Just wanna have your thoughts on this(big text ahead)

[W.I.N.]

That's gonna be pretty long, if you have the patience to read and comment, specially if you're experienced on relationships, I'd appreciate it.
And I'd like not to be told I'm 17 and I shouldn't be in a relationship now, as I already know of it but I really like this girl. Here it goes:



I met this girl on MSN suddenly on a weekend, she was in her old msn which she had just remembered the password she had forgotten for some time. I don't know if she was the one to add me or if it was me that add her as my contact but it didn't matter. She sent me her Orkut(kinda like myspace, more used around here in Brazil). She's not HOT with a big ass and huge legs or anything, she's really thin and short, 19 years old but looks more like 17, she comes from another city to study, she lives with a friend of hers, she lives something like 30m away from me(strong unsure estimative, but it's really near). She got my attention coz I like small girls, I'm short and not that big also so I feel better with smaller girls, but then I noticed she had a boyfriend.

Ok I'm not an as*hole and I don't like hitting on chicks that have a boyfriend, but still we talked. As I got to know her better she told me her boyfriend was acting quite cold with her lately, I was helping her get through it and hoping they would break off so I could get a chance with her. We first met when I went to her home so we would go out and have some fun in a club, but her mom was visiting her and she didn't let her go out, so we talked for a while in front of her house, she was beautiful, and as I had some friends waiting for me to go to the club, I left.

After that she came to my home two times to watch a movie, I didn't try anything coz she was still with her boyfriend. On the weekend after the second time we saw a movie(she was on her home city for the weekend) she came to me on msn and said:

Her: Mind you, that day when I came home my friend started saying things...
Me: Things like what?
Like we got together(don't know if this would be the right term as I'm translating) or something?
Her: Yea things like that
hehe
Me: To tell you the truth... I'd really like to kiss you, but you like your boyfriend don't you?
Her: Ah... I don't know... you know, I like you, really.

And things went on, not much different than the conversation above, she came here one more time, and this time I hugged her while we were watching the movie, at the middle of the movie I made an attempt to kiss her, I couldn't stand it, it was bigger than me, she refused, she said it was not right, she was still with her boyfriend. Well I let things be as I thought I understood what she was saying. Next time I saw her I went to her house, we were alone for the next 3 hours, just watching tv and talking, I asked her to break off with her boyfriend, she said she hadn't seen him in a while, I told her to call him, it was that easy. Then when there was only half an hour left I couldn't stand it and tried kissing her once again, we were laying on the sofa and she didn't have much space to run, after a few attempts she was kissing me back and turning her head away fast, then she said:

-Ok I will kiss you one time and then you'll stop.
-Ah, ok - I said
-But it will be only on the lips
-No! I'd got a few of those already just now... you see, you want it too.
-Ah, but it's not right!
-Ah common now...


And I had my kiss, a real one if you know what I mean, after that she sat and said:

-I shouldn't have done that...
-Ah, you liked it.

I made some more attempts and she kept asking "why don't you stop?", I answered, "because you're hot" and a few seconds later I was above her, she said "ok I'll give you one last kiss and then you've gotta go home, my friend's arriving anytime(that friend would come with a boyfriend, which knew her boyfriend and would tell him if he saw me there alone with her)". There was another kiss, it was a long one this time, felt really good. I stood up to go home, kissed her in the lips one more time as saying good bye and went home, feeling really good.

Next day she would come to me and say that she had no doubts anymore, she said I didn't really liked her, because a few days ago I told her I didn't want to be with her >just< because she was hot, and then I told her she was hot she thought I was lying to her all the time, couldn't she understand it was part of it? How the hell did she want me to like her if I didn't want to kiss her and have sex and all? Well I explained that to her(not the sex part, of course, wouldn't fit very well) and she accepted it.

