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  1. #1
    "JFT Boys" u5711's Avatar
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    Question How to deal with typical 35-45 year old Joe Schmoe without motivation or dedication??

    So, I'm just curious what actual personal trainers with experience do when they get a new client and they are basically your average joe or sally who wants to lose weight and "tone up" and they are not highly motivated YET they still show up to train, albeit not thrilled. They dont workout; they've never had a good diet; never played sports or really know what its like to be in shape, etc.


    I mean, you can't give this person a strict weightloss diet and expect them to follow it, yet they probably want more results in a too-short timeframe. It's one thing to deal with a person who really wants to get that ideal physique, but not everyone is like that. How do you handle it? I think you start with small steps, but somewhere along the line you need to do something serious or results just won't come from a half-ass effort.

    Would like to know how you experienced folk handle this!
    "Like those in the valley behind us, most people stand in sight of the spiritual mountains all their lives and never enter them, being content to listen to others who have been there and thus avoid the hardships."
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  2. #2
    SFW! Drew23's Avatar
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    Not experienced, but I would try to pawn him off on someone else. If they have no desire to do work, they're not going to get the results they want and it will ultimately make you look bad. Let someone else deal with it.
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  3. #3
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    just remind them why they initially came into the gym. they signed up and bought personal training because they want results. they are coming to you as the professional and seek your advice, and therefore should be willing to listen and work hard. ive had a bunch of these types of clients; just be positive and motivating in your efforts.
    theres a few trainers at my gym that just care about their paychecks and doing as many sessions as they can without focusing on each client. let them know you are there to help, be positive, give them results, be motivating in your personality and training style, and you will have a long term client.
    hope this helps.
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  4. #4
    "JFT Boys" u5711's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Drew23 View Post
    Not experienced, but I would try to pawn him off on someone else. If they have no desire to do work, they're not going to get the results they want and it will ultimately make you look bad. Let someone else deal with it.
    lol, that's kind why I asked for experienced people who can deal with this. obviously it isn't the sort of client we WANT to deal with, but unless you're charless glass or training a select group (bodybuilders for example) some people just aren't going to be very motivated .
    "Like those in the valley behind us, most people stand in sight of the spiritual mountains all their lives and never enter them, being content to listen to others who have been there and thus avoid the hardships."
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  5. #5
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    Here's my approach:

    1) Establish stepping stones. ACSM states that a client can decrease body fat by 1.5 Lbs per week, and gain lean tissue as fast as 1 lb per weak with no deficits toward health. Get you clients on the scales, tape them, and calculate their bodyfat, and reduce these amounts by an increment with a goal deadline of two weeks. Initially, these goals will be very easy to attain because of the new stimulus toward their body along with a tight nutrition plan. Once they accomplish these stepping stones month by month, their overall weight will begin to decline and they will notice the benefits.

    2) Get them a workout partner. Find someone, perhaps another client of yours, that has similiar goals, personality, and body type. The encouragement of another person to reach fitness goals always stimulates a good response.

    3) Encouragement and congratulations. Always establish a good atmosphere and congratulate them on accomplishments, especially when they attain a new personal goal. Whether it be weight loss, weight gain, or putting up more weight then ever before. Show them that they are making progress.

    4) Teach them everything you know. If they have the information, their only excuse can be that they gave up. No one wants to give up if a goal is established for them.
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  6. #6
    Registered User John Prophet's Avatar
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    do you choose your own clients or does the gym assign them to you?

    if its your choice then id just find a nice way to make clear that his progress depends on him and that as a professional, if u feel the 2 of you arent progressing then u will have to step away from the relationship
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  7. #7
    Registered User rpatrick5's Avatar
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    Your objective is to train, not cheerlead. Find people who want to make changes, it will make you look better if you know what you are doing.

    Settling for one of these clients takes away from the experience we love as personal trainers. If you tell people you won't take them on as a client they will always want it that much more (adults are just big kids).

    If it pisses them off they'll talk about it and when people ask all they can say is what you told them, "because I wasn't serious enough". Now you look good to other people.
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  8. #8
    Registered User John Prophet's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by rpatrick5 View Post
    Your objective is to train, not cheerlead. Find people who want to make changes, it will make you look better if you know what you are doing.

    Settling for one of these clients takes away from the experience we love as personal trainers. If you tell people you won't take them on as a client they will always want it that much more (adults are just big kids).

