A Question for ladies about engagement (SERIOUS)

[Kores]

Why do girls always want be engaged before marriage??

Does it make you feel special or something?

I'm asking this because my GF wants to get engaged and I'm like "it's not gonna chance anything.

Discuss

[HeatherAC]

Why do girls always want be engaged before marriage??

Does it make you feel special or something?

I'm asking this because my GF wants to get engaged and I'm like "it's not gonna chance anything.

Discuss

Yes, it makes a girl feel special. It also is a closer commitment than just dating. Whether or not you intend to get married in the near or distant future, an "official" engagement will allow your girl to feel more secure in your relationship and the direction it is heading.

If it's not going to change anything in your mind, then it shouldn't be a big deal, should it? If you are indeed committed and in love with your girl with the intention of marriage, then there should be no issue.

Oh, and the bonus? A ring lets other guys know that your girl is off limits.

But, if being engaged truly bothers you, it may raise a red flag and be an indication that you need to take a closer look at your feelings and your relationship.

[Kores]

I guess it makes her feel special having a ring on her finger.

This may have to do with the fact that I don't see the need for it.

I do want to get married to this girl someday.

[anb1683]

I think that the whole engagement thing is more of a reason to plan your wedding, it?s a milestone in a relationship. You propose and generally start planning a wedding?Some people have long engagements but mostly it?s for security. Girls think if they have a ring they have you and that its more of a commitment on your end. Plus there is the romantic part of it?proposing and being engaged, its exciting for a girl. You have to understand Most girls (NOT ALL) have been planning their wedding since they can remember and when they love the right person they want that next step?Personally I think engagements are unfair, the man proposes, but he?s had months to think about it, he?s planned what ring he wants you to have, he knows he wants to marry you, then he just asks the girl, catches her off guard, proposes spending forever together and expects us to answer right away on the spot maybe in front of our families, friends, strangers?that?s a lot of pressure?obviously your situation is a little different she obviously wants to marry you. If you don?t want to propose, don?t do it. Marriage is a serious thing and so many people these days take it so lightly and like its not a sacred special joining of two lives?if you have doubts don?t do it?wait till you are 100% sure and explain that to your Girlfriend?just because she knows she wants to spend forever with you doesn?t mean you have to feel the same way, just as long as you are honest with her and you are loving her with all you can at this time in your life. Sorry I?m rambling?GOOD LUCK

[Camogirlie]

What girl doesn’t like a pretty sparkly ring!! Being engaged is like the NEXT step sorta.. Like HeatherAC said its kinda like a sure thing of commitment.. Although, now a days marriage is so different.. It use to mean forever.. Now it kinda just means "until you get bored/irritated/or something better comes along" My man has changed my views on marriage a lot.. he doesn’t really believe in the whole CONTRACT= commitment. He believes if your committed your committed you shouldn’t have to have a piece of paper say you are.. So i agree with you on that one.. But.. I still want a ring someday! LOL.. A ring makes you feel like you’re someone’s special girl! Every girl grows up thinking about their prince charming and how in love they will be.. Its just the next step.. like the conclusion to the fairy tale... and they live happily ever after......Hope that made sense! Good luck!

[empresscat]

Engagement is the difference between "he might want to marry me some day" and "we will be married someday."

It's the difference between maybe, and yes.


That's why girls want to be engaged. You can get married without an engagement, but only if you do it in Vegas - a wedding takes time to plan.

[HeatherAC]

He believes if your committed your committed you shouldn?t have to have a piece of paper say you are.. So i agree with you on that one.. But.. I still want a ring someday! LOL.. A ring makes you feel like you?re someone?s special girl! Every girl grows up thinking about their prince charming and how in love they will be..

That is so funny, I told my man that I don't care if we get legally married, I just want the jewelry! (yes, ring)

[anb1683]

That is so funny, I told my man that I don't care if we get legally married, I just want the jewelry! (yes, ring)
See I care about the marriage part and not the ring persay...It's something sacred and special to me...my man and God, I look forward to the married life as long as I end up with the right person of course, but I'm no where near that stage in my life yet.

[Pilotgirl29]

Engagement is the difference between "he might want to marry me some day" and "we will be married someday."

It's the difference between maybe, and yes.


That's why girls want to be engaged. You can get married without an engagement, but only if you do it in Vegas - a wedding takes time to plan.


Exactly. THIS is your reason.

[Camogirlie]

See I care about the marriage part and not the ring persay...It's something sacred and special to me...my man and God, I look forward to the married life as long as I end up with the right person of course, but I'm no where near that stage in my life yet.


I do want to get married.. I just dont care about the contract.. I want a Ceremony and to be married in the eyes of God. But a legal document saying "hes mine" and "shes his" isnt necessary.. He will show his commitment with his actions.

[LiftingIsLife]

Yes, it makes a girl feel special. It also is a closer commitment than just dating. Whether or not you intend to get married in the near or distant future, an "official" engagement will allow your girl to feel more secure in your relationship and the direction it is heading.


very true for most women, except perhaps for the most independent of
women...





Oh, and the bonus? A ring lets other guys know that your girl is off limits.



maybe in your neck of the woods, heather, but definitely not here on
the east coast! i've seen many 'engaged' women with rings on their
fingers getting hit-on in the business world, AND, out at clubs when their
man is not present.... <maybe back in the 50s your statement was
valid, but i cant comment not being around then>


best,
~lifer

[SurelyShirley]

Why do girls always want be engaged before marriage??

Does it make you feel special or something?

I'm asking this because my GF wants to get engaged and I'm like "it's not gonna chance anything.

Discuss

Some chicks simply like the romance of it all. It is one of the biggest commitments that you could make in your life, so why not make it special? (and yes for some ladies it DOES make them feel very special!)

Getting down on one knee, talking about how much you love her and how you couldnt imagine spending the rest of your life without her,*THE BLING*. All of those things might be important to your gal. Some people dont want such a fuss, but if she's a lovey-dovey type then I say go for it.

[Kores]

Thanks for your input girls

[wouldlikemuscle]

Being engaged kinda has to happen before marriage anyway... even in the Las Vegas scenario, those minutes between saying lets get married and getting married is still a period of engagement.

And engagement certainly doesn't mean "we will be married someday". My parents got engaged... split up before getting married.. and before I was born.

[Dwizzo]

http://www.partial.com/trap.jpg

PS - I'm engaged :D

[artsong27]

I do want to get married.. I just dont care about the contract.. I want a Ceremony and to be married in the eyes of God. But a legal document saying "hes mine" and "shes his" isnt necessary.. He will show his commitment with his actions.

In my opinion, the 'contract' is extremely important, for legal reasons, and the lack thereof is why you see so many live in girfriends on Judge Judy, suing for things like restaurant bills, credit card purchases, and rent. Ridiculous.

I just got engaged 4 weeks ago today (yay for me!!), and it does mean a lot to a girl. For me, it wasn't about the ring, and I let the cop know that from the very beginning. In fact, he was more concerned with the ring than I was. What I'm looking forward to most, which may sound silly, is not having to be dropped off at my house after a night on the town; kissing him goodnight and watching him drive off. When it's time to go home, I want us to go to OUR home, together. I just want to be there, with him, all the time. Ok, I'm gonna cry!!!!

The engagement IS a milestone in the relationship, and it signifies going to the next level. Keep in mind, when you are dating, you are introduced as 'girfriend". When you are engaged, you are introduced as 'fiancee'. There is a huge difference in that. Don't rush it though. If there is pressure and you're not quite ready, don't do it.