Ok one more week, one more attempt but this time she didn't want it, she was gonna break up with her boyfriend first. I could feel she was lying, she still loved him, what could I do? Then she came telling me they broke up, that was last sunday, her nickname on msn said "Already missing you..." Hell I was pissed, but didn't say anything. She told me her face was ugly from crying when I asked her to come to my place, then I went to hers(her friend was not there). You could really see in her face she'd been crying, we talked for a while and after an hour or something like that I tried kissing her again, she didn't accept it and I asked

-Why not? You already broke up with him, didn't you say you liked me too?
-Look, I don't know if I want to be with anybody now, I just broke up, it was a 10 months relationship.
-But what does it matter? There's nothing hold you anymore, I like you and you say you like me too, I can't understand you.
-Look I don't wanna hurt you
-How are you going to hurt me? Didn't you say you liked me?
-But I like you...

The conversation went like this for like 20min, the same lines, she trying to explain and I telling her I could not understand. It was time for me to go home, I stood up and she did also, we went to the door, and there I started getting closer, as a last hope of getting to kiss her again. She didn't accept it, it went like this for 5min, I got really pissed, gave a slap on the door and said "Well! Bye then", and walked fast from there, she didn't say anything, just closed the door. I went on the net and 15min later she logged in on MSN. I didn't really talk to her, it was her who would have to talk to me, then she came:

-Are you mad at me?
-No, of course not - I lied
I'm just a bit sad, I don't understand you
-But try to understand me
-No, really, I tried, I swear
But I can't
It makes no sense to me
-You know what, I don't wanna hurt you
-Yea, you don't need to repeat it all over again
-You see?
-But I already told you I don't understand, you say you like me, and you don't wanna be with me.
-Try to understand, I broke off today, I won't be with anyone anytime soon, I'm afraid, you know what I suffered
-Yea I could accept that if it was any other random guy, but it's not, it's me!
-I know, but won't be able with anyone now
-You see? We won't go past this, and more, look at your nickname, and you say you don't like him anymore(it was like: "If that's what you want... I've tried everything, but it didn't work... lucky for both of us")
-But try to understand, it's been ten months!
-I'd understand, if you came straight to me and said "I still love him", but not, you come saying you're afraid, you can't seem to tell me the truth when we're facing each other.
-But I didn't lie to you
-Ah ok, Heather(random name)
I've gotta accept it anyway
I can't do anything
-Look
I think I'm going back to my home town
-Does it make a difference if I ask you to stay?
-It does
-Then don't go....
-But I already called my mom
-Then why did you say it would make a difference? I don't want you to go...
-Ok
-Ok?
-Yea I'll try not to leave
-Ah, that's good... it felt really bad, thinking I'd never see you again...
-Yea, I thought about that too
-I really want we to be together someday, when you have no doubts on what you want
-Me too, but as of now, I can't.

[W.I.N.]

The next day I didn't talk to her much, as usual, I thought maybe if I did that she would care, and if she didn't I'd be sure she didn't like me as much as I liked her. Then she came:

-Hey, did you think about all I told you last night?
-What do you mean?
-All the things I told you
-Well I did think about it, but I still don't understand, all I understand is that it's the way you want things to be.
-No
It's not the way I want
I just ask you for some more time
-It's hard you know
I keep thinking, you'd rather be with him(her ex boyfriend) than with me
And I can't do anything
And what if you get together again?
-No, we'll not.
-And what about that nickname?
-Ah, I just put it there for the act of it(like it didn't really mean anything... yea right)
Yesterday when you left, I was really sad
-Me too, and we could've ended the day much better
-I know, but look, give me some more time, if you don't want to, it's ok, I'll understand
-Of course I wanna give you more time
But it would be good if you didn't take that long, you know.
-I won't take long, you can be sure of it.
-Oh fine.
-But like, if you have to be with someone else, don't mind me.
-Have?
Why would I have to be with someone else?
Didn't I tell you?
I don't want anyone else but you
-You did, but if you find someone, you know.
-How can you think this way?
Won't you mind if I be with someone else?
-I do mind, but I can't tell you not to be.
-Damn, all I want is you, while I have some chance I won't be with anyone else(I'm not lying)
-Ok, it's your choice.
-I'll go eat somethin, brb
-Few minutes later-
-Are you there?(her)
-I've just came back
-Look
Do you think it'll be too much time for you till when I come back from my home town this weekend?
-Absolutely not
But is this time for you to think
or is it for we to be together?
-For we to be together



Now I just gotta wait, I hope she doesn't change her mind, that'd be pretty mean, and I don't understand why she can't be with me right now, it's really hard having to wait.



