New Gay Thread (part 2) - Page 220

Camel Baron · 02-21-2009, 06:52 AM

out of curiosity do any of u guise go to normal clubs you know the ones that arn't specifically for gay or lesbians? if so anyone here picked up a guy ? if so do u want to share ur story?

cochon · 02-21-2009, 07:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Camel Baron

out of curiosity do any of u guise go to normal clubs you know the ones that arn't specifically for gay or lesbians? if so anyone here picked up a guy ? if so do u want to share ur story?

Normal? Yesterday I went to an Irish pub if that can be called normal and even worse is the fact that I went with a normal guy friend of mine. I think TM is right, you need to leave that closet and get some experience.

wouldlikemuscle · 02-21-2009, 08:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Camel Baron

out of curiosity do any of u guise go to normal clubs you know the ones that arn't specifically for gay or lesbians? if so anyone here picked up a guy ? if so do u want to share ur story?

I've never pulled a guy at a "straight" club. One, coz it's way too hard to pick out any gay guys that might be there. Two, chances are, any gay guys there wouldn't be my type. Three, I could imagine the boozed up chavvy straights having summat to say if I did manage to find a guy to pull and end up having a punch up.

Quote:

Originally Posted by cochon

I think TM is right, you need to leave that closet and get some experience.

You both should come home from Narnia!

Mr. Nitro · 02-21-2009, 09:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MikeyLikesIt_81

are they the same price? do u cycle on and off of it?

they should be around the same price. not sure i forget.

MikeyLikesIt_81 · 02-21-2009, 11:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by alexander1983

i do use it, and i do like it. but i use one tub of it usually lasts a month or so, then go a few months without, then go on again. fruit punch is the best

thanks man...i was looking at blue raspberry, but i'll try the fruit punch instead!

Superion · 02-21-2009, 11:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Camel Baron

out of curiosity do any of u guise go to normal clubs you know the ones that arn't specifically for gay or lesbians? if so anyone here picked up a guy ? if so do u want to share ur story?

You should really consider coming out. You will feel so much better. A little step at a time. Perhaps come out on here first before rushing out RL. And if you are confuse i'm sure we can manage to give out some helpful infos.

No, its too hard to pick up who is straight or gay in a straight club. Straight clubs are generally filled with boring guys who just want to stand there and look cool or tough. I love going to straight clubs with the girls though.

Gay clubs are so much more FUN but can really get very cruisy at times.

bhujerban · 02-21-2009, 02:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Superion

You should really consider coming out. You will feel so much better. A little step at a time.

I know this wasn't intended for me, but I want to say something about it anyway. Though I'm definitely out here, beyond the cyberspace, I'm really not that much. I wouldn't define it as "closeted" - it's more like it was never a walk-in closet. Just not an issue in my family. If I came out today, they would shrug their shoulders and say "Yeah? So? And your point is...?"

Honestly, I don't see anything to gain from it. At least not from MY place. I'm not really secretive about it, either. We just don't talk about it. Is that not strange? And nothing will change - except maybe that I can go out more often and not have to explain why and where I'm going. (Scott doesn't go out for much of anything, so it's a special occasion when I do!)

Is this just a level of denial? Maybe, but why talk about it? Nothing to look at - what's to talk about? I'd still feel awkward about having a boyfriend or saying "I'm going out".

alexander1983 · 02-21-2009, 02:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MikeyLikesIt_81

thanks man...i was looking at blue raspberry, but i'll try the fruit punch instead!

fruit punch and lemonade are the good flavors. the rest taste like crap, but they do work. and you dont have to cycle it, but i like to. i like to regularly change things up

mntbikedude · 02-21-2009, 03:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bhujerberan

I know this wasn't intended for me, but I want to say something about it anyway. Though I'm definitely out here, beyond the cyberspace, I'm really not that much. I wouldn't define it as "closeted" - it's more like it was never a walk-in closet. Just not an issue in my family. If I came out today, they would shrug their shoulders and say "Yeah? So? And your point is...?"

Honestly, I don't see anything to gain from it. At least not from MY place. I'm not really secretive about it, either. We just don't talk about it. Is that not strange? And nothing will change - except maybe that I can go out more often and not have to explain why and where I'm going. (Scott doesn't go out for much of anything, so it's a special occasion when I do!)

