awkward moment at work

TRUEBLUE83 · 01-31-2005, 07:54 PM

I was taking my after lunch s**t in the bathroom after eating my chicken, rice, broccoli, milk. I had it all to myself and was ready to unleash fury but then the boss comes strolling in, and this ensued:

Boss: "TRUEBLUE, is that you in there?"
TB: Yes
Boss: Great work on that report.. amazing job (enters stall next to me)
TB: Thanks (I am holding in my s**t at this point but ready to blow any minute)

We continue to small talk for a few minutes (he ****s quietly, how the f**k can he do that?!?!) before i couldnt take it anymore and unleashed about 85 grams of protein into the toilet with a catastrophically loud BOOM.

The longest five seconds of silence ensued before the boss asks, "Um... are you ok over there?"

couldnt look him in the eye all day

Wiggy44k · 01-31-2005, 07:55 PM

Is your name really TrueBlue?

earth_AD · 01-31-2005, 07:56 PM

Lol

(o)./^\.(o) · 01-31-2005, 07:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TRUEBLUE83

I was taking my after lunch s**t in the bathroom after eating my chicken, rice, broccoli, milk. I had it all to myself and was ready to unleash fury but then the boss comes strolling in, and this ensued:

Boss: "TRUEBLUE, is that you in there?"
TB: Yes
Boss: Great work on that report.. amazing job (enters stall next to me)
TB: Thanks (I am holding in my s**t at this point but ready to blow any minute)

We continue to small talk for a few minutes (he ****s quietly, how the f**k can he do that?!?!) before i couldnt take it anymore and unleashed about 85 grams of protein into the toilet with a catastrophically loud BOOM.

The longest five seconds of silence ensued before the boss asks, "Um... are you ok over there?"

couldnt look him in the eye all day

Tell him you were murdering a leperchaun.

stix and stones · 01-31-2005, 07:57 PM

lmao. hope it wasn't a stinker. that would've made things a lot worse.

Guerra · 01-31-2005, 09:20 PM

U think thats bad, I was once in the bathroom taking a piss while my boss was in there too, the funny thing is that he used to be a she before having an operation. I was pissin' in the urinal and he was pissin' in the toilet and letting out big yelps as splashes of piss came out his fake penis.

dudeguy · 01-31-2005, 10:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TRUEBLUE83

We continue to small talk for a few minutes (he ****s quietly, how the f**k can he do that?!?!) before i couldnt take it anymore and unleashed about 85 grams of protein into the toilet with a catastrophically loud BOOM.

The longest five seconds of silence ensued before the boss asks, "Um... are you ok over there?"

couldnt look him in the eye all day

LMAO!!

Lord_Nazgul · 01-31-2005, 10:37 PM

Rofl!

DesertHeart · 01-31-2005, 10:43 PM

Should have said "WHO DOES NUMBER 2 WORK FOR?"

xakeP · 01-31-2005, 10:55 PM

lol, like the scene in the move of those 2 black fbi dudes dressed up as chicks where one of them goes to take a crap

ed073 · 01-31-2005, 11:15 PM

piss funny!

jiza101 · 01-31-2005, 11:29 PM

TROLL. Hes a fake !

$AJ · 01-31-2005, 11:50 PM

i got a better one.

I was at work BS'ing around with one of my friends. Anyways, he's talking about this fat chick he's nailing and says something along the lines of 'Man, I need to find a hotter girl to ****. This one's okay, but she's so damn fat; but it's all good for now - i just turn her over, **** that ass then **** her face for a little bit"..... just as he says this the boss's wife walks by

RU_Star · 02-01-2005, 01:15 AM

Why did your parents call you TrueBule?

Ironager · 02-01-2005, 04:11 AM

Haha nice story if it's true.

Laughing at all the people who think his boss really called him TRUEBLUE, you guys have the mental understanding of an apple

Reck · 02-01-2005, 04:52 AM

lmao

Hartski · 02-01-2005, 06:38 AM

You should have used the "Camoflush". You know, flush the stool at the exact time you "unleash fury" to cover the sound.

_Sniper_ · 02-01-2005, 06:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hartski

You should have used the "Camoflush". You know, flush the stool at the exact time you "unleash fury" to cover the sound.

LMAO

canadianpower · 02-01-2005, 07:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TRUEBLUE83

I was taking my after lunch s**t in the bathroom after eating my chicken, rice, broccoli, milk. I had it all to myself and was ready to unleash fury but then the boss comes strolling in, and this ensued:

Boss: "TRUEBLUE, is that you in there?"
TB: Yes
Boss: Great work on that report.. amazing job (enters stall next to me)
TB: Thanks (I am holding in my s**t at this point but ready to blow any minute)

We continue to small talk for a few minutes (he ****s quietly, how the f**k can he do that?!?!) before i couldnt take it anymore and unleashed about 85 grams of protein into the toilet with a catastrophically loud BOOM.

