Bodybuilder Body-Image and Low Self Esteem

[cast iron shore]

Based on several of the people I know from the gym and this forum, I am convinced that bodybuilders (vs. the general population) have a disproportionate amount of body image problems. The most recent example is a guy I know who is muscular and has so little body fat that it won't even register a reading on the bodyfat-measuring thing. He thinks he is too small.

He works out every day at the gym, wakes himself up every three hours at night to eat and drink creatine and protein, eats all day long, and has no hobbies, friends, or life outside of work and working out. Even though he is good-looking he says "the only way I'll attract a woman" is if he bulks up more.

I recognize that it is not necessarily a self esteem issue for competitive bodybuilders and athletes, and I respect the amount of hard work they put into their training. The amount of effort my acquaintance makes would be perfectly appropriate for someone in training for an event. But he's not.

I tried to tell him in a nice way that his real problem probably has more to do with not having much of a life beyond work/gym, which makes conversations with him boring, and that's not something women find attractive. But he's convinced it's his size.

I see the same thing with HUGE bodybuilders, on and off this forum, where all they see is some skinny guy in the mirror that no one else sees, and they feel badly about their appearance in general, no matter how much they accomplish.

Anyone else see this?

[Tyrbolift]

Originally Posted by cast iron shore

Based on several of the people I know from the gym and this forum, I am convinced that bodybuilders (vs. the general population) have a disproportionate amount of body image problems. The most recent example is a guy I know who is muscular and has so little body fat that it won't even register a reading on the bodyfat-measuring thing. He thinks he is too small.

He works out every day at the gym, wakes himself up every three hours at night to eat and drink creatine and protein, eats all day long, and has no hobbies, friends, or life outside of work and working out. Even though he is good-looking he says "the only way I'll attract a woman" is if he bulks up more.

I recognize that it is not necessarily a self esteem issue for competitive bodybuilders and athletes, and I respect the amount of hard work they put into their training. The amount of effort my acquaintance makes would be perfectly appropriate for someone in training for an event. But he's not.

I tried to tell him in a nice way that his real problem probably has more to do with not having much of a life beyond work/gym, which makes conversations with him boring, and that's not something women find attractive. But he's convinced it's his size.

I see the same thing with HUGE bodybuilders, on and off this forum, where all they see is some skinny guy in the mirror that no one else sees, and they feel badly about their appearance in general, no matter how much they accomplish.

Anyone else see this?

I think a lot of people, fat skinny and muscular, all worry somewhat about their physical appearance, but the difference is that bodybuilders are "doers", and the others are 'give-upers" or "resigned."

There are plenty of tubbies that are boring, too, that only think about spectator sports or video games, and there are some very intelligent and well rounded bodybuilder types, too.

Dismorphsia (sp) does occur, but it is not the rule, rather the exception. In fact, I know I look buffer than most of the 50+ population. I don't think I'm skinny in the mirror.

As for your friend, yeah maybe he is a little OC about it, but be rest assured, it would be incorrect to generalize about all bodybuilders based on his example.

[Iron Barbarian]

The Barbarian Brothers came up with the term call Bigorexia. The opposite of Anorexia:

http://menshealth.about.com/cs/menonly/a/bigorexia.htm

[OutOfStep]

Originally Posted by cast iron shore

Based on several of the people I know from the gym and this forum, I am convinced that bodybuilders (vs. the general population) have a disproportionate amount of body image problems. The most recent example is a guy I know who is muscular and has so little body fat that it won't even register a reading on the bodyfat-measuring thing. He thinks he is too small.

He works out every day at the gym, wakes himself up every three hours at night to eat and drink creatine and protein, eats all day long, and has no hobbies, friends, or life outside of work and working out. Even though he is good-looking he says "the only way I'll attract a woman" is if he bulks up more.

I recognize that it is not necessarily a self esteem issue for competitive bodybuilders and athletes, and I respect the amount of hard work they put into their training. The amount of effort my acquaintance makes would be perfectly appropriate for someone in training for an event. But he's not.

I tried to tell him in a nice way that his real problem probably has more to do with not having much of a life beyond work/gym, which makes conversations with him boring, and that's not something women find attractive. But he's convinced it's his size.

I see the same thing with HUGE bodybuilders, on and off this forum, where all they see is some skinny guy in the mirror that no one else sees, and they feel badly about their appearance in general, no matter how much they accomplish.

Anyone else see this?

