Great job to everyone in this thread!
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Great job to everyone in this thread!
Day 1 checking in.
For about the last 8 months I've been drinking heavily on average 4 times a week, while at the same time totally neglecting the gym and losing all my strength and muscle and replacing that with fat. Went from about 10lbs away from the 1000lb club to probably around 800.
I'm not even 22 yet, this is not the way I want to live the rest of my life.
Im a little over 6 months sober.
Im a real alcoholic and I needed to stop. I went to court for a drug charge, and shouldve gotten 7 to 10.
Thank God I got deferred judication, and my charges reduced.
Exercising is my favorite hobby now, and my life is A LOT better now.
Congrats to everyone else.
You can do it brah
20 days clean today.....stay strong guys
married and not drinking.....lol good luck (srs)
I haven't been here for a while but something I was reading made me remember this thread and since Aug 15th was my 3 yr sober mark, I thought I'd update for those of you wondering what the hell happened to me. Or, if nobody cares, consider this a free bump, :D
All is good... Not a drink to be had. I graduated school back in May, finally, and now I'm studying for my CPA. Doing the Becker review and classes start Oct. 9th. Should get real interesting for a while. I haven't been to the gym in a year. No excuse for that one I guess but I'm not turning into a fat ass either so I guess thats ok. I'll wait until I turn into a fat ass and I'll go again.
Overall there have been ups and downs, such as life, but there's no longer fear of the unknown. Just clear headedness that I wouldn't trade for the world. Hopefully there have been a few people that my ramblings have helped in this thread. It was a great tool for me to use, so much so that posting here is probably why I didn't rely so heavily on AA. For that I thank you.
Take care! I'll be back to update this on my 4 yr. Hopefully somebody will gain something from it if I bump it up every year, :D
[QUOTE=MogadishuK;932670493]Phuu..I was just browsing the thread and this definitely resonated with me. I recently had a relationship with this girl for a few months and towards the end, when I was really drunk, my father would come out, angry, shouting, nasty etc. It was ****ed up. I also never want to be like my father but I think deep inside I do carry some of his impulses and anger that he carried on to me and usually when I am sober I am known as a calm, nice guy but I realised recently that drinking can bring out that bad side to me so it definitely made me think twice. Subjecting that ugly to side to a girlfriend or anyone would really damage the relationship so it doesn make you think twice.[/QUOTE]
Agreed. ;)
[QUOTE=TNetz;943721873]I haven't been here for a while but something I was reading made me remember this thread and since Aug 15th was my 3 yr sober mark, I thought I'd update for those of you wondering what the hell happened to me. Or, if nobody cares, consider this a free bump, :D
All is good... Not a drink to be had. I graduated school back in May, finally, and now I'm studying for my CPA. Doing the Becker review and classes start Oct. 9th. Should get real interesting for a while. I haven't been to the gym in a year. No excuse for that one I guess but I'm not turning into a fat ass either so I guess thats ok. I'll wait until I turn into a fat ass and I'll go again.
Overall there have been ups and downs, such as life, but there's no longer fear of the unknown. Just clear headedness that I wouldn't trade for the world. Hopefully there have been a few people that my ramblings have helped in this thread. It was a great tool for me to use, so much so that posting here is probably why I didn't rely so heavily on AA. For that I thank you.
Take care! I'll be back to update this on my 4 yr. Hopefully somebody will gain something from it if I bump it up every year, :D[/QUOTE]
Congrads. Good luck on four.
[QUOTE=TNetz;943721873]I haven't been here for a while but something I was reading made me remember this thread and since Aug 15th was my 3 yr sober mark, I thought I'd update for those of you wondering what the hell happened to me. Or, if nobody cares, consider this a free bump, :D
All is good... Not a drink to be had. I graduated school back in May, finally, and now I'm studying for my CPA. Doing the Becker review and classes start Oct. 9th. Should get real interesting for a while. I haven't been to the gym in a year. No excuse for that one I guess but I'm not turning into a fat ass either so I guess thats ok. I'll wait until I turn into a fat ass and I'll go again.
Overall there have been ups and downs, such as life, but there's no longer fear of the unknown. Just clear headedness that I wouldn't trade for the world. Hopefully there have been a few people that my ramblings have helped in this thread. It was a great tool for me to use, so much so that posting here is probably why I didn't rely so heavily on AA. For that I thank you.
Take care! I'll be back to update this on my 4 yr. Hopefully somebody will gain something from it if I bump it up every year, :D[/QUOTE]
Congrats TNetz. Tomorrow (the 6th) marks my 3 year as well. The thread has been one of the biggest helps for me and I am still very grateful for it. If nothing else, know that it helped at least me.
Glad things are going well. I see you moved to Zambia. lol. Hope the weathers nice...
[QUOTE=JMath;943914133]Congrats TNetz. Tomorrow (the 6th) marks my 3 year as well. The thread has been one of the biggest helps for me and I am still very grateful for it. If nothing else, know that it helped at least me.