Is this just a level of denial? Maybe, but why talk about it? Nothing to look at - what's to talk about? I'd still feel awkward about having a boyfriend or saying "I'm going out".

Yes it is big tine denial. If it's no big deal then it should be able to be discussed. My wifes uses the same bull****. After I came out it was ok as long as we didn't tell anyone. I ask her what about people we already think are gay, like her sister.

She said it's no ones business. Funny everyone elses sexuality is family business, we are all interested to know who's kids are dating who. Well unless their gay, that is ****ing bull****.

I allow part of it because I'm married with children who are still going to school. But if I were a young single guy I would never go the closeted route. I would get out and stay out and the family would just have to live with it.

cochon · 02-21-2009, 03:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mntbikedude

Yes it is big tine denial. If it's no big deal then it should be able to be discussed. My wifes uses the same bull****. After I came out it was ok as long as we didn't tell anyone. I ask her what about people we already think are gay, like her sister.

She said it's no ones business. Funny everyone elses sexuality is family business, we are all interested to know who's kids are dating who. Well unless their gay, that is ****ing bull****.

I allow part of it because I'm married with children who are still going to school. But if I were a young single guy I would never go the closeted route. I would get out and stay out and the family would just have to live with it.

Part of what you wife says is true, its nobody business unless you want to tell them. Some people are just a bunch of busybodies that only want to know things for the sake of having some cheap gossip to talk about because they don't have a life of their own.
On the other hand, if you tell them everything and they don't like it then tough, they should just live with it. Whether straight or gay unless you have a close relation with someone I don't see any reason why you should be telling who is going out with whom to family members.

atticus_a · 02-21-2009, 03:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Camel Baron

out of curiosity do any of u guise go to normal clubs you know the ones that arn't specifically for gay or lesbians? if so anyone here picked up a guy ? if so do u want to share ur story?

HAHA. Spot the gays--its like a bad Where's Waldo

For instance, if you go to a frat party and the guy is reasonably attractive, and he isn't trying to pick up a girl through out the night and is basicly alone at the end of the night. Odds are he is the closet guy. If you can hook up with him is one of those dicey things. Should you hook up with him is actually a better questions? Because I will bet he has some serious issues. If you do make small talk and mention that you are gay and ready to take off in passing towards him. If he is closeted and interested he will bite if not he will ignore you or attempt to get away from you. But after you say it you should be on your way to bounce out of there. I am not a big fan of hitting on guys or being cruise in 'straight areas' because at my heart I feel it is disrespectful.

At straight bar it is extremely bad form to attempt to pick up a straight guy. I believe in worse than at a frat party. Tacky even. I perceive you to be a guest in those instances. When they come to gay bars to play look at the homo's--it is okay to hit on them. But doing it in their bars is just lame and could land you into trouble. Usually they will hit on you if they are interested. If you are there with friends that know you are gay and cool. Generally word will get around that you are both gay and cool. If certain guys are interested they will find you. Also, if you know that you will keep your mouth shut they would be more likely to experiement with you.

I don't do these things because I have a out gays only clause for any real interaction. But I know some of my old friends have different views these are the tactics they use. That and alcohol...Lots of alcohol.

Also, don't hit on them at first either. If your gayness is mentioned in passing it is less likely to seen as a challenge. Hitting on them could piss them off. Also if they say something like, "I am cool with gays as long as they don't hit on me". Always respond with, "Don't worry, I like my man masculine." in a joking manner. You will find it makes magic happen if they don't get right and pissed off at you.

atticus_a · 02-21-2009, 03:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bhujerberan

I know this wasn't intended for me, but I want to say something about it anyway. Though I'm definitely out here, beyond the cyberspace, I'm really not that much. I wouldn't define it as "closeted" - it's more like it was never a walk-in closet. Just not an issue in my family. If I came out today, they would shrug their shoulders and say "Yeah? So? And your point is...?"

Honestly, I don't see anything to gain from it. At least not from MY place. I'm not really secretive about it, either. We just don't talk about it. Is that not strange? And nothing will change - except maybe that I can go out more often and not have to explain why and where I'm going. (Scott doesn't go out for much of anything, so it's a special occasion when I do!)

