I can't get over this girl from work, this sucks.

JAGERBOY · 10-21-2006, 06:04 AM

So if you guys remember, a few months back I posted how this girl I was seeing started acting weird and couldnt figure it out. Well, I havent talked to her in literally 3 months. I go into work and act as if she doesnt exist, but I have to walk by her desk every day to get to mine. The other day I walked past the bathroom just as she was coming out, which was weird because she was right behind me and we didnt say a word to eachother.

Anyways, since Ive stopped talking to her, Ive basically buried myself in school, weightlifting and MMA training. Its been going good, I got my diet back on track, Im setting PR's and feeling better. Also, since then, I have banged 3 girls, one of which I started kinda talking to, but she lives 2 hours away and it just wouldnt have worked so we stopped talking. Ive gotten plenty of numbers as well, so I definilty havent been moping, Ive gone out with friends and have met new girls. So essentially, Ive done everything you are supposed to do to get over someone, focus on other aspects of life, and also meet new girls.

But lately, Ive been getting those feelings back for this girl, and the thing that sucks is, I know she has a new boyfriend cuz she has a picture of her and this dude kissing on her desk, I noticed this when I walked by a few weeks ago, I usually avoid that side of the building like the plague. Also the other day she had a big thing of roses on her desk as well.

I guess theres no answer for me, just needed to vent, but this sucks bad. Im still tempted sometimes to ask her what the **** even happened between us, but I know thats a bad idea. But Im telling you guys, its hell having to see a girl you really liked every single day. I mean, Im not crying over her or about to commit suicide but its just a constant ****ty feeling inside when Im at work or if something reminds me of her.

I dont know what else I can do, and its seems like for the amount of time we were seeing eachother (3 months) I should have gotten over her already, I usually NEVER take this long to get over a girl.

Vante · 10-21-2006, 06:15 AM

Hold ur chin up bro!

It seems to me like u havent had any closure with this girl ...

Maybe u even actually fear it !!!

Dude u need to go get closure... U need to go into her side of the office... Thats right I am telling u to go get that plague, fall sick !! U know why ? Because closure might suck, it might even get ugly... But u need to do it ! Why ? Because, just like ur body produces antibodies against a virus, so will ur heart... Pretty soon u will be stronger then ever... U could finally unload that burden off ur shoulders and breathe easy....

So its been 3 months, so she might think ur wierd !!!Who the hell cares ? I ve read ur posts in the R/P section, believe me, u r wierd!!

Just go upto her one day and tell her
"U know we've practically been ignoring each other for the past 3 months, and we have some history... And I just wanted to......" And then continue on with what u have to say....
Once its out ... U ll feel alot better...

Thatman · 10-21-2006, 06:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JAGERBOY

So if you guys remember, a few months back I posted how this girl I was seeing started acting weird and couldnt figure it out. Well, I havent talked to her in literally 3 months. I go into work and act as if she doesnt exist, but I have to walk by her desk every day to get to mine. The other day I walked past the bathroom just as she was coming out, which was weird because she was right behind me and we didnt say a word to eachother.

Anyways, since Ive stopped talking to her, Ive basically buried myself in school, weightlifting and MMA training. Its been going good, I got my diet back on track, Im setting PR's and feeling better. Also, since then, I have banged 3 girls, one of which I started kinda talking to, but she lives 2 hours away and it just wouldnt have worked so we stopped talking. Ive gotten plenty of numbers as well, so I definilty havent been moping, Ive gone out with friends and have met new girls. So essentially, Ive done everything you are supposed to do to get over someone, focus on other aspects of life, and also meet new girls.

But lately, Ive been getting those feelings back for this girl, and the thing that sucks is, I know she has a new boyfriend cuz she has a picture of her and this dude kissing on her desk, I noticed this when I walked by a few weeks ago, I usually avoid that side of the building like the plague. Also the other day she had a big thing of roses on her desk as well.