Wow that was long

-CLIFFS-

-I knew this random girl on MSN
-She had a boyfriend
-I started liking her
-She says she likes me too
-She broke up with her boyfriend(not because of me, but because he was being cold with her)
-She doesn't want to be with me now and I can't understand why
-She told me to wait till next week for us to be together

[glass shatters]

uve got a chance at it thats for sure id just give her time to think. try not to get too attached but i think u already are because she might get back with her ex. dont fall for her games but i think its lookin like its workin out pretty good and people really do go through those hard times after long relationships so just be patient

[W.I.N.]

Originally Posted by glass shatters

uve got a chance at it thats for sure id just give her time to think. try not to get too attached but i think u already are because she might get back with her ex. dont fall for her games but i think its lookin like its workin out pretty good and people really do go through those hard times after long relationships so just be patient

If she gets back with her ex I'd feel like sh*t, but I'm so used to not being liked by girls I like and having to forget about them I know I'd get through it(huge ego boost from the start of the year to now because of weight lifting, I think that helped at she liking me back, coz otherwise I'd be a fu*king shy guy who would not ever dare to go to her place or invite her over, or to try to kiss her or even talk to her, this whole thing is new to me, as I was with my last gf just because she was hot, now that I think about it, there was not much feelings to it as I thought at the time)
What should I do if she continues not wanting to be with me next week? I've been thinking to try and forget her, but well it's not that easy.

[NOFX ORTIZ]

Think about this. This girl was talking you the whole time she was still with her boyfriend. You were making moves on her and kissing her and stuff. How are you gonna feel IF ya'll get together and she does the same things to you? If she did it with her old boyfriend what makes you think she won't do it to you?

[jalbs]

If a girl likes you she will make out with you. She must have been looking for something else from you, friend maybe? I could be wrong but I have nerver seen a girl that is into a guy not go for it unless it is her first time or she is shy. Move on you will know when she wants it from eye contact and what she touches hopefully you. You can tell all you need to know from the eyes.

[W.I.N.]

Originally Posted by NOFX ORTIZ

Think about this. This girl was talking you the whole time she was still with her boyfriend. You were making moves on her and kissing her and stuff. How are you gonna feel IF ya'll get together and she does the same things to you? If she did it with her old boyfriend what makes you think she won't do it to you?

The fact that she just kissed me when I insisted a lot is what makes me think she won't do it to me, and her boyfriend was cold with her at the moment, a mistake I'll never commit.

[W.I.N.]

Originally Posted by jalbs

If a girl likes you she will make out with you. She must have been looking for something else from you, friend maybe? I could be wrong but I have nerver seen a girl that is into a guy not go for it unless it is her first time or she is shy. Move on you will know when she wants it from eye contact and what she touches hopefully you. You can tell all you need to know from the eyes.

No but there was this one time I asked if it was just that, friendship, that she wanted, she replied saying "no, it's more than that"

[namtaB]

Originally Posted by W.I.N.

No but there was this one time I asked if it was just that, friendship, that she wanted, she replied saying "no, it's more than that"

She's stringing you along.

She doesn't want to put you in the friend zone yet and she doesn't want to take things any further. I suspect that she's biding her time to see what happens with her ex-boyfriend. She's probably waiting to see if he wants to get back together. Despite what she may tell you, this is what I'm reading from her behavior.

[W.I.N.]

Originally Posted by GreatOne21

She's stringing you along.

She doesn't want to put you in the friend zone yet and she doesn't want to take things any further. I suspect that she's biding her time to see what happens with her ex-boyfriend. She's probably waiting to see if he wants to get back together. Despite what she may tell you, this is what I'm reading from her behavior.

Yea I believe this too, but a few days ago she told me her ex's mom called her to talk, she told me about the conversation:

-You know, he talked to me yesterday, he said he regrets it, he was under stress at the moment
-Oh I see
-He really regrets it
-I see
-I see, that's all you have to say?
-What did you want me to say?