Glad things are going well. I see you moved to Zambia. lol. Hope the weathers nice...[/QUOTE]
LOL! I seriously laughed my ass off. Wasn't sure if anyone would catch that. I was getting into too many arguments on the boards. Didn't want anyone to come lookin for me. j/k
On a serious note, thanks and congrats man. Since the beginning of this thread its always been JMath and the "thread". One and the same. I didn't think it was necessary to mention you again. ;)
I think if you believe that you can change then what stopping you?
Coming to the point now,where drinking has stopped being fun.And could become a problem.
Can no longer handle the hangovers.They last a couple of days now.Quite often they bring severe depression.
As I type this I'm suffering from a big night out....... Can't do it anymore.
Just recently split up with my g/f......Alcohol make's thing 1000 times worse.
I'm on the wagon.
Repped... good**** brotha. Im in the same exact boat as you, same reasons. I just started too. I went a year and a half awhile back completely cold turkey. This time im stickin with it. Hope ur still goin strong
I'm impressed man! my mother quit drinking about 9 mouth ago !
good job !
Great thread. Appt wednesday, going to request Campral to reduce cravings. Some people claim it's a miracle drug, others say it doesn't work for them... I'll see. I went 4 days but the cravings were insane, couldn't think straight.
Therapist told me I need an accountability partner. I convinved him I was better and am back to drinking GRRRR. I don't want to go back to therapist. Anyonne know how accountability partner works?
[QUOTE=tandpr;981004353]Therapist told me I need an accountability partner. I convinved him I was better and am back to drinking GRRRR. I don't want to go back to therapist. Anyonne know how accountability partner works?[/QUOTE]
Actually, I joined this thread a couple weeks or so after it was created and kind of utilized the OP as my accountability partner. Even though I have never met him, don't know him personally, and owed him nothing, I still kind of felt a sense of responsibility and accountability towards him and this thread. I knew I'd feel bad if I came into the thread and failed at my goal and this had to admit that I drank.
Basically it can work on a couple ways, but the basic premis is that you tell someone about your commitment to not drinking. That commitment gives you an extra sense of accountability when it comes to not drinking, because you're no longer letting just yourself down. It can be a spouse, sibling, parent, another drinker who wants to quit...
[QUOTE=JMath;981068033]Actually, I joined this thread a couple weeks or so after it was created and kind of utilized the OP as my accountability partner. Even though I have never met him, don't know him personally, and owed him nothing, I still kind of felt a sense of responsibility and accountability towards him and this thread. I knew I'd feel bad if I came into the thread and failed at my goal and this had to admit that I drank.
Basically it can work on a couple ways, but the basic premis is that you tell someone about your commitment to not drinking. That commitment gives you an extra sense of accountability when it comes to not drinking, because you're no longer letting just yourself down. It can be a spouse, sibling, parent, another drinker who wants to quit...[/QUOTE]
I have kinda tried that but everyone I know drinks and has no intention of stopping or they are like me, vow to quit after an incident and then ease back into drinking once the guilt wears off. Thanks for the reply. I am trying again, but I have failed so many times and they say doing the same thing and expecting different results is the defiinition of insanity.....so by all odds I am destined to fail again.
just do it every day
on day 46 of no alcohol. seem to have replaced it with food though, just another thing to tackle now instead of drinking!
[QUOTE=tandpr;981458943]I have kinda tried that but everyone I know drinks and has no intention of stopping or they are like me, vow to quit after an incident and then ease back into drinking once the guilt wears off. Thanks for the reply. I am trying again, but I have failed so many times and they say doing the same thing and expecting different results is the defiinition of insanity.....so by all odds I am destined to fail again.[/QUOTE]
It takes most people many attempts before they're successful, usually. Don't have a defeated attitude and keep trying. It's all you can do. Eventually you'll succeed and you'll wonder why you didn't do it sooner. It's just like any other addiction or bad habit, they're very tough to quit, and very easy to fall back into. Eventually though your desire to succeed at this will be greater than your desire for a drink. Just don't quit trying to quit.