I guess theres no answer for me, just needed to vent, but this sucks bad. Im still tempted sometimes to ask her what the **** even happened between us, but I know thats a bad idea. But Im telling you guys, its hell having to see a girl you really liked every single day. I mean, Im not crying over her or about to commit suicide but its just a constant ****ty feeling inside when Im at work or if something reminds me of her.

I dont know what else I can do, and its seems like for the amount of time we were seeing eachother (3 months) I should have gotten over her already, I usually NEVER take this long to get over a girl.

Oh my good lord, I will tell you this bro the day a girl ever makes me feel like that is the day i realise somewhere along the line i have been suckered. Forget her walk were you want in the building do not aviod her shes not in your life shes not your responsibility and you dont owe her ****, be proud and bold and make her see this.

JAGERBOY · 10-21-2006, 06:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Thatman

Oh my good lord, I will tell you this bro the day a girl ever makes me feel like that is the day i realise somewhere along the line i have been suckered. Forget her walk were you want in the building do not aviod her shes not in your life shes not your responsibility and you dont owe her ****, be proud and bold and make her see this.

Well, I may have over exaggerated, there are still situations where I need to walk over there, and I do, but for the most part, I steer clear, dont really want to see her at all. But yes, I do let her see that Im doing my own thing.

Itchy Nads · 10-21-2006, 07:02 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Thatman

Oh my good lord, I will tell you this bro the day a girl ever makes me feel like that is the day i realise somewhere along the line i have been suckered. Forget her walk were you want in the building do not aviod her shes not in your life shes not your responsibility and you dont owe her ****, be proud and bold and make her see this.

Will your advice change when it becomes apparent this chick doesn't give a ****?

nognig · 10-21-2006, 07:12 AM

Holy ****, what a great example of why you shouldn't date someone at work.

She has a picture of her and her new boyfriend kissing on her desk? LOL! That was purely for your sake.

NN

JAGERBOY · 10-21-2006, 07:14 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nognig

Holy ****, what a great example of why you shouldn't date someone at work.

She has a picture of her and her new boyfriend kissing on her desk? LOL! That was purely for your sake.

NN

Might be, although, you cant see it unless you walk around the other side of her desk, where I typically dont go, we are in cubicles, not totally viewable desks.

rawdeal · 10-21-2006, 07:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JAGERBOY

So if you guys remember, a few months back I posted how this girl I was seeing started acting weird and couldnt figure it out. Well, I havent talked to her in literally 3 months. I go into work and act as if she doesnt exist, but I have to walk by her desk every day to get to mine. The other day I walked past the bathroom just as she was coming out, which was weird because she was right behind me and we didnt say a word to eachother.

Anyways, since Ive stopped talking to her, Ive basically buried myself in school, weightlifting and MMA training. Its been going good, I got my diet back on track, Im setting PR's and feeling better. Also, since then, I have banged 3 girls, one of which I started kinda talking to, but she lives 2 hours away and it just wouldnt have worked so we stopped talking. Ive gotten plenty of numbers as well, so I definilty havent been moping, Ive gone out with friends and have met new girls. So essentially, Ive done everything you are supposed to do to get over someone, focus on other aspects of life, and also meet new girls.

But lately, Ive been getting those feelings back for this girl, and the thing that sucks is, I know she has a new boyfriend cuz she has a picture of her and this dude kissing on her desk, I noticed this when I walked by a few weeks ago, I usually avoid that side of the building like the plague. Also the other day she had a big thing of roses on her desk as well.

I guess theres no answer for me, just needed to vent, but this sucks bad. Im still tempted sometimes to ask her what the **** even happened between us, but I know thats a bad idea. But Im telling you guys, its hell having to see a girl you really liked every single day. I mean, Im not crying over her or about to commit suicide but its just a constant ****ty feeling inside when Im at work or if something reminds me of her.

I dont know what else I can do, and its seems like for the amount of time we were seeing eachother (3 months) I should have gotten over her already, I usually NEVER take this long to get over a girl.

