The audacity! Decibel limits at the gym! (very, very serious)

KeepItSmoothBro · 06-15-2007, 11:51 AM

Whats up.

It was shaping up to be an awesome day. I brought my new workout partner, Jihad Muhammad, a newbie Arab fellow, to the gym with me. G.Pain and T.Money were already setting aside 20 45 lb plates to be used today. Today was deadlifting day.

I walk and see this ****ing disturbing sign. They installed decibel limit alarms. The audacity! No doubt, I was responsible for a lot of it as my screams and grunts once made a 90 year old woman deaf.

"What a bunch of BULL****" I screamed at the people at the desk. They're used to my abuse by now so they just shrugged it off.

We change in the locker rooms. Jihad Muhammad decided to wear full dress. Whatever. As long as he can lift, that is fine with me. So we start warming up with sets of 505 lbs. Jihad lagged behind at 100 lbs but whatever. I was happy to help.

The alarms went off so often that people started running up to the desk to complain about the noise we were making. I saw three of them up there at one time.

"GODDAMN PUSSIES!" I yelled, which happened to be so loud that the alarm went off...again. I'll remember them for later.

I saw some asswipe curling in the squat rack! It was Jihad's final set. I told Jihad "Make some ****ING NOISE. ITS 135 LB, DO THIS ****!!!"

Jihad started screaming "ALLLLLLLAAAAAAHHHHH AKKKKKKBAAAAAR" and then started running towards the squat rack! We look in confusion at the scene that unfolded in front of our very eyes. Jihad ran up to the curler and detonated a bomb! It took out nearly the whole northwest corner of the gym!

Fortunately, it took out the decibel alarm. My homies and I did out set of 655 lb deadlifts without the annoying buzzing. Lots of screaming, plates dropping on the ground, olympic bars being bent, it was a good day.