I think there are a lot of people who have body image problems, and most of them aren't bodybuilders. Are there bodybuilders out there who have body image issues, no doubt, I'v met plenty. Although I'm passionate about fitness and bodybuilding, I have always tried to be a well rounded person with other interests (a life) outside of the gym. A sound mind in a sound body is something I strive for. I spend less than two hours per week in the gym lifting weights so I wouldn't say it takes up much of my time. I always want to progress, be bigger, leaner etc. but I'm quite happy with what I've achieved thus far. I'd like to think I can carry on an intelligent conversation about any topic and I can also program a computer, play an instrument, fix a car, and I'm currently pursuing a degree in nutrition, so there is more to me than bench presses and bicep curls lol.

[RoscoPico]

Show me proof.

[Tyrbolift]

Originally Posted by OutOfStep

so there is more to me than bench presses and bicep curls lol.

Well, it looks like you may also be familiar with what a squat is.

But seriously, OP, hang around on this forum and read what some of us post about other things, and you will see OutofStep is talking the reality of the situation.

[Iron Barbarian]

x2.

Originally Posted by OutOfStep

I think there are a lot of people who have body image problems, and most of them aren't bodybuilders. Are there bodybuilders out there who have body image issues, no doubt, I'v met plenty. Although I'm passionate about fitness and bodybuilding, I have always tried to be a well rounded person with other interests (a life) outside of the gym. A sound mind in a sound body is something I strive for. I spend less than two hours per week in the gym lifting weights so I wouldn't say it takes up much of my time. I always want to progress, be bigger, leaner etc. but I'm quite happy with what I've achieved thus far. I'd like to think I can carry on an intelligent conversation about any topic and I can also program a computer, play an instrument, fix a car, and I'm currently pursuing a degree in nutrition, so there is more to me than bench presses and bicep curls lol.

[RoscoPico]

Originally Posted by Tyrbolift

Well, it looks like you may also be familiar with what a squat is.

But seriously, OP, hang around on this forum and read what some of us post about other things, and you will see OutofStep is talking the reality of the situation.

Side quote - this forum does not represent the general population.

[Karl_Hungus]

Well -- Most of us going to the gym do so to improve ourselves and become better than we are....whether that be to become bigger, stronger, leaner, etc. etc., but I don't think that is unhealthy unless taken to an extreme. It sounds like your friend might be taking it to an extreme, but I don't think his views are typical of most regular gym denizens.

[cast iron shore]

Originally Posted by OutOfStep

I'm quite happy with what I've achieved thus far.

I think this is the difference that I'm really talking about. People who make an effort to look/feel better through exercise and appreciate what they have (and nothing wrong with wanting more), versus those who only see the lacking part of themselves (shoulders could be bigger, etc) and can't really appreciate the good.

I certainly didn't mean to imply that all bodybuilders have body dysmorphic disorder. I was referring more to a trend that I have noticed more among bodybuilders than people who have a hobby or profession that does not involve their personal appearance. From the responses I'm reading, I think people misunderstood what I said, or perhaps I said it badly.

[Tyrbolift]

Originally Posted by cast iron shore

I think this is the difference that I'm really talking about. People who make an effort to look/feel better through exercise and appreciate what they have (and nothing wrong with wanting more), versus those who only see the lacking part of themselves (shoulders could be bigger, etc) and can't really appreciate the good.

I certainly didn't mean to imply that all bodybuilders have body dysmorphic disorder. I was referring more to a trend that I have noticed more among bodybuilders than people who have a hobby or profession that does not involve their personal appearance.

Some people just take things to extremes, regardless of what it is. I met a guy once who made his entire backyard into one big giant mile long HO train track set. Little towns, little trees, little cars, little mining sites, little grain storage tanks. The works.

[Karl_Hungus]

Originally Posted by cast iron shore

I think this is the difference that I'm really talking about. People who make an effort to look/feel better through exercise and appreciate what they have (and nothing wrong with wanting more), versus those who only see the lacking part of themselves (shoulders could be bigger, etc) and can't really appreciate the good.

I certainly didn't mean to imply that all bodybuilders have body dysmorphic disorder. I was referring more to a trend that I have noticed more among bodybuilders than people who have a hobby or profession that does not involve their personal appearance.

It might be that some of these people don't feel like they have anything else going for them, so they define their worth primarily based on their physical appearance. If I got severely injured and couldn't work out ever again, I'd be pretty bummed, but I wouldn't feel like my reason for living was gone. I have plenty of other things in my life, and plenty of other things to offer. Lifting weights and getting strong is just one aspect of my life, and I think that is key. Once it becomes the only thing in your life, you tend to define yourself by that one thing, and become obsessive on every little flaw or inadequacy that you see. Any physical imperfection represents a diminution of your worth as a person. The key is to become a well-rounded person, and not to define yourself and your worth be any one particular thing.