I don't know what the hell to think anymore, she just went to her home town and she'll be back on the day after Monday(I don't really know all the week days in english lol). I asked her if I could see her before she left:

-Is there time for me to see you before you go?
-There's not
I'll miss the bus if so, I'm almost leaving.
-Ah, ok, you'll be back on Sunday?
-No, I think I'll be back on the day after Monday
-Ok, we'll meet on the day after Monday then?
-It can be


It can be?? This really made me feel bad...
She lives a 1min walk away from me, it wouldn't take her more than 1min to see me before she left. Sometimes she acts like we're just friends and nothing else, sometimes she acts like she likes me, and I can't do anything but wait till her to come back to be sure if we'll be together. This pisses me off, I feel like she isn't being honest with me, although I told her to do so lots of times before.

[W.I.N.]

Well today we talked as I said we would, it all went bad, really bad, she said she likes me but that she wants to be alone, to go out with her friends, and even though I said I would not prohibit her of going out with her friends or anything she didn't want to be with me.
I tried so hard on the rest of the day not to call her or something, she said she didn't want to loose my friendship but I said it'd be better for me not to be talking to her much anymore, hoping she would care, but she just went like "sorry, but that's it" when I asked if that was really what she wanted. I couldn't stand it and I called her, went to her place for like 2 hours and we just talked about random things, nothing about the conversation we had before. It was so hard not to hug her or something.
Then she started to nudge me on my shoulder saying "roids", meaning she thinks I've been into roids and am muscular(ye you can laugh at her), that turned me on coz of course she did that to feel my shoulder or something, but I didn't try to do anything coz I knew what would happen, she would reject me. Then when I got home and logged in on msn she started saying she doesn't want to do this anymore, for we to meet, that she would not change her mind, she said that wasn't a right thing to do with me, not that she didn't want me there bla bla.

**** why is it so easy for her? If she didn't like me that much why did she say so and give me hopes before? Why the hell does she want to be with her friends rather than me?

All went wrong since I knew this girl, this game she played with me, I've been sleeping in class due to talking to her till late, and I have a test tomorrow which I know I'm gonna get a low grade if I don't manage to study even with all this going on on my head, hell even my bulking went wrong coz I'd not eat on the right times, it's been 2 weeks since I gained some weight.

I feel like crap now, and from experience I know I'll feel better in a month or two if I manage to forget her. I know the right thing to do is to not look for her anymore but that's gonna be really hard to do.

[namtaB]

Originally Posted by W.I.N.

**** why is it so easy for her? If she didn't like me that much why did she say so and give me hopes before? Why the hell does she want to be with her friends rather than me?

Its easy for her b/c she's not emotionally invested in you. But you emotionally invested in her. Don't be so hard on yourself, guys do it all the time. Girls typically invest emotionally into a guy down the road and definitely after they sleep together. Guys on the other hand emotionally invest in a girl when she shows some interest in us.

She got your hopes up b/c that's what girls do. Its part of the game. They do it to feed their need for male attention, build their self-esteem, etc.

She wants to be with her friends b/c that's what she wants right now. She hasn't built any emotion into you so there's nothing holding her back from hanging out with her friends.

All went wrong since I knew this girl, this game she played with me, I've been sleeping in class due to talking to her till late, and I have a test tomorrow which I know I'm gonna get a low grade if I don't manage to study even with all this going on on my head, hell even my bulking went wrong coz I'd not eat on the right times, it's been 2 weeks since I gained some weight.

Learn the lesson bro. Never ever let yourself get emotionally invested into a girl until she is emotionally invested into you first.

And definitely don't put your needs above hers this early in the game.

I feel like crap now, and from experience I know I'll feel better in a month or two if I manage to forget her. I know the right thing to do is to not look for her anymore but that's gonna be really hard to do.

Don't be too hard on yourself. Avoid her and let time do its thing. Start getting back into your routine ASAP.

[W.I.N.]

Originally Posted by GreatOne21

Its easy for her b/c she's not emotionally invested in you. But you emotionally invested in her. Don't be so hard on yourself, guys do it all the time. Girls typically invest emotionally into a guy down the road and definitely after they sleep together. Guys on the other hand emotionally invest in a girl when she shows some interest in us.

She got your hopes up b/c that's what girls do. Its part of the game. They do it to feed their need for male attention, build their self-esteem, etc.

