness.
yes, i AM aware that all RAP is not gangsta style rap. but, to me, music is ALL about the music, not somebody 'talking' or 'preaching' their words to a beat.

HAVING SAID all this, my 3 sons ALL love rap, and listen to it all the time.
we never censored anything they wanted to listen to. INSTEAD, and this is the KEY POINT....

talk about it with them. talk about their music. talk about everything else in life. censorship is NOT talking, its hiding, and creating fear, and creating interest, etc,etc..

ya, i said my boys love RAP. ok with me, cuz they love ALL kinds of music and even went with me to the Eagles concert the other night (and loved it,
and i'm an OLD man!!!)

so, like everything else in their world. know it, try to understand it, and present YOUR unbashing views to them. you'd be surprised at how adepth
they are at understanding..........

best,
lifer (who abhors censorship, as if you couldnt tell...LOL)

[Eileen]

It wouldn't occur to me to censor my children's music. I'll come down like a ton of bricks on behaviour which I feel is dishonest, unkind or disrespectful, but really, what they listen to is their business.

Mind you, at the moment, they complain when I listen (and dance) to Guns'n roses, they want to listen to Spice Girls or B*witched.

[bebeklein]

Originally Posted by LatinaLoca

Growing up my parents let me listen to whatever music I wanted, no matter if it had bad language or not. It came with the condition that if I ever started using bad langauge that I'd lose that privilege. IMO it made me more eclectic when it comes to music. Now, with my kids I do the same..they listen to everything I listen to from bluegrass to metal.

Parents, what are your views on what types of music you let your kids listen to?

I think your parents had a great idea in doing that.

Originally Posted by LiftingIsLife

Music is what it is... music. Think back when you were a kid. did your parents like the music you liked?? probably not. (as always, there are exceptions).
i HATE rap. to me, it not even music. just a bunch of angry individuals spewing venum and trying to act tough. funny thing is, the REALLY TOUGHEST people i have known during my lifetime NEVER had to say anything about their own toughness.
yes, i AM aware that all RAP is not gangsta style rap. but, to me, music is ALL about the music, not somebody 'talking' or 'preaching' their words to a beat.

HAVING SAID all this, my 3 sons ALL love rap, and listen to it all the time.
we never censored anything they wanted to listen to. INSTEAD, and this is the KEY POINT....

talk about it with them. talk about their music. talk about everything else in life. censorship is NOT talking, its hiding, and creating fear, and creating interest, etc,etc..

ya, i said my boys love RAP. ok with me, cuz they love ALL kinds of music and even went with me to the Eagles concert the other night (and loved it,
and i'm an OLD man!!!)

so, like everything else in their world. know it, try to understand it, and present YOUR unbashing views to them. you'd be surprised at how adepth
they are at understanding..........

best,
lifer (who abhors censorship, as if you couldnt tell...LOL)

Well I can remember my mom not wanting me to sing Rick James' Super Freak, Donna Summer's Bad Girls, Police's Roxanne, Marvin Gaye's Sexual Healing and I'm pretty sure a couple of Prince songs!

But I love hip hop n rap and I came of age when it came onto the scene. Stereotypes are really just that and in no way reflect the range of music that's available within a genre. People can argue that country music is always about losing your job, a cheating spouse, and alcohol and gambling problems. And I remember growing up a lot of people thought metal was a bunch of devil worship. Some people would use your exact comments about rap to describe metal or rock music. And obviously they are both much more than that.

I love Jay-Z, Nas, Outkast, Kanye, E40.....I could go on, but it really isn't as 1 dimensional as you believe it is. And it's a style of music that shows witt and has a lot of double entendres and even the skill in making certain words rhyme that normally don't. The ones who can freestyle are really amazing to me. Try making up a song on the fly...I've done it for ****s and giggles and I sound like a 5 year old reading a Dr. Seuss book. So yeah, many of these artists are talented and gifted and on that level alone it's something one can appreciate. And I know you said you try and keep an open mind. There are always things we may not understand or relate to and some people will be angry (music is about emotions) but rap doesn't even come close to being 1 sided.

And I appreciate many forms of music and artists - Etta James, Harry Connick Jr, Foo Fighters, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Gerald and Eddie Levert, War, Santana, Celia Cruz, Too $hort, E40, Stevie Nicks, U2, Bon Jovi, and Metallica.

[parsnip1965]

Originally Posted by TheBlasterMan

yea, throughout the years ive noticed girls like the black boys. Not in the way your thinking.......... Rap is "cool" because its based around "adult words and themes"

They also like the black boys in the way you're thinking. A recent poll showed that an astonishing 40% of young people (under 30) said they had been in an interracial relationship.