*RANT* guys staring at the gym

[halfmoongirl]

I'm so sick of guys staring when I squat/deadlift/decline bench/etc. For my weight (although I guess I look about 15 lbs lighter?), I'm not really even lifting an impressive amount. And for the record, I don't wear revealing or skin-tight clothes (can't wait for the day when I feel confident enough and look good enough to do that... *sigh*). The other day I was DL'ing between 135-165 and there was this one guy who just stood by me and stared with a smile on his face. I can't tell if they're just amused to see a (short, chubby, not muscular) girl lifting heavy weights, they're entertained by the novelty, or if they're thinking 'oh isn't it cute this little girl is trying to get strong' or something? WTF?! And when I was squatting I can see in the mirror these two guys behind me looking at me and then smiling at each other. Look, I'm not hot, I know that, I'm not there for attention, I'M NOT THERE FOR YOU TO LOOK AT!!

Don't get me wrong, I love lifting so I'm going to keep on doing it, but I just don't understand why guys stare. I don't even mind if they look or look impressed, but what's up with the smiling?! I feel like they're laughing at me, either amused that I'm weak but trying to get stronger, or laughing because they think I'm too fat to be lifting weights (like one guy who approached me a few months ago basically told me).

/rant

[CaliSun]

(like one guy who approached me a few months ago basically told me)

Dafuq is this op?

And you never told us what happened to that one guy... Disappointed.

[LoveMyInk]

Because no one has ever posted this topic before

[halfmoongirl]

Dafuq is this op?

And you never told us what happened to that one guy... Disappointed.

When I first started working out there, a guy approached me and gave me a lecture about how a pound is 3500 calories blah blah blah, there are other things you could be doing to burn more calories (pointed to the treadmills). I got over it, but it makes me angry thinking about how he would NEVER have said something like that to me if I was a typical skinny fat, who actually do waste their time at the gym because they can afford to.

That one guy and I are getting along fine. But our weekday schedules don't match up so we can't go to the gym at the same time.

[SultanaK]

Just pay attention to yourself and keep doing your thing. Pretty soon, the regulars will get you aren't messing around.

[Karl_Hungus]

Trust me, it is all in your head. Nobody is staring at you. Most people are too focused on their own routine to care about what other people are doing.

[LoveMyInk]

Ummmm thanks for the gray square

[halfmoongirl]

Ummmm thanks for the gray square

thanks for the useless comments.

[Kemo1990]

maybe people are just spacing out, i know ill stare at people and not mean to while im doing my 5x10, and not a single **** is given

[sippiboy1987]

I noticed this alot at the gym. I just shake my head at how creepy this looks. Cant imagine what the women go through when they notice guys just staring. Not all are like that though. Some guys just admire women who lift

[kimm4]

Trust me, it is all in your head. Nobody is staring at you. Most people are too focused on their own routine to care about what other people are doing.

This^^

Seriously if you're taking the time to notice everything going on around you, you're not training hard enough...

[Damyt01]

This^^

Seriously if you're taking the time to notice everything going on around you, you're not training hard enough...

I agree.... if you notice people around you - lift a heavier weight you will soon forget about them!

[latebloomingmom]

you are a girl squatting..they will notice this in passing if you are one of only a handful of girls in the gym doing this..
build that thick skin and do what you need to do






now why you think they smiling?

[Ion26]

Because no one has ever posted this topic before

You enjoy getting eye ****ed dont you? Turns you on?

[anjanjanja]

Trust me, it is all in your head. Nobody is staring at you. Most people are too focused on their own routine to care about what other people are doing.

and I assume that you are a guy? This does happen all the time and it is not in her head.

[anjanjanja]

this is the thing I hate about gyms.

I guess I am considered to be good looking and I get this all the time. I dont think that the guys even know that they are doing it, its just in their nature to stare when a girl bends over.

I am not okay with it and I get effected by it. Wish I could just ignore them but I cant. It has made me join an all womens gym and when I do go to co-ed gyms I find a corner to hide in.


but I guess its like who ever said that the regulars will get used to you beeign there and they will stop staring.

