Disclaimer for mods: This topic is for theoretical disscusion. I have no interest in becoming a hitman for hire nor do i advise anyone to.
So where do i start? (serious)
Im tired of running the rat race. Im up for a different pace.
Becomming a cop is not an option for me due to not being able to pass the poly. (tried twice at 2 diff stations in 2 different states). Its about as far as i can get due to experimenting with cocaine.
Mob? I met a few contacts and from what ive seen.. i worked at a bouncer at an italian place but they were just doing some minor illegal gambling. It was nothing big, hell even the cops knew about it and did nothing.
Military? Possible for training, but the chance of dieing for ****ty pay and horrible pollitical reasons. Far from worth it. Or would something like Navy seal or recon training help? They do more demolition then assasination work.
Assasination is serious big business. Un documented but someone always wants someone killed. And are willing to pay massive amounts of cash.
Im just curious.
Also no: be a rapper(fake), join a gang, drug dealer. Those are all weak sub criminal positions.
Im talking about targeted assasinations and hits.
03-20-2008, 04:15 PM #1
(SeriouS) How do i become a hitman for hire?
03-20-2008, 04:16 PM #2
- Join Date: Sep 2006
- Location: Seattle, Washington, United States
- Age: 28
- Posts: 15,305
- Rep Power: 8057
Probably start with the miscAnd all who look shall see them there,
And all should cry, Beware ! Beware !
His flashing eyes, his floating hair !
Weave a circle round him thrice,
And close your eyes with holy dread,
For he on honey-dew hath fed,
And drunk the milk of Paradise.
Snatch 180 Clean and jerk 230
03-20-2008, 04:17 PM #3
03-20-2008, 04:17 PM #4
03-20-2008, 04:18 PM #5
03-20-2008, 04:18 PM #6
Goto this website
http://tinyurl.com/2zg4oStay safe, Stay 2nd Amendment.
Disclaimer: Nothing in this post should be taken seriously, as it is entirely satirical.
The information contained in this post is for general humor purposes only. Any reliance you place on such information is therefore strictly at your own risk. In no event will we be liable for any loss or damage whatsoever arising from lack of a sense of humor.
03-20-2008, 04:18 PM #7
03-20-2008, 04:19 PM #8
03-20-2008, 04:19 PM #9
03-20-2008, 04:19 PM #10
03-20-2008, 04:20 PM #11
03-20-2008, 04:23 PM #12
03-20-2008, 04:27 PM #13
03-20-2008, 04:28 PM #14
step one: join army
step two: apply for sniper school
step three: become an "ACE" sniper
step four: seperate from ARMY
step five: Apply for CIA special "investigations" unit, ps, you need a Masters degree in Criminal Justice.
Step six: volunteer to off the president of the united states for actually working for the people and not against the people
Step seven: assasinate the pres, become government fall guy
step eight: become shot in the face as you are being escorted to your hearing
step nine: be forever known by your first, middle, and last name
step ten: there is no step ten, you are dead by nownatty since '03
03-20-2008, 04:28 PM #15
if i were to hypothetically become a hitman i would
a) join military and enter special forces training
b) get out of military and work as a security /alarm installer person to know how to disarm gain entry to places/ppls homes
c) take some acting classes and studio make up for disguises
remember no women. no children.
d) watch the professional like 20x im pretty sure that certifies you as a pro hitman guy."I won't be the inconsequential, I won't be the wasted potential"
03-20-2008, 04:32 PM #16
03-20-2008, 04:33 PM #17
03-20-2008, 04:35 PM #18
Not to get into anything illegal here but there was apparently a serious (I think) manual published for being a hitman...
It was apparently banned in the U.S. but a simple entry of the title into google or so yields you the entire contents as the book is no longer published (obviously). No I'm not becoming a hitman so please FBI man don't come after me.
03-20-2008, 04:36 PM #19
03-20-2008, 04:37 PM #20
03-20-2008, 04:38 PM #21
03-20-2008, 04:39 PM #22
You just feel the urge to kill?
Let me ask you...
would you be able to kill a hot girl?
Would you be able to blow up a car with the target and his family (including kids)
Would you be able to kill a mark that is a 15 years old?
Can you fight well in hand to hand combat?
Can you interrograte and torture people?
I thought about becoming one but technology is too good these days. They will get you if you leave a fraction of your finger tip.
03-20-2008, 04:42 PM #23
- Join Date: Sep 2005
- Location: New York, United States
- Posts: 21,843
- Rep Power: 9732
03-20-2008, 04:43 PM #24
03-20-2008, 05:02 PM #25"I am free, no matter what rules surround me. If I find them tolerable, I tolerate them; if I find them too obnoxious, I break them. I am free because I know that I alone am morally responsible for everything I do." - Professor Bernardo de la Paz
"All restraints upon man's natural liberty, not necessary for the simple maintenance of justice, are of the nature of slavery, and differ from each other only in degree. - Lysander Spooner"
03-20-2008, 05:03 PM #26
03-20-2008, 05:08 PM #27
03-20-2008, 05:13 PM #28
03-20-2008, 05:14 PM #29
03-20-2008, 05:17 PM #30
How to become a Hitman...
Step 1. Get your mind prepared for mental flexing (meditation, breathing exercise, rest)
Step 2. Go to your nearest library.
Step 3. Look for a book title "I am a Hitman"
Step 4. Enjoy your journey.
Butterfly in the sky, I can go twice as high
Take a look, it's in a book - Reading Rainbow
I can be anything!
Take a look, it's in a book - Reading Rainbow....
Last edited by Krokem; 03-20-2008 at 05:22 PM.Raiders