    If it pisses them off they'll talk about it and when people ask all they can say is what you told them, "because I wasn't serious enough". Now you look good to other people.
    I agree, just ONE of those clients drains all of your energy
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  9. #9
    Registered User njmuscle66's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by John Prophet View Post
    I agree, just ONE of those clients drains all of your energy
    Exactly right. I have had two such circumstances and I "fired them". Told them the bottom line is when I agreed to train you I made a commitment to provide the skills, knowledge and motivation to assist you in reaching your fitness goals. However you also made a commitment to me and you are not keeping your end of the bargain. You let me know we you are ready to give the same type of commitment to your fitness goals that I am to help you achieve them. Got a call from both of them in about a week or so and never had any issues after that
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  10. #10
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    I disagree. . i really think half the job of a personal trainer is to motivate. . we have the knowledge our clients want but some are paying for motivation. . dont give up on any client. . as trainers our job is to get the best out of people. . find a way to get them motivated or ur not doing ur job. . these people who come to us do not have the motivation or backround we have thats why they come to us and pay us good money. . Paul Bear Bryant an old Alabama football coach would always come out on a press conference after a loss and blame himself and the coaching.. after a win he would always give full credit to the players:

    If we have an intercepted pass, I threw it. I'm the head coach. If we get a punt blocked, I caused it. A bad practice, a bad game, it's up to the head coach to assume his responsibility. ? If anything goes bad, I did it. If anything goes semi-good, we did it. If anything goes really good, then you did it.

    not trying to be all preachy but a teacher of mine gave me a similar example and its stuck with me. .if every client was self motivated and enthusiastic our jobs would be too easy an unnecessary. .
    Last edited by ny58; 04-28-2008 at 07:38 PM.
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  11. #11
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    This is a real pet peeve of mine.

    You know what? You have to find a reason to be motivated to do something. I can try to encourage when there is improvement and be happy that I helped with that. But I can't give you that reason because my reasons to train are different that someone else's.

    I'll teach how to work out safely and effectively and maybe inspire. But if they don't follow it what can you do?
    "I just wanna get in shape." is really a broad category too.
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  12. #12
    Deadlifts make you grow mrgeecue's Avatar
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    i think it really is our job to help motivate ppl. you acquire clients that need help. Not only just to explain and show how to execute an exercise, but to make them Want to workout.

    What makes us actually get up and actually do something that you want to do? MOTIVATION. and sometimes we all need some. try ur best to motivate your client. find out ways to get his attention and relate it to his own life. if you can do that, it will set you apart from other trainers. And make that client want to stick with you for a long time.

    when other gym goers see that your client is happy and excited to work out, those people will be more inclined to work with you as opposed to someone who doesn't stand out and just tells a client what exercises to do.
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    Smile Schmoe protocol

    What I do is remind them of why they started training in the first place. As they say, you can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink. You can't force someone to be physically fit and be motivated to do so. I perfer to use positive reinforcement as motivation. Show them their results and re-evaluate their goals and 9 times out of 10, they'll get on track. For that 10th person, take a picture of them and ask them if this is the look they want the rest of their life? (a little shame goes a long way)
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  14. #14
    "JFT Boys" u5711's Avatar
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    Great advice so far! I really agree with you ny58. I feel part of a job of a trainer is to motivate.
    "Like those in the valley behind us, most people stand in sight of the spiritual mountains all their lives and never enter them, being content to listen to others who have been there and thus avoid the hardships."
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    Registered User John Prophet's Avatar
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    there is only so much u can do. for instance there r guys who join a gym "because their wife made them"...then when they miss an appointment its because "my wife bought tickets to so and so and didnt tell me until the last minute"

    I mean, if a man doesnt have more backbone or self drive than that, then he needs help beyond what I can give him.

    Ig a guy loses 20 lbs and STILL coems to the gym depressed, down in the mouth etc and continues to make comments such as "when will i see results"....then I just cant do anymore for him at that point. Juts by losing 20lbs he has done more than 99% of gym members will EVER do...yet he cant see it and he just complains?

    Tell u what...u other trainers give me your number, ill gladly send him to you, lol


    IMO, life is all about energy....u have to constantly output your personal energy to guys like that and they are like a sponge...all take and no give. There is only so much energy u can afford to give to one client on a consistent basis before he basically drags down your whole operation
    Last edited by John Prophet; 04-29-2008 at 02:10 PM.
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    The job is to motivate people sure, but you can't make people who aren't ready to make changes motivated. Bottom line, if people aren't REALLY ready to do it, then they won't.

    You can try up and down, do some reverse-double-Freudian psych on their ass but if they aren't ready to change, you can motivate them to want to change. 65% of peopl are overweight or obese and a lot of people are OK with that. They'll try some "fad" diet, but they won't make serious changes because they just don't care enough no matter who is rocking the pom-poms.