[drive805]

true some guys stare its their thing (perv,loser,whatever)i guess..... its a shame that your feeling that way. just keep at it....... i look to see if help is needed or to give pointers if they want. I enjoy watching a women trying their best to improve thats cool! to the guy that approched you ...what a tool .... work hard for you, get better, and leave them in the dust ....good luck keep at it...:-)

[acrawlingchaos]

this is the thing I hate about gyms.

I guess I am considered to be good looking and I get this all the time. I dont think that the guys even know that they are doing it, its just in their nature to stare when a girl bends over.

I am not okay with it and I get effected by it. Wish I could just ignore them but I cant. It has made me join an all womens gym and when I do go to co-ed gyms I find a corner to hide in.


but I guess its like who ever said that the regulars will get used to you beeign there and they will stop staring.

It's a public place... people watch people. I've caught both men and wome watching me in the gym. Why do you assume it's always something perverse? I don't....

If you are at a point were you are hiding in a corner, you are paying FAR to much attention to what everyone else is doing. You are that person watching other people (making sure they don't watch you). I'm sorry, but you come off as hypersensitive. I would be weirded out if some paranoid woman was staring at me from a corner.

[Newbie79]

You just have to get used to it and stop caring. I know I get it but I don't really care. I never see any of them in my day to day life. I'm new to all of this and can hardly lift anything but everyone has to start somewhere.

Can't wait til I'm eventually lifting ****loads then they can all have something to stare at lol!!

Toughen up and stop giving too hoots, men will be men, wherever there's a woman they will stare!!

Just focus on yourself and what your trying to achieve - for noone else but yourself!!

[medjen]

and I assume that you are a guy? This does happen all the time and it is not in her head.

When I worked out in a public gym, this NEVER happened to me.

Or I was too busy working out to notice.

[LaDonnaMF]

[danap3681]

It's a public place... people watch people. I've caught both men and wome watching me in the gym. Why do you assume it's always something perverse? I don't....

If you are at a point were you are hiding in a corner, you are paying FAR to much attention to what everyone else is doing. You are that person watching other people (making sure they don't watch you). I'm sorry, but you come off as hypersensitive. I would be weirded out if some paranoid woman was staring at me from a corner.

I agree!! Not all people stare because they want to screw you or because you are so HOT! Maybe they are watching your form to make sure you don't injure yourself. Years ago I was on a machine and did not have my arms far enough out to work the correct muscles. I noticed this guy looking at me then he came over and showed me how to do it correctly. We were workout partners for 2 years after that.

**And it sounds to me like you like the attention. Go figure!

[caramello029]

We all get stared at in the gym. Maybe they are checking your form, Or maybe the weight your using. Not all guys at the gym are pervs. Some try to help others. Could be a sign of respect" like wow she putting in some work on the squats". People look at me rather it be a heavy set or getting a drink of water. People stare are they in between sets then that's normal. I do it also, it called passing time.

[amazon22]

I'm so sick of guys staring when I squat/deadlift/decline bench/etc. For my weight (although I guess I look about 15 lbs lighter?), I'm not really even lifting an impressive amount. And for the record, I don't wear revealing or skin-tight clothes (can't wait for the day when I feel confident enough and look good enough to do that... *sigh*). The other day I was DL'ing between 135-165 and there was this one guy who just stood by me and stared with a smile on his face. I can't tell if they're just amused to see a (short, chubby, not muscular) girl lifting heavy weights, they're entertained by the novelty, or if they're thinking 'oh isn't it cute this little girl is trying to get strong' or something? WTF?! And when I was squatting I can see in the mirror these two guys behind me looking at me and then smiling at each other. Look, I'm not hot, I know that, I'm not there for attention, I'M NOT THERE FOR YOU TO LOOK AT!!

Don't get me wrong, I love lifting so I'm going to keep on doing it, but I just don't understand why guys stare. I don't even mind if they look or look impressed, but what's up with the smiling?! I feel like they're laughing at me, either amused that I'm weak but trying to get stronger, or laughing because they think I'm too fat to be lifting weights (like one guy who approached me a few months ago basically told me).