Thats hard just dont give a **** and things should be alright.

Crimson-M · 10-21-2006, 10:01 AM

Jager, you've got a good head on your shoulders. I know it sucks that you have to constantly see someone you care about; worst thing is that you can't tell them how you feel. If you can cope with it, then get on with your life. If it's that bad, that you think about her when you're outside of work or something then I suggest you follow Vante's advice and get some closure--he's right, it'll probably be ugly but better days will be on the horizon.

Maybe you're attracted to her because she's unavailable, you probably want what you don't have.

JAGERBOY · 10-22-2006, 09:12 PM

Bump.

TheAustrianOak · 10-22-2006, 10:22 PM

they probably wouldnt find her body if you tossed it in the janitors closet

just sayin'

Need2ShapeUp · 10-22-2006, 11:56 PM

No advice for you I'm afraid. I'm in the same boat. Too bad there wasn't some way to delete people from your thoughts/memory. Not fun being in close proximity with someone that brings out feelings in you.

mandy456 · 10-23-2006, 02:14 PM

get over it or get a new job

JAGERBOY · 10-23-2006, 02:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mandy456

get over it or get a new job

Oh, thats it.

SiNiStEr94 · 10-23-2006, 02:39 PM

I didn't read your previous thread, so I'm curious as to why you stopped seeing her? You say she was acting weird but were you the one to stop contacting her, or was it the other way?

BTW How do you like your MMA training? I myself start Muay Thai today and eventually I wanna cross train into BJJ.

JAGERBOY · 10-23-2006, 02:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SiNiStEr94

I didn't read your previous thread, so I'm curious as to why you stopped seeing her? You say she was acting weird but were you the one to stop contacting her, or was it the other way?

BTW How do you like your MMA training? I myself start Muay Thai today and eventually I wanna cross train into BJJ.

In short, she persued me at first, we had a great time together, she hinted about moving in with me and that she was falling in love, at first I was kinda standoffish, then I started getting the same feelings. Then randomly she started breaking plans and stuff with lame excuses. She was obviously seeing someone else. So I stopped talking to her altogether.

MMA training is awesome, keeps you in shape, and gives you confidence in case something goes down in the streets. Go into it humble as possible, Muay Thai is killer for cardio and conditioning.

mcxk · 10-23-2006, 03:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JAGERBOY

In short, she persued me at first, we had a great time together, she hinted about moving in with me and that she was falling in love, at first I was kinda standoffish, then I started getting the same feelings. Then randomly she started breaking plans and stuff with lame excuses. She was obviously seeing someone else. So I stopped talking to her altogether.

MMA training is awesome, keeps you in shape, and gives you confidence in case something goes down in the streets. Go into it humble as possible, Muay Thai is killer for cardio and conditioning.

she sounds like an inconsiderate selfish hoe. Consider it a good thing she is out of your life bro. If you can work something with a new girl then you will forget about her in no time.

coontang · 10-23-2006, 04:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JAGERBOY

Well, I may have over exaggerated, there are still situations where I need to walk over there, and I do, but for the most part, I steer clear, dont really want to see her at all. But yes, I do let her see that Im doing my own thing.

I hate awkward **** like that. I wouldn't avoid her though. Rather if you cross paths I would make eye contact and give a polite hello and go on your way. Act like you don't think there is anything going on between you two.

TheBody7 · 10-23-2006, 05:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JAGERBOY

So if you guys remember, a few months back I posted how this girl I was seeing started acting weird and couldnt figure it out. Well, I havent talked to her in literally 3 months. I go into work and act as if she doesnt exist, but I have to walk by her desk every day to get to mine. The other day I walked past the bathroom just as she was coming out, which was weird because she was right behind me and we didnt say a word to eachother.

