Learning to be happy with myself - Day 1

[bubblepop]

This Journal is my decision to be honest with myself in more than one way. I have, and to some extent still do, struggle with disordered eating. I have never taken it to extremes but if I’m truthful my preoccupation with weight and body image governs, a large part of my life (To a greater or lesser extent depending on what I'm going through). At the moment I am in the midst of revising for my University finals; a period which I foresee being quite stressful and triggering. I therefore want to take control of myself, to build and maintain a fit and healthy physique and not to succumb to my more destructive behaviours. I hope that this Journal will aid me in achieving these goals.

These are my stats as of today:

Height: 5' 7
Weight: 123 lb and small framed
I don’t know my Body Fat%, if anyone could tell me how I find out that would be great.

At the moment I mainly do cardio, around 1hr a day - usually burning around 500 cals - although I am looking to incorporate some light weights - again any advice would be appreciated.

In terms of diet I am aiming for roughly 1500 cals a day. I would like to loose a few pounds for the summer but most importantly I want to increase my fitness and stay healthy for my exams

[MsJewels]

You sound like a healthy weight for your height.

First, welcome to the fabulous life of journaling! :) It's SO helpful - You will find great support on this forum, and can learn a lot.

Now most importantly, tell us WHEN you're eating and WHAT you eat each time. How do you track your cals? I use http://www.fitday.com - It's such a great site - And it's free! I would suggest signing up for a free membership.

Cardio burns fat and muscle, so if you want to build muscle in order to build a more defined body, you'll have to add weight training. You won't get huge - It takes a lot of dedication for women to gain bulky muscle, so don't be afraid to lift hard.

In terms of food, eat often - 5-6 times a day, an depending upon your goals, eat about 250-350 cals per meal. Ensure you eat before and after your workouts, and eat protein and some carbs with each meal. This will keep you sastified longer, and the protein is very important because this is your body's fuel for building muscle.

Good foods to include daily: egg whites, yams, brown rice, chicken breasts (no skin), spinach, broccoli, carrots, nofat cottage cheese, whey protein powders, oatmeal, ...

Hope this is a start! I don't want to over-babbled with info until I read more details about your current diet and activity.

But I do want you to know that over-coming your eating disorder is within your power. When I joined bb.com, I was having issues with binge eating in the evenings, and felt awful about it. I have since overcome this (and I joined in February 2005!) by learning what was wrong in my diet, and by actually eating MORE! I wasn't eating enough cals, so I was starving by the time I got home. I'm 5'5 and about 110 lbs, and eat over 2000 cals a day.

[bubblepop]

Thank you for all the advice I will definitely check out fitday and will post some more info tomorrow. Right now I am off to bed. Revision begins at 8 am!
Thanks again, your success is an inspiration.

[Lovemuscle999]

Good luck bubblepop. I have just started a journal to try and keep me in line as well (but for different reasons). Will keep an eye on ur progress. I am nearing the end of my degree as well so can sympathise with ur stress :( Ironically the best thing u can do is train imo. Sorts me right out! For some light weights u could try bench press, lat pull down, squat or leg press, shoulder press, bicep barbell curl and some sit ups. Just take it easy at first. Around 10-15 reps, one or two sets of each for a few weeks and go from there. Oh, and do it on your days off cardio. Hope this helps.

[taifighter]

You sound like a healthy weight for your height.

First, welcome to the fabulous life of journaling! :) It's SO helpful - You will find great support on this forum, and can learn a lot.

Now most importantly, tell us WHEN you're eating and WHAT you eat each time. How do you track your cals? I use http://www.fitday.com - It's such a great site - And it's free! I would suggest signing up for a free membership.

Cardio burns fat and muscle, so if you want to build muscle in order to build a more defined body, you'll have to add weight training. You won't get huge - It takes a lot of dedication for women to gain bulky muscle, so don't be afraid to lift hard.

In terms of food, eat often - 5-6 times a day, an depending upon your goals, eat about 250-350 cals per meal. Ensure you eat before and after your workouts, and eat protein and some carbs with each meal. This will keep you sastified longer, and the protein is very important because this is your body's fuel for building muscle.

Good foods to include daily: egg whites, yams, brown rice, chicken breasts (no skin), spinach, broccoli, carrots, nofat cottage cheese, whey protein powders, oatmeal, ...

Hope this is a start! I don't want to over-babbled with info until I read more details about your current diet and activity.