[OutOfStep]

If your friend was preparing for a show, I could (kind of) understand his behavior. It sounds to me like he needs to spend some time in therapy.

[gjohnson5]

Originally Posted by cast iron shore

Based on several of the people I know from the gym and this forum, I am convinced that bodybuilders (vs. the general population) have a disproportionate amount of body image problems. The most recent example is a guy I know who is muscular and has so little body fat that it won't even register a reading on the bodyfat-measuring thing. He thinks he is too small.

He works out every day at the gym, wakes himself up every three hours at night to eat and drink creatine and protein, eats all day long, and has no hobbies, friends, or life outside of work and working out. Even though he is good-looking he says "the only way I'll attract a woman" is if he bulks up more.

I recognize that it is not necessarily a self esteem issue for competitive bodybuilders and athletes, and I respect the amount of hard work they put into their training. The amount of effort my acquaintance makes would be perfectly appropriate for someone in training for an event. But he's not.

I tried to tell him in a nice way that his real problem probably has more to do with not having much of a life beyond work/gym, which makes conversations with him boring, and that's not something women find attractive. But he's convinced it's his size.

I see the same thing with HUGE bodybuilders, on and off this forum, where all they see is some skinny guy in the mirror that no one else sees, and they feel badly about their appearance in general, no matter how much they accomplish.

Anyone else see this?

Your "diagnosis" of other peoples dedication is probably what the real self esteem problem is IMHO
If you have been unable to achieve similar accomplishments , why would you knock someone else???
If this is the life he wishes to live , who are you to tell him he's wrong?

[cast iron shore]

Originally Posted by gjohnson5

Your "diagnosis" of other peoples dedication is probably what the real self esteem problem is IMHO
If you have been unable to achieve similar accomplishments , why would you knock someone else???
If this is the life he wishes to live , who are you to tell him he's wrong?

I don't understand your post. I'm not talking about dedication at all, which is a quality I admire. I didn't say anything about my own accomplishments in any way, I wasn't knocking anyone else's accomplishments, or telling my friend he was wrong about anything. In my text that you bolded, you're globalizing a specific situation I was talking about and drawing conclusions for me that I didn't make.

[dbx]

Originally Posted by gjohnson5

Your "diagnosis" of other peoples dedication is probably what the real self esteem problem is IMHO
If you have been unable to achieve similar accomplishments , why would you knock someone else???
If this is the life he wishes to live , who are you to tell him he's wrong?

Reread what you highlighted, and if you come to the same conclusion, that the OP is somehow disrespecting his friend, you need to take a course in comprehension.

[reamade]

I am very happy with the muscle that I have gained so far in bodybuilding. Yes, I will probably never be big enough to say " Wow, I'm as big as I want to be" but that's ok. I think you can be happy with your progress and still not be satisfied at the same time. Don't think anyone who knows me would say that I have low self esteem. That's funny just writing it.

http://reamade.wordpress.com/

[Taichichuan]

Originally Posted by cast iron shore

Based on several of the people I know from the gym and this forum, I am convinced that bodybuilders (vs. the general population) have a disproportionate amount of body image problems. The most recent example is a guy I know who is muscular and has so little body fat that it won't even register a reading on the bodyfat-measuring thing. He thinks he is too small.

He works out every day at the gym, wakes himself up every three hours at night to eat and drink creatine and protein, eats all day long, and has no hobbies, friends, or life outside of work and working out. Even though he is good-looking he says "the only way I'll attract a woman" is if he bulks up more.

I recognize that it is not necessarily a self esteem issue for competitive bodybuilders and athletes, and I respect the amount of hard work they put into their training. The amount of effort my acquaintance makes would be perfectly appropriate for someone in training for an event. But he's not.

I tried to tell him in a nice way that his real problem probably has more to do with not having much of a life beyond work/gym, which makes conversations with him boring, and that's not something women find attractive. But he's convinced it's his size.

I see the same thing with HUGE bodybuilders, on and off this forum, where all they see is some skinny guy in the mirror that no one else sees, and they feel badly about their appearance in general, no matter how much they accomplish.

Anyone else see this?

Get your friend to a psychiatrist before he gets too fyucked up!
Seriously! There was a guy that worked at the Powerhouse Gym.
His name was Michael! This guy was on the verge of salivating to get big.
He wanted to be bigger, stronger, and faster! Cliff, the gym manager, bought Mike the steroids. Mike was getting bigger every week and he out distance me and I was natural! Michael continued to take the 'roids with Cliff's help.
This MF'er died of a heart attack at the Redford Theater on stage in Royal Oak, MI. during a pose down ! Poor Mike, he should have listen to me. "Just a little bit not a lot!"