She wants to be with her friends b/c that's what she wants right now. She hasn't built any emotion into you so there's nothing holding her back from hanging out with her friends.



Learn the lesson bro. Never ever let yourself get emotionally invested into a girl until she is emotionally invested into you first.

And definitely don't put your needs above hers this early in the game.



Don't be too hard on yourself. Avoid her and let time do its thing. Start getting back into your routine ASAP.

Ye I know, not letting me get emotionally involved until she's too, but I thought "I like you, really" meant she was already emotionally involved. Live and learn I guess. Thanks for your advice reps

[MILFWNAB]

WIN first let me say Brazilian men are hot. I dated one in my teens and I'll never forget what's-his-name. (Give me a break, I'm old. But I do remember he was hot! LOL)

Also, I can tell you are a great person, kind and try to do the right thing. So I'm going to tell you the truth. She used you to feel good about herself, at a time when she wasn't feeling confident or good about herself because of the bad relationship she was in. She may be nice, she may be good-looking, but trust me, you do not want to be anything except friends with this girl. And probably not even that, because it will be too hard for you.

I have been happily married for almost 12 years, and before that I dated quite a few men. My personal standard for behavior has always been, if I can't tell him about it, I should not be doing it. (Okay, a little harmless flirting every once in awhile being the exception. :-) ) It shows disrespect for the other person and a weak character. And oftentimes things have a way of getting out of hand.

She should not have been alone with you, watching movies, when she had a serious boyfriend of 10 months. And trust me--she knew what she was doing. She probably feels a little bit bad about leading on such a nice man (you), but she loves too much how you make her feel good about herself to stop. You do not need that. Move on. Seriously. There is an 80% chance she will never be your girlfriend, and even if she does, there is a 100% chance it will turn out very badly for you.

I'm sorry to say that. I can tell you are a good person. I'm not going to give you some BS about "You are still young," etc. but let me tell you. When I was in high school I was chubby, not very good looking, and no boys liked me at all. The last year or so I changed a lot, lost weight, toned up, etc. but by then it was too late. But when I went away to university everything changed. Suddenly I was considered quite a good catch and had my pick of great guys to date. (Alright, after 4 kids I'm chubby again. But I'm working on it. And I'm happily married to a man who is crazy about me, fit or pudgy. LOL) Things will turn out wonderful for you too.

Give yourself (and the girls you know) a couple years. By the time they're in their early 20's they'll be able to recognize how great you are. I have a feeling it won't even take that long. By the time you're 20 you'll be having to change your telephone number to get the girls to stop calling! And you'll be the envy of your friends because you'll be the one getting the hot, older girls (like 23-25) who are smart enough to appreciate you. But please--don't ever get into a serious relationship with someone whose morals are quite different than yours, no matter how nice or cute she is. (In other words, does things that you would not do because you don't think they're right--lie, cheat, watch movies alone with boys who have a crush on them . . .)

I know that's hard to believe right now, but some day you will know that I was right. And please--believe what I say from the bottom of my heart--that girl is no good for you. Not saying she is a bad person, just immature and inconsiderate. Move on!

[W.I.N.]

Originally Posted by MILFWNAB

WIN first let me say Brazilian men are hot. I dated one in my teens and I'll never forget what's-his-name. (Give me a break, I'm old. But I do remember he was hot! LOL)

Also, I can tell you are a great person, kind and try to do the right thing. So I'm going to tell you the truth. She used you to feel good about herself, at a time when she wasn't feeling confident or good about herself because of the bad relationship she was in. She may be nice, she may be good-looking, but trust me, you do not want to be anything except friends with this girl. And probably not even that, because it will be too hard for you.

I have been happily married for almost 12 years, and before that I dated quite a few men. My personal standard for behavior has always been, if I can't tell him about it, I should not be doing it. (Okay, a little harmless flirting every once in awhile being the exception. :-) ) It shows disrespect for the other person and a weak character. And oftentimes things have a way of getting out of hand.

