Starting all over again-need a mentor.

[wannabeMs.O]

I am in need of a mentor,someone who is patient and won't trample over what little ego I have. I am a 35 year old nurse who use to be fairly physically fit. I married a great guy and gained a lot of weight after getting married and having a baby four years later. I really enjoyed weight lifting when I was younger and did it very quietly to avoid ridicule from my family. Now that I am past 35 I really don't care what anyone thinks (thank God). All I see in hospitals are overweight and unfit people whose lives are in the toilet because they didn't get their act together when they were younger. Guess what those people say just before they pass away, "Don't end up like this". My wakeup call was taking care of a 400 lb woman who had bypass surgery that went bad. She can't even roll over (but she is a very nice lady,just in a bad situation). We have had to buy more "bariatric" beds (beds for people who are 350lbs+)at our hospital because of the rising need for taking care of these patients.I don't want to end up like them but at the same time I don't have anyone to talk to about really wanting to get in the best shape and the most muscle mass possible. People in the south think there is something wrong with a girl who actually wants muscles. I am 5'7 , 250lbs (no that is not a typo,yes I am a BIG girl),and my bodyshape is rather odd when I was thin. Get this- big head,big shoulders, big hips. But I do remember when I was in college I could pack on a lot of mass without the drugs. I would just like some inspiration and pointers to keep going a what would be a good basic weight training routine for people starting out. Thankyou for your help. wannabeMs.O

[cdmuscle]

Welcome!

Hope this site is helpful and entertaining. There are a lot of diverse people who post here and it can get really interesting. Keep an open mind and research before you try!

Best of luck to you!

[MsFit]

Wow.....I hear you. I'm not going to be another statistic either.

You're on the right track and headed in the right direction. My input right now would be the types of food you are eating. I a big believer that processed carbs and trans fat is causing the downfall of health.

For starters you might want to adjust your nutrition if you haven't already. Choose more fresh meat, fruits, and vegetables. Limit or avoid processed carbs, such as pasta, bread, dairy, etc.

Start resistance training 3-4 times a week and add some cardio on alternate days 3-4 times a week.

[cdmuscle]

Bump to that! I agree completely w/MsFit!

Way to go

[Laurie]

Hello WannbeMs.O

I am 5'6", 51 and weighed 240 for years. Anywhere from 245 to 260 in the last 30 years of my marriage, really. I am also big boned, broad shouldered and never been "skinny". Always a "Big girl" at 175 and used to ride a 10 speed all over while in High School and College. So was always "overweight" but was firm. What used to be called "good farmgirl stock".....at a time when "Twiggy" was the fashionplate.

I carry my fat much like a man (back, shoulders and stomach) but have been rather strong otherwise by living on a mining claim after marriage, for years. Then moving here and raising animals when not helping my husband in the family business (My husband is a tradtional Armourer, forging out weaponry in a blacksmith shop for reenactors. I decorate the pieces). Have two teenagers, both by ceasarean (both ways) so my abs were pretty messed up.

But all that weight was getting to me. Back would hurt after walking although I know there is some osteo there. Most of it was caused by my weight. I was getting out of balance, losing flexibility. Picking myself off the ground after playing with the kids (when they were younger) was getting harder. Getting out of the car was a pain and was just feeling miserable. Where I am, there are plenty of overweight "snowbirds" who come to my part of Arizona, with all kinds of health complaints. I did not want to look like the overweight ones nor hobble around like others I see in my older years. I also live near a reservation (C.R.I.T) where obesity is a problem among the Mohave and Pima especially.

Although Diabetes does not run in my family, it does in my husband (who is Type 2) and controls it with diet. I have been fortunate enough to have a constitution like a horse. Rarely get sick but I do have some osteo in my shoulders and lower back. Being overweight has not helped with the latter. I figured someday that strong constitution was going to give out....and I would be in a similar situation as you described. I do not want that.

I went through Menopause in my mid 40s and slowly my weight did go down to 240. Mostly by not eating as much as I used to but have not been very active otherwise. I come from a time when a girl taking up weights was unheard of. Getting muscles was somehow thought "wrong". Oh, you could play softball, volleyball and all that.....but weights? In a sweaty Boy's Gym? You were asking for "whispers" and problems. My mother's family is from the South and know excatly what you mean.

My husband did not think a woman lifting was out of the question. His mother was the outdoors type and raised farm animals. So a woman wanting to be strong was just fine with him. I did try lifting at one time but did not have a focus. Did not know where to go (no gym around) nor was there a book to guide you (that I knew of) in the early 70s. So I lost interest afterwhile. I had been wearing size 48 jeans for years and wearing XL/XXL t shirts to cover my stomach. Just resigned to the thought this was going to be it.

But then Times have changed. Women wanting to lift are not thought of as "freaks" or not as badly. From what I saw of the "Strong Women" contests, I could identify with them more and found strength came in all sizes as well as beauty. Then my son got a two year scholarship to a local community college and I had to take him to classes. Last year, I decided to take physcial education class.....but knew my knees may not survive an aerobics class. But there was a "Women's Strength Class" (Weights). So back in September 2002, I took it.

WOW! I found the focus, again, driven by what I did not want to become. The instructor (male) has us all start out with low freeweights (3-5-10lbs) and the machines. I soon found I was able to easily go beyond those. (most of the women were more sedentary and larger) The instructor felt I was stronger and encouraged me to try heavier weights. I liked the feeling, the empowerment it gave......especially when I noticed wardrobe changes. The first semester results were showing in loss of inches, fat and gaining strength. It did help to do some research and modify my diet while doing this.

This September will be a full year of going to the classes, three times a week. I now weigh 195 and lost nearly 10 inches in my waist. I prefer to use my wardrobe rather than the bathroom scale as an indicator. I weighed about 175 when I married my husband in 1971. I am not vain and would not mind wearing the same size clothing as I did then (36/16).....even if the scale may say I weigh more (muscle weight displacement from fat weight). I just do not see myself being 145 (what all the insurance lists say I "should" be). Just a matter of my own self image.

With the Summer classes over, I work out in my own "gym" with freeweights until the Fall Semester starts. My husband found a professional Olympic bench and weights at a St. Vincent de Paul's to add to some other commercial weights I had back in December. This was his Xmas gift to me.

Bless him.

If this helps you get motivated....good. As you say, working in the hospital gives you one side. Reading the posts here will help you with the other. You might want to try posting in the "Over 35" forum too. You will get alot of encouragment there too.

After being so "obese" for so many decades, 195 is not too bad and have not felt so good in many years. My doctor is estastic and wants me to continue. Time and patience. Three days a week.

Maybe I might just get down to 145 after all. (grins)

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Bench bb 125 - 135
Bench dbl 35
Incline bb 95
Curls 25 dbl
Squat 235