But I do want you to know that over-coming your eating disorder is within your power. When I joined bb.com, I was having issues with binge eating in the evenings, and felt awful about it. I have since overcome this (and I joined in February 2005!) by learning what was wrong in my diet, and by actually eating MORE! I wasn't eating enough cals, so I was starving by the time I got home. I'm 5'5 and about 110 lbs, and eat over 2000 cals a day.


Tried to give you a rep for this post, but I've already given you too many ;)
AWESOME post, great info and very very inspiring!!! :D

PS. Welcome to the board bubblepop!! you are in GREAT company here!! lots and lots of us ladies getting over our own disordered eating and becoming strong mentally and physically in the process!

[weener]

You go bubbletwonk, I know you can do it!!!
Mike xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[sillyvent]

Hey girl. Welcome....you are 123lbs and 5'7"....Okay I am 5' and was 120lbs at 17% bf.....so I am having a hard time with your weight....I mean in terms of thinking you need to lose more, I don't. Could you possibly post pictures so we can see where you are at.
On a very personal level let me start by saying my sister was/is suffering with an eating disorder - aneroxia. I say was/is because even though she is now exercising and eating properly she still has this terrible body image of herself....ed's don't just disappear they take time and effort to rid of. After my sister saw me transform my body for a figure show- seeing me with abs and a small waist she stopped not eating and started getting to the gym and eating 6/7 small meals a day like I do. She started this not eating when I left for college(which killed me b/c I wasn't there and worrying about her everyday was so HARD b/c I blamed myself) and she was so bad at one point we almost had to put her in the hospital. She wouldn't admit she had a problem until about 8 months ago when she realized what she was actually doing to herself. I enjoy helping her with diet ideas and lifting techniques and when I read your journal it really inspired me to try and help you the best I can......
Having said all that....a genertic way of attempting to lose fat is taking your body weight times 14 and thats the caloires you want to be around. Using that method you would need at least 1722 cals. I'm not so sure you need to lose weight- maybe adding a little bit of muscle to make you tighter would be good for you- again I am just guessing at this point. 1 hour of cardio a day is extreme- ween your self lower. You NEED at least 1 rest day- try and spilt like this:

monday- 30 mins cardio
tues- legs
weds-30 mins cardio
thurs- chest, tris, bis
fri- 30 mins cardio
sat- back and shoulders
sun- REST!!

Rotate HIIT in your cardio routine(15-20 mins a session)- Do you know what HIIT is? And with exercises start maybe with 2 sets of each exercise- don't be afraid to lift heavy- eating around 1700 cals will not make you gain HUGE muscles!! :) (If this is what you are afraid of.) I would be more than happy to go over exercises and other information- just let me know. And again this is just my opinion- I wish you the best of luck hon!
Lots of Love
Dawn
P.S. Getting your bodyfat checked- if you are a member of a gym they might have methods to check. Ask a trainer or the front desk- or I bet your school has a health department- you might have to pay like 15 dollars to get it checked- if you do make sure the day before to dirnk plenty of water and no lotion or working out before you get it tested! :)

[Jennifer-Lynn]

SV: great advice, BUMP!

BubblePop: Silly is right on with the weight issue...I would also recommend gaining weight (muscle) not losing anymore..can you post some Pics?

[taifighter]

I second that! I don't know if you are one of these people, but you can be "skinny fat" where you don't weigh much but have a high percentage of body fat. I am saying this because THAT is how I was for a long time...because I was following the EXACT SAME workout/diet as yourself. I was eating 1500 calories MAX (my magic number for weight loss...of course, I was ALWAYS trying to lose weight, sigh) and doing an hour of cardio a day, burning 500 calories. At some point, my body just stopped losing weight. I hovered at 125. I dropped my calories more...lost a little weight...but gained it right back. And gained it as FAT!! DOH!!!!

My problem was, from for years of yo-yo ing (in school I'd pig out, during summer I'd starve and exercise) I'd lose weight (muscle) and eventually gain it back (in fat). So by the time I graduated, I weighed 127, looked pretty thin but my bodyfat was at least 25%!!! Yikes!! On top of that, I had slowed my metabolism waaaay down.

Anyway, I don't mean to lecture you, or say you are going thru what I did...it just sounds a little familiar. I'd advice posting pics and getting your bf% tested. I think the best thing for you to do is focus on GAINING lean muscle. Lean muscle will burn the fat you may have, and slowly start to re-charge your metabolism. By eating MORE clean calories, dropping the cardio to a few weekly sessions and lifting MORE often w/ HEAVY weights I think you will start to see the body composition changes you've been trying to achieve with diet and exercise. GOOD LUCK! :D

PS sorry for all the caps, I say these posts in my head as I'm typing and thats where I'd be gesturing or emphasizing a word ;) hehe