She should not have been alone with you, watching movies, when she had a serious boyfriend of 10 months. And trust me--she knew what she was doing. She probably feels a little bit bad about leading on such a nice man (you), but she loves too much how you make her feel good about herself to stop. You do not need that. Move on. Seriously. There is an 80% chance she will never be your girlfriend, and even if she does, there is a 100% chance it will turn out very badly for you.

I'm sorry to say that. I can tell you are a good person. I'm not going to give you some BS about "You are still young," etc. but let me tell you. When I was in high school I was chubby, not very good looking, and no boys liked me at all. The last year or so I changed a lot, lost weight, toned up, etc. but by then it was too late. But when I went away to university everything changed. Suddenly I was considered quite a good catch and had my pick of great guys to date. (Alright, after 4 kids I'm chubby again. But I'm working on it. And I'm happily married to a man who is crazy about me, fit or pudgy. LOL) Things will turn out wonderful for you too.

Give yourself (and the girls you know) a couple years. By the time they're in their early 20's they'll be able to recognize how great you are. I have a feeling it won't even take that long. By the time you're 20 you'll be having to change your telephone number to get the girls to stop calling! And you'll be the envy of your friends because you'll be the one getting the hot, older girls (like 23-25) who are smart enough to appreciate you. But please--don't ever get into a serious relationship with someone whose morals are quite different than yours, no matter how nice or cute she is. (In other words, does things that you would not do because you don't think they're right--lie, cheat, watch movies alone with boys who have a crush on them . . .)

I know that's hard to believe right now, but some day you will know that I was right. And please--believe what I say from the bottom of my heart--that girl is no good for you. Not saying she is a bad person, just immature and inconsiderate. Move on!

I'd give you a hug if I could, I agree with you in all points, I've been thinking lately and I'm desperate to finish high school this year and move away to another city to live by myself and attend to college, I think it's gonna be a much different world, I don't like much the kind of people that are in my social life, not that they are bad or anything, just not the kind of people that likes what I like, but my best friend is perfect, the kind of guy you can trust, and have fun with in parties while hitting on girls, he's gonna move with me and I hope we share an apartment or something, he's like a brother to me, it's gonna be great, he helped me a lot with all this girl thing.

About the chubby thing, I've been skinny as hell before, with a little gut, things changed a lot since I started bodybuilding, so I know perfectly what you mean.

Thanks for all the advice, I'm trying not to talk to her much, it's gonna be better for me, one thing I'll not do as you said is reject her if those 20% chance become true because I really like her, it's not something you can control now is it?


Reps on the way(gotta recharge)

[-bt11]

IMHO GTFO seriously she seems like a confusing girl. I know exactly what kind of situation u were in. I was in one similar. looking back I wish I woulda been more Alpha and not seemed so desperate. Best Advice leave her alone and see what she does... BTW PICS???

[W.I.N.]

Originally Posted by -bt11

IMHO GTFO seriously she seems like a confusing girl. I know exactly what kind of situation u were in. I was in one similar. looking back I wish I woulda been more Alpha and not seemed so desperate. Best Advice leave her alone and see what she does... BTW PICS???

Yea I'm already trying not to talk to her much, I'm on on msn and she's also, she starts a conversation sometimes and I just answer till I can stop without sounding rude or something. I'm trying not to think much about her, coz it really hurts





She's not the hottest in the world, but she's just my kind of girl and she's nice.

EDIT: lol why isn't embedding working?

[W.I.N.]

Ok she talked to me on msn five minutes ago and the conversation went like this:

-Are you mad at me?
-No, I'm not, why?
-You're not talking to me anymore.
-Well, what I feel about you hasn't changed, it's hard for me to keep on talking to you.
-Ah
Ok
Your choice
I'm logging out
See you
-Bye...


Now I'm pretty sure we'll not talk anymore, damn...
Well it's a good thing but I feel bad about it, then I think she didn't really care, just accepted it, she doesn't love me now I'm sure of that.

[kylefields10]

read the confidence thread, it will guide you on what to do

[W.I.N.]

Originally Posted by kylefields10

read the confidence thread, it will guide you on what to do

Well I don't think confidence is my problem at all, but I'll read it anyway thanks

[W.I.N.]

OK update, I was trying not to talk much about it but I can't stand it anymore, I need to talk about it with someone.