The longest five seconds of silence ensued before the boss asks, "Um... are you ok over there?"

couldnt look him in the eye all day

lol

Chahn · 02-01-2005, 07:10 AM

It's ok, I guess he won't remember it.

Cut Chemist · 02-01-2005, 07:13 AM

hah that made my morning.. now off to work

TRUEBLUE83 · 02-01-2005, 08:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hartski

You should have used the "Camoflush". You know, flush the stool at the exact time you "unleash fury" to cover the sound.

way too loud for that bro

goth666 · 02-01-2005, 08:29 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by xakeP

lol, like the scene in the move of those 2 black fbi dudes dressed up as chicks where one of them goes to take a crap

u talking about "White Chicks"? goddamn that movie sucked.

Hartski · 02-01-2005, 08:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by goth666

u talking about "White Chicks"? goddamn that movie sucked.

I won't even waste the $1.00 to rent that, it looked so bad.

Chi3f · 02-01-2005, 09:20 AM

He he, that's certainly brightened up my afternoon, true or not!

LatsMakeTheMan · 02-01-2005, 09:23 AM

You should have carried on normal conversation while it was exploding......like it was no big deal. He'd be like WTF is up with this guy?

Brufiacci · 02-01-2005, 09:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TRUEBLUE83

I was taking my after lunch s**t in the bathroom after eating my chicken, rice, broccoli, milk. I had it all to myself and was ready to unleash fury but then the boss comes strolling in, and this ensued:

Boss: "TRUEBLUE, is that you in there?"
TB: Yes
Boss: Great work on that report.. amazing job (enters stall next to me)
TB: Thanks (I am holding in my s**t at this point but ready to blow any minute)

We continue to small talk for a few minutes (he ****s quietly, how the f**k can he do that?!?!) before i couldnt take it anymore and unleashed about 85 grams of protein into the toilet with a catastrophically loud BOOM.

The longest five seconds of silence ensued before the boss asks, "Um... are you ok over there?"

couldnt look him in the eye all day

No no no. I have the best crapping story ever.

About 2 years ago I was rushing to the bathroom at work to take a big cruncher. When I got to the bathroom one of the toliets was already plugged up with crap and toliet paper from some others hiroshema. So I went into the other toliet and took care of business. I am about 3/4 through my crap when soem dumbass that had the same idea comes rushing into the washroom. He goes into the other stall and notices that it's plugged up. So he decides to flush it. All of a sudden it doesn't drain and over flows all over the floor. The ****ing prick runs out of the washroom as the toliet water, toliet paper and logs of **** ( which have some kind of nuts in it) make their way into my side of the stall. I immediately yelp and put my feet up not to put it in the surprise on the floor. Now picture this. You have a dirty ass that needs wiping but you can't get up or put your feet down. I don't know how but I managed to wipe my ass. I then stood up on the toliet seat. Flushed my toliet pull up my pants (still standing on the toliet) opened the door to the stall and jumped ovee the crap. One of the most awful moments of my life. I never felt so helpless in my life.

Hartski · 02-01-2005, 09:36 AM

The only proper thing to say in that situation is, "OH, GOD!!! IT BURNS! IT BURNS!!!!"

LatsMakeTheMan · 02-01-2005, 09:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Brufiacci

No no no. I have the best crapping story ever.

About 2 years ago I was rushing to the bathroom at work to take a big cruncher. When I got to the bathroom one of the toliets was already plugged up with crap and toliet paper from some others hiroshema. So I went into the other toliet and took care of business. I am about 3/4 through my crap when soem dumbass that had the same idea comes rushing into the washroom. He goes into the other stall and notices that it's plugged up. So he decides to flush it. All of a sudden it doesn't drain and over flows all over the floor. The ****ing prick runs out of the washroom as the toliet water, toliet paper and logs of **** ( which have some kind of nuts in it) make their way into my side of the stall. I immediately yelp and put my feet up not to put it in the surprise on the floor. Now picture this. You have a dirty ass that needs wiping but you can't get up or put your feet down. I don't know how but I managed to wipe my ass. I then stood up on the toliet seat. Flushed my toliet pull up my pants (still standing on the toliet) opened the door to the stall and jumped ovee the crap. One of the most awful moments of my life. I never felt so helpless in my life.

LOL awesome. Someone needs to start a thread dedicated to crapping stories. Maybe make it a sticky?

Paul121 · 02-01-2005, 09:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TRUEBLUE83

The longest five seconds of silence ensued before the boss asks, "Um... are you ok over there?"

You should have started crying and asked him for a hug.