[QUOTE=Tounx;981598213]just do it every day[/QUOTE]
[QUOTE=JMath;981634033]It takes most people many attempts before they're successful, usually. Don't have a defeated attitude and keep trying. It's all you can do. Eventually you'll succeed and you'll wonder why you didn't do it sooner. It's just like any other addiction or bad habit, they're very tough to quit, and very easy to fall back into. Eventually though your desire to succeed at this will be greater than your desire for a drink. Just don't quit trying to quit.[/QUOTE]
Thanks for the encouragement. Alot of me really wants to quit but there is still that part of me inside waiting for weekend so I can go to the bar and see my "friends". Does that mean I don't want to quit or is that normal and I just have to fight that part of me that loves the "life"
[QUOTE=tandpr;981975673]Thanks for the encouragement. Alot of me really wants to quit but there is still that part of me inside waiting for weekend so I can go to the bar and see my "friends". Does that mean I don't want to quit or is that normal and I just have to fight that part of me that loves the "life"[/QUOTE]
It's normal to associate drinking with, well, everything. Had a great day. Drink. Had a bad day. Drink. Steak on the grill. Drink. Hanging with my friends. Drink. Birthday. Drink. Weekend. Drink. Etc., etc. If you go into it (quitting) thinking that you'll fail, the relapse has already happened. Many in recovery believe that a relapse occurs the moment you drink, they would be wrong. A relapse occurs the moment you begin to devise a plan to drink. An addict's brain is simply wired that way. It makes no sense; but, it does to us. We want to be a better person, we want to change, we want our life to be back in order--and the odds are against us--1 in 5 succeed in staying sober beyond 30 days; but, those odds increase every single day that we stay sober.
We all get it. It's a brain issue. I can be sitting next to someone at a football game and they'll suckle a beer the entire time. Drives me nuts. I'm thinking, "Just drink the fukking thing!" The one thing we have on our side, is support. Family. Friends. Coworkers. If you're honest with yourself and honest with them, they'll hold you accountable for every action--annoyingly so. And that is a GREAT thing. If your friends don't understand, educate them. If they don't want to support you, they're only aiding you in your own demise. Time to dismiss them. Sucks, but it's saving your life. The life that you love.
All of that sounds like you are talking exactly about me. And I know I have probably heard it all before (spent some time in AA) but maybe repitition will cause it to sink in :) Thanks for the reply.
[QUOTE=tandpr;982049963]All of that sounds like you are talking exactly about me. And I know I have probably heard it all before (spent some time in AA) but maybe repitition will cause it to sink in :) Thanks for the reply.[/QUOTE]
To be clear, I'm not advocating any 12 step program. If it works for you, awesome. For me (and this is ME), I found no refuge in AA/NA/CR, etc. I found refuge in family and their support. They've watched me become a millionaire to rags--and have been there every step of the way. Many of us in this condition simply become bored. I've been to psychologists, psychiatrists, MDs, DO's, rehab and on and on. The mind wants what it wants. It's our responsibility to RECOVER. I can place no less blame on the diabetic that craves a piece of chocolate cake; however, I can choose whether or not to leave an operating room table with my chest split open (our minds think this way).
Doctors can tell us we'll DIE if we continue on our path, we'll still find a way to drink or use. This is one of the only "steps" I personally agree upon, "We're powerless..." Powerless is a powerful word. It has nothing but negative connotations; however, we can use this to our advantage (heh, addict using to gain advantages), but it WORKS. Once you utter that word, you're committed.
You can't take it back. No matter how many apologies and sorries you spit. You can't take back that word. You're powerless over whatever sh/it that got you where you're at. It's humbling. It's that warm feeling in your belly that [insert here drug of choice] filled. Once that cloud is liberated, you'll feel at peace.
AA/NA/Rehab likes to teach about the "fleeting" 'pink cloud.' And I agree, to a certain extent. But, that "cloud" doesn't define you. YOU define YOU. If going to 5 AA meetings a day keeps you clean, okay. No judgement here. If finding YOU, establishing a support system, becoming YOU without drugs or alcohol is what you ultimately want to achieve, make yourself whole. The trusted individual you are. No need to find the "old you", the old you got you to this point. Establish the new YOU.
Thoughts on antabuse...... legitimate tool or lazy persons crutch?
[QUOTE=tandpr;982124743]Thoughts on antabuse...... legitimate tool or lazy persons crutch?[/QUOTE]
Whatever helps you. The important part of this entire process is to fix YOU. The hardest thing to let go of, control.
Antabuse can certainly be effective in deterring you from using alcohol (and anything with alcohol in it, like cologne). But, it still doesn't put your mind in a place that says, "Hey! I'm done drinking now! A little help over here!" That's where your support group comes in. We didn't develop this disease overnight--some would argue that it's been there, dormant, all along. Whatever you choose, know there is no "magic pill." Using is innate in our brains and we'll find any way to soften the emptiness that mood altering chemicals fill. Healing begins from the inside--and there may be no problems at all--focusing on you, getting healthy, is still the ultimate goal.
In reference to all that you have said:
You seeem to deal more directly (and possibly affectively) with the issue at hand than any AA or therapist I have seen. I am guessing you speak from experience rather than schooling. Thanks for your time
I was sober over 9 years, not a drop that whole time. Then for some silly reason I decided to try drinking again (I'm an adult, right?)
Let me tell you guys, it's everything they say it is. You wind up exactly where you left off and it ain't pretty. I almost had 10 years and I messed it all up, but more importantly I made an ass out of myself. It's shameful and very humiliating but it's all part of being a recovering alcoholic I guess.
Tomorrow I will be 1 week sober, again. Wish me luck this time, I freakin need it.