/rant

Trust me, many guys stare because they are amazed at seeing a woman do something other than jog miles on a treadmill. A lot of guys are not used to seeing women do the big lifts like squat, deadlift, bench, etc. I know I am the only chick in my entire gym that deadlifts and squats heavy weight. I get stares every single day. It doesn't bother me at all, I think of it as they're just MIRIN' super hard! Just focus on what you're doing and don't take the stares too seriously. You can't change what other people think or do, so the best you can do is focus on yourself and what you came to the gym for.

[wakechica]

Wow.

Get over it OP. If you can't cope with being looked, at get a home gym with lots of mirrors so you can stare at yourself.

I'd start taking it as a freaking compliment and stop going mad over people having a look.

Hey OP, why not just make their day and smile back.

[Michelle_Rose]

sometimes i smile at men at the gym. they probably think i want them, but im just trying to be nice. but sometimes, i stare at men because they are hot.

im a perv. sorry.

[erinlee01]

this is the thing I hate about gyms.

I guess I am considered to be good looking and I get this all the time. I dont think that the guys even know that they are doing it, its just in their nature to stare when a girl bends over.

I am not okay with it and I get effected by it. Wish I could just ignore them but I cant. It has made me join an all womens gym and when I do go to co-ed gyms I find a corner to hide in.


but I guess its like who ever said that the regulars will get used to you beeign there and they will stop staring.

Oh, great! It's been at least a week since someone made an "I'm so hot all the guys stare at me" post!


Agreed with some of the others - it's doubtful anyone is getting the attention they think they are. It's human nature to look around and watch people. Maybe they are impressed that you're doing real lifts. Maybe they are amused. Maybe they just happen to be looking at something that is over in your direction.

Who cares? I went to a gym for years and rarely noticed anyone looking at me, though my husband assures me it happens. I just got into the zone when I was there and didn't notice a thing.

[Fawnl]

I'm so sick of guys staring when I squat/deadlift/decline bench/etc. For my weight (although I guess I look about 15 lbs lighter?), I'm not really even lifting an impressive amount. And for the record, I don't wear revealing or skin-tight clothes (can't wait for the day when I feel confident enough and look good enough to do that... *sigh*). The other day I was DL'ing between 135-165 and there was this one guy who just stood by me and stared with a smile on his face. I can't tell if they're just amused to see a (short, chubby, not muscular) girl lifting heavy weights, they're entertained by the novelty, or if they're thinking 'oh isn't it cute this little girl is trying to get strong' or something? WTF?! And when I was squatting I can see in the mirror these two guys behind me looking at me and then smiling at each other. Look, I'm not hot, I know that, I'm not there for attention, I'M NOT THERE FOR YOU TO LOOK AT!!

Don't get me wrong, I love lifting so I'm going to keep on doing it, but I just don't understand why guys stare. I don't even mind if they look or look impressed, but what's up with the smiling?! I feel like they're laughing at me, either amused that I'm weak but trying to get stronger, or laughing because they think I'm too fat to be lifting weights (like one guy who approached me a few months ago basically told me).

/rant

I just have to say, first of all, good for you for lifting. I know how uncomfortable this is. It took me a good month before I would tackle the free weights because of the dudes. But I figured out the trick.

When this kind of thing happens, you stop, put down your bar, turn around and look them STRAIGHT in the eye. One of 2 things will probably happen. They will approach you and tell you why they are looking so hard at you (Most people are impressed that your putting yourself out there and trying to better yourself) OR they will quickly turn around and run away because you have faced them off and it will probably never happen again.

Don't worry. You rock. I'm impressed by your DL'ing 135-165!

[kaleida]

Nobody stares at me in the gym...I think they're scared of me

[aristomeow]

How are you noticing their stares unless you're clearly distracted from your workout?

Seriously, the building could be on fire when i'm squatting and I probably wouldn't notice. There is some heavy azz weight on your shoulders, it ain't the cotdamn time to be watching other peoples reactions to your presence.