In shape,single and frustrated!

[TheBlasterMan]

Originally Posted by ginarochelle

Ok, so i have been single for over four months now and to many this may not seem to be a big deal. But i have always been the relationship type and find myself happiest when i have that special someone around to share things with....including intamacy. So you can see where this is going. I'm thinking to myself that i have been working so hard in the gym to get into this physical condition and yet there is no one to appreciate it but myself. I just find it ironic and frustrating that when i had all of these insecurities I was in a relationship and now that i'm confident and ready to share the best me...where are all the good, hot, available men!? Grrrr! Is it the new confidence? Does it scare off the men? Is anyone else having this trouble!?!?!

go to the gym for YOURSELF not others. Focusing your efforts for the amusement of other people is setting yourself up for failure.

Having good looks its just a "side effect" of our hobby. People do appreciate your work. I guarantee when you go out, eyes come your way.

Your gorgeous, id be all over you if you were local

[STANDUP!]

patience will pay off. i've almost always rushed into relatioship and ended up empty handed or hurt. be patient

[OutOfStep]

Originally Posted by ginarochelle

Maybe i am! I thought that by making my appearance better, it would attract the opposite sex....but i guess that isn't the case.

Move to Rhode Island.

[23Chills]

It always seems that when your taken, everybody wants you. When your single nobody is looking....

I just don't put too much thought into it, last time I rushed into something it ended badly.

23.

[JustinSane110]

Ok seriously, are there more girls like this out there? Good looking, single, that are actually wanting a boyfriend? Honestly a lot of what's been said in here is true, we look at a very attractive girl in the gym and immediately assume "There's no way she's single..." and generally convince ourselves not to strike up a conversation, and on top of that there's lots of girls that have that "Don't talk to me, I'm here to work out" attitude so that could also be a part of it. Oh another thing is that since its the gym, it kinda would cause an awkward situation for a guy to get rejected and then see you there regularly since you two would most likely workout at the same time of day due to schedules.

Believe it or not, guys are capable of overanalyzing as well.

[Geno]

They are at corporate events, charity events (real charity events like auctions and art shows - not feeding bums or passing blankets out to losers) and at the most inoportune times.

If you're really hurting - try an online site. I hear you can get 6 months free if you don't like the first 6432165461654 guys.

[martina92685]

I'm glad you are still single and okay with it, OP.

I have too many friends who rush into relationships...and 2 of my closest friend are either pregnant or have a child with a deadbeat. It's not worth it.

Be yourself, as lovely and confident that you are, and know that you are a treat for them!

[Jmh80]

Interesting thread.
I think this goes for both sexes though.

Anyway - I would have phrased some of it slightly differently, I think. I don't think it's that the OP never gets approached, I think it's the approaching is more subtle because guys are more intimidated.

A woman always has options, just wait for a guy to say hi. Perhaps she's not picking up on it or it's not the personality type she's looking for that have approached.


As far as the 4 month thing (now 8 months if still single), I think the OP needed a break - was starting to attach a sense of herself to being in a relationship. She needed to take a step back and just live life for herself.

Good luck OP. Be happy and have fun.

[ellematkovic]

Originally Posted by ginarochelle

Ok, so i have been single for over four months now and to many this may not seem to be a big deal. But i have always been the relationship type and find myself happiest when i have that special someone around to share things with....including intamacy. So you can see where this is going. I'm thinking to myself that i have been working so hard in the gym to get into this physical condition and yet there is no one to appreciate it but myself. I just find it ironic and frustrating that when i had all of these insecurities I was in a relationship and now that i'm confident and ready to share the best me...where are all the good, hot, available men!? Grrrr! Is it the new confidence? Does it scare off the men? Is anyone else having this trouble!?!?!

hhaha omg I actually know exactly how you feel, its pretty annoying not having a chance to show off yoru figure for the right guy, plus i live way up north too so now that im in shape, all im wearing are winter coats haha

[gymjunkie89]

Originally Posted by ginarochelle

Ok, so i have been single for over four months now and to many this may not seem to be a big deal. But i have always been the relationship type and find myself happiest when i have that special someone around to share things with....including intamacy. So you can see where this is going. I'm thinking to myself that i have been working so hard in the gym to get into this physical condition and yet there is no one to appreciate it but myself. I just find it ironic and frustrating that when i had all of these insecurities I was in a relationship and now that i'm confident and ready to share the best me...where are all the good, hot, available men!? Grrrr! Is it the new confidence? Does it scare off the men? Is anyone else having this trouble!?!?!

I know exactly what you mean..and I have actually been told by a couple of guys that I am intimidating in the gym because I always look confident in what I'm doing - so then I think, well, do I need to become one of those girls talking on their phone whilst on the leg abductor machine pushing 5kg so that guys aren't scared off?