Is this just a level of denial? Maybe, but why talk about it? Nothing to look at - what's to talk about? I'd still feel awkward about having a boyfriend or saying "I'm going out".

I will bet that it is easier to have a relationship and keep a relationship when you are out. Most gay men will not want to sneak around unless it is a good reason.

Coming out through should be done if the benefits outway the costs. It depends on what you value and why. I think it isn't denial just you perceive there is more value in being closeted than out. I don't know if I would agree with that but I don't have to live with the consequences of your choices.

atticus_a · 02-21-2009, 04:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mntbikedude

Yes it is big tine denial. If it's no big deal then it should be able to be discussed. My wifes uses the same bull****. After I came out it was ok as long as we didn't tell anyone. I ask her what about people we already think are gay, like her sister.

She said it's no ones business. Funny everyone elses sexuality is family business, we are all interested to know who's kids are dating who. Well unless their gay, that is ****ing bull****.

I allow part of it because I'm married with children who are still going to school. But if I were a young single guy I would never go the closeted route. I would get out and stay out and the family would just have to live with it.

Since I am bored at work I am responding a lot today. HA. I agree in some regard if you want to stay close to your family. I think it is essential to tell them. If you are not close to your family, you don't have to tell them nothing. My brother and I are super close so I want to make sure that he can share in my life as I do with his. My grandparents are grade A hatemongers since I don't care about them and see no reason to allow them access to private information in my life that could be used to hurt me I would never tell them.

I think though I agree that the family needs to learn to live with it rather than you learn to hide. Being gay isn't a choice but choicing to discriminate and hating something is. So since theirs is a choice they have the ability to change.

bhujerban · 02-21-2009, 04:15 PM

Then what am I supposed to do? I don't see anything to gain either way, except that if I stay where I'm at, it'll be harder to do in the long run.

.................................................. ...................... guess I just answered my own question. Heh, how 'bout that. All right, I'll pick a date and commit to doing it then.

Through pain comes growth.

atticus_a · 02-21-2009, 04:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by trvlr70

Yesterday, I had my first appointment with an orthopedic surgeon concerning my broken collar bone since I saw the ER doc. I told him that wearing the sling was kinda painful and I have a pretty high tolerance to pain. He was curious about that so he made me take a few more x-rays while I was there. Well, it turned out, in addition to my broken clavicle, my left shoulder blade is also fractured as a result of the collision with the snowboarder. That would explain the pain of sling strap and sleeping on my back - which I was ordered to do. Now I have to sleep[are you sitting down for this?] in a upright lawn chair. THIS IS BULL****!

Woe is me.

Okay, I'm done feeling sorry for myself. I promise.

And I've already started hitting the gym again...if only very lightly. I just can't sit around and get soft. I'm doing weights on my right side and light cardio[non jarring] a bit, too.

Sorry kiddo. That is lame.

atticus_a · 02-21-2009, 04:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bhujerberan

Then what am I supposed to do? I don't see anything to gain either way, except that if I stay where I'm at, it'll be harder to do in the long run.

.................................................. ...................... guess I just answered my own question. Heh, how 'bout that. All right, I'll pick a date and commit to doing it then.

Through pain comes growth.

I am not going to lie. Not everyone has an easy time of it. Coming out can be a big pain in the ass. Especially with the people you knew since you were a kid. Be ready from some ridiculous questions.

thickmass · 02-21-2009, 04:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Camel Baron

out of curiosity do any of u guise go to normal clubs you know the ones that arn't specifically for gay or lesbians? if so anyone here picked up a guy ? if so do u want to share ur story?

Are you hoping that you can hide in the comfort of a straight club figuring a few fellow homos will attend who u can pick up (once we've all given you tips)?

Camel Baron · 02-21-2009, 05:10 PM

nope just very curious but no gay. see you guys have good etiqute e.g not attempting to pick up at straight clubs very interesting. i thought it was a free for all

thickmass · 02-21-2009, 05:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Camel Baron

nope just very curious but no gay. see you guys have good etiqute e.g not attempting to pick up at straight clubs very interesting. i thought it was a free for all

Nope

In fact theres ettykett at gay clubs too. Not that much picker-uppering goes on really, people go with their friends to relax, not to speed date

garza_20 · 02-21-2009, 05:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by thickmass

Nope

In fact theres ettykett at gay clubs too. Not that much picker-uppering goes on really, people go with their friends to relax, not to speed date

yup... very true... at gay clubs... we tend to stick together... only time i start talking to someone.. is well someone comes up and talks to you, your friends introduce you to someone else.... and well my favorite... after you've had about 5 tequila shots to get the courage to go up to someone

mntbikedude · 02-21-2009, 05:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bhujerberan

Then what am I supposed to do? I don't see anything to gain either way, except that if I stay where I'm at, it'll be harder to do in the long run.