Anyways, since Ive stopped talking to her, Ive basically buried myself in school, weightlifting and MMA training. Its been going good, I got my diet back on track, Im setting PR's and feeling better. Also, since then, I have banged 3 girls, one of which I started kinda talking to, but she lives 2 hours away and it just wouldnt have worked so we stopped talking. Ive gotten plenty of numbers as well, so I definilty havent been moping, Ive gone out with friends and have met new girls. So essentially, Ive done everything you are supposed to do to get over someone, focus on other aspects of life, and also meet new girls.

But lately, Ive been getting those feelings back for this girl, and the thing that sucks is, I know she has a new boyfriend cuz she has a picture of her and this dude kissing on her desk, I noticed this when I walked by a few weeks ago, I usually avoid that side of the building like the plague. Also the other day she had a big thing of roses on her desk as well.

I guess theres no answer for me, just needed to vent, but this sucks bad. Im still tempted sometimes to ask her what the **** even happened between us, but I know thats a bad idea. But Im telling you guys, its hell having to see a girl you really liked every single day. I mean, Im not crying over her or about to commit suicide but its just a constant ****ty feeling inside when Im at work or if something reminds me of her.

I dont know what else I can do, and its seems like for the amount of time we were seeing eachother (3 months) I should have gotten over her already, I usually NEVER take this long to get over a girl.

where is the first post about it so I read that first to give my advice.

JAGERBOY · 10-23-2006, 05:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheBody7

where is the first post about it so I read that first to give my advice.

I dont know if you want to, it went on foreverrrrrr....

http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=825124

TheBody7 · 10-23-2006, 05:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JAGERBOY

I dont know if you want to, it went on foreverrrrrr....

http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=825124

i like reading about it, thats why im here

TheBody7 · 10-23-2006, 05:58 PM

ok.. two things.

First when you said you didn't want a relationship, she probably really liked you that whole time. You were kinda backing off so she was putting so much energy into it.Sometimes when you work so hard for something, you decided it wasn't all it was hyped up to be in the end.

What happened was she met the guy in the mean time, thinking you didn't want her that way. That's where guys make the mistake. Sometime girls get treated like that so often that they get fed up after a while. This guy probabaly gave her what she needed from the begining so she didn't have to put all her energy into it so there was no let down in the end.

For me there are two different likes.
The one where it is mutual and we both click right away and I don't have to work so hard. I usually don't loose interest fast.
The other where I THINK i like him more then I do because there is a chase. Thats where the let down comes in and I back off at any sign of interest.

Your best bet is to talk to her, ask her what went wrong. Say you understand and want to be friends with her again and hang out or be cool. Then be there as friends untill she breaks up with her guy and she has you which she developed a friendship for and will hopefully realize she liked you all along.

JAGERBOY · 10-23-2006, 06:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheBody7

ok.. two things.

First when you said you didn't want a relationship, she probably really liked you that whole time. You were kinda backing off so she was putting so much energy into it.Sometimes when you work so hard for something, you decided it wasn't all it was hyped up to be in the end.

What happened was she met the guy in the mean time, thinking you didn't want her that way. That's where guys make the mistake. Sometime girls get treated like that so often that they get fed up after a while. This guy probabaly gave her what she needed from the begining so she didn't have to put all her energy into it so there was no let down in the end.

For me there are two different likes.
The one where it is mutual and we both click right away and I don't have to work so hard. I usually don't loose interest fast.
The other where I THINK i like him more then I do because there is a chase. Thats where the let down comes in and I back off at any sign of interest.

Your best bet is to talk to her, ask her what went wrong. Say you understand and want to be friends with her again and hang out or be cool. Then be there as friends untill she breaks up with her guy and she has you which she developed a friendship for and will hopefully realize she liked you all along.

Oh, so you're a girl, cool, even better. Thanks for the advice, sounds like a pretty good guess on what possibly happened.

TheBody7 · 10-23-2006, 06:10 PM

look...there is nothing wrong with you. The let down is natural. It's like comming off of drugs...There is no way around it. If you approahed the situation differently, things would've been better.