If you want to talk to me, come and talk - I don't bite! It's just good being able to chat to someone with an interest in the gym and fitness, because there are so few girls (particularly around the 18-20 age bracket) that actually take it seriously.

[kevinus99]

Originally Posted by ToraAdams

Being in shape and beautiful is about your dedication to yourself. Your great attitude and respect is what you give to others. I think your winning personality will always get you further in your goals to meet the right guy than whether or not you have a few pounds to lose or muscles to gain.

Problem is people see your body before they see your personality. it works the same way for guys; right off the bat everyone assumes you have a GF/wife, if not then you must be humping everything that has 2 legs, you are gay or you are in love with yourself.... did i miss anything; think i got it all

[bigdave22006]

Originally Posted by ginarochelle

Ok, so i have been single for over four months now and to many this may not seem to be a big deal. But i have always been the relationship type and find myself happiest when i have that special someone around to share things with....including intamacy. So you can see where this is going. I'm thinking to myself that i have been working so hard in the gym to get into this physical condition and yet there is no one to appreciate it but myself. I just find it ironic and frustrating that when i had all of these insecurities I was in a relationship and now that i'm confident and ready to share the best me...where are all the good, hot, available men!? Grrrr! Is it the new confidence? Does it scare off the men? Is anyone else having this trouble!?!?!

alot of men are intimidated by an attractive woman and that could be part of your problem I suggest if you see a guy you like talk to him and be sweet alot of younger girls that are in shape are pretty rude maybe it will help

[deawalsh]

Originally Posted by ginarochelle

Ok, so i have been single for over four months now and to many this may not seem to be a big deal. But i have always been the relationship type and find myself happiest when i have that special someone around to share things with....including intamacy. So you can see where this is going. I'm thinking to myself that i have been working so hard in the gym to get into this physical condition and yet there is no one to appreciate it but myself. I just find it ironic and frustrating that when i had all of these insecurities I was in a relationship and now that i'm confident and ready to share the best me...where are all the good, hot, available men!? Grrrr! Is it the new confidence? Does it scare off the men? Is anyone else having this trouble!?!?!

Welcome in the club!!! same situation here!!

[martina92685]

Originally Posted by deawalsh

Welcome in the club!!! same situation here!!

You are 17! Enjoy being that age!! You DO NOT need a boyfriend at 17.

[TheBlasterMan]

Originally Posted by martina92685

You are 17! Enjoy being that age!! You DO NOT need a boyfriend at 17.

I can be her boyfriend

[libragrl1685]

ok so I'm definitely not at my ideal size or anything but I've lost about 60 lbs...I've gained confidence (not that I'm conceited or anything) but I haven't had any decent guys that are into me......when I was heavy the only thing I saw around me were happy couples with thin girlfriends...after my last relationship I got so hurt that I decided to make a change so guys couldn't have any excuse anymore and that I wouldn't allow myself to be so insecure in a relationship ....I know I have more work to do to get to where I want to be but it feels the more I physically and mentally better myself the more they want to run in the other direction...my ex even went for the thin dance instructor type and she's psychotic and possessive (even to the extent of calling me up more than 6 months after we broke up to find out when my last conversation was with him )....and he's back with her...
it completely boggles my mind what guys are looking for because it seems as though they want the thin/in shape girls yet when you lose the weight they're MIA or treating you like crap too....yet the girls I know that are still thin are still in relationships... ??? anyone wanna take a stab at this post lol
sorry I vented but this thread has been exactly what I've been thinking for I dont know how long now...

[MMAFANATIC28]

Originally Posted by ginarochelle

Ok, so i have been single for over four months now and to many this may not seem to be a big deal. But i have always been the relationship type and find myself happiest when i have that special someone around to share things with....including intamacy. So you can see where this is going. I'm thinking to myself that i have been working so hard in the gym to get into this physical condition and yet there is no one to appreciate it but myself. I just find it ironic and frustrating that when i had all of these insecurities I was in a relationship and now that i'm confident and ready to share the best me...where are all the good, hot, available men!? Grrrr! Is it the new confidence? Does it scare off the men? Is anyone else having this trouble!?!?!

well look at it like this the longer you wait the better its gonna be! I was like that when I traveled alot but now that im in one spot it just seems easier

[1200custom]

How could a girl like you not have guys interested?? I'm sure you have plently of options when it comes to guys. Your an attractive person. I think your looking for a perfect guy. Lower your standards

[April_Venture]

I feel the same sometimes. I go out to have fun and it seems like it is a rare thing for me to be the one in the groupl to get hit on while the other girls that are always fussing about their weight and the blems are getting hit left and right. I was told that it is the intimidation thing mixed with the lesson learned on the animal planet. The predators go for what they see as a obtainable kill. The easiest target while still getting something they can be happy with. Start dating girls also. It opens the odds for ya and will make me happier if I am ever in your neck of the woods. lol.

April Venture