[gjohnson5]

Originally Posted by cast iron shore

He works out every day at the gym, wakes himself up every three hours at night to eat and drink creatine and protein, eats all day long, and has no hobbies, friends, or life outside of work and working out. Even though he is good-looking he says "the only way I'll attract a woman" is if he bulks up more.

Originally Posted by cast iron shore

I don't understand your post. I'm not talking about dedication at all

The time he is putting in is dedication. Some people are just perfectionists and they put the time in so they can look in the manner that they feel will, I guess, attract the best of the opposite sex for them. But the underlying work is still dedication. Maybe a case of OCD , but the work is still dedication

[gjohnson5]

Originally Posted by dbx

Reread what you highlighted, and if you come to the same conclusion, that the OP is somehow disrespecting his friend, you need to take a course in comprehension.

Reread what I wrote and point out where I used the word disrespect....

[dbx]

Originally Posted by gjohnson5

Reread what I wrote and point out where I used the word disrespect?

LOL. No, you didn't actually use the word "disrespect". You win

"Your "diagnosis" of other peoples dedication is probably what the real self esteem problem is IMHO
If you have been unable to achieve similar accomplishments , why would you knock someone else???
If this is the life he wishes to live , who are you to tell him he's wrong?"

It sure sounded to me that you were busting the OP's balls for "knocking" his friend. In any event, it's crystal clear that you misunderstood the OP's intentions and meaning of his thread, and that he was showing a genuine concern toward his friend.

[gjohnson5]

Originally Posted by dbx

LOL. No, you didn't actually use the word "disrespect". You win

"Your "diagnosis" of other peoples dedication is probably what the real self esteem problem is IMHO
If you have been unable to achieve similar accomplishments , why would you knock someone else???
If this is the life he wishes to live , who are you to tell him he's wrong?"

It sure sounded to me that you were busting the OP's balls for "knocking" his friend. In any event, it's crystal clear that you misunderstood the OP's intentions and meaning of his thread, and that he was showing a genuine concern toward his friend.

In some respects I was because
1. The type of life one leads is a personal choice
2. The type of mate one finds would need to be compatible with themselves

I don't believe the guy he's talking about or anyone else for that matter should attempt to artificially change themselves around and play a role in order to meet people. If that is who he is then that's who he is. The OP cannot say he's wrong for being who he is. The dude just needs to find a mate who will accept him for him.

So I guess the OP is knocking the guy for being himself and IMHO that is wrong
And if you feel that "acting" is an effective means for one to find a good and long lasting relationship then the OP is not in that boat alone....

[Do_Somethin]

Originally Posted by cast iron shore

Based on several of the people I know from the gym and this forum, I am convinced that bodybuilders (vs. the general population) have a disproportionate amount of body image problems. The most recent example is a guy I know who is muscular and has so little body fat that it won't even register a reading on the bodyfat-measuring thing. He thinks he is too small.

He works out every day at the gym, wakes himself up every three hours at night to eat and drink creatine and protein, eats all day long, and has no hobbies, friends, or life outside of work and working out. Even though he is good-looking he says "the only way I'll attract a woman" is if he bulks up more.

I recognize that it is not necessarily a self esteem issue for competitive bodybuilders and athletes, and I respect the amount of hard work they put into their training. The amount of effort my acquaintance makes would be perfectly appropriate for someone in training for an event. But he's not.

I tried to tell him in a nice way that his real problem probably has more to do with not having much of a life beyond work/gym, which makes conversations with him boring, and that's not something women find attractive. But he's convinced it's his size.

I see the same thing with HUGE bodybuilders, on and off this forum, where all they see is some skinny guy in the mirror that no one else sees, and they feel badly about their appearance in general, no matter how much they accomplish.

Anyone else see this?

Originally Posted by Karl_Hungus

Well -- Most of us going to the gym do so to improve ourselves and become better than we are....whether that be to become bigger, stronger, leaner, etc. etc., but I don't think that is unhealthy unless taken to an extreme. It sounds like your friend might be taking it to an extreme, but I don't think his views are typical of most regular gym denizens.

I think you're both referring to body dysmorphic disorder.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Body_dysmorphic_disorder

Edit: Posted before reading the rest of the thread. Doh!

[domineaux]

Originally Posted by cast iron shore

Based on several of the people I know from the gym and this forum, I am convinced that bodybuilders (vs. the general population) have a disproportionate amount of body image problems. The most recent example is a guy I know who is muscular and has so little body fat that it won't even register a reading on the bodyfat-measuring thing. He thinks he is too small.