    Why waste your time and frustration with these people when you can find clients lives who you can really change and touch? It's more than a physical change, it ends up being more self-confidence, better overall lifestyle. I dunno about you, but I'd rather find people who need a little nudge here than there then someone I have to change their entire belief system.
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  17. #17
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    Originally Posted by njmuscle66 View Post
    Exactly right. I have had two such circumstances and I "fired them". Told them the bottom line is when I agreed to train you I made a commitment to provide the skills, knowledge and motivation to assist you in reaching your fitness goals. However you also made a commitment to me and you are not keeping your end of the bargain. You let me know we you are ready to give the same type of commitment to your fitness goals that I am to help you achieve them. Got a call from both of them in about a week or so and never had any issues after that
    probably makes them think too about the $$ they pay you and not let it go to waste..
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  18. #18
    Broscience > Studies Al Shades's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by u5711 View Post
    So, I'm just curious what actual personal trainers with experience do when they get a new client and they are basically your average joe or sally who wants to lose weight and "tone up" and they are not highly motivated YET they still show up to train, albeit not thrilled. They dont workout; they've never had a good diet; never played sports or really know what its like to be in shape, etc.


    I mean, you can't give this person a strict weightloss diet and expect them to follow it, yet they probably want more results in a too-short timeframe. It's one thing to deal with a person who really wants to get that ideal physique, but not everyone is like that. How do you handle it? I think you start with small steps, but somewhere along the line you need to do something serious or results just won't come from a half-ass effort.

    Would like to know how you experienced folk handle this!
    Give them a detailed plan to follow and bully them into adherence.

    Basically, treat them like a child. What else can be done with someone who has little discipline and no self confidence?
    Last edited by Al Shades; 04-30-2008 at 07:49 AM.
    Always defending sat. fat, low-carb, high-protein, machine training, isolation exercises and "broscience".

    Bodybuilding has been advanced through anecdotal knowledge. Studies are over-rated. Experienced BB'ers understand training far better than scientists.

    I've always had the belief that if you want to be where somebody is, then do what they did...the real experts are the ones that are in the gym getting the job done. Those are the people that you need to listen to. – Dave Tate
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  19. #19
    Fitness Expert josephinedalton's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by u5711 View Post
    So, I'm just curious what actual personal trainers with experience do when they get a new client and they are basically your average joe or sally who wants to lose weight and "tone up" and they are not highly motivated YET they still show up to train, albeit not thrilled. They dont workout; they've never had a good diet; never played sports or really know what its like to be in shape, etc.


    I mean, you can't give this person a strict weightloss diet and expect them to follow it, yet they probably want more results in a too-short timeframe. It's one thing to deal with a person who really wants to get that ideal physique, but not everyone is like that. How do you handle it? I think you start with small steps, but somewhere along the line you need to do something serious or results just won't come from a half-ass effort.

    Would like to know how you experienced folk handle this!
    If I worked at a gym, I'd ditch him. When such a client shows no visible sign of progress, it can reflect on your repuation as a trainer.

    Since I work privately at a studio, I get very strict with the client so that no matter what, he shows up! If he's not motivated to make it happen, at least he'll get a workout during his hour with me.... enough to help lower his cardiovascular disease risk.
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  20. #20
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    josephinedalton, ya doesn't hurt that your drop dead gorgeous.

    lol..I'd show up just for the eye candy.
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  21. #21
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    Originally Posted by rpatrick5 View Post
    The job is to motivate people sure, but you can't make people who aren't ready to make changes motivated. Bottom line, if people aren't REALLY ready to do it, then they won't.

    You can try up and down, do some reverse-double-Freudian psych on their ass but if they aren't ready to change, you can motivate them to want to change. 65% of peopl are overweight or obese and a lot of people are OK with that. They'll try some "fad" diet, but they won't make serious changes because they just don't care enough no matter who is rocking the pom-poms.


    Why waste your time and frustration with these people when you can find clients lives who you can really change and touch? It's more than a physical change, it ends up being more self-confidence, better overall lifestyle. I dunno about you, but I'd rather find people who need a little nudge here than there then someone I have to change their entire belief system.
    i can understand that if u try every which way and the person is just a deadbeat. .drop him/her
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  22. #22
    Registered User lis662's Avatar
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    unmotivated clients

    I am a dietitian (personal trainer in the past) but I deal with the same thing. Always assess their readiness to change and discuss it with them so you're on the same page. I find that best results can be achieved when you set easy to obtain, real short term goals at first to build confidence, show them they can do it, and desire to keep going.
    Also relate to them and show them that you are human too. A lot of clients that you are talking about feel you have no idea what they are like and are some kind of robot that loves to workout and doesn't have any tastebuds-and so can eat veggies and chicken without any problem. haha- man are they wrong.

    Also explaining why you are doing things and teaching them along the way makes them smarter at decision making when you aren't with them.
    I find that some of my favorite clients are those that come in not too motivated- once you show you have faith in them and want them to succeed- (and definately acknowledge improvements) they'll come around.

    A lot of work? yes. Rewarding? Hell ya
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