After the last events, when she came back from the beach where she spent the weekend, she said she missed me, I went to her house and we were finally together with no problems at all, only problem was she didn't want to tell everyone just yet, I said ok but I was planning to put some pressure on her and all, then the other day when I asked her if we could see again, she told me she was going to a party, I was like what the hell why does she want to be in a party rather than with me, she then told me the truth, she was going to travel to see a city in which she had passed the test to a college there, she lied to me several times, saying she was going to the party, then that she was going to travel to see a city, and just then she told me about the college thing.

I talked to her about how I felt, we discussed some things, the other day she didn't enter on the internet much, and she wasn't talking much to me, she was strange, and then I read a msg someone sent to her on orkut on a fake account:

You got kicked in the ass right?(like got dismissed or something), by your cheated(meaning she cheated on him, don't know the right word) boyfriend !! Now you're after other's boyfriend ... Who didn't have to know about it now does ok !! CAREFUUUL not to be destroyed... you old rat ! Because if someone gets you you don't have the will to handle it, you're gonna get owned, you lazy eyed, bitch ! You gotta understand that in this small city noone does nothing without everyone knowing about it ! Got it?!? There are people watching you, be careful not to be owned ! It's better for you to leave at once, before it gets bad on your side ! But it will get bad anyway, you messed with the wrong person ! Because everyone that hangs with you just wanna **** you ! It's not for nothing that your nickname among them is LILTLE SNACK ! Kisses my friend. Hehe..

Sorry for the lame translation, but that changed everything I thought about her... But I still loved her, actually I still do, when she was 1 day away from getting home, because she went to her hometown after that city for college, and went to parties, I asked her if I could see her when she arrives, she came to me with lots of excuses, I didn't understand, first she said she missed me, then she was all strange and didn't look like she wanted to see me as much as I did, I said I needed to talk to her, she said she needed to also, I said we shouldn't see each other anymore, then it went like this:

She:
-Hehe
That's exactly what I was gonna say...
Me:
-Yea, I felt you didn't want it anymore
Look, I still like you, a lot
But the way things are, it's not good at all

-I like you too
But now I wanna enjoy things

-Ah ok, go enjoy your things
I'm gonna live my life

-Yea
Ball to front(An expression that means "forget the past and live your life")

We haven't talked since, it's not like last time, she doesn't talk to me on msn anymore, and even though now I think she's a bitch, I still miss her, I wish she was a better person, and that she liked me as much as I like her, but that's not gonna happen and I know it, and that's why if she "misses" me again, I'll not fall to it, and I'll not let her play games with me anymore.

I was spying on her orkut just a few minutes earlier and I saw a photo of her and a friend(girl) of hers, with the description "Karlleny: she taught me that for a friendship to be true, it doesn't need to be a long term one, it needs to be the right one...Made me know a person that in just one weekend is now special to me... love you my friend..."
Now she's probably talking about a guy, I checked her msgs, and there it was, a msg from a guy, not a bad looking one(no homo):

-Hey beautiful how are you?!!
I miss you
Kisses
I like you(well it's something more than just like, between like and love I'd say, but I don't think there's a word in english for that)

I checked his profile, and there it was, her first message, and the second responding to the one above:

1st
HI..
You don't need to look for me anymore...
You're added
Loved to know you...
kisses..

2nd
Hi!!!
I'm fine..
What about you?
I miss you too..
Are we going to the beach friday?
I like(same verb as explained before) you too..
Kisses..


NOW I got pissed, and then felt really bad, how can she be such a bitch?! Is it like that for her? I was just someone to pass the time until she finds someone better? Holy **** I feel bad, I wish I could make she feel as bad as I do, but I can't!! I was going so well... I gotta stop spying on her, but it's hard.. I hope this weekend's parties goes well, so I can feel better, I've not been with anyone else since her.

I'd like if you could tell me what to do to make her feel bad or to make me feel better, but I know you can't... damn

[unclejeff]

you need to go out and meet other people. it is the best way imo.

keep your head up. this chick has been playing with your emotions for her own personal benefit. you need to let her go. it will be hard, but like i mentioned before.....start talking to other girls and you will forget about her before you know it.