My Ben Affleck/Shakespearean gag at the gym.

[Ephemeron]

Ok..If you've ever seen Shakespeare In Love you may remember the poet's beard sported by our buddy, Ben Affleck. I've always wanted to emulate this fashionable look. Not only does he sport the tights and stockings..but he wears the classic "Shakespearean" hat. Today I had the idea of going to the gym dressed this way. I already had my "poet's beard", therefore all I needed was the clothing. Since it's no longer Elizabethan times and this isn't Mideval England, I went to this upscale costume shop downtown. I came out of the shop with my fabrics..spending a grand total of $275.49. Not too bad, considering that this shop supplies costumes for many collegiate productions.

I open up the rear door of my van, and change my clothing and down a protein shake. I'm careful not to flash anybody in the parking lot, covering my genitals with the traditional "Shakespearean" hat. I'm dressed, and ready for a workout and the gym!

I have 17 inch arms and a V taper you can't imagine, therefore I look stunning as I make my way to the front doors of the gym. People are giving me the strangest looks. One guy even asks "Where's the sword?" I kick open the front door of the gym and exclaim : "What is the play and what is my part?!!" I walk past the counter without checking in and this pisses the staff off. A young woman behind the counter says "You aren't in the proper attire." I slam my fist down on the counter, stand stiff with my nose in the air, and move into the wieght roomI walk right up to a man on the flat bench, and remove the bar from his hands..RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF HIS SET. By now, the security guard has spotted me and informs me to LEAVE IMMEDIATELY. People are upset and laughing at the same time, therefore I dart out the doors and into my van..pulling out of the parking lot laughing my ass off.

I realize that this was pretty immature of me, therefore I shaved off the poet's beard and changed into my normal workout attire. I put on a ballcap and went back to the gym to complete my Back and Bicep day. It was invigorating, nonetheless.

[Ephemeron]

Ahh yes.

[drakx188]

Originally posted by Ephemeron
spending a grand total of $275.49

u spent nearly $300 for 5 minutes of fun...
u better have returned that costume and got a full refund

[Ephemeron]

Originally posted by drakx188
u spent nearly $300 for 5 minutes of fun...
u better have returned that costume and got a full refund

I'm keeping the clothes. Love the clothes.

[drakx188]

lol ok then, thats cool...whatever tickles your pickle dude

[Mw6wW]

Originally posted by drakx188
lol ok then, thats cool...whatever tickles your pickle dude

ahahahahaa never heard that one

[rampride]

ok!!!
So this is the gym you will be going back to correct?

[Ephemeron]

Originally posted by rampride
ok!!!
So this is the gym you will be going back to correct?

Correct. I already did, they didn't recognize me. I might do it again someday.

[joshuabuilder]

Originally Posted by Ephemeron

Ok..If you've ever seen Shakespeare In Love you may remember the poet's beard sported by our buddy, Ben Affleck. I've always wanted to emulate this fashionable look. Not only does he sport the tights and stockings..but he wears the classic "Shakespearean" hat. Today I had the idea of going to the gym dressed this way. I already had my "poet's beard", therefore all I needed was the clothing. Since it's no longer Elizabethan times and this isn't Mideval England, I went to this upscale costume shop downtown. I came out of the shop with my fabrics..spending a grand total of $275.49. Not too bad, considering that this shop supplies costumes for many collegiate productions.

I open up the rear door of my van, and change my clothing and down a protein shake. I'm careful not to flash anybody in the parking lot, covering my genitals with the traditional "Shakespearean" hat. I'm dressed, and ready for a workout and the gym!

I have 17 inch arms and a V taper you can't imagine, therefore I look stunning as I make my way to the front doors of the gym. People are giving me the strangest looks. One guy even asks "Where's the sword?" I kick open the front door of the gym and exclaim : "What is the play and what is my part?!!" I walk past the counter without checking in and this pisses the staff off. A young woman behind the counter says "You aren't in the proper attire." I slam my fist down on the counter, stand stiff with my nose in the air, and move into the wieght roomI walk right up to a man on the flat bench, and remove the bar from his hands..RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF HIS SET. By now, the security guard has spotted me and informs me to LEAVE IMMEDIATELY. People are upset and laughing at the same time, therefore I dart out the doors and into my van..pulling out of the parking lot laughing my ass off.

I realize that this was pretty immature of me, therefore I shaved off the poet's beard and changed into my normal workout attire. I put on a ballcap and went back to the gym to complete my Back and Bicep day. It was invigorating, nonetheless.

How do you grow a poet's beard? I like that look.

[bigcalves]

why would u grab the bench press bar, when u completed ur back and biceps workout???
fake story, i demand rep points for pointing this out

[Ephemeron]

Originally Posted by bigcalves

why would u grab the bench press bar, when u completed ur back and biceps workout???
fake story, i demand rep points for pointing this out

Just because I grabbed the bar from this guy (A couple of months ago) doesn't mean I'm working chest. ????

[John Promise]

Originally Posted by bigcalves

why would u grab the bench press bar, when u completed ur back and biceps workout???
fake story, i demand rep points for pointing this out

If it's like my gym, there are no spares and he needed that bar for rows and curls.

[Ephemeron]

Originally Posted by John Promise

If it's like my gym, there are no spares and he needed that bar for rows and curls.

I took the bar just to be mischevious and cause a belly laugh among the patrons. Heh...I have 17" arms of FAT, and a not-so V taper.