He works out every day at the gym, wakes himself up every three hours at night to eat and drink creatine and protein, eats all day long, and has no hobbies, friends, or life outside of work and working out. Even though he is good-looking he says "the only way I'll attract a woman" is if he bulks up more.

Originally Posted by cast iron shore

I recognize that it is not necessarily a self esteem issue for competitive bodybuilders and athletes, and I respect the amount of hard work they put into their training. The amount of effort my acquaintance makes would be perfectly appropriate for someone in training for an event. But he's not.

I tried to tell him in a nice way that his real problem probably has more to do with not having much of a life beyond work/gym, which makes conversations with him boring, and that's not something women find attractive. But he's convinced it's his size.

Originally Posted by cast iron shore

I see the same thing with HUGE bodybuilders, on and off this forum, where all they see is some skinny guy in the mirror that no one else sees, and they feel badly about their appearance in general, no matter how much they accomplish.

Originally Posted by cast iron shore

Anyone else see this?

I started to respond to this original posting and realized it is just so much B.S.

IMO, people do what they do because they want to. You go around psycho- analyzing everyone you make yourself a candidate for the nut-house.

The world we live in is full of people with psych problems, watch the news. Problems for the most part that aren't even worth discussion, because we can't fix none of them.

Besides, us muscleheads aren't supposed to think. We might break somethin'.

[fitness4fun]

As a female, I can say without question that what the OP says is very true! I have seen and heard many times women bashing their bodies when it is so clear that they have come so far and look amazing!!! Hell, they look better than most people younger then them!! Yet, they continue beating themselves up, restricting their diets even further and doing hours a day of cardio!! Come on, this is NOT healthy for anyone!!
~This group that is being talked about are the ones who do nothing in life but workout and who fear certain food or food groups.

Of course the people who are competing are not the ones being discussed

[OutOfStep]

Originally Posted by reamade

Yes, I will probably never be big enough to say " Wow, I'm as big as I want to be" but that's ok. I think you can be happy with your progress and still not be satisfied at the same time.
http://reamade.wordpress.com/

I agree. There needs to be some type of dissatisfaction with your physique to compel you to move forward and improve. I've always had a picture in my head of how I want to look. It is an ideal I know I will never quite attain. I view the whole process as a life long pursuit and I enjoy it. The thing that is important is to make sure you are enjoying the process of developing your physique and to appreciate the results you've gotten. Some people focus too much on the destination and don't pay attention to the journey, which is the more interesting part IMO.

[dbx]

Originally Posted by gjohnson5

So I guess the OP is knocking the guy for being himself and IMHO that is wrong

Sorry for delay...real world distraction

Anyway, here's the way I see it, and the way it looked laid out to me; his friend was the one lamenting about not being able to attract women. The OP, who is a member here and works out himself (I think some have lost sight of this), was simply responding to his friend by offering a different reason why the friend doesn't have a girl. Sure, his friend is obviously dedicated, going by the OP's description, and there's nothing wrong with that. Nobody would argue this point. However, if the guy only works and goes to the gym...you have to admit it might be a touch challenging for him to meet a girl...even one that shares his hobby. I mean, if he can't find "her" at his current gym, where is he likely to find "her"? Remember, the buddy is the one who is wondering if he'll ever attract a woman. Again, the OP simply suggested he might want to free up some time to accomplish this. And I'd have probably offered the same advice .

[reamade]

Originally Posted by OutOfStep

people focus too much on the destination and don't pay attention to the journey

That should be a sig.

http://reamade.wordpress.com/

[chocs]

One of my old high school teachers used to tell me when you finish doing the test quickly hand it up. Because if you sit there, you rub out the old answer and put a new one which is worse because the first answer was right. I think the same happens with over doing anything in life.

[gbg]

Originally Posted by OutOfStep

I think there are a lot of people who have body image problems, and most of them aren't bodybuilders. Are there bodybuilders out there who have body image issues, no doubt, I'v met plenty. Although I'm passionate about fitness and bodybuilding, I have always tried to be a well rounded person with other interests (a life) outside of the gym. A sound mind in a sound body is something I strive for. I spend less than two hours per week in the gym lifting weights so I wouldn't say it takes up much of my time. I always want to progress, be bigger, leaner etc. but I'm quite happy with what I've achieved thus far. I'd like to think I can carry on an intelligent conversation about any topic and I can also program a computer, play an instrument, fix a car, and I'm currently pursuing a degree in nutrition, so there is more to me than bench presses and bicep curls lol.

Can you come program my computer???