.................................................. ...................... guess I just answered my own question. Heh, how 'bout that. All right, I'll pick a date and commit to doing it then.

Through pain comes growth.

I would get a sexual identity therapist to help you. You really do need a support team in place. I didn't mean to come across so harsh. I'm just frustrated that society has made it so hard.

Camel Baron · 02-21-2009, 05:32 PM

how did you guys find out for the first time that you guys where gay? isn't it difficult growing up in a society where guy loves girl and girl loves guy.

Was there some confusion in your early years of youth? where you scared or feel any emotions when you realized?

The first time I found out I was straight was when I was in year 1 or 2 and started to like this girl, we use to be close and always go to the monkey bars together, it was special and i did not understand what was going on until i was older where i realized that i had feelings for her...

garza_20 · 02-21-2009, 05:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Camel Baron

how did you guys find out for the first time that you guys where gay? isn't it difficult growing up in a society where guy loves girl and girl loves guy.

Was there some confusion in your early years of youth? where you scared or feel any emotions when you realized?

The first time I found out I was straight was when I was in year 1 or 2 and started to like this girl, we use to be close and always go to the monkey bars together, it was special and i did not understand what was going on until i was older where i realized that i had feelings for her...

dude.. i had a crush on my ex fiance since i was 4... but when i was able to actually kiss a guy... thats how i knew. I had seen men make out and thought it was the most disgusting thing in the world... but then i met this guy and he was pretty... not cute... but actually pretty... and we talked... one nite after work i just had to kiss him... and thats when i knew. Its funny... i could get bj's from guys and not think anything of it.. still say i was str8.. but the moment i was able to kiss a guy i just knew. 3 months later i called my engagement off.

Camel Baron · 02-21-2009, 06:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by garza_20

dude.. i had a crush on my ex fiance since i was 4... but when i was able to actually kiss a guy... thats how i knew. I had seen men make out and thought it was the most disgusting thing in the world... but then i met this guy and he was pretty... not cute... but actually pretty... and we talked... one nite after work i just had to kiss him... and thats when i knew. Its funny... i could get bj's from guys and not think anything of it.. still say i was str8.. but the moment i was able to kiss a guy i just knew. 3 months later i called my engagement off.

Damnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn son

garza_20 · 02-21-2009, 06:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Camel Baron

Damnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn son

eh... its life.. you live, you learn, you experiment.. its all about living.

Camel Baron · 02-21-2009, 06:13 PM

when you called it off did you tell her exactly why or did you keep it away from her? what was her reaction when she found out.

but damn brah

cochon · 02-21-2009, 07:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by thickmass

Nope

In fact theres ettykett at gay clubs too. Not that much picker-uppering goes on really, people go with their friends to relax, not to speed date

Etiquette?? Nobody told me, so what happens now with all those years I did break it. Do they send me the gey police now? If questioned about it I will be taking lots of other people down with me for exactly the same crime.

lvhairymen · 02-21-2009, 07:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Camel Baron

out of curiosity do any of u guise go to normal clubs you know the ones that arn't specifically for gay or lesbians? if so anyone here picked up a guy ? if so do u want to share ur story?

I met my partner in a straight bar. It's just a local bar/grill, and we were sitting right next to each other. I had no clue he was gay, but I knew he was a great guy! Luckily he was both!

Camel Baron · 02-21-2009, 07:36 PM

well what do you guys think of kids? for instance when you decided to call of the wedding garza did you think about the fact that doing this could possibly mean you will never be a biological father to a child?

cochon · 02-21-2009, 07:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Camel Baron

well what do you guys think of kids? for instance when you decided to call of the wedding garza did you think about the fact that doing this could possibly mean you will never be a biological father to a child?

Er... since when being gay stops you from being able to have kids?